Crashing Tides Duet: Anchored and Adrift

by Ruby Rowe

  Since this is not my kind of place, I need to ask Sailor how much she enjoys the lavish lifestyle compared to the one she lives with me. Of course, she didn’t eighty-six me when I took her to Walmart. That has to mean something.

  I follow her and the host to our table. Her father stands to shake my hand. He’s in his mid-fifties with salt-and-pepper hair. He’s also average height, fit and sophisticated, and I imagine he’s sizing me up, as well.

  The man is the CEO of a Fortune 500 company, and he’s meeting his daughter’s detective boyfriend. Why was it, again, that I wanted to meet them?

  “Hello, I’m Randall Lockwood, and this is my wife, Carolyn.”

  “I’m Jake Callister, and it’s a pleasure to meet you both.” Once I’ve shaken their hands, Sailor smooths out her skirt and takes a seat. After helping to push in her chair, I sit beside her.

  Yes, I asked Thatcher for pointers, and yes, I’m dropping his name. His mom is still my aunt, so I think I have the right. I’ll do about anything to make this evening run smoothly.

  “Jake, do you drink scotch?”

  “Yes, sir.”

  “Call me Randall,” he says before he orders my first drink and at least his second.

  “You look lovely, sweetheart,” Carolyn says as she examines Sailor.

  “Thank you.” My girl looks more like her father, inheriting his dark eyes and hair color. Her mother’s eyes and chin-length hair are a lighter, golden brown. Mrs. Lockwood did pass on to Sailor her small facial features.

  “What did you think of the Super Bowl, Jake?” Randall asks.

  “Seeing the Giants bring it home with that kind of point spread was fantastic.”

  Giving an approving smile, he says, “I couldn’t agree more.” At least we both like football. I look at the menu, which isn’t much of a menu at all. It’s only one-sided, and I have no clue what some of the items are.

  What is foie gras?

  I lean over to Sailor and whisper, “Direct me to the beef.”

  Giving me a sweet smile, she points to one item on the menu. Excellent. If I have meat, I’ll be happy.

  “What’s your profession, Jake?” Carolyn asks.

  “I’m a homicide detective for the 6th Precinct in Greenwich.”

  “Interesting,” she says as she and Mr. Lockwood exchange looks.

  Aaand, now I’ve lost them.

  “I have deep respect for Jake’s ability to handle such a gruesome job. I can’t imagine…” Sailor says.

  “Neither can I,” Carolyn adds with her hand over her chest. “Are your parents accepting of your career choice?”

  “My father’s a cop, so yes, they approve. Uh, Sailor told me you’re into art. My mother owns a pottery shop in the Village. Her work is incredible. You should drop by sometime.”

  “Oh, no dear,” she replies with a clipped laugh. “I’m into performing arts: the ballet, symphony, and Broadway shows.”

  “Yes, but you and Dad collect paintings and statues, as well,” Sailor interjects. “I think one of Jeanine’s pieces would look great in your house.”

  “I don’t get to Greenwich often, seeing as how someone doesn’t invite me over,” Carolyn replies with her eyebrows raised at her daughter.

  My drink appears at the perfect time, and as much as I want to down it to ease the tension in my gut, I refrain. We place our orders, and I recall Thatcher telling me not to insist on paying for dinner. He said it would be an insult to Mr. Lockwood.

  Why are there so many goddamn rules for the wealthy? It’s like they apply in public, but what happens behind closed doors is another story. In my eyes, that means they’re no better than middle-class people like myself.

  Sailor grips my hand under the table, and I notice hers is sweaty.

  “We need to rip off the Band-Aid. I can’t take the wait,” Sailor whispers.

  “Hell, no. I think we need to wait until we’re about to leave this joint. They don’t even know me yet.”

  “It’ll be OK.” She sits up straight. “Mom … Dad, we have some news. I’m sure you’re not going to be pleased, but I’m hoping you’ll be supportive. Jake and I are expecting a baby, and we couldn’t be happier about it.”

  Silence.

  Stares.

  More silence.

  Fuck.

