by Orla Bailey
My eyes flicker upwards to my forgotten visitors. Gail is still grinning and Steve, blushing furiously. I’m sure I match him shade for shade. Why are they confronting me with this anyway? There’s no point blackmailing me. It’s already out there for everyone to see.
I try to collect my thoughts and make sure my voice comes out sounding something approaching normal. There’s nothing I can do about the frantic drum tattoo beating on my heart. “Would someone like to explain what’s going on?”
“Gail?” Steve prompts his bemused colleague.
She jumps right in. “We reckoned you wouldn’t be able to make much out of our security images. They’re useless. Believe me that was the best one we had. Steve here saw the bloke but we figured that wouldn’t really help you. What’s he gonna say that would help? He’s about this tall.” She lifts her hand up. “Sandy hair. Average. That accounts for about half the blokes in London.”
I nod. I get that much but I don’t see how knowing that helps me either. “Why are you showing me all this… stuff?” I can’t bear to look at it any more.
Steve leans in. “Don’t be a cow, Gail.” He turns to me. I detect a slight look of sympathy. “My mum buys all this crap.” He waves his hand over the magazine. “It was in the house. I was flicking through it on the … Well, I was flicking through it and I saw him. The same bloke that brought the money in.”
I steel myself and we all peer down to where Steve’s pointing. At the magazine. Steve reaches out and turns the page over and it’s all I can do not to groan. There’s more. A second double-page spread and they’re not done with me yet. There are lots of group photographs with captions underneath. I stand out like a sore thumb – a very red, sore thumb – in several of them.
Then I spot her. Amanda Devereaux. With her perfect blonde bob and her immaculate black ball gown and her purple claws gripping onto some other poor sucker’s arm. She’s standing in a group, several of whom I recognise as being from the Advance Advertising agency. The caption beneath confirms it.
Steve taps the photograph with a long skinny finger. “Him. He’s the one.”
I lean in closer. To my complete amazement, Steve’s finger is bouncing off the head of Ben Gunn. I look at the security print-out in my hand and back at the magazine. I repeat the exercise.
“It is him! It’s Ben Gunn.”
“We thought we weren’t going to be able to help much more than that,” Gail points to the computer print-out. “But when Steve brought that magazine in this morning, we knew we’d hit pay-dirt.” Gail’s grin is an enormous one of triumph.
I have to work to keep my breathing steady although I haven’t had a full out panic attack in quite some time.
“You guys are simply phenomenal,” I tell them. I’m close to tears. They’ve made the connection.
“Speedy and sure,” Steve says, looking pleased with himself.
“Company slogan,” Gail explains, rolling her eyes. She turns to her friend. “Come off it Steve. If you weren’t the sort of mink that read mags, sitting on the bog all night, you’d never have found him.”
Steve blushes even more and glances up at me from under his floppy fringe of hair. I shrug. I don’t care what his personal habits are. Right now I could hug the guy.
I lean back in my chair in relief. Never have I felt quite so drained than I do right now, having simply glanced at a few pictures. Or felt so exhilarated. If I can link Gunn to the hotel incident, I can hopefully link Amanda to it. I know it was her that set Gunn up to compromise me in front of the media at the Commerce Ball. When that didn’t have the desired effect and make Jack dump me, she decided to up the ante and get me in that hotel room instead. She’ll stop at nothing to keep Jack and I apart, I’m sure of it.
I can’t help wondering exactly how close Jack and Amanda really are. He’s certainly not readily willing to believe she could be so spiteful. And if they were going to get married once, why didn’t they? What changed? Amanda clearly thinks they have something between them still or what point would there be in getting me out of her way?
It’s not just that I want Jack to despise her, so he’ll pick me. Really it isn’t. I believe she actually poses a threat to me and I have to expose her.
What I’ve found out might not stand up in any court of law but it might be enough to raise a few more doubts and suspicions about her, in Jack’s mind. He says he trusts me but there’s nothing to be lost in giving him a little evidence which call her motives into question so he’s in no doubt whatsoever. At the very least, it might make Amanda realise trying to win him back by hurting me is futile.
