What is it you would like to do?
It was impossible to consider what she wished for long-term in her life with her selfish past weighing her down. But making things right with Gwynna would allow her to move forward, to change.
And she could be brave enough to do so.
She took one step after another. The tall, wispy grass lining the pathway brushed against her skirts until she reached the sand. She didn’t have to move much closer before Gwynna caught sight of her. The young woman turned to her father. Words were exchanged, Mr. Merrick nodded, then Gwynna headed in Sophia’s direction.
Sophia stopped in the sand a distance away from the others, allowing Gwynna to come to her. She didn’t wish for their conversation to be overheard. This way, if Gwynna did not accept her apology, Sophia could make a quick escape.
“I thought ye’d decided not to come,” Gwynna said, stopping a few paces away from her.
Sophia stared at the sand stretching far across the beach. “Forgive my sudden appearance. I was not planning to attend, and I will leave soon. If I may but speak with you for a moment.” Gwynna motioned for her to continue. “I wished to apologize for my thoughtless words when last we spoke. I didn’t know that you…that you had a brother.”
Gwynna nodded, her tone somber, broken. “Yes, a younger brother. Jago. I was visitin’ his grave the night I came upon ye at the cliffside.”
The pain became even more acute within Sophia’s breaking heart. “I only became aware of him last night, when I learned that my father…” She paused, emotion snagging her voice. “That my father was the cause of his death, as well as five others.”
Gwynna’s amber eyes glinted with tears. Her chin crumpled as she nodded. “Jago’s death be the reason Father doesn’t like me to work as a bal maiden anymore. He be afraid of losin’ I, too.”
Each breath Sophia drew only pained her heart further. All apprehension fled from her mind as she prayed she might make amends.
“Oh, Gwynna. I cannot begin to express how sorry I am, for my words and for my father’s careless actions. I cannot imagine the pain you and your family must have suffered. The pain you must still suffer. I am so sorry my father and I have been the cause.”
Tears spilled down her cheeks, and at once, Gwynna’s arms were around her. Sophia returned her embrace.
“Miss,” Gwynna said, her voice muffled in Sophia’s ear, “ye must know, I don’t hold no grudge against ye.” She pulled back, swiping her hand at the moisture beneath her nose. “Though, I happily accept your apology.”
The tension around Sophia’s chest began to subside, though she still couldn’t comprehend Gwynna’s goodness. “You are a better woman than I, Gwynna.”
They shared a smile before Gwynna rubbed the moisture from her eyes. “Come now. Let’s be finished cryin’ so we can enjoy the party. There be no tears allowed from this point forth.”
She tossed her head toward the group, but Sophia held up her hands in protest. “Oh, no. I couldn’t. The other families here will surely not be as forgiving as you have been. It will be better if I simply take my leave now.”
“There be no one here who wouldn’t be happy to see ye, I’m sure of it.”
She nodded encouragingly, but Sophia glanced over Gwynna’s shoulder with a wary eye. “Your father?”
Gwynna looked over her shoulder. Mr. Merrick stood a good distance away, watching the both of them. She waved, and he returned the gesture. “Father be the one who told me to speak with ye tonight, miss. He ain’t be holdin’ no grudge either.”
Sophia didn’t believe her words, but when Gwynna looped her arm through hers and dragged her forward, she had little choice but to follow.
She kept her head low as they approached the gathering party, fearful of seeing unwelcome judgments in their stares. When they reached Gwynna’s father, however, she dared a glance at his dark, steely eyes.
“Papa,” Gwynna said, standing before him with Sophia at her side, “Miss Rosewall here be worryin’ she ain’t welcome here. But she is, wouldn’t ye say?”
Sophia could hardly think with the man’s intimidating eyes upon her. She wanted to express her sorrow and regret over her choices and her father’s, just as she had with Gwynna, but her mouth refused to move.
They stood in silence, another moment passing by before Mr. Merrick’s features softened. “My daughter is right, Miss Rosewall. Ye be most welcome here. And don’t ye think otherwise.”
