Kai looked piqued. “Whether love is bad or forbidden by the code or whatever, it happened with us, damn you. It happened. Why do you think you can make it go away?”
“I thought it was for the best.”
He came closer and took her hands. “Why? Why would you think that? Most women want a connection, a relationship. Most women want to be loved.”
“Most of them want children too, but I don’t. I won’t. I just don’t want the responsibility, and besides that, I’d make an awful mom. I can’t hear. I can’t talk. So even though I adore you, I can’t do that to you.”
Kai was staring at her like she’d grown two heads. “Do what to me?”
“Deprive you of children.”
He shook his head. “Constance, I’m sad about the kids I lost. I’ll always grieve for them, but that doesn’t mean I expect them to be replaced, not by you or anyone else.” She startled as she felt his hand on the side of her arm. His rough fingertips, his soft touch. He brushed back a stray lock of her hair. “It’s not your responsibility to fix what my ex-wife did. I just... Constance. I just want you.”
“Really?” Constance was skeptical. “You really don’t want kids?”
“Did I ever say I did? I have three kids. Here.” He tapped his chest. “Will I ever have more? I don’t know. I don’t care about that as much as I care about you. I love you. I love you. I wouldn’t change a thing about you. Except that I would make you less stubborn and pigheaded.”
Constance laughed weakly. “I might say the same about you,” she signed. “But I love you anyway. I always did.”
She loved him. God, she loved him so much. He tapped her chin, demanding her attention again. “Let’s worry about kids some other time, okay? I don’t believe for a second you wouldn’t be a good mother, but if you don’t want to be a mother, then don’t be. If you want to be a speechwriter, or a fucking entomologist studying bugs...” He grinned down at her, a smile rife with possibilities. “This is your life. What do you want it to be?”
Constance’s lower lip trembled. She squeezed her hands up between them and signed, “I hate bugs.”
Kai chuckled, a little shudder against her. His lips were so close her eyes almost crossed trying to read them. “You know what our problem is, Constance? We’re afraid to accept what’s right here in front of us for fear everything will fuck up again. And I don’t think that’s any way to live. This is your life, not your mother’s. What do you want? Point blank? Fears and anxieties aside?”
She made the three simple signs. “I want you.”
Kai tightened his fingers on her arms, kneading the spot just above her elbows. “Then come back to me. I miss you. And Satya’s come to love you too. If you don’t come back she’ll come over here and kick your ass, I guarantee it. You’re the sister she never had.”
Constance started to laugh but ended up in tears. Her hands shook as she signed. “I want someone to belong to. Someone who loves me just as I am, who wants me just as I am, unconditionally. Who doesn’t use me like my mother, or despise me like my stepdads and stepsiblings, or pay for me like--”
Kai took her frantic hands and stilled them. “I’m not paying for you anymore. I resigned you on those damn papers. I don’t want you as my odalisque. I want you as Constance, my beautiful, caring, sexy, slightly-messed-up woman.”
“You left out stubborn and pigheaded,” she signed.
Kai’s kiss was searing, possessive. Unequivocal. “We tried living by the code,” he said when he pulled away. “Now, how about we just try being in love?”
Chapter Nineteen: In Love
They left that evening with Bastien’s blessing. Kai was sure the agent would never comprehend the depth of emotion Kai and Constance had come to feel for each other. But he understood the gist of it well enough to release Constance from her odalisque duties without prejudice, and embrace her by the door. “You will always have a home here,” Bastien told her.
His farewell to Kai was a little less affectionate. “Keep my Constance happy. Or else.”
Mason joined them on the flight home, and by the time they touched down at LAX, Kai and his longtime friend had made a fragile peace. Kai realized Mason was lost and hurting. He still remembered those black days and weeks after Veronica had left him, and how desperate he’d felt.
Those days were over though. Kai was starting to believe he’d found his way through, and he was sure Mason would find his way eventually. It would just take some time.
