“She told me she would wait, but then you talked her into marrying you.” Jace’s lips curled into a snarl. “And then you killed her.”
Stone swallowed and looked away. “You’re right, I did.”
Abi gasped. “What are you two talking about?” she demanded.
Jace looked her way again before he glared back at Stone. “Did you lie to her too? Act like you’re some champion who saved Virginia?” He drummed his clenched fist against his leg. “I’d be very careful, Abi. Virginia was miserable with him, and you will be too. Stone Cold doesn’t care about anyone but himself.” He stalked past them, looking back once to give Abi a disbelieving shake of his head.
Abi’s insides felt cold, and her brain was whirling with questions. She knew Jace had loved Virginia, but had she really promised to wait for him and then fallen for and married Stone two weeks later? And how in the world could Stone feel like he’d killed their friend? Virginia hit black ice and slid off a cliff for heaven’s sake.
Stone touched her arm. “I’ll take you home,” he said quietly, turning and walking back toward his truck.
For possibly the only time in her life, Abi was too confused to know how to say something light and bring Stone’s grin back. Stone got her door and shut it. Then he climbed in and drove back to her house. Her stomach was in knots as she stared at his rigid jawline and the coldness in his gray-blue eyes. Stone Cold. Would he revert back again? One day of heaven and now it was gone. She felt like a little girl who’d been promised Disneyland with nonstop churros and iced lemonade and instead had been locked in a dirty basement with moldy bread and water.
Stone stopped in front of her house a few minutes later, gripping the steering wheel tightly.
“Do you want to go inside and talk?” she asked.
He shook his head shortly.
“Stone.” Abi grasped his arm. “You promised me we’d talk. What is going on?”
He glanced at her, blinked, and looked down at the steering wheel again. “Jace is right. I made Virginia miserable, and I’d do the same thing to you.”
“Stop, Stone. Just stop it. Jace is an idiot who deserted all of us. Let’s talk about this. I want to be with you, and nothing Jace said has changed that.”
Stone clamped his lips together and pushed out a breath through his nose. “Abi, do you know why I married Virginia?”
“Because she was beautiful and sweet, she was having your baby, and you loved her?” Abi missed her friend and regretted that she’d been so jealous of her and Stone being together that she had withdrawn from both of them during their short marriage and the end of Virginia’s life.
“She was beautiful and sweet, but …” He shook his head like he was going to clam up, but at least, he stayed focused on her. “Jace was telling the truth.”
“About what? You didn’t kill Virginia.”
He exhaled, and his eyes seemed to go a shade grayer. “I didn’t push her off the cliff, but I basically drove her there.”
“Oh, Stone.” She wanted to reach out to him, but she didn’t know how to comfort him right now. He was so rigid and cold. He was shutting her out, and she didn’t know if she could pry her way back in.
“Our marriage wasn’t good. We didn’t love each other and we were both miserable.” He clenched the steering wheel. “Jace was right. It wasn’t my place to step in and be the hero. I should’ve tried to support Virginia as a friend, not as a husband and surrogate father to her baby.”
“What are you talking about?” She shrank back. Jace had claimed the baby was his, but she couldn’t believe that. Of course the baby was Stone’s. Virginia had told Abi it was.
Stone didn’t say anything. Finally, Abi asked, “Jace was the one who got Virginia pregnant?”
Stone nodded, his face the picture of misery and regret. “He’d committed to the military, and he left the day she found out she was pregnant.”
So Jace had taken advantage of Virginia and then ditched her. Abi thought she and Virginia had been the best of friends. Obviously she was wrong. Virginia hadn’t trusted her enough to tell her anything. In fact, she’d outright lied to her.
Abi shook her head, still praying this wasn’t true. “No. Virginia loved you. She married you.”
“She and Jace were together several times, but she told me he didn’t want the baby and wasn’t coming back. Maybe he’s telling the truth that he asked her to wait. I don’t know. She begged me to take care of her and the baby, said her dad would kill her if he found out she’d been immoral. I felt so bad for her Abi.” He passed a hand over his face. “I couldn’t tell her no. We went to Vegas two weeks later.”