And this information is infinitely more than I had yesterday. “Can I keep this stuff?” I ask them.
“Sure.”
“You’ve been so helpful,” I say, digging in my top drawer for the key to my locked filing cabinet. I fetch the petty cash box where I placed a sum of cash yesterday, ready for this very purpose. “I hope you won’t be insulted if I offer you both a reward?”
“Nuh.”
“Not likely,” Gail says.
“You’ve earned every penny.”
I hand them a couple of hundred pounds to share between them and feel it’s money well spent. “Thank you so much, both of you.” I can’t wait to tell Libby what I’ve discovered.
I decide to tell Jack in person. I couldn’t bear it if he still thought I was being hateful and vindictive towards an innocent woman. I still have to prove Amanda is responsible for setting me up and has been doing it all along. It’s more than just my professional reputation at stake. I have a potential future life with Jack to think about now.
Zoe is pacing back and forth outside my office when I show the smiling pair of couriers out.
“Good news?” she asks.
“Great news.” Her expectantly happy face drops when I’m not drawn into giving any more information. She’s beginning to strike me as rather intense but I put it down to wanting to make an impression. I huddle myself away with Libby to tell her what I’ve learned. Zoe interrupts us twice to ask if we want anything done, or if she can make us coffee, but nothing can really upset me now. I’m on a roll.
I photograph all the evidence and save it to a secure file, locking the originals in my filing cabinet with the cash box. I drop the key back into my drawer.
By the time Blackstock collects me at six, I’m exhausted.
Belvedere feels totally void without Jack there. It’s only possible to completely understand the huge impact he has on any space when he’s no longer occupying it. His vibrant energy and imposing personality fill the vastest of emptiness. Is that why my own heart is so desolate when he’s not inside? He belongs there. I’ll never be complete without him.
I half-heartedly eat the food Lenuta has kindly left and try to occupy myself in a variety of ways but end up in bed by ten o’clock as everything seems pointless without him. I’ve carried half the flowers back with me and put them beside the large lonely bed where I lie and stare at them for ages.
I wish he was here with me.
I wake to the phone ringing out of the darkness.
“Hello.” The sleep induced gravel in my voice makes the caller chuckle.
“Did I wake you, kitten?”
“Uh huh.”
Jack lowers his voice to a sexy whisper. “I just wanted to say goodnight.”
I’m alert in a second. “Don’t go. What time is it?”
“Late. And you’re exactly where I want you to be. In my bed.”
“How do you know I’m in your bed?”
“I always know where you are, kitten. I’ll always be able to find you.”
I smile sleepily and wriggle down low into the warmth. “Where else would I be, right?”
“Right.”
“It smells of you.” I inhale deeply, the faint aroma of sleepy Jack, sexy Jack and Clive Christian all mingled and lovely.
“I’ll have to have a word with my house-keeper,” he jokes.
“Don’t you dare.
I love the way you smell. I’m not letting Lenuta anywhere near these sheets until you’re home again.”
“The only thing I need my scent on is you, baby.” His voice deepens until I hear the arousal in his tone. “Are you missing me the way I’m missing you?”
I know immediately what he’s hinting at. The throbbing between my thighs has persisted since Jack’s car pulled away this morning. “Most definitely.”
“So you really haven’t done anything about it?”
“No. I want it to remind me.”
“Good girl.” His voice is gruff, almost angry with need. “Stay that way. For me.”
I close my eyes and imagine him. I indulge all my senses in Jack.
“Thank you for my gift, kitten. It was a nice surprise.”
My eyes shoot open. I hold my breath and my pulse races. “You found them then?” I whisper, remembering.
“More accurately my hotel appointed valet found them. He passed them to me with a very strange expression on his face.”
I’m not sure if Jack is angry or amused. I’m so embarrassed I can hardly speak. What on earth possessed me to do it? I’m actually not saying a word.
“I approve.”
