And then Corrigan was there at the other end. I wanted to thank him for staying, for supporting my crazy plan but, as soon as I looked into those blue eyes, I struggled to get the words out. He’d lost that cocky hardness for a second and was looking at me with such a mix of lust and longing….
“Let’s move!” said Bartell.
We pushed the gurneys out to the ambulance bay and—
I let out a shuddering gasp as the cold hit me. The temperature had plummeted and a bitter wind was howling, lashing our exposed skin. The snow hadn’t started yet, but it was close.
We pushed the gurneys into the waiting ambulances and handed the charts to the paramedics. They raced away the second we had the doors shut. A steady stream of cars started to roar out of the underground parking garage: everyone was desperate to get out of town before we got cut off.
All seven of us clustered around Bartell as he started to speak. “We’ve done all we can,” he said. “We’re down to six critical patients. I figure we can cope with that. So it comes down to what traumas come in over the next few days.” He looked around at us. “If we’re lucky, the worst we’ll get is a couple of sprained ankles from people slipping on the ice.”
I really hoped so. Because it was sinking in that our little group was now all that our town had. Whatever came in, we’d have to deal with it. I wouldn’t just be doing consults, I’d be one of the ER docs, right in the middle of the chaos with patients’ lives in my hands.
I felt someone looking at me. I turned and the look in Corrigan’s eyes sent a deep, hot pulse straight down my body. I was going to have to do this working right alongside him, both of us fighting to resist….
As the last cars tore away, a fresh blast of wind hit us, even colder than before. For the first time in hours, I had time to look up at the sky.
The sheer size of the clouds was terrifying. Gray-white, they were piled deeper than I’d ever seen and they filled the sky from horizon to horizon, spreading rapidly to block out the last scraps of blue. And below them, an impenetrable curtain of white. This wasn’t weather like I’d ever seen it. This was on a whole different scale: our little town felt like a child’s toy, helpless against what was coming. I watched as the last cars disappeared into the distance. They’d made it out with minutes to spare. The fear rose up inside me, colder even than the wind. What are we still doing here? What the hell have I done?
I was suddenly aware of something warm and comforting. I looked down and saw Corrigan’s hand holding mine.
The wind rose to a shriek that hurt our ears. The curtain of white raced towards us.
“God help us,” muttered Bartell. He hurried us inside and slammed the doors.
And the blizzard hit us.
17
Amy
SNOW, to me, was soft flakes falling slowly from the sky and kids trying to catch them on their tongues. This was nothing like that. Nothing like anything I’d ever experienced.
A howling, shrieking wind had wrapped itself around the hospital, shaking the windows and blasting into every tiny crack to spread its cold. The snow didn’t fall, it blew horizontally and swirled until the flakes seemed to come from every direction, plastering the windows and drifting up against the doors. As the blizzard engulfed us, Mount Mercy gradually disappeared from view. First the mountains faded out. Then the street my house was on. Then the lights of Main Street started to vanish one by one: the bakers, the cafe, the bar….
And then, quite suddenly, all I could see was swirling white. White-out, Krista had called it. It was as if the rest of the world had disappeared.
I walked over to the doors, transfixed. I wasn’t planning to go out. I just wanted to see it up close. But when the automatic doors slid open ahead of me, I kept going, gazing around me in disbelief.
The wind was the first shock. It was so strong it sent me staggering sideways and so bitterly cold it went straight through my scrubs and clawed at my bones. The howl of it was deafening and it rose and fell, always changing, making it difficult to think. I felt my surgical cap lift and then it was gone, carried away into the white.
And the snow... the snow wasn’t like I’d known other years, light and full of air. This was thick and heavy, plastering one whole side of my body from ankle to cheek as the wind pelted it against me. Where it hit cloth, it started to melt and soak in, icy water stealing my body heat. Where it hit skin, I went numb. It filled my vision in every direction: I couldn’t see more than six feet. It would be terrifyingly easy to get lost.