Abi thought it was honorable, in a twisted sort of way, that Stone had stepped up and taken Jace’s place, had been there for Virginia. But there were so many other ways they could’ve gone about it. Why all the secrecy? Why did Virginia marry Stone if she loved Jace? Abi knew Virginia’s dad was a hard man and Jace must’ve broken her heart in pieces. Also, Virginia was one of the few who knew how good Stone was heart and soul. She didn’t blame her friend for turning to Stone, but in a way, she felt like Stone had been taken advantage of as surely as Virginia had.
“The day she died,” Stone said, almost like now he was talking he had to share all, “she was driving out of control because she was furious at me. She had said, ‘You’re so cold. I should call you Stone Cold. I hate being married to you. The only time you smile is when you talk about the baby or you see Abi.’ Instead of trying to make it better, I got defensive and accused her of still loving Jace. She didn’t deny it. She took off in her car and died.” He faced the steering wheel again, wrapping his fingers around it. “Jace was right that I made her miserable. I can’t do that to you too, Abi.”
“You’re not cold to me, Stone.”
He gave her a weak smile and then stared out the windshield at her front porch.
Abi wanted to reassure him that it wasn’t his fault that Virginia wasn’t happy or that she’d died far too young, but she was still a few steps behind, trying to process the first set of issues. Jace had been a class-one jerk and had not only gotten Virginia pregnant but had also abandoned her and his own child.
Abi looked at the man she loved and thought she knew so well. Stone had picked up the pieces. It was so like him. He’d always been the responsible one, but instead of being grateful that he’d been there for Virginia, irrational anger moved through Abi. How could every one of her closest friends have lied to her? Was she not worthy of their secret? Did they not trust her?
“How could you keep something like this from me?” She finally managed to ask.
Stone’s grip tightened on the wheel, his knuckles turning white. “I swore to Virginia that I would never tell anyone, but she was the one who told everyone I was the father of her baby. Jace was the only other person who knew the truth and he was gone. He’s right, though. I was young and dumb and thought I was being some hero stepping up to take care of my friend’s responsibility.” He shook his head. “But I wasn’t a hero. I was as bad if not worse than Jace. I wanted to be a father to baby Abigail so much, but I was too immature to be a father or a husband.”
Normally, Abi would tell Stone that he was good enough. She’d try to get him out of his funk, but right now, she was too ticked off. “Seven years. Yes, Virginia told me the initial lie, but she has been gone for seven years. I’ve been here for you, been your friend no matter if you were depressed, angry, cold, whatever. I never gave up on you. Yet you’ve never even given us a chance. You’ve kept all this locked away from me for seven years!” Her voice rose as her anger increased. Maybe it was irrational, but she still felt she had a right to know and understand why. “I realize you promised Virginia and appreciate that you would stand by your promise, but would Virginia want you to be miserable and alone like you’ve been?”
Stone pursed his lips. “I don’t know.”
Silence reigned for too long, and Abi shouldn’t have said it but she had to know. “I don�
��t understand why you couldn’t tell me. You know I’d never go blabbing it around. Did you think I wouldn’t understand? That I wouldn’t believe you?”
He looked miserable, but his jaw tightened. He said, “Do you have any clue how hard it was for me not to tell you? How badly I wanted to share and be with you?” He shook his head and looked away. “But I couldn’t do it. So many times I’ve wanted to, but I couldn’t break that promise.”
Abi folded her arms across her chest. The cab of the truck was too hot and stifling her. “I’m … I don’t know what to think, Stone. I love your integrity, that you kept your promise to Virginia, but it hurts because …” She shouldn’t say it, but if they were going to be together she wasn’t going to hide how she truly felt. “While keeping Virginia’s secret, you basically lied to me and proved that you and I can’t have a relationship.”
His head whipped up, and he stared intently at her, but in true Stone fashion, he said nothing.
