“Can’t stay, gotta pee,” I answer.
“Fair enough,” Cohen nods grabbing my hand, he helps me up. Even though my belly isn’t big enough to weigh me down yet, I still appreciate him steadying me on my feet. Finn slides in on the other side and both of my sexy men hold me between them. Each of them look down at me with so much love in their eyes it almost makes me want to cry.
Damned pregnancy hormones. They’re turning me into a human marshmallow. Next thing you know I’m going to be crying when I watch Pampers commercials. Wait, I already did that last week.
“You know, we could find other ways to enjoy the early morning,” Finn murmurs and the rasp in his voice wakes me up. My arousal roars inside me, letting me know she’s good and awake too.
“Yeah, I’d be happy to stay in if you want to ride my surfboard instead,” Cohen smirks.
“Oh, dude, come on. How can you say that shit with a straight face?” Finn rolls his eyes.
“What?” Cohen’s eyes snap from me to him.
“Ride my surfboard? Seriously? You can’t say shit like that and get rewarded. You can’t fuck him now,” Finn shakes his head and looks at me. “It’ll only encourage him.”
“Don’t do that to me. She was down with what I was saying, weren’t you?”
“It was fine,” I laugh.
“Can we all agree,” Finn holds up his hands, “that it’s not a banana or a surfboard or any of that shit. Just call it what it is.”
“Fine.” Cohen gives Finn a look and then stares down at me, “so, Joss, want to ride my cock?”
“I do,” I laugh and squeeze my legs together. “But I seriously need to go first,” I walk away from the guys and leave them squabbling about what to call their dicks and go into the bathroom. Luckily, even this early in the pregnancy, there’s no such thing as a shy bladder. I empty mine in record time and flush, wash my hands and give myself a quick look in the mirror. I probably have morning breath. I should give my teeth a quick brush.
I grab my toothbrush and my head feels fuzzy. I blink fast as the room moves sideways. What’s happening? My head rushes and I realize the room isn’t moving sideways, I am. I can’t seem to get my balance. My body lurches toward the wall and then I hit it hard, slumping down until I hit the floor. Everything is fuzzy. Everything is — black.
Epilogue
Finn
“You don’t need all the cutesy names for your cock, man. It is what it is,” I tell Cohen. He’s not really paying attention though. He’s doing some kind of stretch and looking at himself in the mirror.
“Whatever. It makes Joss laugh and that’s all I care about. I love that sound,” he answers.
“It is pretty awesome,” I agree.
“Maybe if you weren’t such a stick in the mud you’d laugh every once in a while too,” he glances at me in the mirror.
“If you want to make me laugh, you actually have to be funny,” I shoot back.
“Ouch, straight to the heart,” he puts a hand over his chest and stands up.
Thump!
“What the fuck?” I tilt my head toward the noise and rush out into the hall. Cohen is right behind me and we’re both banging on the bathroom door like a couple of goons trying to break it down.
“Are you okay in there?” Cohen calls out.
“Joss? Was that you?” I chime in.
“Huh?” Her voice is muffled by the door but she also sounds out of it. Like she’s still half-asleep. Or confused. “I’m okay, I, uh, fell.”
“We’re coming in,” I turn the knob and we both swarm her. She’s slumped on the floor like her knees gave out. Cohen and I each grab an arm and bring her out to the livingroom, resting her down on the sofa.
“What happened?” He starts looking into her eyes and running his fingers through her hair. Not to be cute or sexy, he’s looking for a bump.
“I think I might have fainted,” she’s dazed.
“Then we’ve got to get you to the hospital, come on,” I start to lift her up and she seems to snap out of it.
“The hospital? No, I’m fine. I don’t want to sit around there. I probably just lost my balance,” Joss twists her face up.
“We need to make sure you and the baby are okay,” I tenderly touch her belly and all resistance deflates from her.
“Yeah, you’re right, let’s go.”
