Light from Aphelion 2 - Tears of Winter

by Martine Carlsson

  “We met the Children,” Louis said, enjoying the perfume of freshly baked bread as he cut himself a slice.

  “You’re joking.” The boy gaped with stupefaction. “This is one of the Children? They’re still alive?”

  Louis gave him a knowing smile. “We have learned that our only chance to find a cure is to search for one of their tribes which may reside in the mountains beyond Earthfell.”

  Folc filled himself a mug and drank. Foam got stuck in the hair over his lip that Louis still found it hard to call a beard. “Beyond Earthfell? This is a long way to go. Should I contact the capital for more men?”

  “Don’t. We will ride faster as a small party. It would even be preferable if you stayed here with our men and kept on organizing Embermire.”

  “No,” Folc said. Louis noticed that Askjell and Kilda turned to them, shocked by the boy’s reaction. “I mean, I prefer not, Your Majesty.”

  Louis sighed. “Will you tell me again that your function is to protect me?”

  Folc swallowed a mouthful of meat. “It is. I am the captain of the royal guard. I have no duty towards Embermire.”

  Louis cursed inwardly that the boy knew too well that he would never reproach him his loyalty and devotion, thus making any contradictory order void. “Maybe, but someone has to rule this city. I suppose you enforced my orders?”

  “The Council’s members were executed soon after your departure,” Folc said with a twist of the mouth. “We await an answer from Pembroke. Yet, our men are totally able to apply the rules in application in the capital. I could put someone trustworthy in charge.”

  Selen bent towards Louis. “Let him come,” his friend whispered. “You know well it’s not about his function.”

  I know. This is exactly why he shouldn’t come with us, Louis thought. At the same time, an extra sword would not hurt, and Folc needed experience. “All right. You fix the details concerning the organization of the city and pack your bags.” Louis turned to his companions. “We will all meet in the yard tomorrow at dawn. If some of you have a change of heart, it’s now or never. Yet, as the survival of our people is at stake, I expect your commitment.” He looked at Kilda and Lissandro, but none of them objected. Louis nudged Selen. “Follow me.”

  They rose and slipped out of the great hall. Unnoticed under their cloaks, they went across halls, up stairways, and passed through a wicket gate leading to the southern tower. Louis took a lantern off a hook and, preceding Selen, climbed the narrow staircase. The croaking of the birds coming from above told him he was on the right way.

  “How do you know the place?” Selen asked behind him.

  “I don’t. But when I was in the yard, a few times I noticed crows come and go from this tower.”

  They opened the door to the last level of the tower. Several metallic cages hung from the beams, while others stood on tables. The poorly lit room stank bird droppings. Louis guessed the smell would have been worse if not for the gaping windows which let the chill air blow in draughts.

  “Can I help you?” someone grunted. From behind a shelf, an old man half hidden under brown robes and hood shambled towards them.

  “We need to send a message to Lord Pembroke,” Louis said.

  The man stared at them and mumbled something between his teeth. “Write it down,” the man said, pointing at a table where papers and quills lay among bird filth and feathers. “I’ll prepare a bird in the meanwhile.”

  So much for the courtesies, Louis thought. Not that he liked bows and scrapes, but he appreciated not to be treated like a rogue. Selen tore a small piece of paper and took a quill and ink. They sat on the stone benches on the sides of one of the windows. “Do we write the truth?” Selen asked.

  “Should this paper fall into the wrong hands, it may mean death for Pembroke and our friends left in the palace,” Louis said. “Yet, if we are too abstruse, he may misunderstand us.”

  Selen jotted down something and gave it to Louis. More than what we thought. There are moles watching you. “It is an evasive warning. It should suffice,” Louis said. He dusted the ink.

  “What do you think their plans a—”

  Louis grabbed Selen’s hand and hushed him. While he folded the paper, he rose and went to the other side of the room where the grumpy man harnessed the bird. “How long will it take?”

  The man looked at him and gave him a foul smirk. “Days. A week. Never.” He tucked the message in the leather pouch and threw the crow into the air.

