The gray flecks in his deep blue eyes danced to a mysterious tune as he darted her a grin. When she looked into those dark pools, she could drown in happiness. But today, even the warmth emanating from his smile couldn’t stop the concern that edged her voice. “Don’t worry? But I do, William. What about . . .”
“Us?”
She nodded.
He leveled his gaze so that she looked directly at him. “Nothing has changed. We’ll still get married in November after the harvest.”
Rebecca hesitated. She couldn’t believe William would really leave Arthur, Illinois. But his reason was legitimate. His father needed him. She wasn’t selfish, and asking him to stay would be.
Circumstances were beyond her control. What could she do? The question nagged at her until frustration set in. Within a matter of minutes, her world had changed, and she fought to adjust. She nervously tapped the toe of her black shoe against the ground.
As she crossed her arms over her chest, she wished they could protect her from the dilemma she faced. Her brows narrowed into a frown, and a long silence ensued. She looked at him, hoping for an answer. Seeking even a hint of a solution.
To her surprise, William teased, “Rebecca, stop studying me like I’m a map of the world.”
His statement broke the tension, and she burst into laughter because a map of the world was such a far stretch from what she’d been thinking.
“Of course, you’ve got to help your folks, William. I know how much Daniel’s business means to him. You certainly can’t let him lose it. I can imagine the number of cabinets on order.”
Surprised and relieved that her voice sounded steady, Rebecca’s shoulders trembled as the thought of William leaving sank in. They’d grown up together and hadn’t spent a day without seeing one another.
She stopped a moment and considered Daniel and Beth Conrad. Nearly a decade ago, William’s mamma had died, and Daniel had married Beth.
He was a skilled cabinetmaker. It was no surprise that people from all over the United States ordered his custom-made pieces. Rebecca had seen samples of his elegant, beautiful woodworking.
A thought popped into Rebecca’s mind, and she frowned. “William, you seem to be forgetting something very important. Daniel and Beth . . . They’re English.”
He nodded. “Don’t think I haven’t given that consideration.”
“I don’t want to sound pessimistic, but how will you stay Amish in their world?”
He shrugged. “They’re the same as us, really.”
She rolled her eyes. “Of course they are. But the difference between our lifestyle and theirs is night and day. How can you expect to move in with them and be compatible?”
William hooked his fingers over his trouser pockets, looked down at the ground and furrowed a brow. Rebecca smiled. She knew him so well. Whenever something bothered him, he did this. Rebecca loved the intense look on his face when he worried. The small indentation in his chin intensified.
What fascinated her most, though, were the mysterious gray flecks that danced in his eyes. When he lifted his chin, those flecks took on a metallic appearance. Mesmerized, Rebecca couldn’t stop looking at them.
Moments later, as if having made an important decision, he stood still, moved his hands to his hips, and met her gaze with a nod.
In a more confident tone, he spoke. “It will be okay, Rebecca. Don’t forget that Dad was Amish before he married Beth. He was raised with the same principles as us. Just because he’s English now doesn’t mean he’s forgotten everything he learned. No need to worry. He won’t want me to change.”
“No?”
William gave a firm shake of his head. “Of course not. In fact, I’m sure he’ll insist that I stick to how I was brought up. Remember, he left me with Aenti Sarah and Uncle John when he remarried. Dad told me that raising me Amish was what my mother would have expected. The Ordnung was important to her. And keeping the faith must have also been at the top of Dad’s list to have left me here. Nothing will change, Rebecca.”
Rebecca realized that she was making too much out of William’s going away. After all, it was only Indiana. Not the North Pole! Suddenly embarrassed at her lack of strength, she looked down at the hem of her dress before gazing straight into his eyes. He moved so close, his warm breath caressed her bottom lip, and it quivered. Time seemed to stand still while she savored the silent mutual understanding between them. That unique, unexplainable connection that she and William had.
“I’ve always read that things happen for a reason,” William mentioned.