Another stone from the weight around Sophia’s shoulders was removed and tossed to the ground. She nodded with gratitude, and Mr. Merrick tipped his cap to her.
Gwynna proceeded to pull Sophia away and lead her around the fire, greeting people one by one and introducing Sophia to those she didn’t know. Of course Gwynna and Mr. Merrick had been correct in their words. Sophia was welcomed and embraced with kindness by all in attendance. Though her nerves were still on edge, she found them lessening little by little as each smile broke down the fears encircling her heart.
After most of the introductions had been made, Gwynna, beckoned by her mother’s call, moved toward the blanket of food. Sophia followed, pausing a moment to view the other guests in attendance.
The Summerfields had already greeted her with warm smiles and were now speaking with a group of children who giggled at Mr. Summerfield’s teasing.
The Kendrickses of Golowduyn Lighthouse had also come that evening and chatted with Lieutenant Edmund Harris, a naval officer stationed on land as he recovered from an injured arm.
“Mrs. Kendricks is worrying over Mr. Oates this evening,” Mr. Kendricks, who had recently retired from the navy, said to Lieutenant Harris. “You know she has a difficult time trusting anyone with Golowduyn. Even me.”
Mrs. Kendricks raised her brow. “I learned to trust the both of you, haven’t I? I’m sure I’ll trust Mr. Oates soon enough.”
Sophia’s eyes traveled around the rest of the group, discovering the Causeys next as they approached her with broad smiles.
“Mrs. Causey, Mr. Causey,” she greeted with a curtsy. “You have returned from London at last.”
“Indeed, we have,” Mrs. Causey said, “and what a pleasure it is to see you here with us.”
Sophia laced her fingers together. “I hope I am not intruding. Gwynna Merrick invited me.”
“No, of course you are more than welcome, Miss Rosewall.” Mrs. Causey rested a hand on her swelling belly.
So she was expecting. With the couple as kind as even the Summerfields, they certainly deserved the happiness they exuded simply being near each other.
“Will your parents be joining us?” Mr. Causey asked, his arm encircling his wife’s waist.
“No, they will remain at the cottage this evening.”
“Oh, yes. My grandmother wrote to us to tell us that you now live at Lowena Cottage.”
Sophia braced herself for the pity that always came after the mention of her new home. To her surprise, Mrs. Causey sighed with an airy smile. “It is such a lovely place. You must find the views of the sea incomparable.”
Sophia nodded enthusiastically, grateful for the opportunity to speak of anything but how others wretchedly viewed her new existence. “Indeed. My bedroom window has the best.”
Mrs. Causey sighed lightheartedly.
“I’m sure you recall my wife’s obsession with the sea, Miss Rosewall,” Mr. Causey said. “While in London, all she could speak of was the ocean. Now we have returned, one would think she could be happy with another topic of conversation.”
Mrs. Causey swatted her husband playfully on the arm.
Sophia’s mood lifted further just watching them. She’d known the two of them since they were all children. The couple seemed every bit in love now as they had been chasing each other around in the sand more than fifteen years ago.
“I certainly can speak of other things,” Mrs. Causey said before turning to Sophia. “Miss Rosewall, have you—Why, Mr. Hawkins! There you are!”
Sophia’s s
tomach lurched, as if a team of horses pulled her forward at a thunderous speed.
Slowly, she turned, facing the gentleman standing directly behind her. His black jacket fit perfectly over his purple waistcoat. He wore no hat, his fair hair being tossed about in the breeze. And his smile. His smile made Sophia’s heart murmur and caused his blue eyes to shimmer, like a swallow’s wing in the sunlight.
How could she have not thought he would be there? As friends with Mrs. Causey, Mr. Hawkins had more of a reason to be at the party that evening than Sophia had.
“It is wonderful to see you again, Mr. Hawkins,” Mrs. Causey said, drawing Sophia’s attention away from staring at him for longer.
Sophia took a step back, allowing their small circle to widen.
“And you, Mrs. Causey.” Mr. Hawkins reached forth, placing a small kiss to her hand before turning to Mr. Causey. “Mr. Causey, a pleasure, as always.”