“I understand why you didn’t tell me, but at the same time, my heart is breaking that you couldn’t have found a way.” She was so confused inside she couldn’t get the words out right. She loved him and loved that he’d stood behind his promise, but deep inside, she wanted to come first to him. That meant he couldn’t keep things from her, especially something as important as this. She pushed out a heavy breath. “I don’t even know how to explain, but I’ve asked you repeatedly to talk to me, to open up. I trusted you, Stone. I thought I loved you!” As soon as the last sentence was out, her heart thumped painfully against her chest. Stone’s eyes were so cold she couldn’t get one glimpse into how he was feeling. She did love him, but he didn’t love or trust her enough. He’d held a piece of himself back from her for this long. Did he truly love her? Everything was a selfish mess in her brain.
He just sat there, staring at her with those gray eyes until she couldn’t stand it one more second. “Say something!”
He shook his head and looked away.
Her voice lowered. Despite the heat in the cab of the truck, she suddenly felt colder than Stone’s gaze. “I’m done, Stone. If you can’t explain to me why, if you can’t talk to me about something this important, I am done.” She drew in a ragged breath and touched his arm, her voice dropping to a begging plea. “Please say something!”
Stone focused in on her and finally murmured, “I’m sorry.”
Abi heard the strangled scream rip from her throat. She knew she yanked the door open and hurtled herself out of his truck and ran to her house, but it was like an out of body experience. She’d ripped herself from Stone, and she didn’t know if anything could heal a wound this gaping.
Chapter Fourteen
Stone somehow made it through the next day, methodically rolling paint onto his dining room walls and trying to ignore the voices shouting in his head. Why hadn’t he talked through everything with Abi and at least tried to explain how torn he’d been, how much he’d always wanted to be with her? How he’d prayed someone else would share the secret so he could be free to love her? She’d given him that chance, but at the same time, had she? She’d been broken by his lack of trust in her. He understood that she was confused and upset that he hadn’t put her first. After Virginia had died, Abi had proven herself time and again to be his best friend. Maybe he should have found a way to tell her the truth. But it still felt like a violation of his integrity. He’d promised Virginia. He understood why Abi was hurt, but he didn’t know how to change any of it.
He shuddered thinking of the hurt and disappointment in her eyes. He didn’t want to make her miserable like he’d made Virginia. Yet Virginia had been miserable because she’d loved Jace so desperately and Stone loved Abi. He couldn’t have changed that. He often wondered if Virginia had not died if they could’ve made their marriage work. Maybe for baby Abigail they could’ve.
It was growing dark outside when his front door banged open. He rarely locked it since the house was such a work in progress. His heart threatened to pound right out of his chest as he listened to the footfalls. The steps sounded loud and angry. Had Abi come for him? If she could forgive him, he would do everything in his power to make her happy. Apologize and never keep anything from her again. Not clam up and be cold. Talk nonstop if that’s what she wanted. He’d share any touchy-feely junk she wanted if she would just never leave him again.
Jace stormed into his dining room. He stopped short when he saw Stone holding the paint roller. Stone was tempted to chuck the roller at him, but he set it on the tray and stood, folding his arms across his chest. “What do you want?”
“You know, Stone, I thought I was over it. I mean I’ve been gone seven years, and the Navy’s been a good life for me. I’m in my second year of medical school, and they’re paying for all of it. I thought I’d buried Virginia and my love for her and I could move on, but seeing you last night made me realize how wrong I was.”
Jace launched himself across the room and started swinging. Stone had never been so happy to have a punch thrown at his head. He took several hard hits as he grabbed Jace around the waist, throwing him to the unfinished wooden floor. Diving on top of him, Stone found immense pleasure in driving his fists into his former friend’s face.
Jace took the barrage of punches like a champ before bucking Stone off and slamming his fist into Stone’s kidney. Stone grunted but drove his elbow back into Jace’s gut. Jace fell back onto the wood floor and lay there for half a second. He growled with rage and came at Stone headfirst like a bull, knocking the wind out of him. They banged into Stone’s freshly painted wall, but Stone didn’t care. He hadn’t felt this alive in years, well, except for when he kissed Abi, but that was a different kind of alive that he may never feel again. He would happily fight Jace until they both had broken bones.
