by AG Meiers
“I think anyone who ever had to pull their life back together after losing someone they love understands that.”
Jayden turned away from him. His body was ridged and his breath uneven. Without much thinking, Sven stood and put his hands on Jayden’s shoulders, feeling the tension in his muscles. He hated to see anybody in pain, and Jayden had lost the only person in the world who had truly cared about him. Now, he had nobody.
After a few tense seconds, Jayden let out a whispered sigh and leaned back. Sven slowly wrapped his arms around Jayden, whose body went limp as he melted into the embrace. Sven couldn’t help the ridiculous thought that Jayden fit perfectly into his arms. Madness! Jayden’s head was tucked under his chin, and Jayden’s soft hair tickled his jaw. In the end, it was Jayden who eventually stepped away to wash the dishes. Sven hadn’t wanted to let go of him.
Outside, the rain pounded against the roof and the wind rattled the small windows, so there was no way to escape the cabin and the closeness. And Sven wasn’t sure he even wanted to escape. Jayden was creeping under his skin. There were so many unanswered questions, but instead of pushing for responses, Sven wanted to pull Jayden into his arms, peel off his clothes, and take him to bed. He was so fucking screwed.
Once they had cleaned up the kitchen, Jayden looked through the bookcase and asked Sven for a recommendation. They settled down, Sven reading the magazine he’d gotten to research his latest freelance article and Jayden crawling into bed with his book. Thankfully, Jayden fell asleep as quickly as all the other nights, leaving Sven to draw up his own list of pros and cons for the job in Vancouver. Usually, he didn’t struggle so much with making a decision. Still, talking to Jayden had clarified a few things. He wanted to settle down. Buy a house. Get a dog. A puppy. In the dark of the cabin, Sven could admit to himself that in his last job up north he’d been fucking lonely and hadn’t been able to muster up the energy to do anything about it. He didn’t want that again.
After a while, Jayden took over Sven’s thoughts completely. Courageous with a hint of steel, Jayden hadn’t backed down until he’d made his point. He’d found the right words to push Sven into looking at his actions from a different angle.
Only a few days ago, Sven had been dead certain that he had his life under control and was making all the right decisions. Now Jayden had crashed into his world, challenging him to dig deeper and be a little more honest with himself.
And maybe that candor was just what he needed.
Perfect Match Commitment #7:
Prince online? Frog in real life? Not with us!
Jayden woke up with Sven’s erection pressing hard against his butt. Sven was breathing heavily against his shoulder, left hand stroking his hip, and he was pushing against him with soft, irregular humps. A husky whimper escaped Jayden’s lips. Sven’s touch sent thrills like shooting stars through his body. Jayden tried to stay still under his hold, savoring the moment. God, he wanted Sven so much, but he’d resigned himself to the fact Sven wasn’t interested in him. Obviously he’d been wrong.
It’s going to happen. Finally. But he hadn’t taken a shower . . . And no lube. No, wrong order: take a shower, wash ass, lube, prep. The list rattled in Jayden’s head. Jackson had given him specific instructions. This was not good. Maybe he could get Sven to stop, and quickly run to the bathroom. If he rushed, he could probably be back in under fifteen minutes.
Yeah, right! That sounded totally reasonable. Normal people always started a sexual encounter in the middle of the night with, Hey, man, can you hold this thought while I run to the bathroom for my four-step pre-sex prep? Will only take fifteen minutes, just keep yourself primed.
Jayden’s mind swirled with so many messed-up thoughts that he almost missed when Sven stopped pushing his dick against him. Sven still held him tight though, and his hand moved slowly across Jayden’s belly. Jayden tried to control his rapid breathing and crazy-fast heartbeat. Tentatively, he wiggled a little deeper into Sven’s embrace, loving the feel of strong arms wrapped around him. Just like earlier tonight at dinner when Sven had offered silent comfort. Jayden had been this close to throwing himself at Sven, and if there had been any indication from Sven that he would welcome Jayden’s advances, they could have gotten to this point much earlier.
The dim light of the cabin helped him get a hold of his freaked-out mind. For once the rain wasn’t pounding on the roof. The night was still, and he could hear crickets chirping outside. Pale-gray light came through the windows, mixing with the golden glow of the embers in the fireplace. For a few minutes, Jayden let himself get lost in the moment.
