Lost Memories (Honky Tonk Hearts)

by Thomas, Sherri

  Give it up. She’s an employee. And she deserved better than having her boss lust after her. He held no right to think of her in any other sense. The sexual attraction violated his ethics.

  Even so, Nick bit his tongue to keep from chuckling out loud as she sang along off-key and moved through the room without a care in the world.

  He stepped back to give her privacy only to trip on Dakota. The dog howled and in one sweeping movement, Darcy spun around, crossed the floor, and hit the power button on the radio.

  “Nick!” She wiped the sweat from her face. “How long have you been standing there?”

  “Not long.” He cleared his throat and picked up a rag off the floor.

  Her cheeks heated to a nice shade of pink beneath her tan as she twisted the broom handle.

  “Thanks for feeding Dakota.”

  “Your truck wasn’t there when I went to bed. I figured you must have got in pretty late.”

  “Actually, it was early this morning.”

  “Then you should have slept in.”

  Her eyes darted to his chest, reminding him of his absent shirt. Her caressing gaze boosted his male pride to levels beyond. His skin tingled with every inch her brown orbs touched as her sights traveled up to his face.

  “The place looks great. How ’bout we go on down to the main house and grab breakfast.”

  “I—I suppose I’m not going to get a better invitation. Unless we run into Horace, anyway.” She started out the door. “You know he’s my true love.”

  Her full, kissable lips turned up in a smile, a true genuine smile, one his brothers had privilege to, but not him.

  Until now.

  Nick followed her, taking note of the way she joked with him. He liked this playful attitude much better than the tension from before he left.

  “Great, now I’m second to a pig. If he tries to steal away the first female companion I’ve had in weeks, he may find himself on a platter with an apple in his mouth.”

  Her eyes darted over him again, then widened with his words. “You wouldn’t. Besides, I’m sure you’ve had plenty of dates.”

  The idea of entertaining didn’t hold much appeal. Though, the way Darcy looked at him made him realize what he’d been missing.

  “Where’s your shirt? Didn’t you learn anything last year?”

  “How’d you know about that?”

  “Chris told me how worried he’d been about you.” She shrugged and kicked a pebble. “He filled me in on different things about each one of you.”

  “Did he now?”

  This was news to Nick.

  The past year, Chris acted as if he didn’t care a scrap about his oldest brother.

  “Mmm-hmm. Hey, wait for us, will ya? You have four legs, we have two,” Darcy called out as Dakota ran ahead.

  Beside him, she skidded to a stop, her head whipping from one direction to another.

  Her skin paled beneath her tan. The expression marring her face resembled the day he’d hosed her off by the barn.

  He searched the area noting nothing out of the ordinary. What made her so jumpy?

  Her hand squeezed his bicep. “You ever feel like someone’s watching you?” she whispered.

  Chapter Six

  “Come again?”

  “You know, the hair on your neck standing up type sensations.” Her wide eyes stared at the tree line.

  On alert, he followed her gaze, curious over her odd behavior. “I don’t see anyone.”

  “Sorry. Must be my overactive imagination again.” She shrugged, but lingered for a moment, examining the area.

  “You need food.”

  He steered her toward the house and trudged up the steps of the wooden porch, holding the door open for her, but uneasiness gnawed at his gut at her sudden mood change.

  “Let me grab a shirt out of the dryer, and we’ll get some breakfast.” He crossed to the laundry room off the kitchen and pulled on a dark gray T-shirt.

  “Where’s Ms. Liz?” Darcy looked around the large kitchen and leaned on the center island.

  “I’m sure she’s around.” He opened one of the large refrigerators, removed the bacon, sausage, fried potatoes, flapjacks, and scrambled eggs. At the last minute, he grabbed a jar of strawberry jelly.

  The cook gave him an ear full on how his new employee put the stuff on everything she ate.

  “If you come in after a meal, she always keeps extra in the fridge.” He set out to warm up the food and pointed to the island. “Can you grab the silverware? Center drawer.”

