“Sure. I’ll meet you back at the apartment in a bit. I have something I need to do before I go home.” His voice sounds deflated and he hangs up without another word. This right here is just another reason that I can’t stand my dad. Once again, he’s causing someone I love pain.
I mean, I’ve always known in my heart that our dad had zero desire to have the responsibility of raising a bunch of crazy boys, but he did always want us to be his best friends. He left the raising to Mom and tried like hell to be the “cool dad.” I don’t know why Ben never saw through his bullshit, but I have a feeling this whole thing has helped open his eyes to the man our dad really is. I’m a little concerned about how Ben will handle it though.
Just as I’m about to pull out of the parking lot, my phone rings and Destry’s face lights up my screen.
“Shit, Dez. I’m sorry. Are you ready or are you still visiting with Mama?”
“I’m ready. Are you still here? Where’s Ben?”
“I’m in the parking lot. I’ll pull up out front,” I reply, ignoring the Ben question. We’ll chat when he gets in the truck.
I flip around and head back toward the front of the hospital, pulling up just as Destry comes out. He jumps in and immediately asks again, “Where’s Ben?”
“He said he had something to do and would meet us back at the apartment. We’re gonna grab a pizza and head over. Did you need to do anything else before we go home?”
“Nah, I’m good. Just worried about Ben. I knew he’d take this the hardest the moment Dad told us what was going on. I think you and I have always seen through Dad’s bullshit, but Ben has always looked up to him, and I think this might be harder for him.”
“I know,” I reply hoarsely.
The rest of the drive is quiet and Ben still isn’t home when we get there.
Dez and I watch a little TV and shoot the shit about how things are going in Boise for him. He talks about football a little but more about his friends and how he’ll miss them when he moves home. I think he initially decided to go to Boise because he wanted to get the hell out of here. Football has never been his passion; he played because Dad wanted him too.
When I ask him details about when exactly he is moving back home, he tries to change the subject. I know he’s avoiding, so I push him a little. Seems he has a friend that needs his help and asked him to stay in Boise through the summer. Since he took a condensed class load this semester, he gets out of school a few weeks before everyone else. According to him, his plan is to come home for a couple weeks to visit and get all of his UC stuff in order for next semester, and then he’ll return to Boise to help out his friend through the summer. He was going to call Mom and tell her this coming weekend, but with her accident, he says he hasn’t decided when to tell her. He swears me to secrecy before changing the subject. It’s his deal. He can tell Mom when he’s ready.
By the time Ben comes home, I’m concerned and the pizza is cold. When he comes through the door, I can tell he’s been drinking and I lose my shit.
“Goddamn it, Ben! You better not have been driving!” I bark at him.
“Shut your cakehole, Eli. I took a cab. We’ll go get my truck tomorrow,” he mumbles as he pushes past me and toward his room.
“Where the hell did you go that served you? We’re only twenty, Ben!” I stop talking when his door slams shut. That went well.
Taking a deep breath, I start toward Ben’s room, but Dez stops me. “Let him be for now, Eli. He’s drunk and you don’t want to have any serious conversations with him tonight.”
We sit silently watching TV for a little longer before I’m exhausted and ready for bed. I tell Dez good night and head to my room. Just as I finish brushing my teeth, my phone pings with an incoming text.
Unknown: You still awake?
Me: Depends. Who is this?
Unknown: Sara.
Me: Then, yes, I’m still awake. ;)
Sara: Such a flirt. I’m on break, so I figured I’d text you and see when you wanted to get together.
I can’t help the stupid grin that breaks out on my face. Boom. This girl has the hots for me.
Me: When’s your next evening off? My schedule is kind of screwy right now with Mom being in the hospital and us not knowing when she’ll come home. I’ll need to be around for that.
Sara: Well, I work tomorrow, and then I have four days off.
Me: Let’s give it a few days so I know Mom is home and okay. They said they’d release her tomorrow. What about, Wednesday?
Sara: Yeah.
Me: All right, I’ll pick you up Wednesday at 7:00 p.m. Wanna text me your address?