His dick didn’t need any elaborate prep. No, Sven’s erection against his butt did the trick. Sven started to move again, and Jayden couldn’t stop the low moan that escaped him. He pressed closer against Sven and tried to find a rhythm.
Sven mumbled something unintelligible against his shoulder. His hand jerked across Jayden’s belly. Then he stopped. There was a low snoring sound . . . Wait, what? A snore?
“Sven, are you sleep humping me?” Jayden pushed Sven off slightly and turned to face him. It was almost too dark to see, but by now it was pretty clear that Sven was sleeping. Before he could stop himself a small, hysterical giggle escaped.
“Oh my God. You are sleeping.” Another huff of laugher broke free. Jayden pressed his hand against his mouth to stop himself, but it was too late. Sven stirred next to him, his eyes blinking open.
There was a moment of tense silence, and then Sven’s sleep-drunk mind seemed to catch up.
“Jayden. Fuck. I’m sorry. Are you okay? Did I just . . .”
“Naw, you just humped me a little.”
Sven groaned.
“Must have been a hell of a dream. Shame I wasn’t there.” Jayden smiled, trying to ease Sven’s embarrassment.
“Well . . . actually . . . you were there.” Sven’s answer in the dark room tilted Jayden’s world on its head again. His heart missed a few beats and then went into overdrive, pounding hard against his rib cage.
“Sven, we don’t have to stop, you know. We’re grown-ups. If you want . . . we could . . .” Jayden couldn’t believe his own words, but he meant it. He wanted to be closer to Sven. Wanted to feel Sven’s warm body all over him.
The silence between them seemed to drag out forever. Sven didn’t move, and the tiny bit of hope that he wanted Jayden shriveled and died. Suddenly Sven pulled him close, and Jayden couldn’t suppress a surprised gasp. Sven’s lips started to explore his neck. Gently, Sven moved down his throat and then back up to the sensitive skin behind his ear.
“You’re sure?” Sven whispered between licks and soft kisses.
“Oh yeah,” Jayden whimpered. “More. Please. More.”
He turned his head to catch Sven’s lips and wrapped his arms around Sven’s body. Sven’s lips were soft. The contrast with the scratch of the beard sent shivers down Jayden’s spine. He couldn’t hold back another moan. So good. He opened to Sven’s slow and deliberate exploration. For a moment they got lost kissing.
Jayden let out a breathless whimper in protest when Sven pulled back, breaking their kiss, but Sven brushed a thumb over Jayden’s lips.
“We can go slow. Whatever you like. We don’t have to rush.”
Instead of answer, Jayden pulled his T-shirt over his head. No more delays. He wanted to rush. He finally had Sven close. For days now, Sven had teased him with his perfect body and all this rugged manliness. Jayden needed to touch his Viking warrior. Now.
“I want you. Don’t stop. Please, Sven.”
Sven shifted them around, so that Jayden was on his back and Sven leaned over him, slowly kissing a trail along his neck to his collarbone. Jayden almost wanted to ask if Sven liked what he saw, but it was pretty dark in the cabin with only a little light from the fireplace. Some verbal assurance would feel good right now though. Without his shirt, Jayden felt exposed and vulnerable. A few more kisses down, and Sven would feel his ribs. He was so damn skinny. Sven had commented on it
before. Any second he would stop and turn away. Stupid. Stupid. Why am I so insecure?
Then Sven’s lips touched his right nipple, kissing, gently sucking, and Jayden’s back arched off the mattress. His body was one hundred percent on board. Hard. Aching. Needy. But his brain wouldn’t shut off. Was he being too passive? Maybe he should take more initiative. Before he could put the thought into action though, Sven’s hand slid lower, curving around Jayden’s raging hard-on. Wanton moans rushed forward as the touch sent sparks through his body.
With three quick moves, Sven had stripped Jayden down and torn off his own shirt. He pulled Jayden close, skin to skin, as he continued his explorations down Jayden’s body.
Jayden wanted this badly. Yeah, his mind had trouble letting go, but at the same time it all felt right. Warm. Safe. Everything. He was breathless, whimpering, moaning. Jayden never was this noisy during sex, but Sven’s touch felt so good.
