After it was all over, Taycee found Miles by the lockers in the back. She gave him a long hug goodbye. “Thank you, Miles. For everything. There are amazing things in store for you, I know it.”
Miles’s hands trailed down her arms. “It was great seeing you one last time, but I’ve gotta head back and get myself ready for a rodeo next week.”
“I hope you win.”
He chuckled. “Yeah, that would sure be awesome.”
“Good luck to you.”
His finger grazed her chin. “Chin up. Everything is going to work out just fine.”
“I hope you’re right.”
One last hug and Miles walked out the door. Jake was nowhere in sight, so Taycee grabbed her purse from a nearby locker and headed out the back door and into the bright, sunny Denver morning.
“Taycee, wait up,” Jake called from behind.
Taycee stopped and turned around. “I thought you’d already gone.”
“I had to sneak away to take a quick phone call.”
“Oh. Well, good,” said Taycee. “I want to thank you again. You didn’t have to come here today and take my side, and yet you did.”
Jake nodded. “You still look worried.”
He was far too perceptive. “Probably because I am worried. I feel like a failure. He didn’t even give me a chance to explain, which was the main reason I showed up here today.”
Jake leaned against his car. “Oh, I don’t think Shelter’s going anywhere anytime soon. As warped as it is, people love a good drama, and Miles and I were able to get in enough of an explanation that the viewers will understand. They might surprise you.”
Taycee let out a breath and folded her arms. “How can you be so nice to me? If I were you, I’d want to get as far away from me as I could.”
“Don’t think the idea hasn’t crossed my mind,” Jake joked. “But I’ve come to realize that maybe we aren’t the best fit after all, so maybe this is a good thing. While you’re content to live in the small town of Shelter Springs, I like the bustle of Sacramento and all the travelling I get to do. You like kite wars while I’m more of a symphony and Broadway type of guy. In the end, we’d probably drive each other nuts.”
Taycee touched his arm as she studied him. Tall. Smart. Good-looking. Heart of gold. A guy who’d won everyone over with his charm and genuine nature. He’d even given the farmers a bigger reason to hope.
“There’s someone way better for you out there, Jake, I know it. Someone who actually deserves you.”
“I’m sure there is.” Jake smiled, but it started and ended with his lips.
“I’m going to miss you.”
“And I’ll miss you.” He gave her a lingering look, and then dug into his pocket for his keys.
Taycee wanted to throw her arms around him for one last hug, just to show him how much his friendship meant to her. But she clasped her fingers together instead and forced her arms to remain by her side. It was time to let Jake go so that he could move on with his life.
Just like it was time for her to track down Luke so that she could move on with hers.
New message from Taycee: Where are you, Luke? Please call me! We need to talk.
Luke’s thumb hovered over the reply button for a second, and then he deleted the message, just like he had the few others she’d sent before it. He wasn’t ready to open that door just yet—not while he was still in Ohio. It had been an exhausting few days, and he was emotionally spent. Watching a good friend get buried while his family stood by and sobbed wasn’t an experience he ever wanted to repeat.
Everything around him still felt subdued and gray, as though some of the life had been sucked out of the house. A wife was now without a husband, a daughter without a father, and two parents without a son.
Luke tossed his phone on the bed and grabbed his suitcase. He’d done as he promised. He’d given Madi a shoulder to cry on and had even said a few words at the funeral. But now it was time to go home and somehow find a way to shake off the heavy feeling that hung over him.
A light tap sounded at the door.
“Come in.”
The door opened. Madi took a few tentative steps inside, her long, curly strawberry blonde hair framing her face. Not many girls could pull off red, puffy eyes and still make it look attractive, especially with that hair color, but right now she looked vulnerable and beautiful. Luke wished he knew how to comfort her, but nothing he could say or do would make it all right. That was the crappy thing about loss.
“Packing?” she said.