“Me too.” Rebecca also knew the importance of the Ordnung. And she knew William’s mamma, Miriam, would have wanted him to stay in the faith that had meant everything to her.
As if sensing her distress, he interlaced his fingers together in front of him. His hands were large. She’d watched those very hands lift heavy bales of hay.
“Who knows? Maybe this is God’s way of testing me.”
Rebecca gave an uncertain roll of her eyes. “Talk to your aunt and uncle. They’ll know what’s best. After all, they’ve raised you since your father remarried.”
The frustration in William’s voice lifted a notch. “I already did. It’s hard to convince them that what I’m doing is right.” He lowered his voice. “You know how they feel. When Dad left the faith, he deserted me. But even so, I can’t turn my back on him.”
“Of course not.”
“Aenti Sarah’s concerned that people will treat me differently when I come back. She wants to talk to the bishop and get his permission. If that makes her feel better, then I’m all for it.”
“If he’ll give his blessing.”
William nodded in agreement.
“But we’re old enough to think for ourselves, William. When we get married and raise our family, we can’t let everyone make up our minds for us.”
He raised a brow. “You’re so independent, Miss Rebecca.”
She smiled a little.
A mischievous twinkle lightened his eyes.
“Your decision shouldn’t be based on what people think,” Rebecca said. “If we made choices to please others, we’d never win. Deep down inside, we have to be happy with ourselves. So you’ve got to do what’s in your heart. And no one can decide that but you.”
The expression that crossed his face suddenly became unreadable. She tilted her head and studied him with immense curiosity. “What are you thinking?”
His gray flecks repeated that metallic appearance. “Rebecca, you’re something else.”
A surge of warmth rushed through her.
“I can’t believe your insight.” He blinked in amazement. “You’re an angel.” His voice was low and soft. She thought he was going to kiss her. But he didn’t. William followed the church rules. But Rebecca wouldn’t have minded breaking that one.
In a breathless voice, she responded, “Thank you for that.”
As if suddenly remembering the crux of their conversation, William returned to the original topic. “I’ve assured Aenti Sarah and Uncle John that I won’t leave the Amish community. That I’ll come back, and we’ll get married. They finally justified letting me leave by looking at this as an opportunity to explore Rumspringa.”
Rebecca grinned. “I guess that’s one way to look at it.” Rumspringa was the transition time between adolescence and adulthood when an Amish youth could try things before deciding whether to join the faith for him—or herself. She even had a friend who had gone as far as to get a driver’s license.
He paused. “Rebecca, I know we didn’t plan on this.” His voice grew more confident as he continued. “You’ve got to understand that I love you more than anything in the world. Please tell me you’ll wait for me. I give you my word that this move is only temporary. As soon as Dad’s on his feet again, I’ll come home. Promise.”
As William committed, Rebecca took in his dark brown hair. The sun’s brightness lightened it to the color of sand. For a moment, his features were both rugg
ed and endearing. Rebecca’s heart melted.
Her voice softened. “How long do you think you’ll stay?”
William pressed his lips together thoughtfully. “Good question. Hopefully, he’ll be back to work in no time. His customers depend on him, and according to Beth, he has a long list of orders for cabinets to produce and deliver. He’s a strong man, Rebecca. He’ll be okay.”
“I believe that. I’ll never forget when he came into town last year to see you.” She giggled. “Remember his fancy car?”
William chuckled. “He sure enjoys the luxuries of the English. I wish our community wouldn’t be so harsh on him. He’s really Amish at heart.”
William hesitated. “I used to resent that he left me.”
Long moments passed in silence. He stepped closer and lowered his voice to a whisper. “Rebecca, you’ve become unusually quiet. And you didn’t answer my question.”
She raised an inquisitive brow.
“Will you wait for me?”
Her thoughts were chaotic. For something to do, she looked down and flattened her hands against her long, brown dress. She realized how brave William was and recalled the scandal Daniel Conrad had made when he married outside of the faith and had moved to the country outside of Evansville, Indiana. She raised her chin to look at William’s face. Mamma always told her that a person’s eyes gave away his feelings.
