by Chant, Zoe
“It’s not selfish to want a better world for your children,” Malachi said softly. He was looking at Hayley. “That’s part of what altruism means. To want to have your kids grow into good people, in a world where people are good to each other.”
Elizabeth stared down at her dinner, then took another bite. She didn’t know how to respond to that.
Because she did want that, she absolutely wanted that. But she’d never believed that a world like that could really exist. She’d known that Victor’s world wasn’t what she wanted, but she hadn’t been naïve enough to believe in some kind of bright utopia as the alternative.
But it almost sounded like Malachi did. In theory, anyway.
“Anyway, everyone chipped in so no one spent that much money on anything,” Hayley said blithely. “So don’t feel like it’s too much to accept. I should’ve told Lachlan to cut it out with the bows and the cellophane and stuff.”
“Lachlan’s unstoppable when it comes to generosity,” Malachi said.
“He’s like the town’s mom,” Hayley said confidentially to Elizabeth. Then she turned to her dad. “Um, should we tell her about the rest?”
Elizabeth put her fork down again. Somehow, even around all of the feelings, half the pasta and all of the fritters had already vanished. “There’s more?”
“Just a couple of things!” Hayley said hastily.
“A few of the women donated some clothes, that’s all,” Malachi said, still in that soothing voice. Elizabeth had a vague idea that she should probably find the tone irritating, as though she were a nervous animal that needed to be quieted.
The problem was, she felt like a nervous animal, and his voice was calming, like a deep, quiet river that she could just relax into, and let carry her along without any danger of startlement.
“Just a few things,” Hayley was saying, looking a little anxious. “Pajamas and a skirt and a shirt and some jeans. Nothing major or new from a store or anything.”
Elizabeth probably should be freaking out again at the thought of people giving her their clothes, but...she was too tired. And she had nothing at all to wear except for yesterday’s suit, anyway.
“Tell them thank you,” she said quietly. “Everyone’s being really generous, and I...” She blinked again; she had to stop crying everywhere like this. “I appreciate it.”
“We will,” Malachi said.
Elizabeth tried to muster her brain into something like action. “And I can help—for real, I can help the town now,” she said. “If you want to know anything about the pack, about Victor’s resources, and what he might do while he’s awaiting trial, who might take some initiative without him—”
Like Nevin, she thought, and bit her lip.
“Of course,” Malachi said, sounding a little more businesslike, which was—good. Reassuring. Right? She wanted things to be more businesslike, and not full of all these weird, teary feelings that had been overwhelming her a few minutes ago.
Right. This was what she wanted.
“But,” Malachi continued, “not right now, because right now you need to rest and recover. I’m sure Reid wouldn’t want you to be working.”
Elizabeth blinked. “Well—this isn’t really work, for one thing; I’m not your legal consultant.” Although there was an idea; maybe the town needed someone on tap for any legal issues that might arise if Victor decided to retaliate in that arena? “But also, I can work just fine while sitting in bed. All I need is a laptop.”
“I don’t think that’s what resting means,” Malachi objected.
“Ew, no,” Hayley said. “That would be like staying home sick from school and still doing all my homework. No way.”
Elizabeth had to laugh a little. “I think it’s a little different.”
“No, actually, I think Hayley hit the nail on the head with that one,” Malachi said, sounding amused. “When was the last time you took a real sick day or a vacation day and didn’t work?”
Elizabeth was indignant. “What do you mean? What does that even prove?”
“It proves you’re not a workaholic. Or it would,” Hayley said meaningfully, “if you could answer.”
“Well, that’s easy,” Elizabeth said. “I am a workaholic.”
“You’ll fit right in here, then,” Hayley said, nudging her dad.
He nudged her back. “I take days off.”
“Oh yeah? When?”
“Today!” he said. “I’ve been here all afternoon.”
“Oh yeah,” Hayley said. “So you patrolled this morning and took Elizabeth in to protect her from Victor and probably spent half the afternoon strategizing about how to keep the house secure while she’s here, and that’s totally a day off.”