A look was exchanged, a smile and a nod, but before Sophia could decipher what had passed between the gentlemen, the conversation shifted to her.
“You are acquainted with Miss Rosewall, I’m sure,” Mrs. Causey said.
Mr. Hawkins’s eyes turned to Sophia. “Indeed. What a pleasant surprise to see you here this evening, Miss Rosewall.”
“And you, Mr. Hawkins,” she managed to say without a quivering voice.
His eyes lingered on her, and Sophia fought to keep her mind from dwelling on the moment they’d shared at the picnic, secluded in the midst of the trees, his eyes on her lips, just like now.
“So tell me,” Mr. Hawkins said, turning to the Causeys, “how did you find London? I am sorry to have missed you both when I was last there.”
“Surely you recall Mrs. Causey’s feelings for the city,” Mr. Causey said. “This past month had to have been the longest of my life with her being so cross.”
Mrs. Causey smiled sheepishly. “Yes, I fear my mother did not put me in the brightest of moods, either.”
“Nothing has changed then?” Mr. Hawkins asked.
Mrs. Causey raised her hands helplessly in the air. “We have hope for the future. But for now, things have only slightly improved.”
“Yes,” Mr. Causey jumped in with a light tone, “my mother-in-law will speak with me now, when before she could not even look at me. That is an improvement, indeed.”
“Which is more than I can say about your mother, Mr. Hawkins,” Mrs. Causey said. “For reasons quite unbeknownst to me, the woman avoided me whenever we happened on each other.”
Silence sounded before the three of them broke out into laughter. Sophia watched the exchange with amusement, unaware of what they found so humorous, nor understanding the comments about their seemingly overbearing mothers, but she didn’t mind. She enjoyed the opportunity she had to observe Mr. Hawkins’s smile without unabashedly staring.
“I must admit,” he said with a sigh, “living somewhere besides the smoky streets of London, and away from Mother’s clutches, has been quite refreshing.”
“Is that the reason you chose to relocate to Cornwall?” Mrs. Causey asked.
Sophia’s ears perked. She had wondered the very same. Though, she’d been too concerned with her own life to ever think to ask him the question herself.
“To be frank,” Mr. Hawkins responded, “Cornwall was the one county Mother said she would never visit.” More laughter ensued. “Truthfully, though, I recall you speaking of Cornwall and of the sea with such fondness, I had to see for myself what living here could do for me.”
Mr. Causey turned to Sophia. “You see? My wife. Obsessed with the sea.”
Sophia’s lips curved with delight as Mrs. Causey swatted at him again, but Mr. Causey darted out of the way this time.
“I’m afraid I must agree with your wife, Mr. Causey,” Mr. Hawkins said. “Cornwall is, indeed, the most beautiful of counties. She spoke of finding peace and love here, and I have certainly discovered the same for myself.”
And suddenly, his eyes were on Sophia.
She stiffened. The Causeys exchanged glances. Mr. Hawkins seemed to be the only one unaware of his own words before pink brushed his brow.
“I have discovered a love for the land, I mean,” he spurted out, turning to the sea. “How could one not, with views such as this?”
“It is spectacular,” Mrs. Causey said, though her curious eyes wandered to Sophia.
Sophia turned away, rubbing her forearm as heat flushed through her body.
“Sophia, would ye help me, please?”
Jumping at the chance to flee from the attention, Sophia quickly curtsied to the Causeys then sped toward Gwynna with only a fleeting look at Mr. Hawkins, though she felt his eyes on her long after she’d walked away.
Chapter Fourteen
Frederick could not keep himself from staring at Miss Rosewall for the better part of the evening, and not just because of her beauty. Something had changed within her. She was unsure of herself, hesitant. Humble.
Had this change occurred because she was living at the cottage? Or did it have to do with befriending the Merricks’ daughter?
He watched the two of them together with great curiosity. He was sure Miss Rosewall would never have even considered speaking to a miner’s daughter before. And yet, there she was, not only speaking, but—dare he think it—enjoying herself with her friend.