  “Sure.” She carried the utensils into the spacious dining room.

  Nick followed behind her and placed the food on the buffet table located in the center of the room. Smaller booths sat in front of the floor-to-ceiling windows. “Why in here?”

  “I like the atmosphere. The fireplace is beautiful.” Darcy scooped a spoonful of eggs on her plate, three strips of bacon, and a pancake.

  Her calm demeanor a total contradiction from her paranoia moments ago. His narrowed glance followed her movements.

  Not sure what to make of her, he viewed the ceiling to floor, stone-encased hearth and was reminded of the many fall months they’d spent cutting, splitting, and stacking wood with their father. One day in particular haunted him to this day. His father had carried an armload of wood into the house and told Nick to keep an eye on his brothers. Minutes later, they rushed Sam to the hospital for slicing his palm open on a chainsaw.

  “Your family’s lucky to have such a great place. I love working here. Your brothers have been very patient teaching me everything I need to know.” She shifted in her seat, her leg brushing his.

  His groin instantly tightened.

  Don’t go there. Relationships do not mix with business. To distract himself, he shoveled a forkful of eggs into his mouth while she dug into her own food.

  “Are you excited about going on the camping trip?” he eventually asked.

  “Yes.” She broke off a piece of bacon and popped it into her mouth.

  “It’s an experience you won’t forget.”

  “What happens on these overnighters?” Darcy spread strawberry jelly on her pancake. One by one, she placed the digits in her mouth and sucked the sticky mess off her fingers.

  He imagined her tongue swirling around each one. The blood ran rapid through his veins, his heart pounded in his ears.

  “You, ah—” He cleared his throat. “You ever go camping?”

  She coughed, choking on her food.

  Nick reached over and pounded her on the back. “You okay, darlin’?”

  “Mmm-hmm.” She took small sips of her coffee and stared at her plate. “No. I’ve never gone camping.”

  “Really? Wow.” To everyone he knew, the recreation was part of growing up. How else did you learn about the great outdoors? Sure, a few of the women he dated didn’t care for the activity, but they went at one point or another. He wanted a woman who appreciated the ranch and all the land had to offer.

  Trent remained the only Matthews who came close to walking down the aisle. The bullet the surgeons cut out of his shoulder after an argument with his ex-fiancée soured the whole family’s view on matrimony. Nick beat himself up for months after the incident for not protecting his brother—for failing to see how demented his future sister-in-law had been. Now the woman across from him brought coffee to her lips with a trembling hand, eyes darting in every direction but his. Uneasiness settled back in his gut.

  “Well, I guess you’re in for your first. We ride the horses to a spot not too far and bed down for a couple nights.”

  She straightened and smiled. “I think the riding will be my favorite part.”

  “Don’t count out the rest of the experience.” He chuckled, masking the concern churning inside. She didn’t know how to muck stalls or what to feed the animals, but looked forward to handling the horses? The large creatures intimidated most people, but Darcy’s face lit up with the prospect of being near them. She was more of a puzzle every
day.

  Her hand came up to smooth a strand of hair from her face. Once again, her gaze strayed from him. She ruffled the strands at her forehead covering the pale puckering skin at her hairline. This wasn’t the first time the sparse, tiny, white marks on her hands called his attention. The notion of pressing her for details swirled on the tip of his tongue.

  “Hey, Darcy, I didn’t know you were in here. A guy called for you.” Chris entered the dining room, plate piled with food.

  “Yeah, right. I’ve had guys lining up at the door.” She rolled her eyes upward and laughed.

  “I’m serious.” The youngest pulled out a chair at the end of the table.

  Nick’s gut clenched. “What did he want?”

  “He asked if Darcy Brooks lived here. I told him you were out at the moment and he asked it again, ‘Darcy Brooks is working and living there?’” He shoved a forkful of food into his mouth, continuing around the food. “I said, ‘yes.’ Then I asked his name or if he wanted to leave a message, but he hung up.”

