by Toni Aleo
She smiles innocently. “Good. What can I do for you?”
“Her sister and my girlfriend, Posey Adler, is about to go back to surgery. Can we see her before that happens?”
She keeps smiling as she types quickly, but when she looks up at me, she says, “No, she’s already being prepped to go back.”
I lean in, grinning the grin that gets Posey to do what I want. “Can I just give her a quick kiss?”
“No,” she says, and I glare. “Only one person at a time, and her mother is back there.”
“Can we trade out?”
“Sure,” she says, and I take Shelli’s phone out of her hand.
“Hey!” she complains, but I ignore her, dialing Elli’s number.
She answers right away. “Yes, honey?”
“Elli, it’s Boon. Can you trade with me, please? I just want to give her a quick kiss, tell her I’m here.”
I’m met with silence for a second. “Okay.”
My heart skips a beat as I hang up, staring at the doors. When they open, Elli comes out with a tear-streaked face, her eyes dull, and her face full of trepidation. Seeing her guts me, but I don’t have time to dwell on that. “Room?”
“Nine.”
I move past her, basically running through the hall until I find Posey’s room. I push open the door, and nurses are moving everywhere. I walk to the bed, and my heart sinks. Posey is lying there, all hooked up, and when I see the tube in her mouth, I can’t control my fear. She looks so bad, and I feel helpless. Tears well in my eyes as I step to the side of the bed, taking her hand in mine. It’s so cold, and I try to warm it up as the tears start to fall down my face. I don’t even remember the last time I cried, but I’m basically sobbing as I kiss the back of her hand and then her palm.
“Lovely, I’m here,” I say against her hand. “It’s okay. I’m here.”
“Sir, we have to take her back.”
I kiss her hand once more. “I love you so much.”
“Sir?”
“Can you tell me what’s going on?”
She shakes her head. “You’ll need to speak to the doctor.”
I kiss Posey’s hand again and stand as they start to roll the bed. I lean down, kissing her forehead. My whole body is aching. I want to trade places with her; I don’t want her to hurt. I walk as far as they let me, and when they wheel her away, I cover my face as a sob rips through my body. I have to be strong. I have to believe everything is fine, but I’m terrified. I love her so much, and I can’t even fathom life without her. I crouch down, taking in a calming breath, but it doesn’t calm me. I need to know what is going on. I need to know if she will be okay.
“Sir, we need you to go back out to the waiting room. We’ll let you know her room number when she gets out of surgery.”
I don’t even look at the nurse. I get up, taking in another deep breath as I wipe my face. I start for the door, and I feel numb. Surely this isn’t happening. But I can’t get the image out of my head. The tubes, how cold she was, how pale she was. I don’t even know what a thyroid is, but I hate hers. It’s an asshole. I push the button to open the doors and head out to find Shelli and Elli. What I don’t expect is to see Shea Adler there too.
His blazing blue eyes fall on me, and I take in a deep breath because I know I am so dead. Elli stands as he does, pressing her hand into Shea’s chest, and his look is murderous. He pushes past her, and Shelli tries to stop him.
“Daddy, this isn’t the time or the place.”
“You did this to her!” he yells, his finger pointed at me, and I don’t know what to do.
Do I run? But then I realize what he said. “I’m sorry? Isn’t this her thyroid’s fault?”
Before I can even react, Shea Adler’s fist connects with my mouth. My head whips back, and I stagger back as he yells, “No, you piece of shit. You knocked her up.”
“Shea! Are you kidding me?” Elli yells, pushing him back. But something isn’t clicking in my head. When I open my eyes, covering my mouth with my hand to catch the blood, Shea is being detained by hospital security, and I’m stunned. Did he just say what I think he did?
Shelli comes to me, paper towels in her hands, and she holds one to my mouth. “Are you okay?”
I push the towel away. “Wait, Posey’s pregnant?”
Her lip wobbles, and she slowly shakes her head. “She was, but it was an ectopic pregnancy that ruptured. That’s why she lost so much blood.”