  “Was this planned?” Mrs. Lockwood asks as Randall tosses back his scotch.

  How did you let this happen again? is what I imagine Carolyn would rather ask, but Sailor claims her parents won’t acknowledge her first pregnancy.

  “No, it wasn’t planned, and we were careful,” Sailor replies. “The doctor believes the herbal tea I’d been drinking interfered with the effectiveness of my birth control pills, and I wasn’t aware that could happen. It’s my fault.”

  She clamps down on my hand, and I know it’s to remind me that she actually feels it’s my and Elliott’s fault since Sailor was drinking the tea to prepare her body for anal sex. We didn’t tell her to do that, but I know better than to dispute it.

  “Well, I guess there’s only one thing to do then. We need to plan a wedding,” Mrs. Lockwood replies. “Don’t you agree, Randall?”

  She looks at him, and he looks at me. OK, he glares at me, and oh, shit.

  “It appears so, and the sooner the better.”

  “Just because Jake and I are having a baby doesn’t mean we have to get married right away.”

  “Yes, it does,” Randall says sternly.

  “Mr. and Mrs. Lockwood, I want you to know that I will always be there for Sailor and our child. That will not change regardless of our relationship status.”

  “Yes, well, our status is in jeopardy here. I’m in the public eye, and no daughter of mine is going to have a baby out of wedlock, especially with a…”

  “With a what?” I reply. “A middle-class guy from the Village?”

  He grips his empty glass while looking around for someone to replace it with a full one.

  “Since you’re dishing out judgment,” Sailor says, “I have some of my own. I found out you two have known all these years that I was not driving the car when Rebecca died.”

  “Sailor!” Carolyn snaps. “How did you find out about that? No, don’t tell me. This isn’t the place to discuss it.”

  “How could you let me believe I was keeping this monumental secret from you? The guilt I carried because of it, along with the way I was shamed for having Samuel, changed me.”

  “Why are you bringing this up now?” Randall asks after stealing a glimpse of me.

  “To remind you that neither of you is perfect and your actions hurt me deeply. For those reasons, you’re going to be supportive of Jake and me having this baby, and if we ever decide to get married, you’ll be the first to know. Got it?”

  Damn, I didn’t see that coming. Sailor told me she avoids her parents in order to avoid conflict, but not today. The anger she’s been holding in for over a decade is spilling on the table like red wine on white linen.

  “I don’t appreciate your tone, young lady,” he retorts.

  “Dad, if you want me to respect you and Mom, you have to show me respect, too. Your poor decisions caused me to keep my distance. I don’t want that, and I hope you don’t, either.”

  “We want you in our lives, Sailor,” Carolyn replies. “All I’ve ever wanted was for us to be closer.”

  “Well, in order to have a relationship with your grandchild and me, you’re going to be accepting of my relationship with Jake.” Turning her head, Sailor stares into my eyes. “I’ve never felt as loved as I do by this man. He’s going to be an exceptional father.”

  A server sets plates in front of us, but I can’t look away from Sailor. She said she feels my love more than she feels anyone else’s. Did she mean that, or was it to gain her parents’ approval?

  Leaning over, she presses her lips softly against mine.

  “Thank you,” I say under my breath.

  “No, thank you.” Turning back to face Mr. and Mrs. Lockwood,
she sits up straighter.

  “Now, is all this settled?”

  Her parents glance to each other and then at me before their eyes capture their daughter’s. I think they’re seeing this bold side of her for the first time, and they’re unsure what to make of it.

  “Sweetheart, we love you and will support you and Jake however you need us to,” Carolyn replies.

  “Dad, do you feel the same?”

  Boring his gaze into me, he exhales loudly enough for us to hear over the noisy patrons in the spacious room.

  “It’s going to take more scotch tonight, but yes, I support you … and Mr. Callister. I guess I’m ready for a grandchild, too.”

  “Great, then I hope we can put the past behind us the healthy way this time,” Sailor replies. Before letting go of my hand, she gives it one last squeeze. “I couldn’t have done this without you,” she murmurs.