Stone flipped him back over and managed a quick uppercut to his ribs. Jace swung at his head but Stone ducked and hit him in the abdomen, chest, and face, again and again. He could hardly see through the red in his vision. Sure, he’d done a lot wrong with Virginia and Abi, messed up both of their lives, but none of it would’ve happened if Jace hadn’t deserted them all.
“Stop!” Jace yelled. “Stone!”
Stone sat back on the floor, staring at Jace’s battered face. A little shocked that he’d done that.
“Sheesh.” Jace rubbed at his jaw. “I thought I’d be in better shape with the military.”
Stone grunted out a half-laugh and tried to catch a deep breath. “Bachelor firefighter with nothing better to do than workout. They put pictures of me in the calendar.”
Jace rolled his eyes and leaned against the wall, still dragging in gulps of air. “I needed that.” He gestured to him. “The fight.”
“Me too.” Stone nodded and scooted against the wall too, feeling the wet paint sticking to his shirt and hair. He could fix it on his next day off. He had nothing planned on any day off ever again. Not without Abi. He glanced askance at his old friend. “Why’d you come home?”
“My grandma’s funeral.”
Stone flinched. He’d heard Jace’s grandma had passed but still hadn’t expected to see him. Jace hadn’t come for Virginia’s funeral.
“I loved her, all right? I promise I did, man.” Jace guessed his thoughts like he always used to. “I should’ve come. I shouldn’t even have left. I was young and stupid and had this whole life plan, and it felt like her getting pregnant messed it all up.” He blew out a breath and studied where he’d scraped his hand fighting Stone. “She told me she’d wait for me. I could get established in the Navy and then I’d come get her.” He shook his head. “The next thing I knew she’d married you and she wouldn’t respond to my texts or phone calls.”
Stone couldn’t look at him. “I was young and stupid too. She came to me, crying and alone, and I thought I was being some hero, rescuing her, stepping up to take over my friend’s responsibilities and protecting her from her dad’s wrath.” He clenched his fists. “I was a horrible husband to her, cold and distant.”
“Her dad was a jerk,” Jace muttered. They sat there for a few beats then Jace pushed at him with his shoulder. “I probably wouldn’t have been any better of a husband to her.”
Stone looked at him. “Yes, you would’ve because you loved her. I didn’t.”
Jace nodded. “You’ve always loved Abi.”
Stone straightened. “How did you know that?”
“Any idiot could see that.”
“It doesn’t matter.” Stone gritted his teeth. His insides felt cold and lifeless. “I’ve messed it all up now.”
Jace grabbed his arm. “Look. I know we aren’t friends anymore but we have a lot of history, and despite how much I hate you, I actually care.”
Stone’s eyes widened.
“Go find her. If you love her, don’t be an idiot like me and leave her or let her walk away. You don’t know what I would give to have been the one to marry Virginia. We might’ve lived in a hovel and had nothing but each other and our baby girl, but I would trade every rank in the military, every life experience, every other woman I’ve tried to be with to forget about her. I would trade it all to be with Virginia. Don’t waste any more time, man. Go after Abi.”
Stone stared at Jace as he finished his impassioned speech. It hit him like a sledgehammer. He’d had Abi with him the past seven years but not really. He’d held her at arm’s length and missed out on being with the love of his life because of his fears, misguided obligations, and regrets. He’d hid behind his coldness, and he could never get back the time they’d lost, but he could beg her to give him a chance now.
He leapt to his feet and offered Jace a hand up. Jace stood with a groan. “You pack a punch, man.”
Stone smiled. “Thanks for letting me thump you.”
“Ha!” Jace laughed. “I’ll come by tomorrow, and we can try again.”
“Come by anytime you want to fight.” Stone shook his hand then released it and headed for the entryway. He paused and turned around. “Even though I hate you too, thanks for caring.”
Stone Cold Sparks Page 9