My whole body goes numb, and there could be any number of reasons why I get light-headed. I did just get the shit knocked out of me by Shea Adler, and Posey has been pregnant and I didn’t even know. I doubt she knew either, and my heart, it aches.
“Is she going to be okay?”
She shrugs sadly. “I don’t know. She lost a lot of blood.”
I close my eyes, crouching down once more, and I don’t try to hide my emotions. I let them all out, sobbing in the middle of the ER. If Julia could see me, she’d see that I’m not emotionally unavailable. Or maybe I was. For her. But for Posey, I feel every single emotion. All I want is to be there with her. I want to protect her. I want to love her.
But I might not get that chance.
Chapter Thirty
Boon
“Why are you still here?”
I don’t look at Shea; I just sit there, taking deep breaths.
“You aren’t welcome here.”
“Shea, quit,” Elli warns. “He’s here for the same reason we are. For Posey.”
“I won’t allow you to be with her. It’s your fault she’s in there,” he accuses, his voice low and dark. “She’ll listen to me. She’ll drop you.”
“Dad, it takes two to have sex. Relax!” Shelli yells. “You’re making a fool of yourself.”
He ignores his daughter, and I feel his hate-filled gaze on me. “If you cared even a bit about her, you’d have used a condom. You know you could have ruined her life, right? She doesn’t need a baby. She doesn’t need you.”
“Shea, that is enough. Quit before I call security on you myself,” Elli warns as I close my eyes. I know anything I say will only make things worse. There is no point. So, I sit here. Waiting. “They are in a relationship.”
“A relationship?” he laughs. “Posey doesn’t do relationships. She’s too smart.”
“Apparently not, since not only has she been dating Boon for months now, but she also got knocked up,” Shelli says. And poor Aiden, he looks so uncomfortable. “You do realize you’re in a relationship, right?”
“Shelli, I don’t need your commentary. I’m speaking to this jackass who thinks he has something going with my daughter.”
“He doesn’t think, Shea. It’s true. They love each other,” Elli stresses, and he gawks at her. “I know that’s tough for you to hear, but our daughters are adults. They make their own choices, and Posey chose him. We have to support her choice.”
“The fuck we do,” he sneers. “This guy is nothing. Not good enough for my daughter.”
I press my lips together. I want to put him in his place, but he’s hurting. He’s scared—we all are. I know how much he loves his children, and if the roles were reversed, I’m sure I’d act the same way. I would be beside myself with fear. He’s loved her way longer than I have. And I’m not discounting my love, it’s huge, but I am strong enough to be patient with this man. Not only do I respect him, but I know how much he means to Posey. He’s not in his right mind. Nor am I. I’m too emotional, too hurt to be able to be respectful. So, I sit, and I take the abuse.
“Look at him. He doesn’t even look the least bit affected. He doesn’t even care. He’s here to keep his fucking job.”
That one stings. I do care. I’m just trying to breathe.
“Shea, for real, man. He’s a good dude. He loves Posey,” Aiden says, and I appreciate my best friend.
“A good dude would have come to me and told me he was dating and in love with my daughter! Instead, I find out when she’s lost so much blood from a
pregnancy he induced.”
“Dad! She opened her legs too.”
I cup my face, leaning on my legs. The tension in this waiting room is so thick, I feel as if I’m choking. Or maybe that’s just my sob.
“I didn’t tell you.” I look up to see Aiden looking at Shea. “I hid it. I hid behind Shelli. I’ve known you my whole life, and I didn’t tell you.”
Shea looks down, shaking his head. “Like you said, I know you. I don’t know this guy.”
“True, but I should have come to you, and you forgave that. You gave me your full blessing to love Shelli. And let’s be honest, I didn’t deserve it. I wasn’t the best to her. But I can promise you, I’ve seen them together. That dude, he is the best and beyond that to Posey. He worships her.” I meet Aiden’s gaze, and I see him exhale. “I know for a fact that he’s beating himself up over this, and he doesn’t need this right now. So please, for Posey’s sake, back the hell off.”
