Crashing Tides Duet: Anchored and Adrift

by Ruby Rowe

  Elliott

  “Where’s Sailor today?” I ask Jake as we do nothing in my hospital room besides watch ESPN. The good news is I might get to go home tomorrow. It’ll be day six, and that’s long enough to be inpatient after this surgery.

  “She went back to work.”

  I glance at him. “I’m glad she did, but I thought she was taking more time off.”

  “She was worrying about her students and figured your mom and I had it covered.”

  “She’s upset with me.”

  “About what?”

  “You know what. Don’t try to say you two haven’t talked about Nicole and me.”

  “OK, we discussed it, and Sailor said she needs a little space, but she isn’t mad at you. Have you called Nicole?”

  “No. I won’t hurt her again, and I can’t promise her I wouldn’t.”

  “You won’t be able to resolve this unless you talk to her. Just be honest when you do.”

  “She’s not going to trust me in the least, especially when Sailor’s pregnant.”

  “Well, your dick’s not good for shit right now, so I doubt she’ll think you’re trying to get some on the side.”

  “Have I called you an asshole today?”

  “Twice.”

  “My dick works fine. It’s the rest of me that won’t cooperate. Look, I’m not an idiot. If Nicole and I were to end up together, you’d have Sailor to yourself. It’s no wonder you’re encouraging me to call her.”

  “You know what? You’re the one being an asshole. Yeah, I did leave when I didn’t think I could share Sailor, but I came back and accepted our relationship. I’d never hurt her by trying to get you to be with someone else. That’s low, bro. I can’t believe you think I’d do that to her.”

  “Fine. I’m sorry. If it’s that important to the two of you that I deal with this, I will.”

  ***

  It’s eight o’clock at night, and I’m alone in my hospital room, missing my job and independence. I want to serve a purpose rather than feel like a burden. I wish I could work out, feel strong again and take care of my damn self. Not being in excruciating pain would be golden about now, too. Let me move that wish to the top of the list.

  I groan and turn off the television. It’s too quiet, and I don’t have Alexa here to converse with. Nicole... This would be a perfect time to call her. I grab my phone off the tray table.

  “Hello,” she says.

  “Nicole, this is Elliott.”

  “Hi. How are you feeling?”

  “Like shit, but I’m alive, so I’ll take it.”

  “I heard they may have gotten all the cancer.”

  “Yeah, I’m only waiting on the results of the lymph nodes. I’ll likely undergo a round of chemo, but I’ll take that, too, if it means I get to live.”

  “I’m happy for you. It’s good to hear you’ll be well when the baby’s born.”

  “For sure…” We’re quiet, and I’m not sure what to say. How do I even begin a conversation like the one we need to have? “Are you still seeing that Wall Street douche?”

  She giggles, and it’s cute. “No. I’m done with casual dating. It was fine when I was in college, and establishing my career, but I’m ready to settle down. Unfortunately, he’s not.”

  “You deserve a good guy.”

  “Thanks. Um, I guess I should get off here. Be sure to keep me posted on your health, though.”

  “You should drop by the condo one day soon. I get out of this joint tomorrow.”

  “Elliott, you don’t owe me anything. If the friendliness you’ve been showing me is out of guilt, I’ll remind you that I forgave you.”

  “It’s not out of guilt. I like talking to you.”

  “I don’t know what to make of this guy who likes to chat.”

  “He’s weird, huh?” I grin, wishing I could see her smile, too.

  “I don’t think Sailor would appreciate me hanging out with you.”

  “She doesn’t mind. Will you think about it?”

  “All right. You take care of yourself.”

  “Wait. That sounded like a no.”

  “I’m not sure what you want from me, Elliott. I understand you’re sick, and need support, but it doesn’t make sense why you’d lean on me when you have others in your life who love you.”

  “I need to talk to you about something, but in person. Will you please come over soon?”

  “OK. You call me when it’s a good time.”

  “Sure.”

  “Bye.”

