Shadow of a Doubt

by Hunter Blain

  “They are mostly harmless, given you stay on the path. The sprites live in the moment without a care in the world.”

  “BAMBI!” I cried out while snapping a finger and surprising Lily.

  “Pardon?”

  “Huh? Oh, nothing. Something I was thinking about earlier.”

  “Right…” Lily let the word drag as her brain filed that away and shifted gears back to what she was saying. “Stay on the road and look forward. You should be safe while you are with me.”

  The woods started to thin, giving way to a field of the brightest green that rivaled any tourist attraction or movie of my plane. I was mesmerized as we walked over a stream on a bridge made of stone and wood. We were stopped on the other side by a particularly nasty-looking troll that put a hand out as he blocked the road.

  “Toll,” the toll troll said around tusks that protruded from his bottom lip, affecting his speech.

  I looked him in the eye and said, “Fuck off,” in my most nonoffensive tone.

  “John!” Lily chided as the troll began to chuckle under his breath.

  “I got this,” I said as I strode past Lily and to the soon-to-be-dead troll. As I got face-to-face with him, I pointed my finger at his chest and was about to open my mouth when the back of his hand struck my face and sent me flying backward. I hit the green ground of the field and began rolling from the inertia. Stars swam in my vision as the world spun around me. I propped up on my elbows, head reeling, and tried to focus on my attacker. I heard a distant cry from somewhere a mile away. It was muffled, but I could make out “ON” was being said. With my noggin feeling like a bobblehead on the dashboard of an off-road jeep, I looked at Lily, who was frantically motioning at me.

  I shook my head once and noticed nothing improved. The world was still spinning and my jaw was beginning to ache something fierce. I lifted a hand off the ground to cup my face and fell to the side. Oh, right—my arm was holding me up.

  I shook my head again, and the world that was spinning slowed and leveled off, becoming still again.

  “John!” I heard Lily frantically cry out. “Get out of the grass!”

  “What?” My words came out slurring and made my face sting with pain. “Like in Jurassic Park?” Something tugged at my coat’s collar, drawing my attention. It was a sprite. A cute, adorable, innocent-looking sprHOLY SHIT IT HAS FANGS. The sprite opened its little mouth much wider than what should have been physically possible and chomped down on my coat, taking a clean chunk out of the durable leather. I gulped. Another fairy of the Disney spelling landed on my boot while two more landed on my pelvis. They looked at me curiously, twitching their innocent little heads, then opened their horrific mouths.

  “NO!” I yelped in panic as I swung my hands wildly at my crotch. I was not about to test the whole not-being-able-to-heal thing on Little John. My swung connected, and the little fairies tumbled through the air, shrieking their tiny rage. I kicked the last one, which had already chomped onto my steel-toed boot, and scrambled to get up. More balls of light swarmed toward me as I sprinted, rather slowly, to where Lily stood. I looked at my legs, which weren’t a blur, and tripped over my own feet. My face smashed into the grass, breaking my sunglasses as I slid.

  “Get up!” Lily yelled in frustration as she stepped into the grass, stomping over to where I was struggling to rise. This pain was all new; sharp and debilitating while my body was sluggish and weak, as if filled with cement. I rose on all fours as Lily approached. I tried getting up, but I was still dazed. She strode over to me and grabbed my trench coat at the collar. I was a kitten in his mama’s jaws as Lily dragged me to the road where the troll remained, arms crossed and a smile on its face.

  “What…just happened?” I asked between pants as something thundered in my ears.

  “You have no power here, John Cook. I told this to you, and you refused to listen, almost getting yourself killed.”

  “Why am I so heavy?” I asked, standing up and looking down at my thick legs.

  “Your body is powered by magic, whether or not you want to believe that simple fact,” Lily scolded like an angry school teacher explaining why I couldn’t eat the glue.

  “But I know how my energy works and why I need blood. I can explain it scientifically—it’s not magic!”

  “Magic is just science we don’t understand yet, while science we do know is still magic. Do you understand?” Lily asked.