Already, parked cars and fire hydrants were featureless, soft-edged snow models. The pavement was white, the road markings invisible. I could just make out the glow of headlights in the distance as a few drivers who’d been caught outside crawled towards home. But aside from them, not a thing was moving. Not even me: I’d stumbled to a stop. The deafening howl of the wind in my ears and the endless white everywhere I looked, combined with my head throbbing so hard with cold that I couldn’t think... something about it made my brain misfire like an engine that’s starved of fuel. I just stood there, dazed.
Until a hand grabbed my shoulder and spun me around. I stumbled and strong hands grabbed my upper arms, steadying me. “What the hell are you doing out here, you daft feckin’ mare?!”
I looked up into blue eyes that were gleaming with fury and molten with need.
18
Dominic
I WAS SO angry with her, I was going to….
What do you call it when you’re absolutely livid with someone and all you want to do is kiss them?
She stared up at me, coming out of her daze. “I just…” She blinked and flushed. “I just wanted to see.”
“You’ll catch your death, you bloody eejit!” I leaned close to make sure I was heard over the wind. And that made it even harder because she was inches from me, looking like some sort of snow queen with all that soft, pale skin and those blue eyes. The stupid cap was gone and her hair had blown loose, plastered damply to her cheek and neck on one side, flying out on the other as the wind caught it. Without thinking, I pushed my fingers through it to comb it back off her ear so she could hear me better. And the feel of her, her skin so cold and her vivid, copper hair dusted with snow, damp against my warm fingers...she was just so fragile, so vulnerable….
I cursed and picked her up. Just scooped one arm under the backs of her legs and the other under her back and hoisted her up against my chest. That woke her up. “What are you—Corrigan!” she squeaked.
I ignored her. Carried her back through the automatic door and right to the center of the ER, out of the draft. And I tried not to think about the way she felt against me, the side of her breast pillowed against my pec. Dammit, Beckett….
I set her down and she staggered, huffing with indignation and blowing hair out of her face. People were looking at us and she didn’t seem to like being the center of attention. “You didn’t have to—”
“It’s too cold for messing around,” I told her. And I meant it. Even after just a few minutes, she was soaked through from the snow and her skin was bone white. Anyone caught outside in that weather would be dead in a matter of hours. I grabbed her hands and they were like blocks of ice. I pressed them between my palms to warm them.
I scowled at her and she glared at me, still trying to comb her damp hair back off her face. But now that she was out of danger, we were both calming down. Maybe I overreacted, picking her up. I didn’t regret it, though. She gave one last huff of anger, finally got her hair out of her face and—
And then we were gazing into each other’s eyes again. Damn you, woman. What am I going to do with you? My whole world seemed to narrow down to the little droplet of melted snow on her soft lower lip.
“Thank you,” she muttered.
“Didn’t want our only surgeon getting frostbitten fingers,” I told her.
“Thank you for staying, too.”
I wasn’t expecting that one. I tried to shrug and look away, but I couldn’t let go of thos
e eyes. How was it that I could fool every other woman I met and not her? She said she was weird, but she asked the questions other people wouldn’t, the ones that cut straight through all my bullshit. I finally managed to break her gaze and looked down at my feet. “It was the right thing to do,” I said.
I let go of her hands. Then—I couldn’t stop myself—I brushed some of the snow out of her hair. And as soon as I touched her again, she gave this tiny little intake of breath and I had to pull my hands back and make fists or I would have just grabbed her and—
“Just be careful, Beckett!” I muttered. And walked away.
19
Amy
AS I STOOD THERE staring at his retreating back, Krista bounded up. “What was that? And don’t say you were just talking. Or that he ‘might be interested.’ If he was any more interested, you’d be pregnant.”