  She hangs up, and damn, she was getting frustrated. I don’t think Sailor understands that my ex isn’t interested in spending time with me only to see if I may want to date her again.

  I thought men were the ones who didn’t understand women. Obviously, Sailor is clueless about this one.

  Sailor

  “You’re here,” I say to Elliott after arriving home from work. He’s stretched out in a new recliner we bought that has all the bells and whistles.

  “If you can call it that. I’m beginning to wonder if death would be a better option.”

  “Don’t say that.” Covering my stomach, I walk over to him. “Your baby’s growing inside me, and she needs you.” I give him a kiss on the cheek.

  “I didn’t mean it.”

  “I know, and I’m sorry you’re in so much pain.” I kick my flats off, and hearing a noise, I look toward the kitchen. “Is that the nurse?”

  “Yeah. I ran her off, so I think she’s trying to find something to do.”

  “You have to be nice.”

  “That’s difficult when she’s asking me every five minutes if I need anything, yet she can’t do a damn thing about my pain.”

  “It’s not her fault.”

  “She’s old and needs to retire.”

  “I’m sorry you didn’t get a hot nurse.”

  “No, you’re not.” He grins, and it’s nice to see a smile on his face. I should go meet this nurse, but I have a stronger need to curl up on the end of the couch and eat some chocolate truffles. I’m tired and hungry.

  “Have you talked to Nicole?” I ask.

  “I called her last night. I told her to stop by sometime, but it was pointless. You need to do what I said and let this go. I think being sick made me emotional, and I was looking for someone else to lean on so I wouldn’t hurt you.

  “Besides, Nicole’s struggling to even be my friend. There’s no way she’ll agree to spend time with me while I figure out if I want more with her.”

  He reaches his hand over to the end of the couch to hold mine. “I don’t need anyone else, Sailor. I love you.”

  “There was a reason you invited Nicole to our party and went to her house to confide in her. It’s the same reason you let her take you to have your medical procedures without our knowledge.

  “I love you, but I have to know without a shadow of a doubt where you stand before this baby arrives. Jake and I will be at Thatcher’s wedding Saturday and staying at the apartment that night. Have Nicole come over to visit while we’re gone. Maybe you’ll find your answer.”

  CHAPTER THIRTY-TWO

  Jake

  “Is Sailor still getting ready?” Elliott asks me from the recliner after I walk out of my room with my tux hanging off my shoulder.

  “Yep.”

  “Are you sure I should have Nicole over while you’re gone? I don’t want Sailor upset and it ruining your time with her at the wedding.”

  “She’s OK with it. She even seems excited about going. I’m glad she’s socializing more than when we met.”

  I hear my door shut before Sailor walks into the living room. My eyes start at her shiny tresses and work their way down her slender neck to the deep V in her thin cream blouse.

  It’s tucked inside a short, pleated navy skirt that doesn’t hide the luscious shape of her hips, which have become noticeably curvier over the last couple of weeks.

  “Damn, you’re smokin’ hot.”

  She blushes. “Thank you. E
lliott, are you sure you don’t need us to come home after the reception?”

  “I’m sure. I have a nurse staying the night, who I don’t even need.”

  “I feel better knowing you won’t be alone.” Her spiked heels click across the floor as she goes over to give him a kiss on the cheek.

  “You look sensational, by the way,” he says.

  “Thanks. Now, be nice to your nurses.”

  “Always.”

  “Uh, huh, right.” Sailor winks at him before glancing at me. “I only need to run upstairs to grab my overnight bag. Our Uber should be here any minute.”

  ***

  We’re dropped off at the church on 53rd St. Thatcher and Marybeth will be married here with their reception following the ceremony at Midtown Loft and Terrace. We barely make it through the doors when we spot Naomi speaking to a few women at a back pew.

  “Sailor, I’m so glad you’re here,” she says as she rushes toward us. “Marybeth’s best friend, Cassandra, is grounded at the airport in Minneapolis due to a snowstorm. She couldn’t fly in until today, which was her first mistake.

