by Martha Carr
"Have you seen the large balls of light on the fence out front? Estelle has a vision. That pink tree is cool."
"Let's hurry up and finish before Estelle gets back. Someone has to figure out when Leira's place will be empty."
"Or we just storm the place and set up right in front of her, ignoring her swearing."
"I don't even hear it anymore. She says, motherfucker, and I say, fine, how are you."
"You think Correk might make it back in time for a party?"
"Not likely. They made it sound like he was undercover somewhere."
"I'll bring a baked brie and ginger snaps. Everybody always loves it."
"How does a tall drink of water like that go unnoticed?"
"Not unnoticed. Undercover. Put your tongue back in your head, Mitzi. You look like Lemon."
"Estelle's got better things to do. She's all the way inside, not paying any attention to us. She can't hear us."
"Doesn't mean a thing." Kimberly's eyebrows shot up as someone came out the door to the patio but it was just a couple of University of Texas students headed for the corn hole game. "You'd think we were a bunch of kids."
"That's just because we want to break the rules for once and do something for Leira. You saw that living room." Cassidy's eyes grew wider at the memory. "Not a lot of decoration on a regular day."
Mike leaned across the bar, keeping an eye on the windows and filled his glass from the tap. He sat back and drank down half, hiding the evidence. "Getting away with shit is half the fun."
"You always leave such a huge tip. What exactly are you getting away with?" Craig shook his head.
"This is Estelle's place and we are here by invitation. I'm risking banishment." He gulped down the last few swallows, not willing to risk it.
"To God knows where. You'd have to try one of the bars down the street and fight through the millennials. No beer is worth that."
"He likes to live on the edge."
"It's more like the edge of a butter knife."
"Fuck you, Craig and your little spreadsheets too."
"Don't insult a man's spreadsheet."
"Can we focus for just a second here on Leira? Men."
"I know what I'm going to get her for Christmas. A framed picture of us. Give her something to look at." Mitzi nodded her head, determined.
"Normally, doesn't matter. She's hardly ever there except to sleep but now Leira's stuck there for the duration. We should do something. Liven it up for her. Hang on, I'll make a spreadsheet." Craig pulled out his laptop.
Paul looked over his shoulder. "That's like your diary, isn't it? Your entire life in a spreadsheet. Is your sex life mapped out in there? No?"
"I'll get the tree," said Mike, eyeing the tap again.
"Don't do it, dude. Estelle can sense a disturbance in the force as small as a flea peeing. It's not worth it. You should take up freestyle rock climbing or parachuting instead. Less dangerous," said Scott.
"Get the tree from the lot over in front of the Whole Foods. They have the nice, full ones." Mitzi broke off a piece of a cracker and opened her large purse. Her small dog, Lemon poked his head up as she fed him the cracker. "I can get the lights and some decorations. I wonder if Leira has any."
"Does anyone have an idea of when we'll do this? We have a snowball's chance in hell of talking Leira into it," said Kimberly. "It's gonna' have to be when she's out and that hasn't happened much lately."
"Her mom is there and she likes us." Craig looked up from his laptop. He was busy typing in everyone's name and making different columns. "Who's bringing food?"
"I can make my famous chili," said Cassidy, raising her hand.
"I'll make cornbread." Mitzi broke off another piece of the cracker, feeding it to Lemon.
"You feed that dog regular dog food too, right?" Kimberly looked inside the large purse as Lemon looked up and let out a sharp bark.
"Craig make those empanadas you brought to the last potluck!" Mike started to lean over the bar as Estelle passed by the window and looked him dead in the eye. He froze and held her gaze, not sure what else to do. She squinted, pausing by the window before moving on to somewhere further inside the restaurant. "Felt like something passed over my grave." Mike's face was ashen.
Craig let out a laugh and clapped him on the shoulder. "We should tell the regulars from that other bar. What was it?"
"The Jackalope."
"That's right, that place. Make it a real party."
"I'll call them. I got Toni's number. Really liked her. There was something about her."