I shook my head. “I don’t know.” And it was the truth. Just that morning, he’d pushed me away, but when he’d looked at me just now, when he’d picked me up and carried me in, it was like I was the most important thing in his world. In the bar, I’d been one hundred percent, cast-iron sure that I wasn’t going to get involved with a cocky, shallow womanizer. Now the only thing I was sure of was that Dominic Corrigan wasn’t what he appeared.
* * *
The ER stayed blessedly quiet for most of the morning. We had a guy come in with whiplash after he’d run into another car in the snow and an old lady who’d gotten caught outside and was close to hypothermia. I just hoped it stayed that way. If we had traumas come in, if it became a mad, panicked rush... my insides contracted into a dark, cold ball at the thought. I didn’t belong in the ER. I was used to careful planning and precision. Having someone’s life in my hands and not having time to think... what if I screw up? What if I freeze?
I decided to operate on Rebecca’s leg while it was quiet. I sat by her bedside as Lina prepared the anesthetic.
“Will my parents be here when I wake up?” asked Rebecca.
My chest contracted. The poor kid. “I’m sorry. The snow might last a while. But they’ll be here as soon as they can.
She suddenly grabbed my hand. “But you will be, right?”
I blinked down at her and started to say something, but there was suddenly a huge lump in my throat. “Of course,” I managed.
“Count backwards from ten for me,” said Lina.
I sat there in silence as Rebecca counted, that protective urge welling up in me again. She’s my responsibility. I was the world’s least suitable person for the job. I have no idea how to be a mom! But I knew I’d better figure it out fast because, for as long as we were cut off, I was the closest to a mom she had.
“She’s under,” said Lina.
I swallowed and looked down at the sleeping face with its blonde curls. I don’t normally get to know my patients. I meet them for maybe a minute or two before the operation. This was going to be like operating on my own child.
“Amy, you okay?” asked Krista.
I nodded. “Fine,” I said, my voice tight. “Let’s do this.”
* * *
Four hours later, I staggered out of the OR. Krista slapped me on the back but I was too mentally exhausted to do more than nod and weakly pat her. Holy shit. The operation had gone perfectly but I’d had to work with all those new feelings flooding through me. Rebecca would be fine, but I was an emotional wreck.
I tried to call her parents to give them an update, but the hospital phone had no dial tone. I ventured downstairs to the ER in case it was just our floor, but when I got there, I found Maggie talking to Bartell. “Every phone’s dead,” she was telling him. “And it’s not just us. I walked down the street and the whole town’s the same. The wind must have brought down the phone lines.”
I hurried off towards the locker room to get my cell phone. Then had to pull up short when Corrigan stepped out of an exam room, right into my path. We came to a stop with our sneakers touching, my breasts a hair’s breadth from brushing his chest. I opened my mouth to apologize, but when I looked up and saw his face, that was forgotten.
He looked exhausted. His scrubs were soaking wet in places and there was still a little snow in his hair. But he looked happy. Not that fake, loud happiness he’d shown at the bar, his party persona. He looked satisfied. Fulfilled. For just a moment, that sadness I always saw in his eyes was gone. “What happened to you?” I asked.
He sighed and grinned. “A lady pulled up right outside the doors. Went out to see why she wasn’t getting out of her car, turned out she was nine months pregnant.”
I caught my breath. Obstetrics was shut down! Everything was shut down! “What happened?”
A baby’s cry came from the exam room. “Well, she’s not pregnant anymore.”
Now I knew why he looked so happy. A stupid grin broke across my face. “You delivered it?”
“Taylor helped.” He kept looking towards the exam room and his grin matched mine. The baby’s cry died away and it sounded as if it was feeding. Corrigan’s grin grew even wider.
Emotion welled up inside me, hot and powerful. It was something about the look on his face, the fact he could be so big and strong and still be so...doting. And between that and what had happened upstairs with Rebecca, I suddenly felt a wild rush of hormones. He’d make a great father.
“You okay, Beckett?”
I realized I was staring. “Yep.” And I told him about Rebecca coming through the operation well, and wanting to call her folks.