Malachi stared at her for a long minute. Then he looked away. “I plead the fifth.”
Hayley rolled her eyes at Elizabeth. “You guys are going to get along great.” Her phone vibrated in her pocket, and she pulled it out. “Speaking of which, I’ve got a super-important thing to take care of, so—talk amongst yourselves.” She hopped up and bounced out of the room.
Elizabeth stared after her. “That was quick.”
“She’s got this video game thing she plays online with her friends,” Malachi said. “They have to do it all together at certain times to get—points or something. I don’t understand it very well, I have to admit.”
“I don’t know a thing about online games,” Elizabeth admitted. “Or video games at all, really. I wasn’t allowed them when I was growing up, and I never had time in college or law school.”
“Sounds like you’ve been working hard all your life,” Malachi said, raising his eyebrows.
“I suppose so. But isn’t that what anyone should do? You’ve only got so long, so you have to accomplish as much as you can.” She took another bite. The pasta was almost gone—this was the most she’d eaten in one sitting in the last month, probably.
“I guess that’s one way to look at it,” Malachi said slowly. “I always wanted a bit more balance. But that’s hard to do when you have a full-time job and a kid.”
“Is Hayley’s mom...” Elizabeth trailed off, not sure how to end the sentence. Damn, she hadn’t meant to ask about her. Surely it was rude?
“We got divorced when Hayley was eight. Amanda remarried; she lives in Arizona now.”
“I’m sorry to hear that,” Elizabeth said, although it felt sort of insincere. She wasn’t sure why, though; surely it would be better for the family to all be near each other? “That must be hard for Hayley.”
“Honestly,” Malachi said on a long breath, “and don’t tell Hayley I said this, but I think it’s better for her this way. Amanda has a hard time understanding what Hayley wants for her life, and whenever Hayley visits her...she comes back feeling bad about herself. So I’m glad she’s far away.” He glanced around, looking guilty. “I shouldn’t say that out loud, though.”
It was—cute, his expression. Like a boy who’d done something wrong and was afraid someone had seen. Elizabeth had to smile. “I don’t think it’s wrong to say that. If you love your daughter, you want her to be happy. To not feel bad about herself.”
Malachi sighed. “I suppose. I just wish she could have a good female role model, that’s all. Someone who would listen to her, respect what she wants. I do my best, but I’m not a very good mom.”
Elizabeth laughed a little. “That’s too bad. I’m going to need someone to give me lessons before this baby comes, because I don’t think I’m going to be a very good mom, either.”
She caught her breath after the words came out—she’d started out joking, but ended up more serious than she’d meant to admit.
Malachi sobered, too, looking at her. He took her hand. “You’ve already given up your whole life so that your kid can have a better one. That sounds like a great mom to me, so far.” He smiled a little. “And you’ll pick up changing diapers and kissing boo-boos pretty fast. Everyone does.”
“And remember to listen to what the kid wa
nts, not what I want,” Elizabeth parroted back his earlier words.
Malachi nodded. “I think that’s the most important part of parenting,” he said thoughtfully. “It’s so easy to project your own—not just your wants, but your anxieties. You think about what would be the worst thing to happen to the kid, and you try to prevent that. And it can blind you to what the best thing would be.”
Elizabeth turned that over in her mind. “I don’t think I ever thought about it that way.”
“Safety is my problem,” Malachi confessed. “As law enforcement, I just—sometimes I want to lock Hayley indoors and wrap her in a blanket and cover the blanket in bubble wrap. Some of the things you see—if anything like that happened to Hayley—”
He had to stop and take a deep breath. Elizabeth’s heart ached, to see how strongly this man felt for his daughter.