It’s a bit of chaos while we all get dressed and down into my Westfalia, but within fifteen minutes we’re on our way. Joss doesn’t say much on the drive. None of us do. Cohen looks out the window and Joss keeps staring down.
“It’s probably nothing,” I try to reassure them both. “We’ve just gotta make sure. Due diligence and all that,” I keep talking even though neither of them answer me. In my mind a million different problems run through my mind. What causes fainting anyway? Isn’t that a blood pressure thing? Is her heart alright? Luckily I don’t have to keep torturing myself much longer. I flick on the turn signal and pull up to the hospital. Soon we’re checked in and sitting in the waiting room.
“How are you?” Cohen holds her hands and she nuzzles into his shoulder. I am taking an entirely different approach known as pacing.
“I’ll be fine, I’m a little tired though,” she yawns.
A nurse approaches them and I make my way over to the chairs. “We’re gonna get you an ultrasound and make sure everything looks good,” she tells her in a soft, reassuring tone.
“Lead the way,” I smile.
“I’m sorry, but I can only bring the mother and father,” the nurse nods at Joss and Cohen, still sitting all snuggled up together. Of course the nurse is going to think I’m a third wheel, why wouldn’t she?
“I am the father,” I clear my throat. “He is too,” I nod at Cohen, trying to keep as discreet and hushed as possible, but I can see other patients leaning toward us, trying to listen in.
“Both of you?” She looks from Cohen to me and back again. Finally her eyes rest on Joss who nods at her.
“Both of them,” she answers.
“Sure, whatever,” the nurse sighs, “let’s get going,” she leads us down the hallway and into another. It’s twisty and turny, but eventually we make our way to the room.
Joss climbs onto the bed and lifts her shirt, then grabs each of our hands, “Guys, I’m scared. What if I hurt the baby?”
“You didn’t,” I reassure her. “Don’t even think like that,” I run my hand through her hair.
“We’ve got to keep positive, right?” Cohen gives her hand a squeeze.
“You didn’t hurt the baby. Not that one,” the nurse points to the dark screen and clicks a button on her ultrasound wand. “And not that one. They both look healthy,” she continues, her eyes are glued to the screen.
“Both?” Joss squeaks, “we’re having twins?”
“You didn’t know?” The nurse looks up at her.
“No, I had no idea.” Joss is lit up. Her eyes are sparkling. She’s vibrant.
“Well, with your um, situation,” the nurse waves her hand in Cohen’s and my general direction, “it’s even possible that each man fathered one of the babies.”
“Oh, wow,” Joss breathes. She looks at the screen with tears in her eyes, “That’s amazing.”
“So, is there any reason she would’ve fainted?” Cohen cuts in.
“It’s not uncommon in pregnancy, especially with twins,” the nurse answers.
“But it’s not that the babies have anything wrong?” He presses.
“No, no. Nothing to worry about there. The babies look picture perfect. Looks like the start of a long but healthy pregnancy,” she answers. “Congratulations, Dad. And other Dad,” she looks at me and there’s no judgement in her eyes. She genuinely seems happy for us.
“Thanks,” we answer. All three of us.
“Twins, can you believe it?” Joss wraps her fingers through mine and does the same with Cohen. “I was worried about one baby. How am I going to handle two?”
“You’re going to be
an amazing mother,” I lean forward and touch my forehead to hers, giving her soft lips a quick kiss. “And we’re going to be here every step of the way.”
“That’s right. We’ve still got them outnumbered,” Cohen laughs and gets Joss smiling again. I guess I shouldn’t give him a hard time about whatever he calls his dick. He’s right, if it makes her laugh, what’s the harm. There’s nothing better than seeing her smile.
“We’ll get through it all, together,” I reassure her.
“Let me tell you, twins are a blessing,” the nurse cuts in. “And these babies are going to be blessed too, with so many loving parents to raise them. I can feel the love you have for each other. It’s something special.”
“It is,” Joss pulls us in and we both wrap our arms around her and listen to the heartbeats of our children. Both of them. Our twins. Our family. Our woman.
