by Tess Oliver
I shook my head. “No thanks.” I realized as I turned down what was sure to be an awesome cookie that I was kind of nervous. I’d never felt nervous on a date before. Then Jessie walked in and I knew why my stomach had been so jittery. She looked almost unreal. I couldn’t stop staring. “Hi.” It was the only word I could stutter out.
She glanced down at her dress and then smiled up at me. Her auburn hair was swept up off her face and tied in back with a ribbon. She was perfect right down to the extra inch of sole on her left shoe. In the soft light of the room, she looked like something out of a fairy tale. “Do I look alright? Do you think I’ll blend in O.K?” she asked softly.
It took me a minute to catch my breath. “Jessie, you could never blend in.”
She smiled shyly at me. “You look pretty amazing yourself, Nick Crush.”
My feet had been nearly frozen to the spot, but I pushed them forward and took hold of her hand. “Your chariot awaits you, my lady. But I have to warn you, it’s a really ugly chariot.”
Jessie clung to the door handle during the rough ride, and we both kept an eye out for swamp spirits. They seemed to have returned to wherever it was they went when they weren’t tormenting the town.
“I’ve got to warn you, these dances can be sort of cheesy,” I said.
“Do you mean they serve a lot of cheese?”
I laughed. “Sorry, I mean they can be sort of corny.”
She smiled and nodded. “I’m going to assume that doesn’t mean they’ll be serving corn.”
The jeep’s front wheel slammed into a hole. My arm shot out and grabbed Jessie’s shoulder before she smacked the dashboard.
“Then you think it won’t be much fun?” she asked after sitting back against the seat.
“I doubt it will be as exciting as this jeep ride,” I said. I peeked sideways at her. Her long lashes had swept down over her cheeks. A tiny smile line creased the side of her mouth. “I’m just glad I’ll be there with you.”
“Me too,” she said. “I only hope there aren’t any unwanted guests tonight.”
“Do you think he might show? The swamp seemed quiet when we passed.”
“He did promise me he’d stay away. But it might be ridiculous to rely on the promise of a man who made his living robbing banks.”
Just hearing her mention him was sending a streak of jealousy through me. Must have been another trait of his I inherited. I was beginning to know how he felt about Bridger. But at least Bridger wasn’t a ruthless ghost. “Does he visit you a lot?”
She shrugged. “He brought me a kitten. He’d saved it from a hawk. It seems so inconsistent with the horrible stories I’ve heard about him. From the way people around here talk about him, I would have expected him to have taken the kitten from the bird and then eaten it himself. I think some of the stories may be gross exaggerations.”
“The guy did rob banks. And he shot people, including the woman he loved.”
“That was an accident,” Jessie said quickly.
I didn’t reply. The last thing I wanted to do was sound like my jerk of an ancestor. I’d never felt jealous before and I was not loving it. I was going to do whatever it took to win her over. I refused to lose to a dead guy. One thing was for sure, if I saw a hawk fly by with a puppy in its claws, I was going after the sucker.
The school cafeteria was already packed by the time we arrived. Apparently the theme was harvest or fall or something because the mother’s had hung fake leaves and pumpkins from the ceiling lights.
Jessie looked up at the decorations and smiled. “I love it.” The band started up and the loudness made her jump and grab my hand. I squeezed it. A wave of stares and whispers followed us as we made our way to the refreshment table. I picked up a cup of reddish-orange punch. “Want something to drink?”
Jessie peered into the cup and then shook her head.
“Yeah, it’s usually even grosser tasting than it looks.” I looked around. We still seemed to be the center of attention, but some of the kids had migrated to the dance floor. A group of adult chaperones were huddled in the back of the room deep in conversation about something. Several of the women kept craning their necks above the crowd to get a glimpse of Jessie and me as if we were there to cause trouble. Thankfully, Hammersmith was nowhere in sight. He spent most of the dances sneaking up on utility closets and the gym bleachers to catch people in the act of making out.