“Oh God, you need this bad, more than I do.” Sven started to stroke him softly. “I’ll take care of you, baby, I promise.”
Perfect Match Commitment #8:
All matches go through thorough personal background screening. We make sure your love is real and your experience is safe.
Jayden twitched under Sven’s touch, his moans and whimpers filling the silence of the night. Yes, Sven could feel Jayden wanted—no, needed this badly, and there was no way Sven would stop exploring his naked body now. City Boy was irresistible. Defined muscles covered with skin so smooth and soft, Sven lost himself in Jayden’s touch and the way he erratically thrusted against Sven. But, every now and then, Jayden stiffened ever so slightly beneath him and Sven faltered. Was he going too fast? A bit of frantic desperation clung to the whole encounter. Sven forced himself to slow down. He stroked Jayden’s jawline and squinted to see his face in the half-dark cabin.
Jayden’s lips were moving. Sven could barely see in the dim light of the dying fire, but there was no doubt. Completely silently, Jayden was having a whole conversation with himself while Sven was already drowning in Jayden’s scent, a mix of vanilla mingling with the musky saltiness of fresh sweat. He longed to lose control, but if he was going over the ledge, hell, he would make sure Jayden was right there beside him. No need to rush. He had time to figure out what Jayden needed to let go.
“Jayden, listen, what do you like?”
“Don’t stop.”
Sven couldn’t help but smile at the muddled, husky nonanswer. “Bossy,” He whispered as he pressed another kiss against Jayden’s lips. “I promise I won’t. I’ll make you fly, but first tell me what I’m doing wrong?”
Jayden froze completely under him. Well, shit, that hadn’t been his intention. Sven just had wanted to make sure he wasn’t moving too fast or doing something Jayden wasn’t comfortable with. Uncertain what to do, he gently stroked down Jayden’s back.
Abruptly, Jayden came to life again. He buried his head in Sven’s shoulder, and his arms and legs wrapped around Sven like a vise.
“Jay, I promise—”
“Too skinny.”
Sven had almost missed Jayden’s words. “What? Oh, babe.” He couldn’t help the huff of laughter. “Okay, so I’m pretty sure you don’t mean me, right?”
That finally got Jayden’s attention. His head flew up from its hiding spot. Even in the dark, Sven could see the deep frown. Jayden lightly punched his shoulder. An odd act of defiance breaking through his insecurity.
“No, of course not. You’re gorgeous.”
“How do you know? It’s so fucking dark here.” Sven quickly untangled himself from Jayden, got out of bed, and crossed the cabin. He added more kindling and wood to the embers, which would relight the fire in a few minutes.
Jayden was half sitting up when he got back to the bed, and Sven pulled him into a kiss. Jayden hesitated for a second, but then threw himself into it with the same abandon that had sent sparks of arousal through Sven before. It took all his willpower to break their kiss to whisper, “Let me look at you.”
Jayden sprawled out in Sven’s bed. His skin flushed. Pupils blown wide. His lips red and slightly swollen from their intense kissing. Sven didn’t even have to think about words, they came by themselves. “You are beautiful. Magical. And I want all of you.”
Jayden let out a ragged moan, and Sven’s control finally snapped. His painfully hard cock jumped to attention as he kicked off his pants. His hands traveled over Jayden’s lower back and his ass, and he nearly lost it again when Jayden’s cock touched his own. God, yes, so good. Sven pushed closer and wrapped his hand around Jayden’s erection. Jayden broke the kiss to gasp for air, his eyes wide.
“You okay? If you want me to stop, just say the word.” Sven had to make sure. One last time.
“No, don’t stop!” Jayden thrust hard into Sven’s fist, sending electric currents though Sven’s body. “No!” he said again. Sven tried to move back slightly, but Jayden blocked his retreat by slinging one leg around him and holding him close. “Sven, please, don’t stop. I want this. I want you.” His voice was laced with desire and need.
There was no way Sven could stop now. Jayden was clinging to him, his body shaking and his mouth kissing and licking Sven’s collarbone.
“I got you,” Sven whispered. The intensity of his promise surprised him. But nothing with Jayden was ever casual. Jayden was layers of emotions boiling under the surface, ready to burst out and sweep Sven away.