It’s hard to imagine life gets any better than this.
Epilogue
3 Years Later - Joss
“Mama! Looka-meee!” Kai yells out for me.
“No, mama, don’t looka him. Looka me!” Keanu competes for my attention.
I put my book down and stand up on my beach blanket, making a big show of looking at both of my boys. Cupping my hands around my eyes, I turn to check out how each of them are standing on a surfboard while their fathers hold them steady in shallow water. I grab my phone and snap a few quick pics, not wanting to lose this moment in the blur that is raising babies.
I can’t believe my little guys are two-and-a-half already. They’re getting big so quickly. It won’t be long before I’m watching them surf on those boards. Just like their daddies do. They are already shaping up to be their mini-me’s. Kai has Cohen’s golden hair and his daddy’s signature dimples kissing each of his chubby cheeks. Keanu is my more serious boy, he’s inherited his father’s dark hair and brooding gray eyes. Although on a toddler, his looks are less broody and more adorable. I drop my phone on the blanket and really soak in the moment.
It’s funny the way your heart changes after having kids. Before Kai and Keanu turned my world upside down, the closest I came to feeling like this was when the guys did something romantic. Like when they would scent our apartment with banana pancakes and bacon. The sweet, salty smell would waft around the apartment, gently lifting me from my sleep before they ever had the chance to.
Those breakfasts still make me light up, but nothing comes close to that heart-exploding-out-of-your-chest kinda love that comes when I watch Cohen and Finn with our boys. Sometimes I even tear up a bit and I finally understand why people cry at weddings and stuff like that. My heart might be bigger than most though. I mean, I had enough room in it to love two men. And that was before I had my boys, I smile at how proud my little toddlers are. They’re both standing on the boards, arms out at their sides, their legs locked in position like they’re really riding a big wave into the shore.
“Hey there,” I turn toward the familiar voice and go in for a hug. Benji is carrying a bunch of bags, but he opens his arms and gives me a quick squeeze. “I know you said not to buy them anything, but if I’m going to earn the title of best babysitter ever, I need some back-up,” he lifts the bags and I peer down at them.
“You didn’t have to do that. Trust me, I’ve already packed two baby bags worth of stuff. What on earth did you get them?” I try to sneak a peek inside and Benji opens them up to reveal all kinds of soft, squishy toys, some craft stuff and some board books.
“Oh not much,” he acts like it’s no big deal. “A few things to make the day with their favorite unofficial uncle go better.”
“Aww, you’re spoiling them,” I shake my head.
“Yeah, well, you should probably get used to that,” Benji smiles and I notice again how peaceful he looks now that he moved to the island. His skin has a permanent, healthy glow to it now that he’s getting so much vitamin D from all this sunshine.
Or maybe it’s from all that D he’s getting in general.
“Where’s Marco?” I scan the path to the store.
I’d love to pretend that Benji missed me so much that he left the bleak Ohio winters behind to hang out with me in the tropical heat. It would be a nice ego boost, but the truth is he was fine with our Skype chats a couple times a week. Benji has always been cautious, especially with his heart, so it took several flights and several months before he decided to move in with Marco.
That was just after the twins were born. From the glint in my friend’s eyes and the glow on his cheeks, I’d say that, two and a half years later, it looks like he made the perfect choice.
“He’s teaching a yoga class, I’m picking him up in half an hour.
“Half an hour? We should get the boys ready then,” I walk toward the water as Cohen and Finn guide the boards in toward me. Benji drops his bags on my beach towel and joins me.
“There’s no rush, I’m picking him up down the road. Thirty minutes is plenty of time.”
“Trust me, when it comes to taking my twins anywhere, thirty minutes is nothing. We’ll help you get them all set up in your car with the seats and stuff,” I answer.
“Look Kai,” Finn smiles down at our baby, “you’re doing it.”
“I doing it,” Kai’s chest puffs up with pride.
“Are you sure you’re not a pro?” Cohen asks Keanu, “because you’re doing awesome.”