I expel my breath in a sudden rush that makes Jack laugh. “I shall put your little silk panties to very good use, kitten.”
“Jack! I’m waiting for you. Can’t you wait for me?”
“You can ask a man so much and no more. But when I come home I’m going to make you wear them for me. Just them. Nothing else. While I fuck you all night long.
I moan. My sex throbs impatiently. I clamp my thighs together to dampen the insistent reminder and breathe through the torment.
“No touching, tabby cat. That’s all for me.” Even his heated whisper fans the flames building up inside me to bursting point.
“You’re so hard on me, Jack.”
He deliberately misinterprets me. “You have no idea, baby, how hard I am, on you. None. Now go back to sleep. Straight to sleep.” It’s an order.
I sigh. “Thank you for my beautiful flowers. They’re incredible.”
“You’re incredible.”
“Irish and wild.” Am I still talking about the flowers?
“Wild.” He lets the sound of the word roll off his tongue until my skin feels like he’s sucking it. “Wild with wanting you.”
“I love you, Jack.” He’s brainwashing me into complete desperation with all his lustful suggestiveness.
“And I love you. Sweet, sexy dreams, kitten.”
“Goodnight, Jack.”
“Goodnight, baby. Hang up now.”
I hang up the call.
The way he leaves me feeling, the only dreams I’m going to be having are torrid ones filled with heaving, needy, sweat-soaked bodies gliding skin on skin.
And damn it, I can’t get the image of what Jack is doing right now, with the tiny little sexy silk panties I slipped into his suitcase, out of my fevered brain either. He’s a master of the art of sexual torment. When I see him on Friday I’m afraid I’m going to consume him in a blazing inferno before I even give him the chance to say hello.
I think we’re going to be okay.
* * *
My wake-up alarm sounds long before I’ve rested enough. I tossed and turned half the night, dozing sporadically and fantasising, until my body was all set to spontaneously combust. If I didn’t give in to masturbation to relieve this tension it was only due to sheer will-power and Jack’s powerful remote control.
“You are tired,” Lenuta says. She slips me a warmed croissant and a cup of coffee.
“It’s strange sleeping in that big bed all on my own.”
We give each other a knowing glance and laugh. It breaks the tension I’m feeling. I have practically another two days to go before I see Jack again so I might as well get over it.
“Oh, and please don’t trouble to change the sheets, Lenuta. It’s only me until we get back from our weekend away. Monday will be soon enough.”
“And better to smell like he’s just got out for a moment than not got in at all.”
I stare at her as she bustles around the kitchen. Nothing gets past this woman. I adore her. She glances at me. “What? You think I don’t know what is to be with a man?”
“A beautiful woman like you, Lenuta? I’m certain you do.”
“Of course.” She smiles. “In past I have many lovers. Now is only one.”
“The one?”
“Definitely, the one. The best one. A golden key can open any door.”
Where does she get these sayings from? I shake my head in bemusement. The phone trills and Lenuta picks up the kitchen extension from its cradle. As she listens I see her spine stiffen. “I go see.” Her voice is curt and unfriendly, unlike a moment ago with me.
She presses the mute button and turns to me. “Is cat,” she spits. “You want me tell her you have left in car already?”
Amanda? My mouth dries instantly. What the hell is Amanda doing calling me? I really don’t wish to speak to her. She’s bad news and every time I think about her it plays on my insecurities. On the other hand, it’s probably better to know what she’s after than dwell on all manner of possibilities. She might only phone me at work later if I don’t speak to her now. That spiteful witch has clearly called deliberately knowing Jack is out of town. I waver for a second then stand, holding out my hand.
Lenuta hands me the phone and leaves the kitchen with a grim look on her face.
I take a deep breath to steady my voice. Never let your enemy know how much they scare you. “Amanda? Isn’t one apology enough?” I’m still seething that to get Jack talking to me again and living back at Belvedere, I had to bow down before her. But for him, I would have done anything. She clearly doesn’t like that it worked.