He reached into his pocket and handed me his cell phone. “Use mine.”
I thanked him and got out of there before I did anything else weird. What’s wrong with me? Ever since I’d met him, I was discovering whole new parts of myself. I’d never wanted kids before because I didn’t think I’d make a good mother. But now….
I shook my head and called Rebecca’s folks, who were still stuck in a motel waiting for the roads to clear. Her mom broke down when I told her that Rebecca had had another operation, but I managed to reassure them that everything was okay. “We’ll monitor her closely, but she should be fine. She may need an operation on her kidneys at some point, but that can wait until we can get her to a specialist unit.”
“God bless you, Doctor Beckett,” said Rebecca’s mom with feeling.
“You’re welcome,” I managed. I wasn’t used to this stuff. I stayed in the OR so I didn’t have to meet patients. I was starting to see how much I’d been missing out on.
As I ended the call, I realized something felt different. The howling wind had been so constant, it had almost become background noise, but now it had died away. And there was no movement outside the windows: the snow had stopped. I ran over to the main doors to get a first look at what the blizzard had left.
Drifts were waist-deep along the sidewalks and cars were buried up to the tops of their tires. As I got closer, I triggered the automatic sliding doors and a blast of air rushed in. It was cold like I’d never felt it: it actually sent me stumbling back a few steps in shock. God, the air felt like ice water, it soaked right through your clothes! I wrapped my arms around myself and ventured as far as the doors.
Snow had drifted up against them, almost hip-deep: we’d have to shovel it aside to get patients in and out. I tried poking it with my sneaker and I couldn’t believe how thick and dense it was, as much ice as snow. The hills and forests that led up to the mountain were covered, too, the branches of the pine trees laden with blankets of white.
Icicles hung from every roof and windows and windshields were frosted with ice. Some of the strings of fairy lights that lit up Main Street at night were hanging limply down, their wires snapped by the weight of the ice that had formed on them. No wonder the phone lines were down. We were lucky we still had power.
Shivering, I stepped back to let the doors close and went to find Corrigan. When I couldn’t find him anywhere in the ER, I pushed open the door of the locker room and—
I was looking at glistening, tanned abs. My gaze
slowed to a crawl as it rode each hard ridge: up and down and up...and then it locked onto a drop of water that was sliding down the hard valley of his centerline, following it past his navel, down to his—
“For fuck’s sake, Beckett, in or out,” said the very naked Corrigan.
Without thinking, I stepped forward and the door swung closed behind me. We were maybe six feet apart. He was still dripping wet and steam from the shower was wrapped like a lover around his body, every inch of tan skin gleaming. All the parts of him I’d dreamed about—fantasized about—were right there, perfectly displayed. The chest, so wide and strong, his curving pecs crested by pink nipples the size of silver dollars. The upper arms, even bigger than they’d looked beneath his scrubs, his tattoos shining as if the ink was still wet. I saw what the snake tail was, now: it led up to a staff and wound around it before turning its head back to glare at the viewer. A Caduceus, the symbol of medicine, but styled more like a biker tattoo. And he really did have circular scars that might be from bullets, one on his left pec and two low down on his side, and a long, thin knife scar across his abdomen.
His wide shoulders and tight waist formed a V, an arrow pointing downward, and my eyes obeyed. They found the deep line of his adonis belt and followed it along, past his thickly-muscled thigh, to—
My fantasy had been eerily accurate. Big. Thick and long, the head satiny and—
I forced my eyes up to his face. He gave me the wickedest grin I’d ever seen.
I stared at the ceiling. “I just came to give you your phone back.”
Out of the corner of my eye, I saw him nodding, utterly relaxed in his nakedness. “Throw me a towel, would you?”
I grabbed a towel off the pile and tossed it over to him, then tried to keep my eyes on his face while he toweled himself off. But my gaze seemed to keep drifting down, following his hands as they rubbed the little jewels of moisture from his chest...his abs...his—
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