Luke tossed a few shirts in his suitcase. “I’m booked on a flight tonight. I need to get back.”
She nodded and took another step forward, resting her hand on the bedpost. “You’re sure I can’t convince you to stay? Dad always wanted you to take over his practice, and we could really use your help.”
The words tugged on Luke’s conscience, making him feel even heavier. Ever since he’d arrived, Madi had been hinting about him staying around for a while—at least until they could find someone else to take over the practice. But Luke had to say no. He hated doing it, but staying here would only create more problems. Madi obviously wasn’t over him yet, and the last thing Luke wanted to do was give her false hope, which was exactly what he would be doing if he agreed to stay. Besides, he had his own problems and practice to worry about.
“I’m sorry, but I can’t,” Luke said. “I have a life back in Shelter now, and it’s time for me to get back to it.”
Madi studied him with a solemn expression as her fingers tapped against the bedpost. “Does she deserve you?”
Luke’s eyes shot to hers. This wasn’t exactly the conversation he wanted to have with his ex-fiancée, especially not after everything she’d been through. “What?”
“That bachelorette girl.”
Madi knew about that?
She shrugged and tried for a smile. “I saw the way you looked at her. And if that didn’t convince me, those pictures of you two kissing did.” Her head cocked to the side. “So, I’ll ask it again. Does she deserve you?”
Luke had no idea how to answer the question. What made one person deserve another, anyway? “She deserves to be happy,” he said. “Just like you do.”
“And you.”
Luke chuckled, more at the absurdity of the conversation than actual humor. “Yeah, well, a lot of people do I guess.” He gave her a wary look, thinking of her father. “But that doesn’t mean we always get to be happy, does it?”
A knowing sadness reflected in her eyes. “Right.” She took a step back, and her fingers clasped together. “Well, I’ll let you get back to packing. Let me know when you’re ready, and I’ll give you a ride.”
“Thanks.”
She turned and walked to the door, her hand resting on the doorknob as she looked back at him. “I hope you find happiness, Luke. Wherever that is.” Then she opened the door and left.
Luke tossed a pair of shoes in his bag, and then sat down on the bed. Happiness. His parents had always taught him that he was responsible for his own happiness and to never put that burden on someone else’s shoulders. It was good advice, and for the most part, Luke had tried to do that. But now that Taycee had come back into his life, she’d somehow taken that happiness and made it bigger and better than ever before. She’d given him a taste of bliss. Misery, too. But mostly bliss.
It wasn’t something he wanted to give up.
Luke stood and shoved the rest of his stuff in the bag, his movements more purposeful. Then he slung it over his shoulder and walked out the door, shutting it and the reminder of his old life firmly behind him.
Taycee’s sparkly brown eye shadow fell to the floor with a clack, dusting her ceramic tiled bathroom floor with the fine powder. She frowned and kicked the container, creating an even bigger mess. Whatever. Better on the floor than highlighting her puffy, sleep-deprived eyes—something she blamed on Luke and his refusal to call her back. Where was he anyway?
In twenty minutes, Taycee
was supposed to be at The Barn for her final interview. It was a day for celebration, yet her feet still dragged. Jake had been right about giving the viewers more credit. Ever since the interview with Michael Roik aired, the site’s traffic increased. Jessa had added Luke’s name to the final poll, and more people voted during the last round than any of the others. Why that was, Taycee had no idea, especially when the winner turned out to be Jake. Did it mean that people still hoped that Jake was still in the running? Hopefully not, because if they expected Taycee to proclaim her love for Jake, they’d be disappointed—not a reaction she wanted to deal with again.
Which was exactly why she took her time getting ready. Her cell phone rang at 6:30 on the nose, but she ignored it as she put a couple of eye drops in each eye, hoping it would help get the red out. Then she grabbed her purse and walked to The Barn. She needed fresh air to breathe and time to think.
“Hey,” Jessa said when she walked through the door. “Where have you been? I was getting worried.”