He continued to observe her as the evening progressed and throughout the meal. Her eyes frequently met his as they sat across the fire from each other. He longed to speak with her, but between his visiting with the Causeys, and Miss Rosewall conversing with Gwynna, no opportunity presented itself.
When dinner was cleaned, talk of games moved throughout the group.
“Shall we have another horse race, my dear?” Mr. Causey called out as a group moved toward the water’s edge.
“No, I won last time more than fairly, Thomas. Besides, I shouldn’t be racing in my condition, you know this.”
Mr. Causey winked at his wife, who placed a hand on her stomach. Frederick was pleased to see how well Cornwall suited his old friend. He was happy for the both of them, having never seen a pair more aptly matched.
Now if he could but find such a match for himself.
Inadvertently, his eyes found their way to Miss Rosewall. She still sat on a log near the fire away from the others, her attention on the group gathering near the shoreline.
Frederick hesitated. He wanted to approach her, to invite her to join him with the others, but guilt lurked over his shoulder. When he’d discovered that Miss Rosewall was at the party, and Miss Kinsey was not, he’d felt nothing but relief. Now he had the chance to spend as much time with Miss Rosewall as his heart desired. But should he not be wishing for that opportunity with Miss Kinsey?
“Sophia, join us!” Gwynna called out from where she joined the others closer to the sea.
Miss Rosewall shook her head, though her eyes remained on them as she rested her chin on her palm, her gloves lying in her lap.
What was keeping her there? And what was keeping Frederick from enjoying her company? He was not so very attached to Miss Kinsey that he could not spend time with another friend. If anything, as a gentleman, he was obligated to ensure Miss Rosewall enjoyed herself that evening, as she evidently needed help to do.
Setting all other hesitations aside, Frederick took a step toward her. “May I convince you to join us, Miss Rosewall?”
She straightened, turning to face him. “Pardon? Oh, no. Thank you, but I do not know what game they are playing.”
“Nor do I, but I’m sure it will be entertaining whichever they choose.”
She pulled in her lips, still hesitant.
“Won’t you join me?” he asked, offering his hand.
She stared at it with wary eyes, as if she were being asked to hurdle a great gap in the land to reach the safety on the other side.
Perhaps that was precisely what he was asking her to do.
Slowly, she set her gloves on the log next to her, then re
ached up, sliding her smooth fingers across his palm. Pleasant chills traveled up his arm.
“If I make a fool of myself, I shall never forgive you,” she said, standing and withdrawing her hand as a smile tugged at her lips.
“That is more than fair,” he responded. They walked together, bringing up the rear of the migrating group. “Has your forehead recovered?”
Confusion knitted her eyebrows together. “From what?”
He gestured to her brow. “Your quarrel with the tree branch. At the picnic.”
Understanding lit her eyes. “Oh, yes. I am quite recovered, thank you.”
They reached the others, a group of nearly fifteen, just as the Causeys began to explain the rules of the chosen game.
“One person will take a turn placing this”—Mrs. Causey waved a stick half the length and width of her arm in the air—“into the sand as the waves pull out. If you do not make it back to the dry sand before the water reaches you, you’ll be out of the game. And if the wave pulls out the stick you placed, you will also lose that round.”
Mr. Causey continued. “Each person will be required to place the stick farther and farther into the sand. The person who places it the farthest without getting touched by the water or the stick washing away, wins. Shall we begin?”
Cheers sounded as the group lined up, the first person stepping forth for his turn, his arm in a sling.
“Go on, Lieutenant Harris!” a girl’s voice shouted out above the others.
Lieutenant Harris looked over his shoulder. “With your encouragement, I’ll be bound to win.” He winked at someone in the crowd, no doubt the girl who’d cheered for him, but Frederick couldn’t see who it was.
“If you take much longer, Harris, I’ll disqualify you myself!” called out a man Frederick had been introduced to that day, Mr. Kendricks. He stood at the end of the line, draping an arm around his wife, a woman with a reserved smile and dark red hair.
“Oh, hush, Kendricks,” Lieutenant Harris crowed. “You all must watch out for this old captain. At sea, he was known as Cunning Kendricks, because he’d win all the games and the girls!”
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