  Louis watched the crow fly away. He hoped the bird would stay away from foxes. Should something happen to Pembroke, disaster would fall on the capital. This message was their only chance, their last contact with Nysa Serin for weeks, if they ever made it back.

  The water in the wooden tub was warm and relaxing. So was the heat of the fire in the hearth. The obnoxious smell of his sweat had faded into thin air, replaced by the perfume of the lavender and olive oil of the soap. Louis heard the sound of the dripping water as Selen pressed the sponge against his arm. His skin, kept moist by the rising steam, had taken a light shade of pink. However, his wet hair was turning cold. He shivered.

  “Did I hurt you?” Selen asked in his soft-spoken voice.

  Louis shook his head and half smiled. As the soapy sponge reached his shoulder, Selen’s legs crept closer around his waist. Yet Louis barely noticed. His gaze was lost in the innocent, emerald eyes of his friend, his small, upturned nose, and his full lips.

  He should have died that night. Nothing worse could possibly have happened. He had plunged so deep into sorrow that nothing mattered anymore. Yet, one look at these pleading eyes had stopped his hand. He felt weak by the extent of control Selen had on him. Only once before had he allowed someone to have such an ascendancy on his life. However, allowed was the rightful term. It was his own will, his own decision. The result of Louis’s admiration and devotion for the ones who had found favor with him. As his previous love in his first life, Selen was totally unaware of his power, or ignored it, and it should stay that way.

  “I feel like I am waking up from a nightmare,” Louis said, tracing a finger on Selen’s large cheekbone.

  “You went through a lot,” Selen said, kissing his hand. “Your wound is healing.” From the side of the tub, he lifted a green-glazed ewer and poured warm, perfumed water in which floated lavender, rosemary, and angelica.

  Selen had added the blood bound to Louis’s conception of his friendship ceremony. Never had Louis thought this concept could have turned real. It had moved him, especially that his friend had taken the initiative. Louis didn’t know if there was a term for what they were now, but he knew they could never become closer. “I didn’t spare you either. All those things you told me…that I saw you as a trophy. Did you mean it?” Selen lowered his gaze. “I want the truth,” Louis insisted, cupping Selen’s cheek.

  “No. I don’t think you see me that way. And I agree with most of your thoughts, but it’s true that I don’t speak my mind enough.” Selen paused and bit his lip. “I am scared to sound foolish or that you will disagree with me. Last time, it was something I had at heart, and it turned into a whirlpool of pain for both of us.”

  “Do you think I would act that way with you and show you my true self if I thought you were a fool?” Louis asked in the softest tone. Selen shook his head. His long, lilac hair waved on the water’s surface. A few lavender petals fastened in it. “I didn’t know it meant that much to you… Or maybe I did, but I felt scared. It is not something I have considered.”

  “You said that a country should have couples producing healthy children.”

  The reflection left Louis perplexed. How does that even concern us? Neither of us is married. “Yes, this is an obvious fact and a rhetorical statement. I didn’t talk of myself.” Considering his own needs was not part of his thoughts. He could already barely conceive what he would do in a week or a month. “Did you ponder on the word produce? You know what that means? What I will have to do to give you what you want?”
Because there was no doubt to Louis he would be the one to go through the steps. Albeit if he wanted any rights on the children, Selen should make them himself, but his friend would never survive the touch of a woman, let alone lay a hand on one. Besides, to share him was out of the question. Could Selen consider sharing him? And what of Selen’s status? To make him step down in favor of a woman would be such a humiliation, even if it was the only way—after all he had done to legitimate him as a queen. To lose his time pondering such trivial futilities already sickened Louis. No. He refused to ruin his life. It had been enough to smear his reputation in the name of love. To create one more scandal and force himself to bed a woman for weeks for a caprice was beyond his level of acceptance. He was preparing himself to state his opposition when Selen wried his face.