They dropped Mason off first, at the Hollywood hotel suite he was renting while his divorce was sorted out. Once they pulled away and got back on the highway, Kai turned to Constance and tilted up her chin.
“I think, when I get you home, I’ll have to spend about five hours working you over. And I can’t promise all of it will be activities you enjoy.”
Constance swallowed. She signed, “Wow. It’s so dark in the car. I couldn’t see what you said just now.”
Kai chuckled. This time he signed the words right in front of her face. “You. Me. Saray. Some of it will feel very, very good. But you were a bad girl too.”
The side of Constance’s mouth quirked up in a rueful smile. “Your signing is getting way too good. Far too good for my taste.”
Back at Kai’s house, there was no chatting, no preliminaries. He led her upstairs and they both undressed. He took her in his arms and they pressed close, skin to skin. She felt different to him already. More relaxed, less defensive. He drew back and grinned down at her.
“Do you want your spanking first, or last?”
“Never,” Constance signed.
“Liar,” Kai signed back. “You love spankings. You just added ten minutes in the corner with nipple clamps on.”
Her look of protest was hilarious, but ineffective in softening his resolve. He knew she didn’t want him soft anyway. Kai scrutinized her, tilting his head. “So, am I still your Master? Even if you aren’t my odalisque?”
Constance thought a moment before she started signing. “If I believe you’re my Master, that’s all that counts.”
“So I just have to work really hard to make you believe.” He headed for the cabinet. “This should be fun.” Kai didn’t know if she caught his last words, but when he turned around with the cuffs in his hand, she looked beautifully apprehensive. He turned her and fastened her wrists behind her back, then led her over to the bed and pulled her over his lap. It was a turn on to put her on the bench, or over the footboard, but sometimes he just wanted the thrill of her squirming on his lap.
Kai started slow, teasing her. He squeezed and caressed her lovely ass as much as he spanked it. Then he increased the intensity slowly, drawing it out, making it last. He loved the feel of her trembling, trying to control herself, then giving up and pulling away. Any such attempts were answered with resounding smacks and a tighter grip on her arms. She was wailing by the end, tears falling on his leg. She didn’t usually cry.
Kai stood her in front of him and reached to wipe away one of the glistening drops. Emotions are dangerous. He rubbed the liquid between his fingers and looked at her. “It’s okay to cry, isn’t it?” he signed. She held his gaze a long moment and nodded. “And you know I love you very much. Don’t you?” She nodded again and leaned forward. He held her, let her rub her tears on his cheek while her tousled hair fell against his face.
He kissed her, hard and deep, tasting the sweetness of her desire. He pulled back and asked, “Do you love me, Constance?”
She didn’t hesitate, but nodded with a tremulous smile. Something in his chest turned over and clenched at the vulnerability in her eyes. He stroked her still-damp cheek. “That’s okay too. Well, come on. Corner time.”
Kai put on the clover clamps she hated and turned her to the wall. He sauntered back to the bed and lay down to watch her, basking in the sight of her feminine figure, her reddened bottom. The trembling in her knees. Her hands occasionally clenched and unclenched in the cuffs that held them fast. Every couple of minut
es she looked back over her shoulder at him. He’d frown and sign for her to keep her eyes in the corner, but he adored her a little more each time her gaze sought him out. It was as if, like him, she was afraid of losing him again through some inattention or carelessness. But they were both too awakened now for that.
At ten minutes on the dot, he crossed to her and turned her around. “Are you feeling mastered yet?” he asked, with a sadistic little tug at the chain between her breasts. The bite of the clamps had her sporting a gorgeous woebegone look, a look that, unfortunately for her, made the dominant in him flare.
His cock pulsed, demanding relief. He pushed her to her knees, fisting his shaft and pressing it to her perfectly formed lips. The chain swung again, side to side, as she struggled for balance. She drew in a breath as he drove his cock into her hot, wet mouth. The warmth and pressure sent shock waves of sensation all the way to the base of his cock and down his inner thighs. It took all his control not to spurt right in the back of her throat.