  I finally look down at the small plate before me, and what the hell kind of salad is this? Four sprigs of something bright green is topped with a lone beet. Hell, at least give me a side of ranch dressing to drink. Sailor snickers, and it must be from the expression on my face. As my skin warms, I look at her.

  “Tell me my filet will be bigger than this salad.”

  “We’ll grab you a burger on the way home.”

  “Hey … did you mean what you said earlier about feeling my love the most?”

  Her smile disappears. “I did, but Jake—”

  “I know. I promise I won’t tell him.”

  CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO

  Elliott

  “I’m not that hungry, and you shouldn’t have fixed me lunch,” I say to Nicole as she sets a bowl of vegetable soup in front of me at her kitchen table.

  “You need to eat today, and I thought we agreed that you’re going to accept my help.”

  “It’s something I’ve never felt comfortable doing. I mean, accepting help from others.”

  “Why is that?”

  “For a lot of years, I didn’t feel I deserved it, so it’s a hard habit to break.”

  She sighs. “I think if you’d tell me more about your past, I’d understand the present a little better.”

  “Are you going back to work today?”

  “Nope. I took the entire day off since I didn’t know how long we’d be at the hospital for your PET scan.”

  “I’ve never shared this with anyone. Hell, I only found out about a part of it when Sailor reappeared in my life.”

  “You said you two had a past.”

  “Yeah, and it all started when I was dating her sister…”

  ***

  “I feel like I finally know the real you,” Nicole says after I tell her the long story about my abusive father, Rebecca’s death and Sailor having my baby. She brushes away the tears that she can’t hold in a second longer. They’ve been teetering on the brink ever since I described the car wreck. “Thank you for trusting me enough to tell me. That couldn’t have been easy.”

  “Do you think I’m a scumbag now?”

  “Why would you ask that?”

  “Because of the accident and for not being there for Sailor when she carried our child.”

  “No, Elliott, I don’t think less of you. You didn’t mean for any of it to happen, and you’re remorseful.” After wiping her eyes again, she hides a strand of her blond hair behind her ear. “You were young, and from what I’ve heard, and witnessed, you’ve punished yourself all these years.”

  “Yeah, but is the punishment enough? I’ll never know if it was the beers I drank, or my anger toward Rebecca, that affected my reaction when that car was headed straight for us.”

  “It doesn’t sound like there was anything you could’ve done to prevent the collision. I know we can’t truly understand why things happen the way they do, but maybe if Rebecca hadn’t died, you wouldn’t have become a doctor who saves lives every day. Maybe one life was sacrificed so you could save many.”

  “Did… I did save lives.”

  She reaches across the table and grasps my hand.

  “You will again. I know it.”

  “No, you don’t, and we’re not going to pretend everything will be fine when we don’t know for sure.”

  “What you’re saying is you’d rather pretend everything won’t be fine when we don’t know for sure.”

  Shaking my head, I smile. “You’re still tough and stubborn.”

  “Yeah, and I know you’ve never liked that about me.”

  “That’s not true. It’s…” Shit. I almost said the word sexy. I guess because being strong is a sexy quality in a woman. At least, to me it is.

  “It’s what?”

  “Being strong is a great quality to possess.”

  “But not the stubborn part.”

  “No, but I’m not one to talk.” As we grin at each other, something tells me I need to leave. Yeah, I’m certain it’s time to leave since I’m feeling something I shouldn’t. “I have to head out.”

  “You barely touched your lunch.”

  “Sorry about that. I’ll eat something at the hotel.”

  “Why are you staying at a hotel?”

  “I can’t be at home on the days I’m supposed to work. Jake and Sailor would know something’s seriously wrong since I’d never miss this much work otherwise.”

  “You should tell them you’re sick before the biopsy.”

  “No, not until I have all the answers.”

  “I’d offer for you to stay here, but I don’t think Sailor would approve.”

  “I’m sure she wouldn’t, but thank you anyway.”

  “What if you start coughing up blood? What if you choked on it and no one was there to hear you?”