Sara: How about you just tell me where to meet you?
Me: Why can’t I pick you up? Are you married or something?
She doesn’t respond for a few minutes, and I’m beginning to worry. I hear Ben shuffling around in his room and figure I better check on him. I don’t know how drunk he actually is. I knock lightly on his door in case he’s sleeping, but when I hear him grunt, I just let myself in.
“Go away, Eli,” he bites out without even lifting his head to look toward the door.
“No can do, brother. Wanna tell me what the hell is happening here? I mean, I know we’re all upset by Dad’s bullshit, but you basically ran out of the hospital like your ass was on fire. What’s going on, Ben?” I argue.
“Look, I don’t want to talk about this right now, or ever actually, but I know you won’t leave me alone until we do this, so here we go,” he bites out before he sits up, throwing his legs over the side of the bed, and takes a deep breath. “Yes, I’m pissed, but I’m more pissed at myself than I am at Dad right now. I should’ve known. I should’ve seen through his bullshit, but I have been so blinded by the ‘coolness’ of our dad and his job that I chose to ignore all the signs.” He leans forward, putting his elbows on his knees, and he runs his hands down his face. “This entire time, since this whole separation and divorce thing happened, I’ve blamed Mom. I blamed her for Dad looking elsewhere for companionship because she treated him like a child. I blamed her because I thought she was weak for allowing this to happen to her family. I blamed her for all of it, Eli.” He stops talking and I watch as he brushes a tear from his face. “Seeing her in that hospital bed almost killed me. And then finding out that our dad, the man I have always looked up too, is nothing more than a fucking womanizing bastard and that his bullshit could have been the cause of us almost losing her, it seriously made me murderous. I had to leave that room because I needed to get my head straight before I said or did something I couldn’t take back.”
I’m stunned speechless. I mean, I’ve always known Ben was a daddy’s boy, but I never in a million years would’ve thought he’d blame our mom for our dad’s cheating.
“Ben, we’re all pissed. Not just you, although I have to say I’m shocked that you actually blamed Mom for Dad being a cheater. How the hell did that even make sense in your brain?” I’m starting to lose my temper, so I stop and take a deep breath, leaning my head back and looking up at the ceiling. “Look, what’s done is done. They are divorced and have both moved on with their lives. We have to let it go. You heard Mom. It’s our decision if we want to forgive him or not. She’s happy, and for me, that’s all that matters. Dad made his bed. Now he can lie in it.”
Ben stares at me for a minute before he replies, “Oh, he’s going to lie in it all right. I’ll make damn sure of that.”
The tone of his voice makes the hair on the back of my neck stand up. His face is hard, emotionless even, and his voice is calm but icy.
I start to ask what he means, but he rolls back onto the bed and says, “Now we’re done. No more questions, Eli. I’m drunk and tired and I just want to sleep.” With that, he rolls over, giving me his back.
I stand staring at him for a minute before I hear a light snore come from him. For him to have passed out that fast, he’s definitely trashed. It must’ve been the booze talking.
When I get back to my room, I n
otice my phone is lit up, making me smile.
Sara: Not married. Just a cautious small-town girl living in the city. Where do you want to meet?
A few minutes later.
Sara: Okay. I have to get back to work. If you still want to get together, let me know where to meet you on Wednesday. :) Have a good night, Eli.
For some reason, I love the idea of her being a small-town girl.
Me: Sorry. Had to step away from my phone. Well, small-town girl, how about we meet at Chinos? Do you like Mexican food?
I know she won’t respond for a while because she’s working, so I just put my phone on the nightstand and go finish getting ready for bed. I’m exhausted.
Just as I’m about to fall asleep, my phone pings.
Sara: Love Mexican food. See you Wednesday, 7:00 p.m. at Chinos. That’s the one on State and 5th, right?
Me: Yes, ma’am. See you then. Good night, beautiful.
Sara: Good night, Eli. ;)
And with Sara on my mind, I fall asleep, dreaming of her in a naughty nurse’s uniform.
