by Parnell Hall
“You and Chief Harper,” Cora said.
“He’s got nothing?”
“Not a damn thing.”
Buddy jumped up, spun in a circle, and ran barking to the front door.
“You expecting someone?” Cora said.
“No. You hear a car in the drive?”
“No.”
“Then no one should be there.”
“Buddy seems to think so.”
“Maybe he’s wrong,” Sherry said.
There came a knock on the door.
“Or maybe he’s right,” Cora said.
“Don’t we have a doorbell?” Sherry said.
“Yes, we do,” Cora said. “It can’t be anyone. If we ignore it, maybe it will go away.”
“Oh, for goodness’ sakes,” Aaron said. “If you girls are just going to snark at each other…”
“Snark?” Cora said.
“You know what I mean. Sit there and keep arguing and I’ll go see who it isn’t.”
Aaron went out and returned a moment later, ushering in the last person Cora expected to see.
Bambi.
The young woman was clearly out of her element. She had stumbled up the driveway in high heels. One shoe was slightly wobbly, which might have indicated the heel was breaking or might have merely reflected the fact that she’d had too much to drink. She swayed unsteadily and fought to keep her balance, while the toy poodle darted in and out around her feet as if she were his best friend ever.
“He’s precious. Can I take him home?”
“Not going to happen,” Cora told her.
Bambi blew the hair out of her eyes in a gesture men undoubtedly found cute and declared, “You don’t like me.”
“Now, there’s a remarkable insight.”
“Of course you don’t,” Bambi said complacently. “I’m with Melvin now. I understand. You still like him. But you can’t have him. So you don’t like me.”
“Well, you’re half-right,” Cora said.
Bambi crinkled her nose. “Huh?”
“Why are you here?”
Bambi pulled a piece of paper out of her purse. “I have a puzzle.”
Cora could not have been more surprised had Bambi whipped out a pistol and begun spraying the room. “You have a puzzle?”
“Hey, just because I’m pretty doesn’t mean I’m not smart. I can do sudoku.”
“I’ll alert the media,” Cora said.
“Are you mocking me? You don’t like me because I’m young and pretty, but that’s no reason to mock me.”
“No, I’m sure there are others,” Cora said. “What’s this about a puzzle?”
“It’s a number puzzle. But it’s not a sudoku.”
Bambi gave the puzzle to Cora.
“Oh, it’s a KenKen. That’s why you can’t do it.”
“I can do a KenKen. You think I can’t add and subtract?”
“I’m sure you can multiply. So why are you here?”
“I didn’t want to wake Melvin up. Melvin’s sleeping.”
“Ah,” Cora said. “Sleeping. At this time of day that’s a euphemism for passed out.”
“Anyway, I could do it just fine if I hadn’t been having a drink.” Bambi cocked her head, tried to keep it from tipping too far to one side. “I’ve been having a drink.”
“Hadn’t noticed,” Cora said.
“So I brought it to you.”
“Hold on. You probably don’t realize it, but you’re not making any sense. Why are you bringing me a puzzle at all?”
“Because I want to know what it means.”
“It doesn’t mean anything. It’s a KenKen. It’s a bunch of numbers.”
“And I want to know what the numbers mean.”
“Why in the world would the numbers mean anything?”
“I don’t know.”
“Oh, for goodness’ sakes,” Sherry said impatiently. “You mind if I jump in here? I haven’t been married to Melvin, so I can still think straight. Bambi, where did you get the KenKen? Why do you think it’s important?”
“Great,” Cora said. “You ask her two questions. We’ll be here all night while she sorts that out. Bambi, where did you get the KenKen?”
“Under the door.”
“Someone slipped it under the door of your room at the motel?”
“That’s right.”
“Just like this? Or was it in something?”
“It was in an envelope.”
“Was the envelope addressed to you?”
“No.”
“Who was it addressed to?”
“Nobody.”
“It didn’t say anything on the envelope?”
“No.”
“Then what makes you think it means something?”
“Because it had this with it.”
Bambi reached in her purse and pulled out a crossword puzzle.
ACROSS
1 Never let go of
5 Masked man
10 Oodles
14 History chapters
15 Disney’s middle name
16 Neck of the woods
17 Online convenience
18 Message, part 1
20 Brain size?
21 Turns tail
22 Ohio city
23 In-tray item
25 Intruded, with “in”
26 Message, part 2
31 Sounds from Santa
32 Wooden shoe
33 Water ____
37 “The Plague” setting
38 Casting need
39 Not fooled by
40 Aardvark snacks
41 CIA agent, in slang
43 RBIs, for instance
44 Message, part 3
46 Keanu Reeves thriller, with “The”
50 Like a Visa balance
51 Language characteristic
52 Out of sorts?
55 Novelist Tan
58 Message, part 4
60 Ophthalmologist’s concern
61 Ship that sailed in quest of the Golden Fleece
62 Holmes or Couric
63 Rope fiber
64 Pro in futures?
65 Edit
66 Häagen-Dazs alternative
DOWN
1 Brown seaweed
2 A Great Lake
3 Jipijapa topper
4 “For shame!”