Constance’s hands strained in their bonds. Her mouth and tongue were all over him, fluttering, caressing, stroking his shaft and his balls. She sucked and licked him so blissfully. He was transported back in time to that first evening they’d met, when she’d fallen to her knees and serviced him without even knowing who he was. Perhaps she had known who he was, or had an inkling who he would become to her. Thinking back, he was certain he’d felt an instant connection too.
Kai drew her head back so she could see his face as he thrust into her throat. “Good girl,” he crooned. “Such a good girl.” He couldn’t last any longer. He pulled out of her mouth and spurted over her chest, marking her for himself. He might share her again one day, might take a chance on another scatter party if they ever got over the trauma of the last one. But even so, she would be his, only his. He would make sure she knew it. He wasn’t in a rental state of mind anymore. He wanted her for life.
Kai laid her down on the bed and rubbed his semen over her breasts, across her chest. Across her heart. She winced as his hand caught in the silver chain. He relented and took the clamps off, stroking and squeezing her breasts as she keened softly through the discomfort. He turned her over and unhooked the cuffs that held her hands behind her back. He kissed each delicate wrist before he turned her over again.
“Rest a moment,” he said. He explored the recesses of the cabinet, returning with a sleek ebony glass plug and Constance’s favorite brand of lube. She was already shaking her head.
“Oh, sweet girl,” he said with tsk. “You don’t have a choice. Did you think you’d seen the last of this lube?”
She signed, “I hoped I’d seen the last of it.”
He took her hands in his and tsked again, and drew them over her head. “Ever the smartass. I think I have something for that.” He nudged her over onto her stomach and placed her hands on either side of her head. He turned her face so she could see him. “Don’t move them. Understand?”
She nodded, her eyes wide.
He toyed with her ass for a bit, forcing her open with his fingers and inserting and withdrawing the plug. Partly to assert his dominance, partly to tease her and turn her on. The trusty heating lube did its work. Constance squirmed and whined, and even disobeyed a few times and reached back to push at his hands in protest. Well, training was part of the process. A very fun part. He simply spanked her sore cheeks and returned her hands to where they belonged. Finally he drove the plug home, seating it deep in her ass.
Kai was rock solid again. He went to the bathroom to wash his hands and distract himself so she had a little time to lie there feeling naughty and punished. When he returned, he might have thought she was sleeping if not for the way she was curling and uncurling her toes.
Kai slipped a hand beneath her and lifted her onto her hands and knees. She’d been such a good girl. It was time for her to have her fun. He ran a hand up her back and kneaded her shoulders. She was pressing her ass against him, the delicious slut. He eased his cock into her cleft inch by inch, savoring the tight squeeze of her pussy. Once fully seated, he withdrew and thrust forward again forcefully, enjoying her little grunt.
He pounded her hard for a while, pressing the base of the plug at the same time to force it deeper in her ass. She was all limp and pliable, letting him have his way with her. He loved the way she trusted him, the way she accepted his dominance over her, answering it with her own sensual charms.
He softened his thrusts then, holding onto the alluring curve of her hips, grinding against her ass. He slipped his fingers down her front, between her smooth, slick pussy lips. He knew she was close to coming, but then he realized he really wanted to see her face. He pulled out, eliciting a moan of despair from her lips.
Kai turned her over with gentle hands. He spread his fingers against her belly, the tips of his pinkies at either hip. She was his. He ran his fingers up over her ribs to her breasts and stroked her nipples lightly. They were still sore and she gave a delightful squeak at the contact. She was thrusting her hips toward him, begging for his cock. He entered her a few centimeters, then pulled out again. In, out, teasing her. She gazed up at him with her patented pleading look.
“I love you,” he said. Constance half beamed and half frowned, brimming with frustration. Kai laughed at the warring expressions on her face. “I know you want me to fuck you.” He slid into her again, a little deeper each time. “I just want you to know I love you also. I should have told you that so many times before.”