THE NEXT COUPLE OF days are a whirlwind of drama. Ben doesn’t mention our conversation and I can only assume he doesn’t remember it. Cord brings Mama home from the hospital, which we’re all so excited about. Destry goes back to Boise, and in latest news, Mom was invited to go to Italy to do some type of culinary training internship she’d applied for. She got the letter while she was still in the hospital and I was there when she opened it. She’s nervous about telling Dez and Ben but I know they’ll jump on board. She seems sad, but excited, if that makes any sense. Something must have happened between her and Cord because he hasn’t been around much the last day or so. I received a text from Mama this afternoon saying she wants me and Ben to come over for dinner tomorrow. This must be the “Surprise! I’m going to Italy” discussion. I’m excited for her but scared too. That’s a long way away.
Tonight is my date with Sara, and I’m nervous as shit. Since we’re going to a casual restaurant, I throw on a pair of clean jeans and a T-shirt and call it good.
I get to Chino’s about fifteen minutes early and get us a table near the windows. I love Chino’s food, but the back of the place has windows that face the mountains, and it’s a gorgeous view. It’s one of the reasons I chose this place for our date.
A few minutes before seven, Sara comes through the front door, and I feel my pants tighten immediately. She’s dressed in those jeans that appear to be painted on, a fitted black T-shirt, and hot pink Chucks. Her hair lays straight over her shoulders, and I immediately want to run my hands through it. I was wrong. She’s not just “girl next door,” she’s beautiful.
I stand when she starts my way, a small smile on her face.
“You look amazing,” I tell her as I pull her chair out for her.
“Thanks. You look presentable,” she says with a wink, and I immediately feel at ease with her.
“Well, I aim to please,” I retort with a smirk. She chuckles and ducks her head to look at the menu.
The waitress brings us each water, asking if we’re ready to order. Sara orders enchiladas and a Corona, and then I order too. When the waitress cards Sara, it brings up the first set of questions.
“Okay, so I know you’re at least twenty-one since you were just served alcohol. How old are you exactly? I mean, I know my Mama said I’m never supposed to ask a woman her age, but I think it’s a good place to start.”
She laughs before responding. “Well, your mom is a smart woman. You shouldn’t ask a lady her age, unless she’s only twenty-three, because it’s not like twenty-three is old.”
I guess I shouldn’t be surprised that she’s older than me. I mean, she’s an RN, which means she has a bachelor’s degree. I would’ve guessed twenty-one, but twenty-three isn’t so bad.
“Now, Mr. Harper, answer your own question,” she states before bringing the Corona bottle to her lips. I’ve never envied an inanimate object before this moment. I watch her take a gulp of the beer, closing her eyes briefly like she’s savoring it. A girl who enjoys beer. Another point for Sara.
“First, let me ask you if you’ve ever dated a younger man?” I lift my eyebrow at her in question, and I catch just the tiniest bit of concern on her face.
“Oh God. Please tell me you’re over eighteen, or I’m going to have to cut this date short,” she jokes.
“Smartass. I’m twenty,” and I watch as surprise lights up her face. “But I’ll be twenty-one later this year.”
“Wow, I’m officially robbing the cradle with this date.” She snorts. She actually snorted, and it was freaking adorable.
What the hell is wrong with me?
“I wouldn’t go that far. It’s not like you’re a cougar or something,” I retort, which makes her full on belly laugh.
“Well, thank God for small favors.” She grins before bringing the bottle to her lips again. I can’t help but stare at her mouth. She stops mid gulp and I lift my eyes to see that she is watching me as I ogle her lips. She swallows and then smiles.
“What’s the matter, Eli? Never seen a woman drink a beer before?” she asks me with a little bit of that sassy attitude I’m beginning to become addicted to.
“Oh, I’ve seen it before, but it’s never been as sexy.” She smiles her tiny smile, and I watch as her cheeks turn a lovely shade of pink. I embarrassed her.
“So, Eli Harper, what do you do? Are you a student, do you work, or do you live in your parents’ basement and play video games all day?”
I let my face fall and look down at my hands. Let’s see how she gets out of this one. I hear her gasp and then watch as she fumbles with her silverware and napkin.