"First we have to figure out how to get in there to even decorate the place and then we have to grow large enough balls to throw the party and damn the consequences from Estelle." Scott held out his hand. "Come on, pile on. We're either all in or all out. Who's with me?"
"Fuck it, I'm in." Mitzi slapped her small, pudgy hand on top of Scott's as Craig put down his laptop and covered her hand completely with his large, leathery hand. The others, one by one quickly put their hands on top and quietly Mike said, "All for one..."
"And one for all..." they echoed back.
"What in the sam hill tarnation are you people doing out here? You didn't go start a team without me, did you?" Estelle was back on her stool behind the bar, pouring Mike a drink and shoving it in front of him in one fluid motion. He started and slid awkwardly off his stool, catching himself before he fell all the way to the floor.
"She always knows..." Cassidy whispered in his ear.
"Bat hearing," whispered Paul.
Estelle regarded all of them and put her fingers around her cigarette, taking in a long drag and letting the smoke out slowly. "You making plans for the holidays?"
Mitzi hummed the first few bars from the Exorcist under her breath.
"Dinner with the family."
"What he said." Craig slowly shut his computer and put it away as everyone went back to talking about the warm winter or watching the nearby corn hole game.
"Uh huh." Estelle let out a grunt and stepped down from her stool without taking her eyes off them. She waited a second and turned to go inside. A sly smile spread across her face, deepening the wrinkles around her mouth. "Bout time," she muttered just out of earshot, the cigarette bobbing in her mouth. "Party would be nice."
CHAPTER THREE
"Come on, I don't think the doctor meant for you to never leave that couch. It's been nearly a week. You've worn a pattern into the floor from here to the bathroom and back." Eireka stood over her daughter, her hands on her hips. Her boyfriend, Donald stood just behind her, waiting for directions from someone.
The troll stood on the back of the couch watching the movie, Ratatouille. He kept moving every time Eireka or Donald moved so he could get a better view of the screen. The movie was almost at his favorite part where the rat finally got to cook up a storm. The troll let out a contented sigh as Leira looked up at him. He looked back at her and raised his little paws. "Go on, go. Shoo, get outta here," he squeaked.
"Is that your Bronx accent?" Leira wet a finger and held it up in the air. "It's a cold day." Yumfuck let out a cackle.
"How can you tell from the couch." Eireka pressed her lips together.
"The blast of air that came in when you opened the door."
The door opened suddenly as Eireka looked at her daughter.
"Don't look at me. I didn't cause that one." Leira held up her hands in protest. "I'm in plaid, flannel pajama pants. I can't fit anything else over this giant thing. Bring the food to me."
Mara came bustling into the guest house, kicking the door shut behind her with her foot. "Sorry about that. The door got away from me. Why aren't you up yet? Get your ass off that couch. It's starting to become one with you. It's not an attractive look. Enough already." Mara sent out a stream of magic to Leira that rolled over her skin, tickling her arms and running across her belly, surrounding her in a warm embrace. "Let's try that new Greek place. You can prop your leg up just as easily there. Get up before I levitate y
ou."
"Is that a thing?"
"Drag your ass and find out!" Mara smiled broadly and put out her hands like she was about to cast a spell.
Leira sat herself up higher and hesitated. "I want to see if you can do it." A crooked smile appeared on her face. Her hair stuck straight up in the back where she had been lying down. Mara waved an arm as her eyes lit up and the magic wove itself in a circular pattern underneath Leira's ass, slowly lifting her into a standing position. Leira grimaced from the pain of shifting but didn't resist. She knew it was time and guided her leg over the side.
Donald came alongside her as she threw her arm over his shoulder. He watched the golden and purple swirl of magic, mesmerized. "Can't say that isn't cool. You doing okay?"
"So far, so good. Nana, if you could do this all along..."
"I was waiting to pick my moment. Where's your crutches?"