“Awe-shome!” Keanu gives a little thumbs up and no one can resist the cuteness. We all laugh as the guys in my life join me in the dry sand.
“But it’s time to get you little beach bums outta the sun, okay?” I smile down at my twins and bend down giving them both a big hug. I stand up with one in each arm feeling like I should win first prize at a strong woman competition.
“Hi Benji,” Keanu waves enthusiastically like he’s afraid my best friend won’t see him from a foot away.
“Hey buddy,” Benji answers. “Are you guys ready to have a fun day?”
“Yeah!” Both my kids yell.
Even though it’s like carrying two squirmy and adorable sacks of potatoes, I don’t let them down. Instead I hold them close as we make our way back to the apartment.
I’m going to miss this place. Living right above the shop, on the beach, it’s been a dream. However, three adults and two toddlers living in a cramped apartment has brought me back to reality.
I’ll always look back on our time here fondly. How could I forget a place I barely slept a wink in? Between the babies and the occasional all-nighters I spent doing my job, bookkeeping for the surf shop, I probably have five years of memories from a place we only spent three years in because of how little I actually got to sleep. With the twins, sometimes it’s been difficult, but having two amazing dads helping me raise them got me through the hardest times.
Yes, I’ll miss this place, and I’ll always cherish the memories we made here, but as much as I love the location there are things that I will love about our three-bedroom bungalow even more.
“Here, let me help,” Benji opens the front door for me and Finn takes the surfboards into the shop. Cohen slides Keanu free from my shoulder where he’s already doing the bobbing-head thing.
“I know a couple of guys who need a n-a-p,” I hold Kai in both arms and he snuggles into me.
“Does that mean nap? No nap,” his protest gets cut off by a big yawn that seems to swallow half his face.
“Yeah, I not tired,” his brother chimes in from where he’s slumped on Cohen’s shoulder.
“Okay, we’ll see,” Cohen smiles and we lead them into our cramped room. It doesn’t take long to get the boys changed into dry clothes while Benji and Finn sort out the car seat situation downstairs.
We get my tired little guys down into Benji’s car and all buckled in all while I’m going over last minute stuff with my best friend.
“There’s snacks in this bag,” I point.
“Okay.”
“They’re going to need a… nap,” I whisper the last word.
“Of course.”
“There’s two full changes of clothes in this bag.”
“Got it,” Benji nods.
“And if you need anything, or if they’re getting too fussy or if the terrible twos suddenly kick in, call me.”
“It’s going to be fine, Joss. Don’t worry so much. Marco and I have got this covered. You enjoy your packing day.”
“Oh yeah, so much fun,” I roll my eyes.
“Oh, I dunno. You can find ways to add a little fun into the mix,” he winks at me and I laugh.
True. It will be the first time in a long time that we’ll have the entire apartment to ourselves. The realization hits me that we could get naked anywhere we want in our place today. That’s why I’m willing to move away from the beach and shop for a regular home outside of the city. Privacy.
Ever since the twins took over our bedroom we have turned our living room into the only place we get naked now. The boys are young now so keeping things on the low is pretty easy when they’re in cribs. I never want to face the day that Kai or Keanu manage to get up and escape out into the living room while their parents are in the middle of a naked game of twister. It’s not a conversation any parent wants to have.
No. Doors and locks and a bit more space are all good things for a growing family.
“Okay we’re all set here,” Benji pulls out his phone and checks the time. “And I still have five minutes to pick up Marco.”
“That must be some kind of record. Okay, well, Keanu and Kai,” I lean in the open back door of Benji’s car and chat with my boys. “I want you both to have a really fun day with Benji and be good too, alright?”
“We will, mama,” Kai answers. Keanu nods while giving me a big yawn.
“They might fall asleep in the car,” I stand up, warning Benji.
“Good thing they’ll have a couple of capable, strong men to look after them then,” Finn interrupts my mother hen routine and slides his arm around my waist. “Come on, if you spend the whole day saying goodbye we’ll never get anything done.”
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