“Sweet of you to acknowledge your faults.” I detect the saccharine insult in her tone. My skin crawls with stifled rage and I badly want to throw something.
What the hell does she want now?
Chapter Twelve
“I’m sure you haven’t called to bury the hatchet,” I tell Amanda. Except in the back of my skull. I try to keep my tone neutral.
“Of course not. What would I want to do that for?”
I feel my stomach lurch. Okay. She doesn’t like me and that will never change. She’s made it abundantly clear and the feeling is mutual. But what really disturbs me is how much she sounds like a cat. One that got the cream. She’s positively purring with delight. I brace myself for bad news.
“I haven’t got all day, Amanda. I have a business to run.”
“I’m surprised it’s still standing with all the neglect it gets while you’re chasing other women’s men.”
That’s more like it. A volcano is only dormant until the fire and brimstone starts to spew.
“It’s still standing. So am I. Why are you phoning me?” I’m not going to get into a slanging match with her over Jack. She’s simply not worth it.
“Because Jack’s busy in meetings right now and can’t come to the phone but we think you ought to know how things are progressing between us.”
The fine hairs lift on the back of my neck. “What do you mean?” Jack’s supposed to be in Singapore. My heart plays contact sports with my ribcage. Is he lying to me about going away?
“We’re both extremely comfortable in Singapore. He’s definitely chosen the most luxurious hotel ever for our stay. Probably to make amends for the other night when you sabotaged our little reunion. You should see our suite. Completely fabulous.” She pauses for effect then laughs. “Well, maybe not. You’ve cramped his style long enough. Never mind. Jack is always so thoughtful of my needs. He’s given me Carte Blanche. The spa and restaurants are to die for. He really does adore me. Apart from those dreary meetings he has to attend we haven’t needed to leave our little slice of heaven at all.” Her voice turns from syrup to gravel. “His needs are being well taken care of.” She pauses. “By me.”
I’m glad she can�
�t see me. I’ve collapsed onto a counter stool, shaking like a jelly in an aftershock. A million questions deluge my mind. He’s taken Amanda with him to Singapore? They’re staying in a suite together? She’s taking care of his needs? My brain is foggy but I’m not stupid. She’s making sure I know they’re sleeping together.
The scant control I have over my breathing slips away but I fight to regain equilibrium.
I won’t let her do this to me. Jack asked for my trust and I struggle with every fibre of my being to give it to him. Yet my voice comes out a whisper. “I don’t believe you.”
Her shrill laughter pains my eardrum as I yank the phone to a safe distance.
“Silly child. I told you you’re punching above your weight. You were always going to get hurt. He doesn’t want you. He’s toying with you. When will you listen? He’s punishing you for God knows what. Probably bursting into his boardroom, demanding he ruins his business by associating with a ridiculous little tadpole like CaidCo.” She halts and changes her tone, annunciating every word. “What you want is never going to happen. You’re never going to happen. In the long term Jack Keogh wants me and right now I’m making sure he gets as much of me as he wants. The sooner you accept that and move on, the happier we’ll all be.”
I’m frozen to the spot, my voice gone. It’s a total body shock. All that keeps cycling round my head is the awful fear that she’s telling the truth. That Jack might actually have taken Amanda to Singapore with him. Deceived me. I shallow breathe unable to draw up a single useful lungful. I can’t believe this. He wouldn’t do that to me. I won’t believe her lies again.
“Are you still there?” Her honeyed voice stabs at my silence.
“Yes.”
“Well you shouldn’t be. Get out of our lives. He’ll never give me up. We have things between us you’ll never understand. Stop being such a pathetic little martyr and save yourself the torment. Let him go. If you weren’t such an irritatingly persistent little bitch, I’d pity you.”
I drag every ounce of trust in Jack to the surface of my being.
“I don’t believe you.” I don’t want to. Jack would never take Amanda to Singapore knowing what she’s done to me. Not if he believes me. Or loves me. He knows how I feel about her and he’s asked me to trust him. He wouldn’t do that to me.