“Sorry I’m late,” said Taycee. “I needed some time to think before I do this.”
Jessa studied Taycee from under the rim of a black Colby cap. “You know you have nothing to worry about, right? Miles and Jake stood by your side when you needed it most. While I’m sure the viewers would love for you to say you’re falling for Jake rather than Luke, even if you don’t, it’s going to be fine.”
“Is it?” Taycee was thinking more about Luke than the show when she asked the question.
Jessa shrugged. “Think about it this way: The majority of our viewers are female, right? Since most of them are probably half in love with Jake anyway, they’ll be more than happy to find out he’s still available. So you’re really doing them all a favor by choosing Luke instead.”
Taycee tried for a smile, but it didn’t quite feel real. Yes, she chose Luke. Hands down, she chose Luke. But what if he didn’t choose her back? What if she blew her one and only chance with him?
Jessa grabbed Taycee’s elbow and pulled her toward the couch. “I’m willing to bet that someday we’ll look back on this and have ourselves a good laugh, especially when we tell our kids and grandkids about it.”
“That would require you finding a guy first,” Taycee said. “Settling down and all that.”
“I can settle down.”
Taycee laughed. “Just don’t try to be too efficient when you start looking. Learn from my mistake—and yours—and take it one guy at a time.”
That earned her a grin from Jessa. “See? We’re already cracking jokes.”
A deep breath in and Taycee took a seat next to a table holding a vase of beautiful white chrysanthemums—a flower arrangement she’d made herself. In the US, chrysanthemums were known as the positive and cheerful flower. In some countries of Europe and Asia, they were symbolic of death or grief. In others, they represented honesty. For Taycee, the bouquet typified her journey these past several weeks and now served as a reminder: To be strong. Honest. Real.
With any luck, maybe Luke would even watch. It would finally give her the chance to explain.
“And we’re on in three . . . two . . . one . . .” Burt pointed at them.
Jessa opened her mouth to ask the first question, but Taycee held up a hand. She faced the camera and lifted her chin. “This past week, I have been accused of several things: Dishonesty, deception, manipulation, leading people on, etc.” She paused. “In a way, you were right because I was never completely honest with you. But that’s going to change right now.”
Taycee’s fingers played in her lap, clasping, unclasping. Clasping, unclasping. “For me, this show has always been about Shelter Springs, rather than the people it was supposed to be about: me and the bachelors. If I could rewind the past several weeks and do things differently, I would. I would treat the show, you viewers, and the bachelors with the respect that you deserve.”
A cream linen envelope lay next to the bouquet on the table by Taycee. She picked it up and ran her finger along the crisp edge. “Many of you have voted for your favorite bachelor tonight, and the winner’s name is in this envelope. Throughout this entire contest, you guys have chosen well for me because Jake and Miles are two of the best men I have ever known.” Taycee paused. “But so is someone else—someone who you voted off a couple of weeks ago because of something I orchestrated. The truth is, Luke Carney is not a player. Far from it, actually. He’s the best kind of person there is.
“I’ve read some of the less-than-flattering comments people have posted about Luke, and I want you all to know that you couldn’t be more wrong about him. I was the one who asked Missy to make him look bad so you’d vote him off. Like so many of my other choices these past several weeks, I let fear drive that decision. I had feelings for Luke and never imagined that he could ever return them, so I wanted him off. In so doing, I kept all of you from getting to know what an amazing person he is. Luke is kind, good, smart, funny, and truly exceptional. Had I stayed out of it and let you get to know him, I’m certain you would have chosen him for me in the end, because there really is no one else for me.”
Taycee’s hands clamped down over the top of the envelope, trapping it under her fingers. “It doesn’t really matter whose name is in this envelope, because tonight I’m doing something I should have done all along. I’m making my own choice—a choice that will always be Luke Carney.”