  A look of alarm crossed her face. “Odd, don’t you think?” She swiveled toward the windows.

  “He could have seen you out, asked around, and someone pointed him in this direction.”

  “Yeah.” She picked up her plate and headed toward the kitchen.

  “Shouldn’t you be headed for Tulsa, Nick?”

  Catching a glimpse of the anguish on her face, he pushed his chair back. “I postponed.”

  A strange feeling swirled in the pit of his stomach. First, she thought someone watched her and now this.

  “You keep putting it off, they’re gonna refuse to meet with you.”

  “Yeah. I’ll get there,” he replied absently.

  The idea of a man being interested in Darcy bothered him. She’d never mentioned another man. Was he a boyfriend from the past or a current one she’d failed to mention? If so, why was she so uneasy about the call? Could the guy be the reason she was so jumpy?

  “If anyone calls again, get their name before you give out any more information,” he told his brother. At least until I figure out if there is any danger here.

  He hurried out the door after her. “Darcy?” Quickening his steps to catch her, he grabbed her arm as she continued sprinting away from him.

  Darcy shook as she made her way across the yard. So what if someone called? Big deal. Months ago, she’d have jumped for joy at the notion—before she fell in love with her job, before she made a life for herself, before Ni—

  “Stop.” A large hand closed around her arm and pulled her to an even more impressive chest.

  She swallowed the cry in the back of her throat and stared at Nick’s torso. Her gaze traveled up to his concerned face.

  “What’s going on?” His eyes roamed over her.

  “N-nothing. I’m fine.” Wiggling her arm until he let go, she blinked to chase away any trace of emotion.

  His hands fell to his sides; his eyes narrowed. “You weren’t upset in there?” He jerked his thumb in the direction of the house.

  “I’m fine. I’m sorry if I led you to believe otherwise.” She bit her bottom lip to keep it from quivering. Realizing they stopped in the exact spot she felt someone watching her before, she rubbed her arms, waiting for the eerie sensation to envelop her, but it never came.

  Between the renewed sensations of someone watching her and now a man calling, she didn’t know what to think or where to turn.

  Hold me, Nick, please. I need to feel the contact. Need to feel like I’m not alone in this world before the shadows swallow me.

  “And here I thought we were working toward a friendship.” Beefy arms folded over his chest and closed off any more images of him wrapping her in his embrace.

  “Honestly, I’m fine.” Her mind raced to the easiest explanation. “I was hoping to go into town and spend time with my friend Jordan.” The idea of seeing her raised her spirits the instance she spoke the hasty-made plans.

  His sights bore through her as if he read her every thought.

  “I have to go. I’m okay, really.” She spun on her heels and fled to the barn before he saw too deep within her soul.

  Her jangled nerves spiraled out of control. If she didn’t get a handle on herself, he was sure to get suspicious.

  Ha. Who am I kidding? He knew she hid something. Keeping her amnesia a secret from the Matthews family had sounded like a good idea in the beginning, but now she questioned her logic. Now she felt prisoner to her own mind.

  She did need to see Jordan, someone who knew her secret.

  ****

  “I can’t believe you still haven’t told him?” Jordan sat on the floral print sofa with her legs crossed. “I kept your secret from Tammy only because the information should come from you. I even understand why you didn’t tell them during the interview with the other places denying you employment, but this has gone on long enough.”

  “I love my job. I don’t want to lose it.”

  “You have to tell Nick.” The nurse brushed her long blonde hair off her shoulder. Worry filled her blue eyes. “Keeping the amnesia to yourself is eating you alive. I can see the strain on your face.”

  “I can’t.” It would be the end to my new world. The only one I know.

  “He called me, you know, to check up on your references.” Eyebrows raised in her direction. “You told him you lived in Girard?”

  “It was the first place to pop in my head.” She cleaned the dirt out of one fingernail with another. What else had the two talked about? Was that what brought on the change in his attitude on the phone. “When did you talk with him?”