5 Extremists
6 Like ye shoppe
7 Sally into space?
8 Charlie Brown cry
9 ___Kosh B’Gosh
10 Las Vegas gambler
11 Long-armed ape
12 Prove false
13 Dieter’s lunch
19 Midterm, e.g.
21 Some radios
24 Collar types
25 On the other hand
26 Stop order
27 Traffic blast
28 Zeppo and Gummo’s brother
29 Online publication
30 Part of “Funiculi, Funicula” song refrain
33 Lawgiver, in Hebrew
34 Preceded in time
35 ___-Tass (Russian news agency)
36 Memo
41 Boston Red ___
42 Having round protuberances
44 Arm or leg
45 ___-night doubleheader
46 King with a golden touch
47 Be gaga over
48 Bit of color
49 Chopper’s chopper
52 Man on first?
53 Guitar relative
54 Words with an ante
56 “Well, I declare!”
57 Cowboy affirmatives
59 Barely manage, with “out”
60 My fair lady?
Chapter
30
Bambi was tipsy enough that, it wasn’t hard to perform the sleight of hand that made it look as though Cora and not Sherry had solved the crossword. While Cora kept Bambi occupied with the KenKen, Sherry knocked off the puzzle in the next room. Cora hardly had to vamp at all, though at one point she was so s
low at making a calculation, Bambi tried to grab the pencil.
When Sherry came back, Cora whipped into the office, picked up the crossword puzzle, and read it over.
The theme entry was, “Add them all. What’s the sum? Look in there. Don’t be dumb.”
Wonderful.
What was she supposed to make of that?
Was there anything else in the puzzle that might give a hint?
No, there wasn’t.
No reference to any particular line of the KenKen or any relevance it might have.
Great.
Cora plodded back into the living with the bad news.
“So what does it mean?” Bambi said.
“Not a damn thing,” Cora said, and handed her the puzzle.
Bambi wasn’t as slow as she looked, because she found the theme entry. “ ‘Add them all. What’s the sum? Look in there. Don’t be dumb.’ Wow! It is a clue!”
“Well, it’s not a very helpful one,” Cora said. “ ‘Add them all’ is meaningless.”
“Why? It’s a number puzzle.”
Bambi snatched up the KenKen.
“Yeah. It’s a 6-by-6 KenKen,” Cora said. “Every line will have the numbers 1 through 6. That’s what, ten, fifteen, twenty-one per row. Times six is a hundred twenty-six. Every single KenKen will be exactly the same.”
“That’s pretty stupid,” Bambi said.
Cora looked at Sherry. “Notice my restraint.”
“It only adds up to that because you solved it,” Bambi said. “It wouldn’t add up to that if you didn’t solve it.”
“No. It would add up to zero. Because a KenKen’s not like a sudoku. A sudoku starts with some of the numbers filled in. A KenKen doesn’t start with any numbers.”
“Yes, it does.”
“No, it doesn’t.”
“It does so. It’s full of little numbers.”
“What? Oh, those aren’t the numbers in the squares. Those are the numbers telling what the numbers in the squares should add up to.”
“So?”
“So what?”
“Add ’em up.”
“Why?”
“You got a better idea?”
“I’ve got no idea at all. Of course, nobody gave me this puzzle.”
“I did.”
“You brought it to me. No one sent it to me. It was not intended for me. It was intended for you and he whose name one dare not speak.”
“You talk funny.”
“Right back at you, kid. The point is if this has any meaning for you, you can’t expect me to know what it is.”
“Except you were married to Melvin,” Sherry said cheerfully. “You have a single point of reference.”
“Thank you,” Cora said dryly. “That’s a big help. Anyway, if I add this up, I get … ninety-three. What does the number ninety-three mean?”
“The year she was born?” Sherry suggested.
“You’re not helping,” Cora said.
“The difference in your ages?”
“I’ll throw you out of here.”
Sherry shook her head. “We’re not leaving the two of you alone together. If Bambi were found torn limb from limb, you wouldn’t be able to prove you didn’t do it.”
“Whereas if you were found torn limb from limb—”
“Come on,” Aaron said. “Solve this thing.”
“There’s nothing to solve.”
“I don’t buy that. You’re just saying that because it’s her. If anyone else had brought you the puzzle, you’d have solved it by now.”
“Why, Aaron Grant. Sherry, looks like your hubby just grew a pair.”
“He’s just showing off for Bambi,” Sherry said.
Aaron threw up his hands. “I’ve done it. Now they’re ganging up on me. How about it, girls? Let’s make some sense out of all this. I need the story.”
“Oh, well, when you put it that way,” Cora said. “I wasn’t trying before, but if you need a story … Okay. Say the number’s gotta mean something. What’s ninety-three?”
Bambi, who had been laboriously adding up the numbers in the puzzle, said, “It’s not ninety-three. It’s a hundred and six.”
“Oh, for God’s sake! It’s ninety-three. I added it up.”
“You added it wrong.”
Cora couldn’t believe the girl was arguing with her. “Oh, look here—”
“It is a hundred and six,” Sherry said.