Chills run through me as Shea sits back, still grumbling. I swallow thickly, and I’m unable to speak as silence falls over the room. Each second that passes feels like hours, and I watch the clock, waiting for news. I know she’ll be okay, she has to be, but I’m terrified I might lose her. I already lost our child, a child I hadn’t even realized I would love to have.
We haven’t talked about kids, but the thought makes me giddy. It would be so loved. Between Posey and me, it would have everything it could ever dream of. Then Posey’s family would love it immensely, and surely that would bring my mom around.
It would have been perfect. But now, I sit here as my girl fights for her life.
The doctors didn’t even refer to it as a child, just an infection. And I mean, I get that they are right, it wasn’t a baby yet, but that embryo was Posey and me. It was us—the one thing I love more than anything in this world. I swallow hard as I fall deep into my feelings. I fold my body, pressing my face into my legs as I suck in a deep breath. When I feel a hand running up and down my back, I look between my legs to see a pair of really expensive heels that I assume belong to Elli.
“It’s okay, sweetheart. She’s gonna be all right.”
I almost choke on a whimper and I want to be embarrassed for my overly emotional self, but I know Aiden would never tell anyone about this. Plus, could anyone really blame me for being scared? The love of my life is being cut into. Before a sob can escape, I’m up and out of my seat, leaving the waiting room. I head down the hall to the walkway that overlooks all of Denver. I crouch down, pulling my phone out of my pocket to look at the picture of Posey that I have as my lock screen. She’s walking through Target with a slushy in her hand and a blissful look on her face.
She’s gorgeous.
I want nothing more than to be in Target, arguing about silly shit and buying stuff we don’t need. I want a unicorn slushy. I want to dance with her. I want anything other than to be sitting here, drowning in my tears. I swallow past the lump, and then I’m dialing my mom’s number.
She answers right away. “I didn’t think you’d call me back.”
I choke on my words as the tears rush down my face. “Posey is in surgery. She had an ectopic pregnancy, and it ruptured.”
“Oh, Boon,” she cries. “Where are you? Do you want me to fly in?”
“No, no. I just need you to tell me it’s okay. That she’ll be okay.”
“Yes, it’s okay. Everything is fine. That girl is so strong.”
I cover my face as I nod, crying from my soul. “I feel so helpless.”
“I know, baby. I know you do. I’m so sorry.”
“What if she doesn’t make it out? They said she lost a lot of blood.”
“Boon, don’t think like that. You have to stay positive,” she urges, and I lean my face into the window. “I have no doubts. Everything will be fine, and then you’ll need to spoil her and love her while she heals.”
“You’re right. I need to be strong. I’m just so scared, Mom.”
“I know, baby. I’m scared too. Did you know she was pregnant?”
“No,” I say, shaking my head. “I don’t think she knew either. We thought she was sick from an infection, and usually it has to do with her thyroid.”
“Ah, okay. Thyroids are tricky.”
“I don’t even know what a thyroid is, and I hate it.”
She chuckles lightly. “I know, honey. I’m sorry. Are you sure you don’t want me to come?”
“No, her whole family is here, and all we’re doing is waiting.”
“Will you call me as soon as she’s out?”
“Yeah,” I say softly. And when I hear footsteps, I see Shea coming toward me. “Let me let you go.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yeah, Posey’s dad is here.”
“Oh, okay. Call me back.”
“I will,” I say, hanging up and tucking my phone into my pocket. “If you want to beat on me some more, can we wait? I’m hanging on by a thread.”
He stops beside me, leaning on the window’s ledge. “I’m not going to hit you. I shouldn’t have done that. I’m sorry.”
I stand, leaning on the same ledge with one hand as I wipe my face with my other. “Emotions were high.”
“Still, there is no excuse for my actions. I didn’t even think, which isn’t surprising. The kids and Elli make me crazy.”
I quirk my lips. “I always say pretty girls make me stupid.”
He chuckles darkly. “Yeah, that’s the case for me with Elli. With the kids, I just have to protect them.”