The troll bounded off the couch and scrambled underneath, pulling out a crutch. He was covered in dust as he ran for the bathroom while everyone waited. There was the sound of something metallic hitting the floor followed by the troll yelling, "I'm fine, no worries." He finally appeared holding the crutch over his head, covered in baby powder, shaking off a fine silt with every step. Leira looked at him and let out a snort. "It never bothers him to be covered in all kinds of crap."
"You forget how strong the little booger is." Mara took the crutch from him and brushed off the top. "You done good. I'll bring you back some stuffed grape leaves." The troll let out a trill and climbed back onto the couch leaving a track of small white footprints.
"World's smallest yeti," said Donald, glancing over his shoulder. "I can help you out to the car. Hell, I can even carry you but that doesn't seem like it's really you. Ready to give the crutches a try?"
The troll let out a cackle and looked at Leira, winking. She gave him a dead fish look but he was already entranced by the movie again. She took the crutches and steadied herself. "Open the door for me. Once I get started I want to just keep going." She put the crutches out in front and easily swung forward, ignoring the ache in her leg as she easily crossed the living room and out the door.
"Why that little fucker! She's been boondoggin us this entire time. You've been getting out!" Mara smiled and winked at the troll. "You kept her secret. I can respect that. Wondered how the crutch got into the bathroom on its own."
The troll lifted the edge of the cushion and showed the wrappers from the food trucks down the street.
"So this isn't her first outing. She just wanted to be alone for a while." Eireka arched an eyebrow and took off after her daughter. Donald followed closely behind as Leira easily made her way toward the gate.
"Hard to keep a Berens woman down, especially when we get hungry. We'll be back when we're back." She waved to Yumfuck as she pulled the door shut behind her, not bothering to lock it.
The troll settled back on the couch and let out another contented sigh followed by a cackle. "A cooking rat! Too funny!"
CHAPTER FOUR
Mitzi saw Leira swinging easily across the patio on her crutches, maneuvering her way out of the gate, closely followed by everyone else. She couldn't believe her luck. Just when she thought she was going to have to enlist Estelle and confess everything the guest house was empty. Guests were all coming in a few hours whether Mitzi had pulled off her part of the plan, or not.
Her hands were shaking as she texted Craig and Mike, 'Coast is clear, bring the tree through the gate... Just this once. Tell the others to get a move on. We have two hours. Tops.'
"Estelle will pitch a royal fit but it has to be done. Can't very well drag a spruce through the middle of the bar." Mitzi wrung her hands, watching the inside of the bar through the windows for signs of Estelle. The red bouffant made it easy to spot her through any crowd but it was nowhere to be seen. "I am just having one helluva lucky day today."
The door to the gate swung open and Mike came through carrying one end of the tree, closely followed by Scott with the other end. Cassidy and Kimberly were behind them carrying bags of decorations and food as Craig brought up the rear with a large crock pot.
"We are cooking with gas." Mitzi ran ahead to open the door to the guest house, keeping her eye on the bar. "Hurry, hurry." She waved frantically as she opened the door.
The troll looked up from the couch and saw the backside of Mitzi waving her arms. He dove behind the cushions just as she turned around to look inside the living room for a good place to put the tree. He pulled himself along under the cushions, his mouth open taking in old crumbs and lost popcorn kernels. "Yum!"
Mitzi startled and turned around again, looking in every direction. "Huh..."
She didn't have time to think about it as the tip of the tree poked her in the back. "Right over here!"
She got out of the way as Mike and Scott came barreling through with the tree, momentarily getting stuck. "Turn slightly to the left. No, the other left."
The troll came across a penny and bit down on it, tossing it aside as he kept going till he reached the arm of the sofa. He peeked out from the back of the cushion and waited till everyone was focused on steadying the tree. Mike and Paul were fussing with the tree stand as Scott held it steady and the women stood back a foot to see if it was straight. Yumfuck saw his chance and made a break for the bedroom.
Craig came back from the kitchen with a scowl. "I think Leira might have mice in here."
"For another day, Craig. We don't have much time. Help us get the lights on this thing."
"I'm gonna go see if Leira has any ornaments in this place. Remind her of her childhood. Well, the good parts anyway."