  “What you will have to do…? It’s not how I saw it. As far as I can remember my childhood, I grew up as property of the state. I was alone. I only wondered…”

  “Oh.” Louis just realized what Selen had meant. He felt a huge relief when the thought of his wedding vanished. Adoption made sense in Selen’s world and was then a single adult man’s decision. Selen only wished for his approval. Most likely, Selen wanted to give a family to Folc and a secure future through a dowry. Louis wasn’t an expert on the subject, but in Rome, Octavius and Scipio had been adopted. It must have been the same procedure in Crete. According to Louis’s conception of adoption, Folc was far too old to be adopted. He belonged to the state. However, the new laws on adoption that limited the procedure to married couples for the boys under five years hadn’t been proclaimed yet. But you know these laws… When you said couples, could you mean…? Louis wondered if he had ever insinuated… Then he remembered his own notes. Those who love each other are spouses. It was bold to apply it to them, but Louis liked the idea. He smiled at Selen. “Let me think about it. And never hesitate to speak your mind. I love you for who you are.”

  Selen smiled back. “From now on, I will only listen to my heart. Now that it is you and me against the rest of the world again, how can I help you?”

  Louis shifted his eyes before looking at Selen. “Did I ruin all we did by leaving the capital? Have they lost all trust and respect for me?”

  “Why would you think that? A normal king would have left the city for long or locked himself in his palace. You went to search for help. Of course, we have to come back with something. Because if we don’t, everyone will die. So, I don’t see why you would have lost your power.”

  “I have never been a leader. I never wanted to be. It should have been a general impulse from the population, not me giving orders or fixing laws. There is a big difference between coming up with bright ideas and making the right decisions. I’m not scared of the responsibility, but I don’t want to have to make these choices alone. They are not mine to make.”

  Selen chuckled. “We created a whole council with people representing every part of the city, but you still give orders and impose your views, and it’s not because you’re the king. I know that the people are still not instructed enough. Yet, you can’t deny you are a bit of a perfectionist. I can’t help much with that. We will already see when we come back how the city managed without you. We have been there for less than two years, and it may take generations for people to get used to such progress. I am amazed we are still alive by now.” Selen let his hand slip into the water. “Talking about being alive, we are in Embermire.” Selen gave a naughty grin and leaned towards him. Louis felt the sponge rub between his thighs. “I haven’t touched myself for days,” Selen whispered in his ear, pressing his hand firmer along his crotch. Two of Selen’s fingers slid inside him. Louis’s flesh and the air around him turned hot.

  Louis put his hand on Selen’s, following the up-and-down motion. The fingers slithered in the most exquisite massage, loosening him. Selen’s eyes gazed into his. His friend gaped, absent-mindedly delecting himself of each twitch of his face as the pulp grazed the sensitive mount of nerves.

  “I am reconsidering the notion of pure concerning you,” Louis breathed. He scraped his lower lip and relaxed with his eyes half closed. He could feel the weight of his own stiffening cock on his lower loins now.

  Selen put an end to his drooling and removed his hand. Pink tainted his cheeks, but his eyes betrayed the lewd state he had driven himself into. “Considering you’re my first and only love, maybe you give a terrible example,” Selen teased.

  As much as Louis felt the blush on his cheeks, he disliked Selen’s words. He put a finger on Selen’s lips. “Don’t walk that line further. I do prefer you pure. Nor will we give away a hint of what happens in such places between you and me.” He leaned towards Selen, grazed his lips with his tongue, and explored his mouth. Selen returned his kiss and tangled his fingers into Louis’s hair. Holding the back of his head, Louis deepened their kiss and rolled his tongue around Selen’s until his friend interrupted their embrace.

  “Are you ashamed of me?”

  “No.” Louis lowered his eyes. “Not of you,” he answered, ill at ease.

  Though Louis felt freer in this world and knew his feelings were pure, his inclination was still a vice in the eyes of the world. While he fully assumed it in private, he was not ready to assume more publicly than their status and a noble and fraternal affection. Even if he envied it, he didn’t have Selen’s cultural background, which tolerated more such openness.

  Selen poked his chest. Louis jerked up his head. “Stop thinking,” Selen whispered with a candid smile. “This world doesn’t glorify enough the body and sex in general. Yet, in no way does it mean we need to display our life. I would turn red as a beet at the mention of these private things in public.” Flushing in the color of the aforementioned beets, Selen lowered his gaze. “But I wouldn’t mind a public kiss once.”