“Oh shit. I’m sorry, Eli. There is nothing wrong with still living with your parents. I mean, you’re only twenty. I was just trying to be funny,” she quickly blurts out.
I laugh and look up, only to be given the dirtiest look ever from that gorgeous face, which makes me laugh harder.
“That was cruel, you ass! I thought I just broke your poor little heart.”
“That’s what you get for assuming I’m not a twenty-year-old freeloading gamer who lives in his parents’ basement.”
We are both laughing when the waitress stops by again to bring out our order.
“In all seriousness, I’m a junior at UC. Pre-law,” I share, thinking maybe she’ll actually be impressed. I get the opposite reaction. She scrunches up her nose and looks as though she smelled something bad.
“Oh, what, now you don’t like lawyers?” I ask with a chuckle.
“Actually, my dad is a lawyer,” she responds with a smile. “I think of lawyers as stuffy old guys, not extremely tall, hot, twenty-year-olds.”
She called me hot.
“Well, I’ll change your view on that one apparently, cause I’m definitely tall.” She rolls her eyes and laughs.
“Have you always wanted to be a lawyer?” she asks, shoveling a fork full of enchilada into her mouth. I love that this girl isn’t afraid to enjoy a beer and some real food while on a date. I’ve had enough of the “I’ll have a salad with no dressing and a sparkling water” type of girl. Actually, I’d never been fond of them in the first place, but they served their purpose.
“No, actually. I just thought it sounded interesting, and so I went with it. To tell you the truth, I don’t really know anything about being a lawyer,” I reply. “Plus, my dad has always pushed me and my brothers to have ‘big income’ jobs. His grandparents were loaded and left us each a trust fund to get us through college comfortably. Our dad is the almighty ruler of the trusts until we turn twenty-one, so he’s always felt as though he gets to dictate what we do.”
She tilts her head to the side and narrows her eyes at me. “Wait, so you just figured, ‘What the hell, I’ll just go to law school and see how it goes?’” When I nod in the affirmative, she starts laughing.
“What about you, smarty pants? Have you always wanted to be a nurse?” I retort, smiling when her face lights up
at the topic.
“Yep. Since the first time I can remember going to the doctor, I’ve always wanted to be a nurse. I had fallen off my bike and split my shin open on a rock. I was terrified to get stitches, but the nurse who took care of me in the emergency room was amazing. She was the one who calmed me, made me feel safe, and basically did everything except put in the stitches. I knew then that I wanted to be a nurse.”
I can’t take my eyes off her face as she talks about it. Nursing really is her passion, and I’m jealous that I don’t have that type of love for something to do with my life. I mean, the only thing I can think of that I’ve ever felt that passionately about was the summer before my senior year when I volunteered to be a camp chaperone at a summer camp for underprivileged children outside of Denver. I loved every aspect of that summer. We swam and hiked, learned all types of survival skills, and had bonfires where we sat around and shared stories about our lives. Some of the kids even shared secrets with me and asked for my opinion on how to deal with things. It was one of the happiest times in my life. But it’s not a full-time, year-round job. It’s a summer gig for teenagers.
I realize I’ve zoned out when Sara clears her throat and lifts her eyebrow in question.
“Sorry, I just spaced out,” I confess. “I think it’s amazing you’ve always known you wanted to be a nurse. I was just trying to think if I could remember anything I loved doing that much.”
“And? Did you come up with something? You looked pretty deep in thought,” she says, with a small groan as she puts a mouthful of beans and rice in her mouth. I chuckle because I’m pretty sure I’ve never seen a woman enjoy her food so much.
“Sorry, I seriously love their food,” she covers her mouth as she talks because it’s still full. I find that I’ve been smiling and laughing a lot in her presence.
“Sort of, I guess. I spent a summer in the mountains helping out with a summer camp for underprivileged kids a few years ago. It was probably one of the most rewarding, but still fun, things I’ve ever done,” I babble and smile at the memories.
Finding Our Forever: (A Defining Moments Novel) Page 4