The silence that followed landed like a heavy weight on Taycee’s shoulders. Not even Jessa spoke. Taycee had said what she’d come to say, but it still felt so unfinished, as if she hadn’t said enough, apologized enough, defended Luke enough, or set things right enough.
But maybe that was the point. No matter how hard a person tried to make things right, sometimes it never was enough. That’s what forgiveness was for.
With slow movements, Taycee gave the envelope one last pat. Then she stood and walked out the door, back into the night.
IT WAS LATE BY THE TIME TAYCEE made it back to her house. She had no idea how long she walked, only that her feet ached and she still didn’t feel any better. Only tired. Which was good, she supposed. Maybe she could at least get some sleep tonight.
“Hey,” a voice said, making Taycee jump. Jessa sat under the cover of darkness on the top porch step. Her hand patted the empty concrete next to her.
“Hey yourself.” Taycee plopped down and rested her head on Jessa’s shoulder.
“You did good tonight,” said Jessa. “But you weren’t completely honest with everyone.”
Taycee frowned and lifted her head. “What do you mean?”
“You took all the blame for what happened, when it was mostly my fault. I was the one who coerced you into doing the show, I was the one who told you to up the romance factor, and I was the one who told you to bury your relationship with Luke to finish it.”
Taycee’s lips lifted into a small smile. That admission was big for Jessa. “I could have told you no.”
“I know. But you didn’t because you’re a better person than me.” Jessa’s sandal tapped against the concrete step.
Taycee yawned, unable to fight the exhaustion anymore. “I wasn’t right for the job, Jess. You can see that now, right?”
“No,” Jessa said. “You were perfect for the job. If Luke had won instead of Jake, everything would have ended as it should.”
The warm humid night air seemed to mix with Jessa’s words and seep into Taycee, easing some of the ache she’d lived with for the past several days. Although things were far from great, it helped that Jessa was still here. Still her friend. “Or,” Taycee said. “If you’d been the bachelorette instead, things might have ended as it should, too.”
Silence. And then, “What?”
Taycee suppressed a laugh. It wasn’t often she surprised Jessa, and she loved it when she did. “I’m saying that maybe you and Jake would be a good fit, that’s all. You do think he’s handsome, rich, and charming.”
“I think that about a lot of guys.”
Taycee’s eye
brows rose.
“Well, okay,” Jessa said. “So maybe there aren’t a lot that fit into that category around here. But that doesn’t mean I’m going to fall for just anyone—least of all one of the bachelors on your dating show. I’m not that idiotic.”
“You keep telling yourself that if it makes you feel better.”
“I will,” said Jessa. “Despite everything, though, things still worked out. We raised enough money, and assuming everything goes smoothly, the farmers market will be open in two weeks. And, if they’re able to sell enough to pay off their loans, the majority of them plan to sign up with Jake’s company in the fall.”
“Glad to hear it.” Taycee smiled, nudging Jessa’s shoulder with her own. “Hey, mind if I ask you a question?”
“Shoot.”
“Why are you still in Shelter Springs instead of out in the real world, making your splash? Because it would be huge. And beautiful. Like one of those cool fountain shows.” Please don’t say it’s because of me.
“I think you overestimate me.” Jessa’s sandal tapped against the concrete again, faster this time. “Honestly? I guess it’s because I lack the courage.”
“Please. You’re the most daring person I know.”
“It’s all an act.” Jessa’s hands clasped her knees as she leaned back and examined the sky. She rarely allowed her vulnerability to show, but now, right here, on this warm, clear night it was there in her big blue eyes.
What’s more, it looked good on her.
“Maybe you should ask Jake if his company has any openings,” Taycee said. It hurt to say the words, to make the suggestion that a life outside of Shelter Springs might be a better fit for her friend. She didn’t want to see Jessa go, just like she hadn’t wanted to see anyone else go. But go they did, and now they were better for it. Maybe Jessa would be better too.
The Reluctant Bachelorette Page 25