Tina popped up behind us. “You two are so cute together. Can’t wait to see the freak ripping up the dance floor.” We turned and Jessie instantly took a step back from her. The quarterback, Joe or Jeff, or whatever the guy’s name was came up behind Tina. She glared at me then twisted around, threw her arms around the guy’s thick neck and kissed him. Apparently she thought it would make me jealous. I realized now what true jealousy felt like and I realized that I’d never felt an ounce of it over Tina.
I took hold of Jessie’s hand and led her away from the table and Tina. We sat on one of the benches and watched the others. Suddenly, I wasn’t sure why I’d wanted to come here. I hated these things more than getting a cavity filled. I guess in my mind it was a chance to see Jessie so I grabbed it. Now I wished we were still sitting in her house talking, laughing, and eating molasses cookies.
I looked over at Jessie. She watched the dance floor with what seemed like amazement and a bit of envy. The DJ turned on one of my favorite slow Pearl Jam songs. I put my hand out for Jessie to take. “We’ve got to dance to this. ‘Just Breathe’ is one of my favorites.” Her face turned up to mine and I caught my breath and smiled weakly at the appropriateness of the song title.
She stared down at my palm apprehensively for a moment. Then she placed her hand in mine, and I led her onto the floor. A few people stared down at her shoes and there were a few giggles but Jessie didn’t seem to care and neither did I. I put my hand around her waist and pulled her softly against me. She felt small and slightly frail under my touch. I could have held her against me all night. Our steps were awkward but we moved slowly to the music.
Jessie closed her eyes and pressed her face against my chest. The top of her head just reached my shoulder and I leaned my face down against it. She pressed herself tighter against me. Zedekiah could tie me to trees, torture me, and break every bone in my body. I wasn’t giving this girl up. I’d never felt anything so right in my entire life as holding Jessie in my arms.
Even though the music had sped up, we continued with our slow dance. It was as if everyone and everything else around had disappeared. We were alone together, clinging to each other like we were the only people left on earth. Then Dylan slapped me on the shoulder.
“Can I have cuts?” He grinned at Jessie.
I tugged her waist harder against me. “Not a chance. Go find someone else to dance with.”
“Asshole,” Dylan said through gritted teeth. Now his troll-like grin morphed into something more evil. “You know what they’re talking about over there, don’t you?” He motioned with his head toward the group of adults in the back of the room. He smiled again at Jessie. “There’s gonna be a town meeting. The shit that’s been happening around town with the gang and Zedekiah, they think it’s because of her.” Jessie’s fingers tightened on my shirt. Dylan looked straight at Jessie and reached up to touch her, but my arm shot up and blocked him.
Dylan laughed nervously. “Yep, they’re planning to drive your little girlfriend and her crazy, old grandma out of town.” Now he leaned his face toward mine and sneered at me. “They’re planning to get rid of your family too.”
I glared back at him. “You say that like it’s a bad thing.”
Dylan scrunched his nose and stared down at Jessie’s legs. “She’s not that hot anyhow. In fact, Tina’s right. She’s a freak.” He stormed off.
Jessie dropped her hold on my arm, the arm she’d caught just before I’d swung around to flatten Dylan. My jaw tightened and I had to convince myself to not go after Dylan even now.
She sensed my rage. Her
small fingers took hold of my hand, and the tingling sensation I always felt when she touched me traveled up my arm.
My hand tightened around hers. “Let’s get out of here.”
She nodded without a word, and I pulled her through the crowd and out of the building.
We were silent most of the way home. The evening had started out great but had gone sour. I looked over at her. She stared down at her hands in her lap. “Jessie, next time we go out, let’s go where there aren’t any people. Dead ones or live ones.”
Her mouth curled up on the side and all I could think about was kissing that mouth. “Agreed,” she said softly.
By the time we’d reached her house, the jeep sounded like a dying animal taking its last breaths. “I better not turn it off. I’ll never get it to start again. And I’ve got work real early in the morning.”