She isn’t my kid, of course, but all I want to do is protect Posey. “I hear you.”
He doesn’t say anything, and I don’t dare either. I just stand there, watching as cars drive by under us. My heart is in my throat, and I don’t even know what to do. Should I walk away? Does he still want to talk to me? I don’t know, but I don’t move.
“Are you two living together?”
“No. I have a house, but I do stay with her at her apartment a lot. She doesn’t like my house since it’s the house I had with my ex-fiancée.”
“Why didn’t that work out?”
“She cheated on me.”
He whistles. “That sucks.”
“It did at the time, but if it hadn’t happened, I wouldn’t have met and fallen hopelessly in love with Posey.”
He looks annoyed at my admission, but he doesn’t say so. Instead, he asks, “How long have you two been together?”
“Nine weeks.”
“That’s not long.”
“I knew the moment I met her that she was special and she was going to change my life.” I look at him then. “I know you think I’m just a hockey player—”
“That was wrong of me. I’m man enough to admit that.” His voice breaks, and he looks away. “I can’t lose my baby.”
I close my eyes as I lean into the window. How can I be positive when he says that?
“The blood loss is what scares me.”
“Me too.”
“She hit her head on the sink. She was bleeding from both ends.”
I squeeze my eyes shut, my stomach turning. “I wish I had been there. I would have protected her.”
“Yeah, maybe then I wouldn’t have clocked ya one.”
I scoff. “I think you would have anyway.”
He laughs. “Probably.” Then he lets out a heavy breath. “Elli said she doesn’t think you guys knew about the baby.”
“We didn’t,” I say, scrubbing my hand along my mouth. “Or, at least, I didn’t.”
He nods. “Would you have stayed?”
A sob escapes my lips. “Yes,” I say, finally meeting his gaze. “I love her, Mr. Adler. There aren’t even words to express how I feel for her.”
He licks his lips. “Would you have married her?”
I wipe my face. “I don’t need a baby to force me into marriage with her. I’d marry her now because I want to.”
“Does she feel the same about you?”
“Yeah,” I say confident
ly. “We make each other really happy.”
“You know she gets sick a lot more than most. It’s not easy. I’ve watched my wife suffer, and it’s rough.”
“It scares me, but I can handle it. I’ll take care of her, like I know you took care of Elli.”
He nods, and I can’t read him. “There is a chance she might not be able to have children after this. Believe me, she doesn’t need children right now, but is that a deal-breaker? Because if so, just go—”
“It’s not. I want kids, but I want her more. We’re young. We don’t need kids yet, biological or otherwise.”
He purses his lips. “I want to hate you.”
“I imagine it would be easy for you to do since you don’t know me.”
“Exactly. So I want to get to know you.”
I meet his gaze, and I nod. “I’d really appreciate that, because I’m not going anywhere.”
He quirks his lip just like my girl does, and when he cups my shoulder, I’ll admit I flinch a bit. “Good to know. She deserves someone who will fight for her.”
“I’m that someone.”
We share a long look, but then we hear a pair of heels approach, and Elli exclaims, “She’s out! They were able to repair her fallopian tube and are confident she can still have children. She is still asleep, but they said we can see her.”
I don’t think I even process what she said; I just start moving.
Because for her words to be true, I have to see it for myself.
Shea and I get to Posey’s room at the same time. A nurse is hanging some bag thingy on a stand, and I don’t care that she is here. I move past Shea and go straight to the side of Posey’s bed. I drop to my knees, taking her hand in mine. She’s sleeping, and thankfully, the tube from her mouth is gone. Shea asks something as he takes her other hand, and I thread my fingers with hers, drinking in her beautiful face. Some of her color is back, but it’s obvious we have a long road ahead of us.
“The surgery only took an hour. We wanted to make sure she could breathe on her own before she had visitors. Everything was textbook. She’s a tough cookie.”
Duh.
I kiss her fingers, running my thumb across her wrist.
“She should be waking up soon.”