“But if I gave in to that, if I refused to let her do anything that might be even a little bit dangerous, I’d be messing her life up as surely as if I let her take too many risks,” Malachi continued firmly. “Because someday she’s going to be an adult and she’ll have to take risks, and no one will be there to protect her all the time. And if she doesn’t know how to handle herself when things happen, then she’ll be in just as much danger. She has to learn how to take care of herself, and the only way she can learn is by doing. So I have to hold myself back. And that’s the hardest part of being a parent.”
Elizabeth looked down at her stomach, mostly hidden by the tray. Hi, baby, she thought. I hope I can let you learn like that.
“For everything else, I guess you can ask Lachlan,” Malachi said, and when Elizabeth looked up, a grin was quirking his mouth. “Apparently he’s the town mom.”
Elizabeth started to laugh.
“Is this place—” she tried to get out around semi-hysterical giggles, “is this place—”
“Yes?” Malachi asked, clearly amused, one eyebrow raised.
“—is this place real?” she finally managed to say.
Malachi’s amusement faded, a frown taking its place. “What do you mean?”
She waved a hand. “It doesn’t feel real. It feels like a fairy tale. Isolated shifter town in the mountains, full of dragons and griffins and magical beings, where everyone’s nice and takes care of each other and sends care packages and—” She kept waving her hand, as though that could somehow make him understand what she meant.
But the quizzical frown was still there. “I promise Oak Ridge isn’t a fairy tale,” he said. “We’ve got our share of pettiness and conflict and vice. I’m the sheriff, I should know. We’ve never had a murder here since I’ve lived here, but we’ve definitely had a lot of smaller crime. Theft, fights, domestic assaults—it happens, even in small shifter towns.”
Elizabeth breathed out. “Maybe I’d have to see it to believe it. It just doesn’t seem like real life right now. When I called Lila, I thought maybe I’d stay on her couch for a couple of days until I figured out how to—set up movers to cart my stuff away and move to a different city. But everyone’s acting like I’m just going to stay here indefinitely.” She looked up at him, suddenly concerned. “Don’t let me overstay my welcome, please. I don’t want—I just don’t know what’s appropriate, here.”
He covered her hand with his. She was coming to know the feel of his hands—big and calloused, strong and masculine. Holding all of her concerns, and all of Oak Ridge’s concerns, too. Lots of power in those hands.
“Don’t worry about what’s appropriate,” he said in that deep, quiet voice. “Don’t worry about overstaying your welcome. Don’t worry that it’s not real. It’s not going to melt away. I’m not going to kick you out onto the streets. You can stay here for as long as you need, and I promise you, it won’t be too much.”
Elizabeth wanted to protest that that wasn’t right, that was exactly what she’d meant about this place being a stupid fairy tale kingdom kind of a place. That no one said that kind of thing and meant it, it was impossible.
But she was too tired to argue any longer. Her eyes wanted to close by themselves.
The bed shifted as Malachi stood up, taking the empty tray away with him. “Sleep,” he told her. “We can talk about it more in the morning, if you’re still worried.”
And she couldn’t protest, because sleep was already coming in like a wave. She lay down, and didn’t remember anything but the soft click of the door closing behind him.
Chapter 10: Malachi
Malachi cleaned up the dinner dishes with a heavy heart.
He was glad Elizabeth was here, and that she was resting quietly and she’d had a good dinner and she had clothes and a toothbrush and the basic things she needed. He reminded himself that they were taking good care of her—all of the town, not just him and Hayley.
But he couldn’t get away from the look on her face as she’d said that it all seemed like a fairy tale. This trembling, fragile thing, this expression of—hope wasn’t quite the right word, because it just wasn’t there yet.
This expectation of disappointment. The way she was so sure that it couldn’t be real, because it was all too good to be true.
Malachi closed the dishwasher with maybe a little too much force, and eyed it guiltily, checking for cracks. Okay, good, it seemed fine.
It just made him so angry, that Elizabeth had lived a life that made basic human kindness seem too good to be true. Victor’s pack must have been hell, to leave her so convinced that a gift basket of necessities and some donated old clothes, a guest room, was all too much kindness to bear.
