After I Fall (Immortal Billionaires Book 1)
Page 11
I swallowed hard as the space between us was closing. “I don’t know what I want most of the time,” I murmured. His fingers locked behind my neck and then crept down my spine as he began lightly kneading them into my shoulder blades. “I think I want…you. Nothing from you. Just to be with you.”
Desire flashed in his eyes and he tugged me closer. His lips smashed down on mine, wet and hungry. I whimpered slightly as his tongue explored mine, like a waltz. The taste of salt and maple syrup filled my mouth. I kissed him back with a passion matching his own. I couldn’t get enough. I wanted more of his flesh.
Last night he took control, but now it was my turn. I didn’t know what was coming over me or who this new person was that I was turning into but it felt amazing. Maybe this was who I was always meant to be and I just needed Ozi to show me.
I came up for air and stepped back. He licked his lips as he admired me. Without any worry or fear who might be watching, I pulled my sweater up over my head and then removed my bra. I let out a sweet shudder as the wind tickled my breasts.
Ozi sat down on the grass and leaned back against his elbows. “Take off the rest.”
The stiff muscle between my legs throbbed at the sight of her bare breasts. The way the slightest breeze hardened her nipples. With the sun shining behind her and her dark wavy hair cascading around her naked flesh, she looked like a goddess.
Raven slid out of her jeans and panties. And for fuck’s sake, I almost came right there. She was a vision. She trembled with nerves but the fierce look in her eyes told me she was determined to perform for me. I eased back on the grass and waited for her command.
She stood over me, strong and beautiful, then lowered herself down to the grass beside me. She pressed me down flat and began unbuttoning my shirt, pleased with what she was seeing. This woman was going to be the death of me. Every touch led to a shiver. I wanted to consume her with an appetite that was insatiable. Even just her scent threatened to send me over the edge. I had to fight with every ounce of strength in my soul to not take her against that tree. I wanted her to think she was in control. She needed to feel what that was like. If she was going to be my mate, I needed her to be powerful.
Her trembling fingers undid the button on my slacks, sliding the zipper down slow. I moaned with anticipation. Once she had my pants off, she climbed on top of me and rubbed her breasts against my chest. The sensation was electric. Her kisses were soft and slow, moving down my chest. The wet tip of her tongue danced across my abs and my muscles twitched.
I was at her mercy and I loved it. Giving up control was a new type of delicious torture. Her eyes held me in place, as they never left my gaze, locked in a fiery stare down that filled my soul with more desire than I had ever felt.
“I want to be inside you, Raven. Please…” It was more than I could take.
A devilish grin spread across her face as she mounted me. I gasped at the shift. With her tiny hands she grabbed my dick and inched it inside her.
“Fuck…” She was so tight and wet. My blood raced forward, pushing me to the brink. I held her hips still. Or else I was going to explode inside her before we even began.
She teased her fingernails down my chest. “Does that feel good?” she asked innocently, but she knew exactly what she was doing and already knew the answer.
My carnal instincts took over and the animal inside me kicked in. I flipped her over and smashed into her. Her body arched up as she moaned in delight. Her insides were like an inferno. Like a fiery ocean. With every thrust the spark between us grew, crackling like electricity. Our limbs and lips entangled in a frenzy. Blades of grass and dirt covered us, sticking to our skin underneath the hot sun.
“Harder,” she whispered.
I growled into her ear, pressing my nose against her cheek so I could breathe her into my very bones. I pounded harder, faster, pushing her into the ground like a snow angel. The vein in her neck throbbed. I sucked on the flesh that covered it. Parting my lips around it, the tips of my fangs stretched out. I wanted to taste beneath the flesh. Her sweat and salt and blood. All of her.
She moaned and writhed underneath me. She clawed at my back, pulled at my hair, and squeezed her thighs around my ass, digging her heels into the backs of legs, urging me deeper. And the vein in her neck pulsed, beckoning me. Seducing me. I had to be careful but I could play a little.
I gently took her flesh between my teeth, nibbling in delicate strokes but careful to not break the skin. I knew what it would happen if I did. One drop of her blood in my mouth and it would be over. The lightness of my teeth on her neck sent her into overdrive. She thrusted her hips up hard and arched her neck back, pressing my head to her vein. “Don’t stop,” she begged.
But I had to.
Or I would not be able to ever stop until I drank every drop.
I forced my lips away from her neck and smashed them down hard against her lips.
She squeezed her pussy tight around my dick and cried out. I had her right where I wanted her. The blood raced to the tip of my dick and tingled. I dug my fingers into her hips and tugged them up as I pounded deeper into her. I couldn’t hold back anymore. I grunted then yelled out as a final shiver shot through. At the same time, she held her breath and trembled against me as we exploded all over each other.
We laid in the cool grass, our legs still intertwined. I rested my hand on her thigh. “Fuck, Raven…” I could barely speak let alone breathe. My body was still orgasming and twitching as wave after wave of pleasure rippled through me.
She let out a deep breath. “You’ve ruined me for anyone else.”