  The words set Louis’s heart afire. As he pondered the different ways they could use the tub, Selen slipped away from him, got up, and turned around. Louis gazed as if hypnotized at his love’s back. His hands grasped the long, muscular legs, caressing them up to Selen’s bottom. Louis cupped the firm, round cheeks which fitted his palms perfectly. He approached his lips, kissed one and nibbled at it. His mouth wandered to the inner sides. Selen uttered a squeak when he pleasured him. As Louis’s hands squeezed the cheeks tighter, Selen shivered. Before he could drag him down again to ease his own ache, Selen slipped away to step out of the wooden tub, leaving Louis biting his lip in frustration. Once he had wrung his hair to the front, Selen walked towards the bed. Still under his spell, Louis left the water and followed him.

  “The base is so high,” Selen whispered, looking at the old, oaken canopy bed. He knelt on the wool blankets, his long thighs and back fully exposed. His hand skimmed the green velvet of the comforter. “Did you sleep here last time?”

  Louis knelt behind him, his hand rubbing himself hard, shoved Selen onto his stomach, and lay down on top of him. Selen’s body was smooth and cool. Louis rubbed his crotch against Selen’s curved bottom. It barely satisfied his ache now burning between his legs. His lips kissed Selen’s moist neck, and he breathed in its flowery scent.

  “I didn’t only sleep, I dreamed of you. Let me show you how,” he whispered in Selen’s ear and grabbed himself. Selen’s breathing was sharp as Louis pressed his swollen organ through Selen’s wet entrance. It was tight. Selen hadn’t lied. It had been long, and the bath had barely loosened him.

  Louis uttered a moan. “You’re squeezing me.”

  “I am not a dream,” Selen answered.

  And finally, he was in. His heart hammered in his chest. One hand grasping Selen’s shoulder, Louis stretched his neck and covered Selen’s other shoulder and jaw with kisses and licks while his hips’ moves turned from grind to blunt thrust. No, but I dreamed I would do this since we left the village. His lust for his love had returned as soon as the sadness had unclenched his heart. His aching loins were on fire. His harsh breathing turned into moans. Selen arched his back and opened his legs wider. Louis flicke
red a smile. Enjoy it, my love. You’re mine. He slipped his other hand across Selen’s contracted stomach, down his bush of wild hair, and up around his shaft, but Selen pushed it away.

  “Not yet,” Selen murmured.

  Selen stifled his ecstatic screams against his arm. Louis gently shifted it to the side. To hear Selen burn with pleasure turned him crazy. His fingers sank into Selen’s shoulder as his hips bucked. Moving so fast and hard was exhausting but rapturing.

  “Oh, yes, Selen,” he panted. “Like that… Now.”

  Mine. Louis rammed a few more times into his friend’s bottom before his orgasm took him, and he released himself deep with a few rough moans. His mind blurred. He stayed motionless until his urge finally calmed down. His heart racing in his chest, he panted, short of breath. Feeling sorry for his harsh and selfish behavior, he hugged Selen long and kissed the corner of his mouth.

  He crept to the side to watch his Cretan love’s face. “I hope I didn’t hurt you,” he muttered.

  With the tip of his fingers, Selen brushed away the locks sticking on Louis’s face and slithered onto Louis’s back. “You didn’t, and I’ll try not to,” his friend whispered in his ear and nuzzled his face in his neck that he covered with kisses and nips. Louis felt against his bottom how much Selen wanted him.

  “I thought you didn’t want to stand on top of me,” Louis whispered, bucking up his hips for Selen’s slick manhood to wedge between his cheeks. “Not that I complain,” he added with little hope for his invitation.

  Selen pressed himself against him but chuckled. “Sorry. As ridiculous as it is, I still don’t.” Selen clasped his arms around his torso and pulled him onto his side. “I don’t think we will have much privacy after today.” With one hand, he raised Louis’s leg over his hip. “I have a lot…” He scraped his teeth over Louis’s collarbone and tweaked one of Louis’s nipples. “…To be forgiven for,” Selen purred. He kissed Louis’s cheek and the corner of his mouth. “And I’m burning.”