  “Anyway, we thought our cousin Rory could fill in for her, but she can’t fit in Cassandra’s dress. You’re the exact size, so would you please be in the wedding? You’d get to stand across from Jake.”

  Sailor looks at me and back to Naomi.

  “There’s no other friend or relative she’d prefer to have as a bridesmaid?” she asks.

  “It doesn’t matter; none of them are your size. Besides, Marybeth said having a Lockwood in the wedding only adds to its prestige.”

  “Jesus, Naomi. How do you manage to have less of a filter than I do?” I ask.

  “It’s no problem,” Sailor says. “I’d be happy to help.”

  “Great! Come with me.” Hooking her arm around Sailor, Naomi pulls her toward a door off to the side. “Jake, the guys are back here, too.” Since I’m part of the wedding party, we arrived before most of the guests.

  I admire the church’s architecture before me. The building’s over a hundred years old, and the ceilings must be close to one hundred feet tall.

  They tower above, along with ornate carvings that encase sapphire stained glass, all of which give the church an ancient, gothic feel. I’ve been here once before with my parents, and like the first time, I’m in awe of its design.

  Figuring I should find the guys, I head toward the door Sailor and Naomi disappeared through. It should be an exciting evening.

  Sailor

  Thank goodness my baby bump hasn’t appeared yet. I turn away from the mirror to look over my shoulder at the back of the lace burgundy dress that lands right above my knees.

  Since Naomi’s not wearing her long hair up, Marybeth said I could leave mine down, too. I was happy to hear it since I spent an hour curling my straight strands.

  “Here are your flowers,” Naomi says as she hands me a small bouquet of burgundy ranunculus and cream roses. The layers of silk petals are beautiful, and nestled between them are berry sprigs and Queen Anne’s lace. Growing up affluently, I know my flowers. They were always on our tables and filled our outdoor gardens.

  I face Marybeth, whose mother and grandmother have been putting the finishing touches on her. I cover my mouth. She’s stunning, every little girl’s idea of the perfect bride. Her understated makeup is flawless, and her honey-blond hair is up in a twist with only a few flyaway strands framing her face.

  “Marybeth, you’re breathtaking, and thank you for inviting me to be a part of your special day.”

  “Aww, Sailor, thank you. I’m grateful you saved the day.” She squeals. “Are we ready?”

  “Yes, we should be going,” her wedding planner says. The young woman, maybe my age, looks nervous as she messes with the train of Marybeth’s dress.

  We make our way to the nave where we’ll begin our walk down the aisle. I have to go first, and that stinks. I thought she’d have more bridesmaids than this.

  The wedding planner steps out to see if it’s time, and as the angelic processional begins, she nods toward the woman who’s supervising the flower girl and ring bearer. They’re maybe five or six years old, and since I was cornered into this ceremony only an hour ago, I have no idea who the children belong to.

  Once they’re close to the altar, I walk out to the aisle. The guests are turned to face me, and as I follow the trail of rose petals, I feel as if a hundred sets of eyes are nailing me to a cross. I’d be cussing Marybeth’s friend Cassandra with every step if it weren’t for the fact I’m in a church.

  Reaching the handsome groom and groomsmen, I take my place and face them. I can’t even deny that Harrison cleans up nicely. They smile at me, but once my eyes lock with Jake’s, I have no desire to look anywhere else. His grin and soft eyes always keep me from falling.

  Walking in front of me, Naomi breaks my trance with Jake. We pivot to watch Marybeth, and as the music changes to the bride’s processional, I feel my emotions joining the celebration.

  Marybeth is halfway down the aisle when I can’t resist glancing back at Thatcher. He’s staring at her as if the heavens have gifted him the meaning of life and that miracle is coming right toward him. It’s touching, making it hard to believe how many marriages end in divorce.

  I start to look at Marybeth again, but I catch sight of Jake. He’s gazing at me, and after a few seconds, it’s impossible to deny that he’s seeing me the same way Thatcher’s seeing his soon-to-be bride.

