“Don’t get too excited,” I tell her, downplaying her expectations. “You know how these things end up. One day I’m telling you this, and in a few days you’ll probably get a message from me saying, ‘Actually, never mind.’ ”
“Just let me be excited right now,” she commands, glancing around my office. “This is the hottest news I’ve heard in a long time. I thought after your asshole ex I’d never get a message from you like that again. And say what you like, but if you want to debrief the situation, that means it’s important to you, or it’s playing on your mind.”
“Or it’s because you know him!” I tell her, covering my face with my hands. “You know I have issues letting people in.”
“Understatement,” she sighs, bringing her eyes to mine. “Not everyone is going to fuck you over, Celina. Sometimes you just have to take a chance, and trust me, Knuckles is a man worth taking a chance on. He’s sweet, funny, a good father, but will also make sure no one ever fucks with you. He’s the protector of the MC, Celina. Yeah, they call it some other shit, but that’s how I see it. He’s a biker who cares and knows what he wants. And that happens to be you.” She takes a deep breath. “Now, when are you going to move into the clubhouse? I could use some female company, and I’m there all the time now that I’m on break from college.”
I chase her away from my desk.
After going out to interview a local artist for another piece I’m currently working on, I head back to the office to pack up. I told Akeira I’d call her on my way over. We never got to meet up as we’d previously planned, and with both of us working full-time and her recently married and sorting out her new house, we haven’t had much solid catching-up time. Handbag clutched to my chest and heels clicking on the pavement, I leave my office and head toward my car. I come to a standstill when I see Knuckles standing by my car, a bouquet of flowers in his hand.
“Are you free to go on an adventure right now?” he asks, eyes sparkling.
“Right now?”
He hands me the sunflowers. “Yeah, I thought we could go for a ride.”
I’d worn black tailored pants to work this morning, which he saw me in.
“I’ll drop you back off to your car afterward,” he says, nodding toward his sexy bike. “You’ve never been on one before, right?”
I shake my head.
“Perfect,” he replies, a satisfied glint in his eyes. “I guess I’ll be your first.”
I smell the flowers, closing my eyes and breathing in their beautiful scent. “Thank you for the flowers. What are they for?”
“Just because,” he replies, reaching out to pull me closer to him with a hand on my hip.
“I’m meant to go to my friend’s house right now,” I say, stepping into his body.
“I’ll take you there,” he says, moving the flowers out of the way so he can kiss me. “Come on, it will be fun.”
I imagine Akeira’s face at my showing up at her house on the back of a motorcycle, pressed against the sexiest man I’ve ever seen. “Okay.”
I put my flowers in my passenger seat, lock my car, and then walk over to his bike. He helps me put on a helmet, which is more claustrophobic than I thought it would be, but I soon adjust to it.
“Keep your foot off the exhaust, hold on to me, and move with me when I turn.”
“Anything else?” I ask him, cocking my hip.
“Yeah, enjoy the ride,” he replies, grinning at me before putting on his own helmet. He climbs on, and then I do the same, adrenaline filling me. My fingers run down his abs before holding on to him, and I glance down to make sure that my feet are where they’re meant to be. He starts the loud engine, and I grip on to him tighter as he takes off down the road. I can’t help but smile as we start to gain speed, the feeling of flying and freedom taking over me. Now I know what Erin was raving on about, it’s like everything else in the world is forgotten, all my problems and worries, and for the first time in what feels like forever I’m living in the present, the now.
I feel alive.
He takes me for a scenic ride around the beautiful parks and buildings of the city before we come to a stop near a lake.
I get off the bike, and he does the same, removing his helmet and offering me his hand. Walking down to the lake, I can’t help but say, “This is a little romantic.”
I don’t usually like public displays of affection, but no one is around and it feels really private. The sun is setting, and it’s just a stunning view.
He chuckles and replies, “Actually, I had to stop somewhere because you never told me where your friend lives.”