  “Not really,” I answered loudly. There was a drum beating close by. How was no one else hearing it?

  “Just because you know how something works doesn’t mean it’s not still magic,” Lily reiterated.

  What she was saying congealed in my brain, changing my lifelong perspective on the concept of what was magic and what was science. I was taken aback by that. This was all too much information at one time for my nonpreternatural brain to handle. First the counterintuitive rules, then the realization that I was Bambi in this plane, followed by the fact that everything I had known to be fact was now in question. I was used to my mind solidifying the information it took in in an instant without having to try and commit anything to memory. I was using an atrophied muscle I hadn’t even thought about since I’d been a mortal on a farm in Ireland. I took in a breath and choked on something warm. My fingers investigated my face, only to pull away covered in blood.

  “What the…” I exhaled in disbelief.

  “As I said, you can’t heal while in Faerie, not even minor wounds, and your nose is broken.”

  “Can I go home now?” I all but whimpered, feeling the blood running over my lips and into my beard.

  In front of us, the troll was shaking from all the mirth he was partaking in as if he were at a chuckle buffet—all you can freaking eat. My fists clenched and Lily placed a tender hand on my shoulder in a gentle warning.

  My Fae companion and guide turned to the troll, stuck out her chest while lifting her nose before saying, “Perhaps you know not with whom you speak, insignificant troll.”

  The troll stiffened while chuffing in anger as it turned to fully face its offender. It gritted its teeth, lifted its hands to grab at a spear on its back, and then froze. A look of confusion crossed its face, followed by one of recognition, before it dropped to its knees while slapping its hands on the ground in a show of submission.

  “Pl-please forgive me,” the troll stammered fearfully. “I didn’t know it was you, Mistress.”

  “Mistress?” I asked with a nasally voice while pinching my nose closed.

  “Later,” Lily whispered.

  “Please, pass undisturbed, Mistress,” the toll troll whined out. As he finished speaking, he crawled on all fours to the side of the road, daring to enter the lush green fields of death.

  “Thank you, my dear,” Lily said as she walked past, a swagger in her steps. I followed closely behind, holding my leaking nose while a strange metallic taste rolled down my throat. It tasted…funny. Like pennies instead of a fine wine.

  “Lily,” I said, “Am I still a vampire here?”

  “Don’t be silly, sweet John. You are still you, just without all the fun extras that you have grown accustomed to in your universe.”

  “That makes sense; I have been accused of being extra before.” A thought struck me. “So this is a different dim—” I started before Lily twirled on her heels to look me dead in the eyes, daring me to finish that sentence. “…u-universe. Different universe. I knew it!”

  “Congratulations, John. Do you want to say the night sky is full of stars next? Both comments would be on the same level of magnitude.”

  “No. I’d like to say ‘the night is dark and full of terrors,’ but that might get me sued.”

  Lily shook her head as she walked just ahead of me.

  “Hey, I could have gone with a Star Wars reference when you said ‘magnitude,’” I said with air quotes. She ignored me as we walked at a fast pace toward a castle in the distance.

  “Is that Oz?”

  “No more movie reference
s,” Lily said.

  “That’s like asking me not to breathe.”

  “You don’t need to breathe. You only do so to make obscure movie references and annoy me.”

  “That’s not true,” I said, feigning hurt feelings. “I annoy everyone equally. I’m an equal opportunity annoyer.”

  “You are doing quite the job right now. Top marks.”

  “I think I need to breathe now, Lily. I don’t like it, but it does feel…kinda good.”

  “Hmm, how interesting,” Lily purred.

  “Seriously, where are we going?” I asked, wanting this to be over.

  “I am taking you to the Seelie Court.”

  When she didn’t continue, I asked, “Why?”

  Sighing heavily like a parent whose child won’t stop asking questions, Lily answered, “So you can tell them about the Shadow Fae that attacked you tonight.”

  “Me? Why me? Won’t they listen to you?” I asked nervously.

  “This is your responsibility. The Seelie Court has reached out to you already and extended friendship, have they not? They will be most curious about the events that unfolded tonight and how they came to pass.”