"Mitzi, stay out of her stuff. That wasn't part of the plan!"
Mitzi wasn't listening and even grabbed Cassidy by the arm, pulling her along with her to check closets. They ventured into the bedroom as the troll slid under a pillow and watched them dig around in the back of Leira's closet. "Jackpot! Help me pull this out." Mitzi and Cassidy dragged out a plastic bin as Kimberly came in to help them. "Look, there's a whole box of ornaments. I remember these glass ones from my childhood. They must be Mara's."
"Look at this one..." Kimberly pulled out an opaque blue glass ball with a thread of gold looped at the top. She slid the loop over her finger and held it up for the others to see as the light caught it, sending rays of light dancing over the walls. "That's beautiful," she said, breathless. Mitzi and Cassidy stopped what they were doing and stared at the dancing streams of light.
"Has to be one of the prettiest ornaments I've ever seen." Kimberly's mouth hung open and her eyes were wide. They were all hypnotized by the light.
"Shake a leg, ladies!" Craig knocked hard on the door, knocking the women out of their reverie.
"What? Oh, right. Two hours! Get a move on!"
"Pretty sure that was you frozen like a statue. What's that you have there?"
"An ornament I found in Leira's closet buried in a box. It's a stunner."
"Let's put it near the colored lights on the tree. Right in the center!"
"I think it's some kind of prism. Imagine what that'll look like with all the different colors."
Yumfuck slid out from under the pillow and went to the closet, looking in at the box that was filled with some of Mara's old clothes from before her time in the world in between, along with a few things from Oriceran.
"Interesting." The troll went to the bureau and carefully slid open the bottom drawer, hanging off the knob, his toes barely touching the ground. He reached in and pulled out a disposable phone that Mara had given him, just in case. He thought about texting Mara to let her know but hesitated. He went to the edge of the door and peeked around, watching everyone laughing and jostling each other as they decorated the tree. "Nah," he whispered, a smile on his face.
Instead he punched in a different number and sent a text. 'Party over here. Bring donuts. Yumfuck.'
He went back to his corner by the door and watched the room transform as garlands were hung along the wall
s and mistletoe hung near the front door. The troll smiled and smacked his lips together. He watched Mitzi hang the blue glass ornament on the tree right in the front and made a round 'O' with his mouth. "Very interesting. Everybody will get their party on."
CHAPTER FIVE
Kimberly took a look around the room and smiled at what they had done. "Looks like Christmas threw up in here. Perfect!"
"Who's the kid sitting in Santa's lap?" Cassidy picked up one of the small gold frames lined up on the side table.
"That's my sister's kids. Thought it added a nice touch. I'll need to get those back later."
"Oh, I like the holly around the candles. That's a nice touch."
Mike lifted a slat on the blinds and peered through just in time to see the gate open. Leira elbowed it and pushed through, the others still chasing behind her. "She's here! Do we hide?"
"This isn't a surprise party!"
"Besides, all of us in her home will be enough of a surprise..."
"May we all live through it."
"She's got crutches so be ready to duck."
All of the regulars from Estelle's stood still, waiting for the door to open. Leira came barreling through, almost pitching herself into Scott and Craig.
"Surprise!" yelled Mitzi, holding out her arms.
Leira turned around like she was going to head back out the door but Eireka and Mara were already behind her, blocking her exit. Don came in and looked around, his eyes widening. "You guys have been busy."
Leira turned around and around, balancing on the crutches as she looked at the decorations and the hopeful faces on all of these people she came to see as friends. As she turned she saw the smiles on her mother and grandmother's faces and she thought about the last Christmas in this house.
It was empty. She looked over at her grandmother and mother. I had no idea where you were and I thought you were crazy. The regulars were looking at her, smiling but no one was coming any closer. And I kept my distance from all of you. Estelle brought over that plate of warm turkey and sat with me while I ate it. That was it. I think I even got called in to work a homicide. Everyone looks like they're waiting for me to say something. Correk.