My heart skipped a beat. I knew what she meant and I got a strange satisfaction from it. We came over and over again—in the grass, under the oak tree, until the sun began to set and the stars stole the sky like an army of fireflies. The more time I spent around Raven, the more that feeling of being lost and broken began to fade away. It was like she was plucking the pain out of me, one kiss at a time. There were so many things I didn’t know about her and that voice in my head whispered dangerous things. But I ignored the voice. I rolled over onto my side and pulled her face toward mine. “There will never be anyone else. You’re mine now.”
Her eyes flickered with something I’d never seen in her before. A wild, feral look of hunger and desire. A look that seemed to be buried under all that innocence and brokenness. She yanked me toward her with a strength I was not expecting. “Again,” she whispered. “Fuck me again.”
My phone was blowing up with messages—Enzo, Charlie, and Cassius. I ducked into the study while Raven took a tour of the library. She loved books, so as soon as I mentioned that I had a first edition of Bram Stoker’s Dracula, she insisted on seeing it immediately. A vampire who collected fictional books about vampires… The irony was not lost on me.
The first message was from Charlie, wanting to know if I was interested in any party favors. The usual—women and booze. It had been over a week since I’d reached out to him so he was probably wondering where I was.
Then there were messages from Enzo. He noticed that Raven didn’t get in the van with the other staff members and warned me again not to fuck things up for her.
And lastly, Cassius. Wanting to hang out and discuss business. Namely, the hacker situation.
I ignored all of them.
It had been decades since I was able to just relax and not worry about anything. Having Raven here in my home made me happier than I thought it would. The only thing gnawing at me was the elephant in the room. The giant, blood sucking elephant that she didn’t even know existed. The last time I told a woman I loved what I really was, I ended up with Camille. And now that was coming back to haunt me.
I wanted to believe Raven was different, but you can never really know someone. Did I want to take that risk again? I couldn’t hide it from her forever. At some point she was going to wonder why I disappeared every few hours into the cellar. She would start to question why I never got sick or injured or looked any old
er.
I turned off my phone and headed upstairs to the library. Raven was nestled on the couch, feet tucked underneath her, and engrossed in one of my books.
“The Count of Monte Cristo. Good choice. One of my favorites.” I leaned against the doorway, admiring the serene look on her face as she read.
She peered up. “I’ve loved this story since I was a kid. It always made me wonder who people really were. Not the story they tell, but the true identity of every soul. I think we all hide those parts of ourselves.”
I smiled. We were more alike than I’d thought. It was as if she understood what I was on some cellular level, even without knowing on a conscious one. “Some things must be hidden in order to protect oneself. Secrets are just that for a reason. Sometimes the reasons are valid ones. Tell me, Raven, do you have secrets?”
She gazed out the French windows, clutching the book to her chest. “Of course I do. But I think those around me have greater ones. My whole life I could feel it. That something wasn’t right. The way everyone tiptoed around me waiting for the other shoe to drop. It was like they were all in on it except me. And so I never felt like I really belonged there. Not in Maplewood, not even in my own home.”
A twinge of guilt rippled through me at the realization that I was one of those people in her life now that was keeping secrets from her. “The truth finds its way out eventually. Even when you don’t want it to.”
I knew that all too well.
She nodded and smiled lazily at me. “I know it’s coming. And when whatever it is does, I know that there will be no going back. Everything will change.”
I wanted to shield her from all of it. Protect her forever. But there was no avoiding this destiny. Not unless I let her go. And I had no intention of doing so. I waited too long for someone like Raven. I just needed to find the right words and the right time before it was too late.
For the next two nights, Ozi and I were inseparable. It was like a dream. One that I didn’t want to wake up from. For the first time in a long time, I didn’t hurt. I didn’t think about Alex or my family back home. I was just able to be present in the moment and feel things I never thought I’d feel again.
Ozi touched me in ways that I knew my body would always crave. As if all my cells were waking up from a long dreamless sleep. He was both rough and gentle at the same time. He brought out a side of me, a carnal side, that surprised me more than him. It was the weekend of endless orgasms and decadent indulgences. When he wasn’t making me come, he was filling me up with five star delicacies and expensive champagne.
The most surprising revelation was how easy he was to talk to. That we actually had things in common. We both loved the same books and art. We could talk for hours about history and I loved that he knew a little bit about everything. Our conversations flowed easily. It was refreshing to be with a man who wasn’t glued to the TV.
But there was something between us that wasn’t right. It wasn’t like the normal way people fall in love. We were consumed by each other. Consumed by lust. It was becoming an obsession. The more we touched, the more we wanted. My body was in a constant state of tremors and tingles. Just the slightest stroke of his fingertips across my belly sent me into a frenzy. This thing between us…it was like a drug. It was intoxicating.
He could make me fall. He could crush my heart into dust. And as much as that tiny voice in my head was screaming at me to run, I couldn’t turn away. I wasn’t the same since I’d first laid eyes on him. And now, even more, I knew that I couldn’t go back to how I was before.