The tongue could lie. But not the eyes. William’s intriguing flecks had become a shade lighter, dancing with hope and sincerity. His cheeks were flushed.
“William, you’ve got to do this.” She let out a small, thoughtful sigh. “I remember a particular church sermon from a long time ago. The message was that our success in life isn’t determined by making easy choices. It’s measured by how we deal with difficult issues. And leaving Arthur is definitely a tough decision.”
He hugged his hands to his hips. “What are you getting at?”
She quietly sought an answer to his question. What did she mean? She’d sounded like she knew what she was talking about. Moments later, the answer came. She recognized it with complete clarity.
She squared her shoulders. “I promised you I’d stick by you forever, William. And right now, you need me.”
He gazed down at her in confusion.
Clearing her throat, she looked up at him and drew a long breath. “I’m going with you.”
* * *
Inside Old Sam Beachy’s barn, Rebecca poured out her dilemma to her dear friend. Afterwards, Buddy whimpered sympathetically at her feet. Rebecca reached down from her rocking chair opposite Old Sam’s workbench and obediently stroked the Irish setter behind his ears. The canine closed his eyes in contentment.
Old Sam was famous for his hope chests. He certainly wasn’t the only person to put together the pieces, but he was a brilliant artist who etched beautiful, personalized designs into the lids.
Rebecca had looked at his beloved Esther as a second mother. Since she’d succumbed to pneumonia a couple of years ago, Rebecca had tried to return her kindness to the old widower. So did her friends, Rachel and Annie. The trio took care of him. Rachel listened to Sam’s horse-and-buggy stories. Annie baked him delicious sponge cakes while Rebecca picked him fresh flowers.
Drawing a long breath, Rebecca wondered what advice he’d give. Whatever it was would be good. Because no one was wiser than Old Sam. She crossed her legs at the ankles. Sawdust floated in the air. Rebecca breathed in the woodsy smell of oak.
When he started to speak, she sat up a little straighter. “The real secret to happiness is not what we give or receive; it’s what we share. I would consider your help to William and his parents a gift from the heart. At the same time, a clear conscience is a soft pillow. You want to have the blessing of our bishop and your parents. The last thing you want is a scandal about you and William living under the same roof.”
Rebecca let out a deep, thoughtful sigh as she considered his wisdom. In the background, she could hear Ginger enter her stall from the pasture. Old Sam’s horse snorted. And that meant she wanted an apple.
Sam’s voice prompted Rebecca to meet his gaze. “Rebecca, I can give you plenty of advice. But the most important thing I can tell you is to pray.”
Rebecca nodded and crossed her arms over her chest.
“But remember: Do not ask the Lord to guide your footsteps if you’re not willing to move your feet.”
* * *
Rebecca was fully aware that William was ready to leave. In her front yard, she hugged her baby sister, Emily, shoving a rebellious strand of blond hair out of her face. Rebecca planted an affectionate kiss on brother Peter’s cheek. “Be good.”
Pete’s attention was on Rebecca just long enough to say good-bye. As she turned to her father, the two kids started screaming and chasing each other in a game of tag. Emily nearly tripped over a chicken in the process. Rebecca was quick to notice the uncertain expression on Old Sam’s face.
The sweet, creamy smell of homemade butter competed with the aroma of freshly baked bread. Both enticing scents floated out of the open kitchen windows. Tonight, Rebecca would miss Mamma’s dinner. It would be the first time Rebecca hadn’t eaten with her family.
Her heart pumped to an uncertain beat. But she’d never let her fear show. Ever since the death of her other little sister, Rebecca had learned to put on a brave façade. Her family depended on her for strength.
Rebecca’s father grasped her hands and gave them a tight squeeze. She immediately noted that his arms shook. It stunned her to realize that his embrace was more of a nervous gesture than an offer of support. And the expression on his face was anything but encouraging. Rebecca understood his opposition to what she was about to do. Her father’s approval was important to her, and it bothered her to seem disrespectful.