“It’s probably better if you don’t stay on this mountain too late anyway.” She sounded sad and suddenly I was pissed enough to set the whole damn town on fire. I took her hand and kissed her palm. It wasn’t the kiss I’d been thinking about, but if felt good just to press my mouth against her creamy skin.
“Be careful on the way home.” She slid out of the jeep, and I watched her walk inside.
My fingers gripped the steering wheel in anger. People around here were way beyond ignorant, including the people I’d always hung out with. To hell with all of them. Jessie was all I needed.
I wasn’t halfway down the dirt road when two figures jumped in front of my jeep. My foot instinctively jumped on the brake pedal. Then the figures walked to the sides of the jeep and Butcher leaned his hideous face down to look inside. Crow leaned in the other side. “Nice vehicle. I once had a broken down mare that reminded me a lot of this heap of junk. I finally shot her in the head to put her out of her misery; you ought to do the same with this thing.” Butcher’s breath filled the cab of the jeep and I came close to puking.
“Get out of my way, you vaporous clouds of crap. Like I said, you can beat me and torture me all you like; I’m not giving her up.”
“Hear that, Crow, he doesn’t mind if we twist him up into a little knot and throw him over a cliff. Now that’s true love.”
Crow laughed. “True love.”
Butcher leaned in closer and I swallowed back the bitter taste in my throat. “We’ve already seen that you can take a whole lot of punishment. That’s why we’re switching our attentions elsewhere.” He yanked his face from the window. “Show him what you got there, Crow.”
Something flew at my head. I snatched it from the air before it sliced into my forehead.
It felt like wood. I turned it over in my palm and stared down at it in the dark. It was a chunk of wood. It was the wooden end of a skateboard, Baxter’s skateboard. I looked down at it speechless for a long time. My stomach tightened into a painful knot and my throat felt as if it was collapsing in on itself. “Damn you assholes to hell.” I slumped back against the seat of the car and closed my eyes thinking about that sweet face I’d just left behind on the hill. And those lips, those incredible lips that I hadn’t had the guts to kiss yet. “You won, Zedekiah, you sonavabitch!” I yelled. “You stay away from Baxter and I’ll stay away from Jessie. And I swear you fucker, if you weren’t already dead, I’d kill you.”
I slammed the jeep into gear and peeled away from Butcher and Crow who were doubled over with hideous laughter. The rest of the ride home was a blur.
My dad was slumped in his chair in front of the T.V. “Did you bring the jeep home safely?”
I threw the keys at his chest. “Nice robe.” I walked straight to my room, slammed the door behind me, and plowed my fist through the wall.
Chapter 18
Nana was fast asleep in her favorite chair. Anna was snuggled under her chin and Jasper snored at her feet. I covered her with the wool throw from the couch.
I walked into the kitchen and grabbed a cookie from the jar. I stared absently out the window nibbling the cookie and thinking about the whole evening. Mom had always told me the more excited you are about something, the more likely you are to be disappointed by it. This was only half true tonight. Every minute with Nick had been wonderful. I could have clung to him on the dance floor all night. But the words of his friend were painful. While my mom had spoken often about leaving Bitterroot Crossing, Nana always looked upset by the thought of it. She’d lived her whole life up here on this mountain. We had created our own perfect world up here. It would be difficult to leave. Besides, we had no money and no place else to go.
A tiny spark of red outside caught my eye. It was the end of a ghostly cigarette. I could see the long, lean silhouette of Zedekiah sitting on the pasture fence. I grabbed my sweater from the hook and went outside.
I wandered up to him. He lifted his head and looked at me from under the brim of his hat. “You look especially pretty tonight. How was the dance?”
I put my hands on my hips. “And just how did you know there was a dance? Unless, of course, you were at my school.”
His shoulders lifted in a nonchalant shrug. ‘Our agreement was that I wouldn’t appear in school.”
“Fine, Mr. Literal. You win.” I breathed in a deep gulp of night air. The fragrance of the mountain changed at night. The musky smells of sun-warmed soil and moss-covered trunks were replaced by the crisp scent of evergreen. “Parts of the night were lovely, parts not so great.” I leaned against the fence and stared down at the lights of Bitterroot Crossing. They were glittering yellow, red and blue like every night. “It’s an ignorant little town down there unfortunately.”