I look up at him and start to laugh. “You could have pretended, you know, and taken the credit for this,” I say as I gesture to the view.
“No bullshit, remember?” he says, giving my hand a squeeze. “But I did bring you flowers, so that counts as something.”
“I never said it didn’t,” I reply with a sassy look. “I love the flowers. I loved that bike ride even more.”
“I knew you would,” he says, glancing up at the sky and then back to me. “It kind of sets free that little wild side everyone has. Some more than others.”
I smile but say nothing. My wild and reckless side retired a few years back, and instead I put my focus into my career and reaching all my goals. But that feeling of being free, I can see how people can get addicted to that.
“We’d better get going so you can see your friend,” he murmurs, bringing my fingers to his lips and kissing them. He tries to bring me closer to his body, but I resist, and something about that makes him chuckle.
“What?” I ask him.
“You’re not very affectionate, are you?” he asks, bringing me flush up against his body. “It’s like your default setting is to not like being touched very much. I don’t even think you realize you do it, but you’re always putting space between us every time I touch you, or you wait for a little but eventually move away.”
I shift on my feet.
Why is he always putting me on the spot like this?
“I’m an Aquarius,” I reply, and he shakes his head at me, lip twitching. I puff out a deep breath. “I don’t know, and you’re right I don’t do it consciously. I just don’t like someone always being in my space, but I am affectionate sometimes. I like to cuddle.”
After sex, mainly, when my guard is down and I’m sleepy and sated.
Shit, is there something wrong with me? Maybe I wasn’t hugged enough as a child.
“I didn’t mean all the time,” he murmurs, lowering his head to give me a quick kiss. “But sometimes I literally have to pin you in place to get a kiss from you.”
“You’ve known me for five minutes,” I point out.
“Time doesn’t mean shit,” he says, eyes dropping to my lips. “You could know someone for a year, and someone for a week, and be closer to the person you just met.”
“I agree with that,” I say, resting my open palm on his chest. “I guess I’d better introduce you to my best friend.”
“After only knowing me for five minutes? Why do you want to rush into this, Celina?” he asks, giving me shit about my previous comment.
“Time doesn’t mean shit,” I fire back, slowly smiling. “Now, you going to take me for another ride or what?”
“I’ll give you a ride anytime, sweetheart,” he rumbles, leading me back to the bike, his arm wrapped around my shoulders. “This time, remember to tell me where we’re going though.”
“She’s ten minutes from my house, but further up,” I tell him. “We need some secret code so I can show you where to go.”
“Like pointing or tapping my shoulder in which direction you want me to turn?” he asks, amusement in his tone. “Just tell me the street name and number, and I’ll figure it out, no Morse code is needed.”
I roll my eyes. “Fine. It’s Twenty-eight Beach Lane. Two-story house on the right.”
“Got it,” he murmurs, and when I step out of his reach he gives me a knowing look, but doesn
’t say anything else.
I duck my head, staring down at the road.
He said I’m not very affectionate, and that’s a sore spot for me, because it’s something Robert would say. When Knuckles said it though, it was curious, not bitter or hateful. Then again, we just met, everything is fresh and new; we don’t know each other’s true colors yet. What he accepts now he might hate later.
I’ll try to be more affectionate, but it would also be nice to find someone who gets me. Who understands that just because I’m not all touchy-feely, bubbly and cuddly all the time, I’m not a cold person.
Because trust me, I know that in the right hands, all this frost will melt, and there’s fire underneath.
A raging, burning inferno.
I’m not cold.
I’m terrified of rejection, of hurt, of wasting my time and of losing myself.
But how can I expect love if I’m afraid to give it?
All I want is a man with eyes for only me, and one who won’t run when things get a little tough.
Take your money, your status, and your fancy things, I just want acceptance.
And it’s harder to find than you think.
14
I knock on Akeira’s door, but there’s no answer.
“She told you to come over and she’s not home?” Knuckles asked, knocking a few more times.