  “Can’t I just send an email or something?”

  “Your cowardice is a turn off,” Lily said while keeping her gaze forward. That stung, but she was right—I was being a little bitch. Time to man up.

  We walked for an hour or ten minutes—I’m terrible at time management—and the castle grew as we approached. And I didn’t mean in just perspective—it grew.

  The castle was imbedded in a tree that enveloped the sky with its reaching, full branches. The temperature, which had been warm to me, dropped to a pleasant coolness as we entered the shadow of the magnificent tree. It was then I noticed I had been sweating profusely.

  The castle jutted out of the middle of the tree several hundred feet in the air, as if an army of history’s most talented woodworkers had carved it out of the bark. Under the wooden castle, a village—no, a modern city—grew like shrubs on the forest floor. Right angles and buildings as tall as any on the Earthen plane surrounded the tree on multiple levels that swirled upward like a spiral staircase. The closer we came, the higher and wider the tree grew. Every step forward brought the city five steps closer.

  I was aware that Lily had turned her head to view my reaction. “There is more magic in Faerie than you can possibly fathom. It is best to have an open mind and a shut mouth.”

  Normally I would have a wheel of quips in my mind that I would spin and then spit out, but I was in genuine awe of the size of this tree, and I was running out of breath. The tree reached miles into the sky and had a circumference that spanned a proportionate amount in relation to its height.

  At the base of the tree was a gate made out of thick roots that organically opened to reveal a blinding light. As the tendrils slithered away, we stepped into the light and onto a bustling city street. I blinked and turned around to see a waist-high wall carved from the bark, the vine gate having completely disappeared. I nearly tripped over my own feet as I backed away from the ledge that was hundreds of feet above the ground below. I had just been on that ground a few steps ago! Oh, man, I did not like feeling like a mortal almost as much as I did not like green eggs and ham.

  As I backed blindly away from the ledge, I bumped into someone that responded by backhanding me to the ground like a redheaded stepchild.

  “Watch it, fool,” the citizen said, turning his head forward and ignoring me. I stood, fists clenched, and was about to say something when I remembered how easily the troll had overpowered me.

  I inhaled deeply, held it, and whispered, “Three, two, one; one, two, three. What the heck is bothering me?” It helped me gain control but also brought to the surface that I wanted to burn everything around me down. I was scared, and the desire to punish the powerful creatures around me was near overwhelming.

  Between gritted teeth and eyes screwed tight, I whispered to myself, “Control it, John. Use your mind for once.” I opened my eyes and saw the city, but not Lily. Looking around for my companion, I saw a cornucopia of Fae wandering the streets in modern clothing. Most had a rectangular device displaying…were-were they…yes, they were freaking cell phones…in Faerie. I wonder what network they used? Fae Mobile?

  Some citizens had plain T-shirts and baggy pants, while others donned full business suits that glinted like scales in the sunlight. Wait, sunlight? I shielded my eyes with my hand and looked up to see the sun shining through the canopy of lush leaves as if they weren’t there. Though it felt cooler, the light was basically as bright as having direct line of sight.

  “What the…?” I mouthed, “Oh, right—magic.” I lowered my hand and squinted ahead to the upward slope of the city. Lily had mentioned I was to do this alone. She always had to make things difficult for me. Walking toward the castle, I gulped at the thought of what awaited me at the end of the spiraling road.

  All Fae-phones went off at the same time in the equivalent of an Amber Alert. I froze as countless Fae stopped where they stood, looked at their phones, then locked their gazes on me like a lioness identifying the weak gazelle.

  4

  “Hello,” I said lamely as I slowly waved my open hand in a half circle in greeting. The crowd of pointy-eared elves, tusk-mouthed trolls, beautiful nymphs, stubby dwarves, and several other varieties of Fae all glared at me. No one said anything or moved as assessing eyes glided over my vulnerable body.