“Did you dance with Nick?”
“Boy, oh boy, Zedekiah Crush when you get your craw stuck with something you really get it stuck. Yes, I danced with him. But I’m sure you already knew that.” I turned back around, held onto the fence, and rested my chin on my hands. The mountainside was black with night and only the dimmest reflection from the lights below. “He’s kind, funny, and incredibly handsome.”
Zedekiah took a long draw on his cigarette. “Guess it runs in the family.”
For a moment I considered telling him what Nick’s horrid friend had told us, but I doubted it would help.
“Zedekiah, you wouldn’t ever do anything to hurt Nick, would you?”
“The last time my jealousy got the better of me it caused me to do something I’ve had to relive everyday for eternity. Besides, the boy is kin. Can’t hurt my own flesh and blood.”
I walked out to the clearing in front of the fence and pretended to dance like a ballerina again, twirling in my own clumsy, lopsided circles. My feet lifted again and I couldn’t suppress a giggle as I spun smoothly around and around. I only wished my arms had still been around Nick as I danced. “You are such a puzzle, Zedekiah. The stories I’ve heard about you have been nothing short of terrifying. Why, there’s even a story that you stabbed your own--”
“Stabbed my own friend with a fork for eating my pie. That’s one of the better ones. The slob choked to death on pie crust. Bridger found him. He shoved a fork in his throat to make it look like murder so he could pin another death on me. I liked a good pie as much as the next guy, but I never killed anyone for a piece.”
I stopped in front of him still floating in air. “But you did kill people?”
He sat quietly for a minute. “We botched up some of our robberies. They ended with gunfire usually.” He lifted his long white hand and stared at it. “No one could outdraw me. So I was always the last man standing. If only Bridger had been faster at the draw. Then I would have been the one dying in the street that day and not my beautiful Rebecca.”
I pointed to the ground. “Do you mind? I’m getting sort of dizzy.” My feet lowered to the ground. “You truly loved her, didn’t you? Just like the stories say.”
He nodded beneath his black hat. “Rebecca was everything to me. I would have done anything for her, even given up robbing banks. But she loved Bridger. She proved that to me by jumping in front of him and catching the bu
llet. My life ended with hers that day, but it didn’t matter. My heart had been blackened. I looked forward to the noose after that.”
He was only the spirit of what he’d once been but I could sense his anguish. It vibrated in the chilled air surrounding him. A terrible sadness swept through me and I turned my attention to the town below and thought about Nick. He’d left here tonight with my heart in his hands and suddenly I realized that true love was the only ingredient in a perfect recipe for heartbreak.
Chapter 19
The police had road blocks across several main streets in town. Apparently the gang had been busy after they’d finished blackmailing me. There were big, blue plastic barrels strewn around the town’s sidewalks, which look like they’d contained some kind of yellowish glue. Most likely they came from the label making factory at the far end of town. The barrels were mostly empty now but the streets, signs, and shop windows had been covered with their gooey contents. It was going to be an expensive mess to clean. I really hated those guys.
I pulled into the lumber yard and shut off my bike. It was still early but lights were on in the office. I had no reason to go in and was happy to avoid seeing anyone. It felt as if I’d been swallowed up in a gray, bottomless hole, and I would never see light again. I had no idea how I was going to stay away from Jessie without going mad.
The morning air was chilled, proving that fall was definitely on its way. The coldness made my swollen hand hurt more. I tucked it under the opposite arm and hurried past the office window. Berta nearly fell out of the door in her quest to intercept me.
“The temperature sure drops quickly this time of year.” She pushed her boobs against her tight sweater apparently convinced that I wanted to see them.
“Yep,” I said and kept walking.
She ran after me and grabbed my arm to stop me.
I turned and showed her my best ‘what the hell do you want’ expression.
“Did you hear what happened in town last night?”