It was almost time to head back into the city and a deep aching dread tugged at my mind. My stomach was in knots. How was this going to work? What exactly were we to each other? He’d claimed my body but made no attempt to offer me his heart. Were two broken people even capable of love? Would this attraction and lust wear off, and if so, what then? Who would I be after?
Ozi hugged me tight to his chest under the covers. He caressed my shoulder with just the tips of his fingers, sending tiny shivers down my spine. “I’ve arranged a car to take you back home. I have some business to attend to for the next couple of days but then…I’d like to see you again.”
Reality was crashing back in. I’d have to go back home to my empty apartment. Back to my job at his restaurant where most of the staff couldn’t stand me. After this weekend, I could only imagine the gossip that would be floating around. Everyone knew I’d stayed behind to be with Ozi.
I traced circles on his chest with my fingers, enjoying the smoothness of it. “Ozi…I don’t want things to be awkward between us at the restaurant. If you don’t want me to work for you anymore, I’d understand. Sleeping with the boss was not my intention. I don’t want anyone making you feeling uncomfortable about it.”
He turned his head and placed a light kiss on my cheek. “You’ll do nothing of the sort. You can work at Dolce Sale for as long as you like. Don’t listen to them, Raven. You are not just some one night stand if that’s what you’re wondering. There are promises I’m not ready to make just yet. Secrets I’m not ready to share. But please be patient with me. I meant what I said…I’m never letting you go.”
It was a strange thing to say considering we had no idea what we really meant to each other. How long could we hold onto this if we weren’t willing to give ourselves over completely?
“Whatever you say, boss,” I teased. I didn’t know what else to say. As close as I felt to him right now, lying in his arms, I also felt this enormous distance and space. And there was always the part of me that believed that all men were like Alex. That one day, Ozi would grow tired of me, and leave me for someone else. Isn’t that what men did? Most never seemed satisfied with what they had. Even my own father reeked of perfume most nights after staying late at the office. My mom looked the other way but the hurt in her eyes was too obvious to ignore. She settled because it was easier to patch up the boat than to rock it. I was too scared to get in the boat at all.
Ozi played with my hair, twirling strands through his fingers. “Where did you go, darling?”
“What do you mean? I’m right here.”
He pressed a finger to my temple. “In your head. Where did you go in your head? I can hear it in your breath, in your heartbeat, you wandered off to somewhere else.”
“I can’t help it sometimes. Sorry. I’ve been trying to stay present. There are things that are hard to forget. Dark corners that I’ve become so used to, they don’t even scare me anymore.”
He shuddered and tightened his grip around my shoulders. “I’ll protect you from the nightmares.”
I felt warm and safe in his arms, but as I drifted off to sleep, I couldn’t help but remember his words. I don’t have any demons. I am the demon.
I didn’t have any nightmares, or dreams for that matter, for the rest of the night. By morning, the sun was shining again and all of my fears felt silly. That was until he kissed me goodbye and put me in a car back to the city. The further the car took me away from his house, the bigger the ache in my chest became. Was it his absence? Suppressed emotions that were now resurfacing because I didn’t have Ozi to distract me? It was a feeling like homesickness, only I wasn’t sure which home I was missing more.
Two days. That’s how long he said we’d be apart. I felt like the bubble was going to burst. But what could possibly change in two days?
“Cassius. Did you find out anything?”
“A little but mostly firewalls. I need access to the local stuff. Feel like taking a trip?”
“Fuck. All right. I’ll pick you up in an hour.”
I hung up the phone and pulled up my GPS. It was a three hour drive to Maplewood. If we left soon, we could be back in New York by early morning tomorrow. We could drive all night. And we would if it meant getting some answers. There were things that just didn’t add up. Things her family was keeping from her. And what were the odds that the hacker pinged activity from the same place that Raven grew up in? What were the odds that a girl from a smal
l town interned at my winery in Italy and then coincidentally found herself working at my restaurant in New York? I needed to know if there was a connection.
This need to protect her grew stronger by the minute. I would tell her whatever I found out after but I didn’t want to worry her for nothing. I placed a cooler full of blood bags in the back seat of my sedan and headed out to the lake to pick up Cassius. Even though it was still three more days till the next full moon, I’d also loaded the chains in the trunk just in case. There was a time when I was strong enough to hold him down with my bare hands, but with every shift, he became harder and harder to control. If he would just stop fucking about and find himself a mate, it wouldn’t be as bad.
Back on the road with no driver, it was just me and Cassius on another adventure like the old days. If Lux were here, he’d call me an asshole but come along just so he could taunt me the whole way. He had a knack for talking shit but that was his way of showing love. We were brothers in a sense, the three of us. We’d do anything for each other. I didn’t know what we were going to find in Maplewood. But something told me it was not going to be good.
I fixated on the green olives swirling around in my martini glass, watching them float amidst the tiny ice crystals inside the vodka.
“Raven, you haven’t said a word since we got here. What is going on with you, girl?” Max asked.
I shook my head and took a sip of my drink. “It’s nothing. Sorry I missed brunch on Sunday. Something came up.”
“It’s fine. That’s why they invented happy hour. And by something, you mean our deliciously fine boss, right?”