Well, it wasn’t like he hadn’t known that. Of course Victor’s pack had been hell. For women especially, judging by the way they had fled into the first safety they could find. Katie, and Lila, and now Elizabeth.
Well, good. He hoped that as many women as needed sanctuary from Victor came here to Oak Ridge. It wasn’t like they couldn’t stand to have some more people, just like any small town. Lionesses would be a fine addition to their population.
Starting with Elizabeth. He hoped.
She seemed like she was still thinking of Oak Ridge as a temporary waystation on her way to some more permanent situation. But Malachi hoped she changed her mind. They could use someone like her. Intelligent and resourceful and brave, but also thoughtful and kind. Any town would benefit from having her around, but Malachi was selfishly hoping that it would be his.
And she’d be having her baby soon. Oak Ridge—again, like lots of small towns—had the problem of kids growing up and deciding to go live in the outside world, go to college and get better jobs than they could find around here. There weren’t many young people around, settling down and having babies in town.
Although that was changing, he had to admit. With Katie and her baby Noah, and Lila and her two little kids, the population of children in town limits had grown a surprising amount just in the last couple of months.
Still, a few more couldn’t hurt. Couldn’t hurt at all.
The kitchen was clean, the dishwasher was running, and Malachi glared around, as though some chore would appear to be done if he just stared hard enough. He wanted to do something.
Well, there was always one thing he could do.
He turned the police dog magnet on the fridge upside-down, then went upstairs and knocked softly on Hayley’s door.
Then knocked a little harder. “Kiddo?”
“Yeah, what?” came her distracted voice.
He poked his head in. She was sitting on her bed with her laptop, big headphones over her ears. She moved one aside and looked up at him. “What’s up?”
“I’m going to go out on a patrol. You okay here? Elizabeth’s asleep.”
“Fine, Dad, no problem. You really do not understand the concept of a day off.”
Malachi shook his head at her mock-pitying expression. “I just need to get some energy out, that’s all. If I were human I’d probably be going for a run.”
“Sure, you tell yourself that.” Her expression wavered fo
r a second, and she said, “Be careful.”
“I’ll be careful,” he told her, clear and serious. “I turned the magnet, and I’ll turn it back when I get home.”
She nodded once, holding his gaze, then looked back at her laptop, pulling the headphone back over her ear. Malachi closed her door behind him.
There had been a while, after the divorce and Amanda’s move to Arizona, when Hayley had been constantly afraid that something would happen to Malachi on the job. She’d just been nine or so, and had seen a couple of police shows on television that had been too old for her, too much violence, and she’d gotten it fixed in her head that Malachi could get shot and die.
So they’d had a lot of long talks about it, and there’d been a lot of tantrums to deal with, but overall the thing that had worked the best had been honesty. Malachi had told her exactly when he’d get home, and he’d always been home at that time. He’d made sure she knew where and when she’d be staying overnight if he had a night shift, he’d picked her up when he said he would, and eventually, she’d learned that her dad could be depended on to come home.
But she still worried sometimes, and Malachi never wanted to drop the habit of keeping her informed and reassured about where he’d be and when he’d be back. When she’d gotten old enough to stay home alone overnight while he was working, they’d developed the magnet system. The dog magnet would get turned upside-down when he left for the station, and then whenever he got home, he’d turn it back right-side-up. That way Hayley would know that he’d gotten home all right when she came down for breakfast the next morning.
He knew that she still worried sometimes, even if she admitted it less, now that she was sixteen and not nine any longer. Especially since the problems with Victor had started, and the danger had become much more real than it had ever been before.
Real enough that he’d sent her to live with her mom for a little while. She’d protested something fierce, almost thrown a tantrum like she was a little girl again. But Malachi had been absolutely firm, because it was one thing to want her to take her own risks and have her own experiences, and it was another thing to have her around while there was an open war with another shifter clan going on—with the focus on the ownership and freedom of shifter women, no less.