“I was supposed to call her on my way over, but I couldn’t necessarily do that on the back of your bike.” I look to her driveway. “Her car’s here. Knowing her . . .” I test the doorknob, and yeah it’s unlocked. “She does this sometimes.”
I walk inside with Knuckles moving from my back to my side.
“Akeira!” I call out. “Where are you?”
“Be down in a second!” she calls from upstairs. “Sorry, tonight is date night with Ben and I forgot to shave so I thought I’d rush in and do it before you got here, but now only one side of my vag is bare and the other side looks like I’m part werewolf.”
I wince and share a look with Knuckles, who looks on the verge of bursting into laughter.
“That’s nice, Akeira, but I’m kind of not alone here,” I call back up to her.
Silence, and then, “Fuck me dead. Who did you bring? You have no other friends.”
Knuckles clearly can’t contain himself any longer, and throws his head back and laughs loudly.
“You brought a man here and didn’t give me warning?” she calls out, sounding like she wants to kill me. “You remember what I opened the door in the last time you came over, right?”
“I don’t think I’ll ever forget that, babe,” I reply in a dry tone. She opened the door in some new bondage gear she’d bought and wanted to try on before wearing it for her husband. Except she’d put it on wrong, had gotten stuck, then answered the door with rope wrapped around her body, nipples out.
“A little help?” she’d said.
Shit.
She’s right, I should have warned her. “Just trying to keep things fresh and spontaneous between us, Akeira.”
I hear her gasp. If there’s one word to describe my best friend, I’d use dramatic. “Are you saying our relationship is getting boring? Here I am, leg on the bathtub, door open, shaving while having a conversation with you from the bottom of the staircase. How is that not wild?”
I look to Knuckles. “Is this what you meant when you said everyone has a wild side?”
“No,” he manages to reply with a straight face. “I’m afraid not.”
“Be down in a sec! Make yourself at home.”
“Want a drink or something?” I ask him, nodding toward the kitchen. “She usually has lemonade in her fridge.” And plenty of alcohol, although with the whole bike thing, that’s out, even for me.
“Sounds good,” he replies, taking in her spacious, brand-new home.
“Beautiful, isn’t it? They just bought it about two months ago,” I say, raiding her fridge and taking out a jug of freshly made pink lemonade and some strawberries.
“How do you two know each other?” he asks, studying me.
“We went to school together. I’ve known her for years; she’s basically family. I was the maid of honor at her wedding.”
Since neither of us has a sibling, Akeira and I have spent a lot of time together, and we always have the best time with each other. She’s been there through every milestone in my life, and vice versa. She knows me, she gets me, and sometimes we don’t even have to speak out loud to have a conversation.
I pour the drinks and slice up some strawberries to eat on the side.
“Aren’t we fancy,” I tease, picking up a piece of fruit and popping it into my mouth. “Are we doing anything after this, or do you have to be somewhere?”
“We have to be somewhere,” he murmurs, licking his lips and giving me a once-over. “I’m taking you back to my clubhouse, and I’m going to make you scream my name again. That was so fuckin’ hot, Celina. I loved hearing my name roll off your tongue as you were coming.”
“Well, that escalated,” I deadpan, feeling heat appear on my cheeks. “No damn filter.”
He takes a sip of the lemonade, puts the glass down, then pulls me onto his lap, fingers grabbing my ass. “Can’t decide if I like the pants or the skirt more.”
“You’re allowed to like both.”
He cups my face and smiles. “You’re loud when you come.”
My eyes widen. “Can you not?”
“Sorry, guys,” Akeira says as she wanders in, stopping when she sees Knuckles and me, his hand still possessively on my face. “Well, well, what do we have here? Is this the biker you messaged me about?”
She smiles widely, her pouty lips covered in gloss. “I’m Akeira.”
Knuckles lets go of me to give her his hand. “Knuckles, nice to meet you, Akeira. You have a beautiful home.”