Sven pulled Jayden into a tight embrace. He reached around and let his finger slide between Jayden’s ass cheeks. He pushed one finger into him dry, just an inch. The sudden penetration sent Jayden flying. He turned into liquid fire in Sven’s arms, thrusting, whimpering, moaning. His fingernails clawed into Sven’s back and scraped along his shoulders.
“Christ, Jayden, you are so fucking beautiful.”
“Oh God, yes, Sven. More. You feel . . . Please . . .” Jayden whispered before he crushed his lips against Sven’s.
With some regret, Sven pulled his hand back from Jayden’s ass. He’d need lube to take this any further and both were too far gone to deal with that now. Instead he wrapped his hand around their cocks. Jayden’s breath against his shoulder made Sven shiver as they settled into a rhythm. The feeling was incredible. Sven couldn’t remember the last time another man had made him this aroused. Every one of Jayden’s whispered moans, every thrust sliding their cocks together, drove him further into oblivion and bliss.
Jayden bucked wildly and then froze. Clinging to Sven, his body trembled. His cock pulsed against Sven’s as he came. It pushed Sven over the edge. His vision blurred, his head jerked back as muscles tightened and his own orgasm rocked through him. And it seemed to last forever, until he finally, still breathing hard and completely spent, collapsed against Jayden’s sweat-drenched body. Aftershocks tore through him, making any coherent thought impossible. Jayden didn’t seem to mind Sven’s inability to think or move though; if anything, he pressed closer into Sven’s embrace.
When he had recovered enough to move again, Sven gently pulled Jayden into a lazy, sloppy kiss. Jayden met him with a low sigh and a smile, which made Sven’s heart somersault in his chest.
“We’re a mess,” Jayden whispered against Sven’s cheek.
“Don’t mind.”
With another happy sigh, Jayden snuggled into Sven’s arms. They lapsed into comfortable, post-sex bliss, Jayden tucked into his embrace and their legs tangled up under the quilt.
Sven had almost dozed off when Jayden moved. He heard him mumbling something, but only caught “too cold.” The bed bounced a little as Jayden scrambled off and slipped into the bathroom.
After a few minutes, Jayden came back, and he dashed over to the fireplace to add wood. Sven lifted half off the bed. “I should have done that.”
“No, let me take care of you, okay? I’d like to.” Jayden crawled back into bed with a washcloth and a towel and gently washed Sven’s chest and abdomen. He moved the cloth in slow, deliberate circles. Didn’t linger. Didn’t
turn it into anything sexual. Just cleaned up. It was the same focused intensity he showed when he was baking cookies, listening to Elliot’s old stories about logging, or folding his clothes to make them fit onto the shelf. Jayden’s way to approach the world around him—with care and order.
Sven’s skin broke out in goose bumps as he clenched his jaw. Emotions rushed through him like a forest fire in a dry season. Too powerful. Too much. Every stroke over his heated body sent tremors through him. His chest tightened. It was difficult to breathe.
Jayden made him feel . . . special? Treasured? And strangely vulnerable. It scared the shit out of him. Because if he gave in to this moment now, it would be hard to live without this feeling again. He couldn’t remember ever experiencing anything like it with another man. Goddamn. How had Jayden done this? How did he make Sven want things he hadn’t known he was missing in his life? A shiver went through Sven, and it was hard to lie still and not to pull Jayden down on top of him—to completely surround himself with Jayden, which was stupid and insane as Sven’s body was twice the size of his. Fuck. This was crazy. And new and different. Jayden was different.
Jayden finished, and after dumping the wet towel in the bathroom, he turned off the light and climbed back into bed. Another sigh, and then his long legs pressed against Sven’s under the blanket and he whispered, “Good night.”
Sven listened to Jayden’s breathing slow down as he dozed off. Eventually, with the soft exhales against Sven’s neck, and Jayden’s personal mix of sweetness and vulnerability swirling all around, Sven fell asleep as well.
Waking up next to Jayden was as peaceful as falling asleep with his warm body by him. Sven was a morning person, so he wasn’t surprised to find that Jayden was still sleeping deeply.
For once Jayden wasn’t curled into a little ball under the thick, heavy blanket, but stretched out along Sven’s body—his breathing even, his long lashes resting on his cheeks, and his face and mouth pressed softly against Sven’s shoulder as if he hadn’t moved at all in the night.