  I stand, needing to put some distance between us. I don’t deserve the care she’s showing me.

  “I’ll be all right. The medications I’m taking are helping with my symptoms.”

  “OK.” Standing, too, she reaches across her chest and grips her other arm like she’s trying to shield herself from something … or someone. “I’ll be glad once we know how serious this is.”

  Once we know…

  I thought Nicole would be less emotionally invested in this ordeal, but I’m beginning to wonder. After a few seconds of awkward silence, she comes over with tears in her eyes and hugs me. I can’t resist hugging her back, and fuck, letting her help me was probably a bad idea.

  Sailor

  “Thank you for stopping here with me,” Naomi, Marybeth’s sister, says as she parks near the bridal boutique. It’s where she and the rest of the wedding party purchased their gowns.

  I never dreamed I’d be friends with a woman who had a drunken one-night stand with Jake, but Naomi and I bonded at Thatcher’s engagement party. Lord knows I need more friends in this city. I’m also trying to get over my phobia of hanging out with socialites.

  “I thought I bought the right size heels, but when I wore them at home for an hour, they were slipping off. I can’t believe the wedding is almost here.”

  “Yeah, the time since their engagement party has flown by.”

  I follow Naomi into the boutique, and as I look around, she speaks with a salesclerk. The shop is pristine, the décor a pale pink, and the rows of white gowns manage to overshadow the colored bridesmaid dresses nearby.

  “Oooh, look at that one,” Naomi says, pointing to a gorgeous dress on display in the window. While we wait for the clerk to return with the new heels, we walk over to examine the eye-catching gown.

  It’s satin with very little embellishment, but that gives it a classy appearance. “Doesn’t it make you almost want to get married?” she asks with a giggle. Naomi doesn’t strike me as a woman who’d ever want to settle down.

  I, on the other hand, started dreaming about my wedding about the age of eight. My parents dragged me to quite a few ceremonies when I was young, and I recall being mesmerized by the breathtaking gowns and beautiful flowers.

  The brides were elated as they walked down the aisles, and I believed
that one day I’d find my Prince Charming, too. I ended up finding more than one, but not without a price. I’ll have to sacrifice the wedding of my dreams, among other things.

  While Naomi tries on the shoes the salesclerk brings her, I sneak a touch of the elegant gown. I notice how the tiny crystals adorning the bodice shimmer, and I’m in love.

  “Which one of your men are you thinking of when you look at that dress?” Naomi asks over my shoulder. Jumping, I release the gown.

  “Who told you?” I find the courage to face her, and she shrugs.

  “Harrison blabs when he drinks. We hook up when it benefits us, which I guess means we’re friends with benefits. Damn, that man gives mind-blowing oral. His tongue should be insured.”

  Her sly grin adds a stamp of approval. “It’s the only reason I keep seeing him. Anyway, back to you.” She tosses her blond hair over her shoulder. “Which man are you fancying the most?”

  “I love them both, but I was thinking about the wedding I won’t be having.”

  “You know, you could still have a commitment ceremony with them. You’d be the talk of the city for decades to come.”

  “I don’t think it would be the kind of talk I’d appreciate.”

  “Screw everyone else. I do what I want with no shame. My parents hate it, but they have Marybeth to brag on.”

  “I’m learning to live without guilt and shame, but it’s not easy. On top of it, I’m having to let go of a dream and accept a different future than the one I imagined most of my life. It’s an adjustment, but it is for the guys, as well, so I shouldn’t complain. I’m lucky they love me.”

  “That’s deep, girl.”

  “I can’t believe I shared it. I guess being in this shop brought some truth to light and stirred up my emotions.”

  “For now, why don’t you simply enjoy the guys? The sex has to be phenomenal. You’re still young, so I doubt you’re going to be with them forever. No offense, but what is the likelihood of this threesome working out? I imagine the odds are slimmer than the chances of me marrying.” She grasps my shoulder. “I bet you’ll get your dream wedding one day.”

  Imagining Jake in a tux, I frown.

  “I should probably get home. I have a staff meeting in the morning before school begins.”