She smiled and signed that she loved him too. Her pussy was gripping him and her legs were splayed open, as if she craved more. He gathered her close and slipped his legs under the backs of her thighs, tilting her pelvis up. He drove in all the way, basking in her lustful moans. The toy in her ass rubbed his cock through her walls. From the noises and gyrations she was making, he guessed it felt exceptionally pleasurable to her too.
“Yes, yes,” he murmured against her neck. Yes, I want you. Yes, I want to try again, with someone worthy this time. He leaned back to watch her climb to her apex, to see the intent concentration on her face. His own orgasm was shuddering to life, spurred on by her loveliness, the way she clasped him and arched her hips to perfectly match his thrusts. She threw her head back and he felt her pussy clamp around his cock in rhythmic, erotic completion. The pulses triggered a monumental climax within him. He felt it in his entire body, as if the nerve impulses had raced up his spine and sent the message to every fiber of his being. He collapsed against her, trying not to crush her.
After a few intense moments of spasming release, he came back to his senses and levered himself up on his elbows. He looked down with a smile at the woman in his arms. She was staring up at him in wonder.
“What?” he asked.
“I could hear your heartbeat,” she signed weakly. “I could feel it pounding against my cheek.”
Kai didn’t doubt it--because she made his heart beat so strongly. She spread her fingers on his chest and nudged him. He fell onto his back, stretching in satisfaction, gazing at her in amusement as she knelt beside him and laid her head against his ribs. Her eyes were closed, concentrating, and he knew she was listening the only way she knew how. Through feeling. Through sensation. Her fingers trailed lazily across his skin, up to his shoulder and down his side. She made some little taps then, in time to his heartbeat.
It was so simple, he thought. All those years he’d listened to complex concertos, the crashing, banging, intricate noise. Constance was a new song in his life, a simple, honest song. Tap tap. Tap tap. His heart was hers. “Kai,” she said softly, in her sweet, hesitant way. “Kai…”
God, what music on her lips.
*** *** ***
Constance watched Kai warily as he finished the last of the knots. “All night?” she signed in the confines of her bonds.
“Yes, all night,” Kai answered. “You’re not my odalisque anymore, but you’re still mine. I’ll still like to keep you tied up now and again.” He winked at her. “To deepen
your sense of slavery, of course.”
Constance squirmed. She had a sneaking feeling the plug, too, was going to stay in all night. If only he hadn’t used that confounded lube, she might have actually enjoyed the feeling of fullness while she slept. Maybe if she asked him--
Damn. He was looking at her with that sadistic smirk.
“You are very, very mean to someone who is supposedly your treasured sex slave,” she signed with a pout. “Really very cruel.”
“Yes, I am very mean and cruel person,” he agreed, rolling his eyes. “Now...” He lay beside her, fluffing the pillow under his head. “I would like you to tell me about all these plans you have. These things you want to do that I was apparently going to keep you from doing.”
She flushed. “You’re laughing at me.”
“I most certainly am not. I’m slightly peeved you didn’t tell me about the dreams in that pretty little head of yours. Just like those speeches you hid from me.”
“Oh God,” she signed. “It’s embarrassing to write speeches when you don’t talk. I have to leave the speeches to someone else.”
He shook his head at her. “No. They’re your speeches. Your dreams. Tell me your plans.”
She shrugged. “There’s nothing concrete I have planned. But I’ve always thought I would like to open some kind of home for kids who have nowhere else to go. Runaways. Smart, well-meaning kids who just caught a bad break in life. Kids who need a safe place. A family.”
“Like, some kind of group home?”
“I don’t know. I don’t know anything about it. Maybe...”
She slid him a look. She wanted to ask his help, but she didn’t want him to think she was using him for his money.
“Maybe what?” he prompted.
“Nothing. Well...” Her fingers collapsed, uncertain.
“Maybe you can help me, Kai,” he said, filling in what she couldn’t bring herself to say. “I know you like to help people, and that you have more money than you know what to do with--”
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