  Another alert sounded in a cacophonous crescendo that made me feel like I was the star of a horror movie. Eyes shot to screens before returning back to me. Those on the street moved to the sidewalk while never taking their gaze from me. After a moment of standing awkwardly with my back to a wall, I got the hint and stepped onto the road. Glancing up the massive spiral, I located the castle and audibly gulped at the impossible distance.

  “Shiiiiiiiit,” I exhaled in a long breath. I didn’t want to spend another moment around these scary ass denizens. I dropped my head and began walking timidly as heads slowly turned to follow me.

  Following Lily’s advice, I kept my eyes on the ground directly in front of me so as not to accidentally offend anyone, which would equate to full permission to do me harm, right? This was the Seelie Court, wasn’t it? Yeah, it was the Unseelie that could attack for any reason. Why was I having trouble remembering? My brain was operating like it was the middle of the day, but, you know, on the other plane. As I walked the incline, I became increasingly out of breath and my profuse sweating grew to a torrential cascade down my back. My heartbeat thundered in my ears as…wait…the fuck? Breath? Sweat? My heartbeat? Oh God, I was a mortal. WAIT! “Oh God?”

  “What’s happening to me?” I asked myself between heaving breaths.

  My mind raced with the implications of being human again. Even the word felt wrong to use. I looked inward, only to realize that I couldn’t appear in the control room of my mind. I was stuck behind my eyes.

  Dude, what’s going on? I asked my Predatory Self. Silence was my answer. On the precipice of losing my shit, I screamed in my head, PS! DUDE, ARE YOU THERE? YOU CAN’T LEAVE ME ALONE HERE! A breeze blew across the street, kissing my skin and tugging at my trench and hair that spilled out from my beanie. There was no other sound both externally or internally, except for my thudding heartbeat.

  Lily’s words came back into my mind. I was still me, but without the extra stuff. I assumed she meant my vampirism and all the abilities that went with it, including PS. I felt more alone in that moment than I had ever felt in my entire life and unlife combined. It hadn’t occurred to me until that very moment that I relied on PS for both his strength and his companionship. Granted, he didn’t speak much, but that was just fine with me because I sure as hell loved to talk.

  I became light-headed as everything compounded on top of each other, pressing on my chest until I couldn’t breathe.

  BREATHE! I sucked in a lungful of air after realizing I had been holding my breath while deep in
thought. My nose was swollen shut, so I gaped like a fish out of water until my head cleared. I panted heavily before setting my jaw and continuing my journey to the top. My nose had stopped bleeding, but that bitch still throbbed with each pound of my pulsing heart. I was growing tired of this and wanted to go home.

  As I rounded the corner, the castle gates came into view. I screwed up my face in bewilderment and turned around to look over the horizon; I was considerably higher than I had been moments before. Keeping my mind open and mouth shut, I quickly accepted Fae physics by turning back to the castle and making my way toward the enormous gate. A sliver of brilliant light poured from the bottom of the wooden gate as it slowly lifted open. Chains rattled as a door the size of a vertical football field was hoisted into the outside wall of a castle that extended several hundred yards into the blue Faerie sky.

  When the door cleared enough room for my six-foot frame, I crossed the threshold. As I did, the gate stopped and reversed to close again with a ground-shaking thud. My anxiety upped in intensity a notch as I became a bird trapped in a cage.

  “Welcome to Faerie, John,” a familiar voice announced.

  “Taylor!” I greeted my pointy-eared acquaintance. “It’s so freaking good to see a friendly face!”

  “Curious about how you arrived,” Taylor said with a slight crinkle in his brow, “but, it is good to see you too, though it has been quite some time. Come, she is waiting.”

  “Who?”

  “The queen of the Seelie Court,” Taylor said devotedly.

  “Cool,” I drawled out. “Have you seen Lily by any chance?”

  “Pardon?” Taylor asked as he tilted his head and raised one eyebrow.

  “Nothing,” I relented. “What’s this queen’s name?”

  “Queen Tatiana of the Summer Court.”

  “Where have I heard that name before?”

  “Our queen has become well known across your plane due to her affinity for helping humans. There are countless stories about her deeds spanning centuries of your literature.”