had saved her as much as a mother can
whose daughter had saved her by being born
and then left her to save herself
One morning I was sitting in the garden
planning where I would plant the sweet peas
and the tomatoes when the weather changed
I heard someone coming up the hillside
My heart felt the way it did when she was a baby
and I had been away from her for a few hours
maybe she was just napping in the next room
but I hadn’t seen her face or heard her voice for a while
and then she came in or called for me
and I would fly to her
needing her so much, missing her so much
I didn’t try to touch her
She came and sat next to me on the singed wicker chair
“What happened?” I asked her. “Did he hurt you?”
“No. But I’m afraid he will leave me.
There are so many girls all the time.”
“What makes you think he wants any of them?”
“I am not a goddess,” she said. “You are.”
This is what I told her
I have been young too
I have been Psyche, I have been Echo
I have been Eurydice
I have been Persephone, like you
I thought I was not a goddess
My mother was a goddess
Now I am Demeter, like my mother
Because of you
My Demeter tried to save me from Hades
That man you have is Eros too
I let my Eros, your father, leave
because I didn’t think I was enough
But you must remember you are everything
We all are
Psyche means soul
What more is there than that?
Echo never stops her singing
Maybe it was Eurydice’s choice to fade away
when Orpheus looked back
so she did not have to return with him
Persephone is a goddess of the bridge between
light and dark, day and night, death and life
Psyche
Psyche finished her film about a young woman’s quest. It starred her daughter, Joy, and her daughter’s boyfriend, the performance artist. Everyone at the indie festivals loved it. They called it poetry. Psyche thought, if I spend the rest of my life alone, it will be all right. I have my art and I have my daughter back. What more could a woman want? Aging is easier without having to worry about a man.
One day Joy and her boyfriend took Psyche with them to a dance. The room was filled with people flinging their bodies around to live drums in front of an altar covered with stargazer lilies and beeswax candles. Psyche stood alone, motionless in a pale blue sheer chiffon tunic dress covered with sequins that reflected the light. She watched everyone—so young, so abandoned. In the eyes of all the men in the room she was no more visible than Echo to Narcissus. The music had no more power to stop her from getting older than Orpheus had the ability to bring Eurydice back from the dead. She watched her child rolling on the floor, doing backbends and handstands, being lifted into the air.
“Come on, Mom,” Joy said, taking her hand.
They danced together for a while and then Joy danced away but Psyche kept moving. It was easier than she had expected. Soon she forgot herself entirely. She forgot that she was probably the oldest woman in the room. She forgot that she hadn’t danced in years. (Even then it had been mostly alone in her room with her mother’s shadow.) After she had been in motion for a long time Psyche began to feel as if she were sixteen. She wanted to say to all the young women in the room, “When your mothers tell you to love and appreciate your body it isn’t just to get you to shut up. They know that when you are old you are going to feel exactly the same way inside that you do now. We try on different dresses, different selves, but our souls are always the same—ongoing, full of light.”
As she was thinking this, Psyche closed her eyes. A hand was at her waist. She didn’t move but kept swaying to the music, feeling the pressure of the fingertips beneath her rib cage. She remembered how when she was Persephone, Hades had popped a rib out as if trying to get better access to her heart. What would he have done if he had actually held it in his hands? Her breath quickened and her legs lightened. All the blood moved to her chest. But her Hades had not come to claim her.
“Eros,” she said.
When she opened her eyes, he was standing there. Had she conjured him with her dancing? He looked older now; his hair was close-shaven, nearly all gray. There was nothing about him that screamed “ancient power of the cosmos, love god, son of Aphrodite, son of Chaos.” He was a man, getting older, her daughter’s father. He was also her first lover, her secret, her storyteller. And he was a god, yes. But she was a goddess and a storyteller too. A soul in a new dress now.
About the Author
Francesca Lia Block, winner of the prestigious Margaret A. Edwards Award, is the author of many acclaimed and bestselling books, including WEETZIE BAT, DANGEROUS ANGELS: The Weetzie Bat Books, WASTELAND, GUARDING THE MOON, ECHO, THE ROSE AND THE BEAST, and VIOLET & CLAIRE, as well as I WAS A TEENAGE FAIRY, GIRL GODDESS #9, THE HANGED MAN, NECKLACE OF KISSES, and—written with Carmen Staton—RUBY. Her work is published around the world. Visit Francesca online at www.francescaliablock.com
Visit www.AuthorTracker.com for exclusive information on your favorite HarperCollins author.
ALSO BY FRANCESCA LIA BLOCK
Weetzie Bat
Cherokee Bat and the Goat Guys
Missing Angel Juan
Girl Goddess #9: Nine Stories
The Hanged Man
Dangerous Angels: The Weetzie Bat Books
I Was a Teenage Fairy
Violet & Claire
The Rose and The Beast
Echo
Guarding the Moon
Wasteland
Goat Girls: Two Weetzie Bat Books
Beautiful Boys: Two Weetzie Bat Books
Necklace of Kisses
Credits
Cover art © 2006 by Greg Spalenka
Cover design by Neil Swaab
Copyright
PSYCHE IN A DRESS. Copyright © 2006 by Francesca Lia Block. All rights reserved under International and Pan-American Copyright Conventions. By payment of the required fees, you have been granted the non-exclusive, non-transferable right to access and read the text of this e-book on-screen. No part of this text may be reproduced, transmitted, down-loaded, decompiled, reverse engineered, or stored in or introduced into any information storage and retrieval system, in any form or by any means, whether electronic or mechanical, now known or hereinafter invented, without the express written permission of HarperCollins e-books.
ePub edition April 2008 ISBN 9780061757020
10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1
About the Publisher
Australia
HarperCollins Publishers (Australia) Pty. Ltd.
25 Ryde Road (PO Box 321)
Pymble, NSW 2073, Australia
http://www.harpercollinsebooks.com.au
Canada
HarperCollins Publishers Ltd.
55 Avenue Road, Suite 2900
Toronto, ON, M5R, 3L2, Canada
http://www.harpercollinsebooks.ca
New Zealand
HarperCollinsPublishers (New Zealand) Limited
P.O. Box 1
Auckland, New Zealand
http://www.harpercollinsebooks.co.nz
United Kingdom
HarperCollins Publishers Ltd.
77-85 Fulham Palace Road
London, W6 8JB, UK
http://www.harpercollinsebooks.co.uk
United States
HarperCollins Publishers Inc.
10 East 53rd Street
New York, NY 10022
http://www.harpercollinsebooks.com
Table of Contents
Cover
Title Page
Dedication
Contents
Psyche
Echo
Narcissus
Eurydice
Orpheus
The Maenad
Hades
Persephone
Psyche as a Dress
Eros
Demeter
Psyche
About the Author
ALSO BY FRANCESCA LIA BLOCK
Credits
Copyright
About the Publisher
Psyche in a Dress Page 6