  No words have to leave Jake’s lips to explain the love his eyes bestow; there’s a depth of admiration I’ve never felt before, even from him. Our bodies are feet apart, but there’s no distance that could separate our souls.

  I press my hand to my chest as the seismic truth shakes me to my core. It shatters my doubts and fears. Jake’s love and presence will never waiver. He’d only leave me if his heart failed to beat. Elliott can no longer say the same.

  Elliott

  The doorbell rings, and the male RN working second shift heads for the door to answer it. I hate that I’m nervous to see Nicole. I’m normally not like this … weak and off-kilter.

  I push back my damp hair, and even that movement causes me pain. At least I was able to get a shower. It wasn’t easy, and now I’m exhausted, but I want to see Nicole.

  “Hi, she says with a hesitant smile.

  “Hi.” I nod to the nurse. I told him before Nicole arrived that he wasn’t to step foot in the living room while she was here unless I called for him. I’m such an easy patient.

  Taking off her jacket, Nicole sits at the end of the couch closest to me, and I get a whiff of her rose scent. She’s in a long-sleeve, snug shirt, and the light green color brings out the grassy-green in her hazel eyes.

  “You look better than I expected,” she says.

  “I hear it’s a huge improvement from the day of surgery. Jake took a picture to show me how much I looked like a science project. The guy should spend a night in the ER.”

  She laughs. “Jake’s funny.”

  “Yeah, he’s a good guy. We’re a lot closer than we used to be. You’ll have to help yourself, but there are plenty of drinks in the refrigerator if you’d like one.”

  “I’m good. Do you need anything?”

  “No, but thanks. I got my water here.” I glance to my plastic bottle. “I’m practically living in this chair. We put an adjustable bed in Jake’s room, and I sleep in it at night. He and Sailor moved to the spare room upstairs.”

  God, I’m jabbering like a fucking idiot.

  She reveals a humored yet perplexed expression.

  “What?” I ask.

  “Nothing. It’s none of my business.”

  “Come on. I want to hear.”

  “OK. I was trying to imagine how the sleeping arrangements worked around here before you were sick.”

  I feel my cheeks flush. “Do you really want to know?”

  “Yeah. I’m intrigued.”

  “OK … before I was sick, Sailor would stay in
Jake’s room while I worked, and she’d mostly stay in mine the nights I was home. It changed depending on what was going on.

  “Like, if Jake was tired or gone at night for a case, she’d stay with me, or if my grouchiness pissed her off, she’d stay with Jake.” I grin. “We haven’t had too many rules, and we’ve come to the conclusion that we’re the worst participants of a polyamorous relationship.”

  “Why is that?”

  “The first couple of months went smoothly. I think we were all on our best behavior, but then Jake and I had trouble hiding our jealousy, mainly Jake. By Christmas, he was finding the relationship near impossible, and he bailed after the holidays, saying he couldn’t share Sailor.”

  “What made him come back?”

  “He decided he’d rather make this work than give her up. I knew he’d come around. He loves her too much.”

  “That’s sweet.”

  “Yeah, he’s good for her.”

  “Aren’t you?”

  “Uh, they’re more alike, and if someone asked which one of us makes her happier, I’d have to admit it’s probably Jake. It’s like they’re more in sync or something. It’s hard to explain. All I know is the smile I see on her face when he’s near her is different than the one I see when we’re alone.”

  I shake my head. “I hadn’t really thought about it before you asked, and I can’t believe I shared that. I think my pain pills are making me loose-lipped.”

  “Can’t they cause that?”

  “Yeah, they can. I’ve witnessed it in the ER more times than I could count.”

  “What did you want to talk to me about?”

  Shit. I rub the back of my neck. I do feel something for Nicole. I know it because I want to tell her, yet I’m intimidated as hell, and that never happened when we dated before.

  I’ve always been smooth with women, and I fear I’m going to crash and burn before I even begin. I guess having a lobe of my lung removed, and being on narcotics, could cause it. I’m going with that, anyway.