“Thank you. Knuckles, that’s an interesting name,” she says, tucking her long, black, silky hair behind her ear. My best friend was born in Japan, but moved here when she was one. She’s as beautiful as she is kindhearted, and more than anything she loves a good laugh. She lets go of his hand and gives me a big, warm hug. “I’ve missed you.”
“Missed you too.”
“He’s handsome.”
“I know.”
“Is he the one who can cook?” she asks, turning back to Knuckles. “A sexy man like you knows his way around the kitchen, and the bedroom I’m assuming, or you probably wouldn’t have somehow gotten an invitation to my house.”
Why did I come here again?
Maybe I wanted to test him, I don’t know.
If Akeira likes him, it would mean a lot to me, because she tends to get to the bottom of things real quick. She’s prying to see if she approves or not. She didn’t with Robert, which proves she’s much more intuitive than I am.
“I’m an all-rounder,” he replies, lips kicking up at the corners. “And it wasn’t planned that I’m here, I kind of bullied Celina into it.”
“No one can bully Celina,” she responds, sending me an amused look. “She’s as stubborn as she is beautiful.”
“Truer words have never been spoken.”
“Hey,” I say, frowning. “I’ve been nothing but accommodating, so the two of you can back off. You’re not meant to gang up on me.”
“It was a compliment,” she points out, sharing a look with Knuckles like they’re longtime friends.
“Yeah, a backhanded one,” I say, crossing my arms, but a grin plays on my lips. “So tonight is date night, huh?”
“Yeah, same day every week, because once you get married spontaneity gets thrown out the door,” she complains, but her gentle eyes and soft smile give away how much she loves being married.
“Another reason why I’ve never been married.”
Of course Knuckles has to add in his two cents on that one.
“Really? I thought it was because no one would marry you,” I quip, smiling at my own quickness.
I’m returned a cocky smirk. �
��I could get any woman I wanted to marry me, sweetheart, and I think we both know that.”
Akeira’s eyebrows reach her hairline. “I’m glad you’re confident. Celina likes to pounce on any show of weakness.”
I throw my hands up in the air. “This is the last time I’m bringing a man here.”
“Damn straight it is,” Knuckles inserts, lips tightening.
Akeira fans herself, and I narrow my eyes at her. She stops the fanning, her hands landing on her hips. “I’m sorry, Celina, but I’m still a woman.”
More laughter.
“Do you guys want to go outside and sit on the deck? I’ll bring some snacks,” my best friend asks. We head outside, and she soon returns with a cheese platter she’s made up on the spot, her Bluetooth speaker, and a bottle of wine. “Lick” by Cardi B starts to play on full blast, and I wince until she lowers the volume.
“So,” she murmurs, leaning forward and glancing between us. “Tell me everything I’ve missed. How did the badass biker catch the eye of this sexy, emotionally unavailable journalist?”
I pull the bottle of wine closer.
Knuckles gets called back to the clubhouse. I don’t know what for, but I hope that everything is okay.
“He’s fucking hot,” Akeira says to me. “You’ve done well, my girl. I’m so proud of you.”
I smile from behind my glass, amused at her antics. I swallow my mouthful and admit, “There’s something about him.”
“I don’t think I’ve ever seen you like this before. Look at you, you’re blushing,” she says, eyes bright. “Finally, my bestie has found a man worthy of her.”
“We don’t know that just yet,” I remind her. “It’s still early days. There’s also something I want to talk to you about.” I put down my glass. “I’ve been writing notes for a story on the MC, basically just showing them in a different light. No secrets, nothing shady or anything like that, just about how they’re a close-knit family and are all bonded by their love for riding.”
Her lips tighten. “Are you sure that’s a good idea? I mean, I could see readers eating that up, and I’m sure your boss would love it, but that’s kind of mixing business with pleasure, and it could backfire, don’t you think? What did Knuckles say about it?”
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