“What!” Cora said.
“Believe it or not. I just did it myself.”
Cora glowered at her niece. “Fine. So it’s a hundred and six. Big deal. What’s a hundred and six?”
“One more than a hundred and five,” Bambi said.
“Gee, thanks,” Cora said. “That clears it up.”
“Well, it’s true,” Bambi said.
“Yeah, it’s true. A hundred and six is one more than a hundred and five. And what’s a hundred and five?”
“Our motel room.”
Chapter
31
“Are you comfortable leaving Aaron with Bambi?” Cora asked as she and Sherry drove out to the Oakwood Motel.
“I wasn’t going to let you go alone.”
“That’s thoughtful of you.”
“It wasn’t thoughtful of me. I don’t trust you not to get in trouble.”
“That isn’t thoughtful?”
“How do you plan to get into the room?”
“I thought we’d drive up to the door and knock.”
“Bambi says no one’s there.”
“You really want to quote Bambi as an authority on anything? So she says no one’s there. Let’s see if she’s right.”
“What if someone opens the door?”
“Then we get in.”
“What if Bambi’s right and the place isn’t rented?”
“Then we rent it.”
“What?”
“You got a credit card, don’t you? Just rent the damn thing.”
“We can’t rent a motel room.”
“Why not?”
“We have a house.”
“So what? You’re a newlywed. You had a fight with your husband.”
“I did not!”
“You think they’re gonna check?”
“I don’t want people going around thinking Aaron and I are fighting.”
“No one’s going around. We’re just renting a room.”
“It better be for another reason.”
“Fine. It’s for another reason.”
“What’s the reason?”
“What?”
“You got a reason for renting the room?”
“Yes.”
“What is it?”
“Because I want one! Good God, you’re the most squeamish accomplice. Becky Baldwin wasn’t this bad.”
“What?”
“When you were on your honeymoon, Becky did some snooping. I thought she was a pain.”
“She’s a lawyer. She wouldn’t let you do outrageous things.”
“You’d be surprised. Ah, here we are.”
Cora drove right by the front desk and pulled into the parking lot. There was no car in front of 106.
“Looks like no one’s there,” Sherry said.
“We’ll verify that.”
Cora pulled up right into the space, stopped the car, and got out. She walked up to 106, banged on the door.
“Do we rent it?” Sherry said.
“Guess so.”
Cora twisted the doorknob.
It clicked open.
Sherry grabbed Cora’s arm. “Don’t go in there!”
“What?”
“I don’t like it. This is where they always find the dead body.”
“Who does?”
“People in movies.”
“This isn’t a movie.”
“You know what I mean. You don’t wanna open that door.”
“The problem is, I do.”
Cora pushed open the door, stepped inside.
Sher
ry hesitated a moment.
Cora grabbed her arm, yanked her in, and slammed the door.
“Hey!”
“Shut up! Keep your voice down! Melvin’s in the next room!”
“Yeah, but—”
“Look!”
Sherry looked where Cora was pointing.
On the floor, in plain sight, was a revolver.
Sherry sucked in her breath. “Is that the murder weapon?”
“Bet you a nickel. It looks like a .45-caliber. From the smell, it’s been fired.”
Sherry reached in her purse, whipped out her cell phone.
“What are you doing?”
“Calling the police.”
Cora snatched the phone. “Oh, no, you’re not.”
“We have to.”
“Why?”
“Why? We just found evidence.”
“How do you know it’s evidence?”
“Don’t get cute with me. It’s evidence, and you know it.”
“Yeah, but you don’t like that. Trust me, you’ll be much happier if you take the position that it isn’t evidence.”
“Cora, this is not a game. This is a murder case, and we have to cooperate with the police.”
“And we will. But we have to be careful how we do it.”
“Why?”
“You haven’t thought this through. If we call the cops, what’s gonna happen?”
“They’re gonna come here, they’re gonna take the evidence, end of story.”
“No, it’s not the end of the story. Then they’re gonna grill Bambi and arrest Melvin. On the grounds they had the murder weapon.”
“But they didn’t.”
“Yes, they did. Look at it from the police’s point of view. Bambi comes and gets us, feeds us a load of crap, practically forces us to search the motel unit. Why? Because she realized Melvin had it, got cold feet, and wanted a way out.”
“That’s really stupid.”
“Well, Bambi isn’t very smart.”
“Come on, Cora, you can’t have it both ways. She can’t be clever enough to plan this, and too stupid to plan it well. That’s the type of thing you always say, only it’s Melvin, so you can’t think straight.”
“I’m thinking straight, damn it. I’m thinking just fine. If you call Chief Harper, you know what he’s gonna do? He’s gonna arrest Melvin. With all the pressure on him to come up with something, he can’t help it. It doesn’t matter if he can make it stick. The fact is, he’ll have to haul him in with the media attention and the whole bit. What will happen then?”
“You’ll throw a party and laugh yourself sick.”
Cora shook her head pityingly. “You’re the one who isn’t thinking. He’ll find himself accused of murder. He’ll hire an attorney.”