  “About a week or two ago.”

  The same time the nightly talks started. “You didn’t tell him about...”

  “No. I promised you I wouldn’t. Though, the idea did cross my mind. Especially when he threw questions at me regarding your life in Girard. I was able to deflect most of them by telling him I didn’t know much about your life then.”

  “Thank you.”

  “I think you’re making a horrific mistake, but I can’t force you to tell him.”

  “I will eventually, in my own time.” She flopped back on the couch. If she told him now, she’d destroy her newfound friendship.

  Tired at the circle the conversation kept going in she said, “Enough about me. How’s everything with Ed?” Darcy worried over the relationship. On their last conversation, Jordan informed her that the ex had come back in the picture, claiming he’d been a fool to leave her behind. Jordan seemed happy, but...

  “He’s good.” She glanced down, fidgeting with her tan slacks.

  Glancing around the room, Darcy only now noticed bare spots on the walls where decorative pictures once hung. She jumped to her feet in alarm.

  “Jordan, what’s going on? Where are your pictures?”

  “I was going to call and have you come over, but work’s been crazy, and then you beat me to it.” She ran a finger along the seam of her pants. “I’m moving to Nashville with Ed.” Conflicting emotions shown in her bright blue eyes.

  Seeing the excitement her only family member tried but failed to mask, Darcy gnawed on her lip. “I thought you decided against the move. Isn’t that why you broke up the last time?”

  “I did. It was.” Jordan grasped her hand. “But I love him, and he loves me, that’s why he came back. He needs my support now more than ever.”

  While she admitted Ed sported a good voice and might make a go of being a country singer, she couldn’t help resent him for taking her best friend—her only close friend—away.

  “What about work?”

  “I already have three interviews lined up at medical offices in Nashville. I’m sure I can land a good job. Dr. Sheffield has a friend there, he’s going to speak to him personally.” She took a deep breath. “I know this is sudden, but it feels right. I swear I’ll call you.”

  “Make sure you do.”

  Tears filled her eyes as she hugged Jordan good-bye an hour later. The one person sh
e considered family was deserting her. While she was happy for her friend, Darcy’s own lonely, fake life reared its ugly head. No one knew the real her, the scared, amnesiac girl hiding deep within.

  A shimmer of doubt filtered through. What if she injured herself, or someone else? What if she never remembered her old life? Then again, what if she did and the memories ruined her future on the ranch?

  A fist squeezed tight in her stomach as she drove back to the ranch.

  Walking up the steps to her home, she opened the door, kicked off her boots, and went to shower. The long day wore on her aching muscles. The hot water cascaded over her skin, but didn’t release the tension in her shoulders. The knowledge of having Jordan move away, the one person who knew the truth, left her feeling more alone than when she’d woken up in the hospital.

  As she towel dried her hair and ran fingers through the tangled strands, a knock sounded on the front door. She quickly threw on jeans and a tank top.

  “Hold on.” She dropped her towels in the hamper and hurried out to find Chris standing on her porch.

  “Hey, we’re all going to the Lonesome Steer for drinks. You wanna come with us?”

  She pushed the screen door open for him to enter.

  “Come on. It’ll be fun.”

  Not wanting to be alone, she welcomed the invitation.

  Chapter Seven

  Trent parked his truck next to the wood-paneled honky tonk topped with a steer riding away from the large neon star.

  After exiting, Nick moved the passenger seat forward to let Darcy and Chris out of the back. Her flowery scent filled his nostrils as she stepped down and walked with him through the entrance. He struggled with the need to approach her about the early afternoon events while another side of him longed to feel her body in his arms.

  Needing air not consumed by her, he approached the bar along the back wall. “Hey, Gus, how’s business?”

  The tall, broad man turned. “Nick Matthews? What drags you out this way?” The owner fingered his handlebar moustache. “I heard you’ve been out of town more than in since your parents took up traveling. How they doin’?” He tugged on the ends of his black leather vest.