All of her life, she’d tried hard to please him. They’d never even argued. In fact, this was the first time she’d gone against his wishes. But William was her future. She wanted to be by his side whenever he needed her.
In a gruff, firm voice, her father spoke. “Be careful, Becca. You know how I feel. I’m disappointed that William hasn’t convinced you to stay. You belong here. In Arthur.”
He pushed out a frustrated breath. “But you’re of age to make your own decision. We’ve made arrangements with Beth so that living under the same roof with William will be proper. We trust she’ll be a responsible chaperone while you’re with the Conrads. Just come home soon. We need your help with chores.”
He pointed an authoritative finger. “And never let the English ways influence you. They will tempt you to be like them, Becca. Remember your faith.”
Rebecca responded with a teary nod. When she finally faced Mamma, she forced a brave smile. But the tightness in her throat made it difficult to say good-bye.
Mamma’s deep blue eyes clouded with moisture. With one swift motion, Rebecca hugged her. For long moments, she was all too aware of how much she would miss that security. The protection only a parent could offer.
Much too soon, Mamma released her and held her at arm’s length. When Rebecca finally turned to Old Sam, he stepped forward and handed her a cardboard container with handles.
She met his gaze and lifted a curious brow. “This is for me?”
He nodded. “I hope you like it.” He pointed. “Go ahead. Take it out.”
Everyone was quiet while she removed the gift. As she lifted the hope chest, she caught her breath. There was a unanimous sound of awe from the group. “Old Sam . . .” She focused on the design etched into the lid. “It’s absolutely beautiful! I will treasure it the rest of my life.”
“You always bring me fresh flowers, so I thought you’d like the bouquet.”
She glanced at William before turning her attention back to Sam. “I’m taking the miniature hope chest with me.”
Sam’s voice was low and edged with emotion. “I will pray for your safety. And remember that freedom is not to do as you please, but the liberty to do as you ought. And the pe
rson who sows seeds of kindness will have a perpetual harvest. That’s you, Rebecca.”
Rebecca blinked as salty tears filled her eyes. With great care, she returned the hope chest to its box on the bright green blades of grass.
Old Sam’s voice cracked. “You come back soon. And if you want good advice, consult an old man.” A grin tugged at Rebecca’s lips. Sam knew every proverb in the book. She’d miss hearing him recount them.
“Thank you again. I can’t wait to start putting away special trinkets for the children I will have some day.”
When she looked up at him, he merely nodded approval.
William’s voice startled her from her thoughts. “Rebecca, it’s time to head out. It’s gonna be a long drive.”
Her gaze remained locked with Mamma’s. Mary Sommer’s soft voice shook with emotion. “This is the first time you’ve left us. But you’re strong.”
Rebecca squeezed her eyes closed for several heartbeats.
As if to reassure herself, her mother went on. “We hope Daniel recovers quickly. William needs you. In the meantime, God will keep both of you in His hands. Don’t forget that. Always pray. And remember what we’ve taught you. Everything you’ve learned in church.”
“Jah.”
“It’s never been a secret that God gave you a special gift for accepting challenges. I’ll never forget the time you jumped into that creek to save your brother. You pulled him to shore.”
Rebecca grinned. “I remember.”
“Rumspringa might be the most important time in your life. But be very careful. There will be temptations in the English world. In fact, the bishop is concerned that you will decide against joining the Amish church.”
“I know who I am.”
A tear rolled down Mamma’s cheek while she slipped something small and soft between Rebecca’s palms. Rebecca glanced down at the crocheted cover.
“I put together this Scripture book to help you while you’re away, Rebecca. When you have doubts or fears, read it. The good words will comfort and give you strength. You can even share them with Beth. She’s going through a difficult time. Your daed and I will pray for you every day.” She paused. “Lend Daniel your support. The bishop wants you to set three additional goals and accomplish them while you’re gone. Give them careful consideration. They must be unselfish and important. Doing this will make your mission even more significant.”
Love at Pebble Creek Page 21