“Dat hates that tree, but Mamm loves it. He’s had to prune its branches many times right next to the barn.” Gabe chuckled. “One of the rare things I’ve ever heard them argue about.”
Honor hadn’t heard her folks argue much. In fact, maybe not ever. Not that they always agreed, but they never argued about it. Her mother always acquiesced. Always. Honor blew out her breath. She wasn’t like her mother. She had no idea whether she was capable of always giving in to a husband. She doubted it, and the thought made her even more upset.
“You think we’ll argue?” Gabe asked with a twinkle in his eye.
She couldn’t help but laugh. “Probably.”
He seemed surprised at her answer, but he chuckled along with her.
“I should be getting back,” she said.
“All right.” He walked to the door and waited for her. “I hope you’ll be real happy here, Honor.”
“Thank you.” She felt like she needed to touch him, needed to do something tender and loving since he was being so kind. She stood on tiptoe and kissed his cheek. He audibly sucked in his breath and when he gazed at her, his eyes were intense, probing.
“Honor,” he whispered.
He reached out and drew her to his chest. She heard his heart beating wildly against her ear. His arms tightened and she forced herself to remain in his embrace. Maybe if she stopped resisting him, she would feel better. She relaxed her stance, leaning into him. He seemed instantly aware of the change for he lowered his head and kissed the top of her kapp.
“You make me so happy,” he murmured. “Only one more week.”
She closed her eyes. One more week. One more week. One more week.
Chapter Five
Willa sat on Honor’s bed with a poorly-concealed look of concern on her face. Honor knew full well that she was being scrutinized, and she didn’t like it. But this was Willa, and Willa knew the whole story.
“How are you doing?” Willa asked. “It’s not long now.”
“Mamm has been great. Everything’s getting done even with all the packing going on.”
“Well, you can’t pack up too much in the front room or kitchen yet. You need it all for the wedding.”
“I know. Mamm keeps reminding Dat.”
“It’ll be a beautiful wedding, Honor. And your dress is so pretty. I love the shade of blue.”
“Jah. It’s pretty.” Honor looked away, pretending to focus on the dress hanging beside the door. But her thoughts were scattered, thinking of everything that still had to be organized.
“And Gabe? I bet he’s excited.”
“He is.”
“Honor? How are you really?” Willa asked, finally giving voice to her worry. Honor sighed, but she could hardly put her off.
“I’m doing all right. Better than I thought. Gabe and I, well, we’re getting to know each other better.”
“That’s gut.”
Honor shrugged. “I guess. He made me a grandfather clock.”
Willa’s brow shot up. “Did he? That’s wonderful.”
“It is. It’s lovely. You’ll have to come over and see it once we move to the daadi haus.”
“I will. I’ll come over right away.” Willa reached out and took Honor’s hand. “I’m so glad you’re not moving away. I know things didn’t work out the way you planned, but still, I’m glad you’re here.”
Honor shook her head. “Nee, things didn’t work out at all like I planned.”
“And your dat won’t change his mind?”
“He’s set on moving. Mamm is even acting happy about it.”
“Is she? That’s a surprise.”
“For me, too.” Honor extracted her hand from Willa’s and fiddled with the quilt they were sitting on, tracing the stitching around the quilt pieces with her finger. “I-I wouldn’t have done it, if I’d known.”
“It’s not too late,” Willa said, her voice low and subdued. “You don’t have to go through with it. You don’t.”
Honor’s eyes filled with tears. “I do, Willa. It’s gone too far now.”
Willa grabbed her arm. “Nee. It’s not too late. You can back out. We’ll come up with some kind of excuse.”
Honor shook her head. “I can’t back out. Gabe is counting on it. Counting on me. He wants to marry me, Willa. In the worst way.”
“Of course, he wants to marry you. I understand. But still, if your heart’s not in it… Honor, you don’t have to do this.”
Honor wriggled from her grasp and stood. “Jah, I do. And I am going to do it. So please, no more talk, all right?”
Willa’s eyes misted over, but she didn’t say another word. Honor sat back down beside her. “Thank you, Willa. Truly. But it’s going to be all right.”
Willa sniffed and wiped her eyes. She put on a smile. “Of course, it is. Everything is going to be fine.”
“Now, tell me about Collin,” Honor said, eager to get the focus off her courtship.
Willa’s eyes went dreamy. “It’s like he promised, Honor. Everything really is working out just as he said. Since he came back, he’s closer than ever with Ivy and Joseph. They’ve completely forgiven him for being an imposter.”
Honor watched her cousin. Watched the expression of love on her face. She pressed down the rush of jealousy that surged through her.
“According to Ivy, he’s truly their grandson now. We plan to live with them—after our wedding.”
Honor’s brow rose. “So, it’s really gone as far as that?”
Willa nodded.
“I’m glad for you.” She ignored the hitch in her voice.
“So by fall, we’ll both be married ladies,” Willa said, smiling.
“Jah. Am I going to be one of your newehockers? Like you are for me?”
Willa touched her arm. “Of course. Who else would be my attendant but you?”
Honor let out her breath. “I need you to try on your dress. Mamm and I finished it up today.”
“Oh! I can’t wait. Can I try it on now?”
“I don’t see why not,” Honor said, getting up. “Let’s go down to the sewing room. It’s a bit of a mess, but come on. Let’s go.”
They jumped off the bed and left the room, arm in arm.
Chapter Six
On his wedding day, Gabe was up well before four o’clock. He rushed about his room, ensuring that his suit was laid out on his bed. He patted the black fabric, smiling. By the end of the day, Honor would be his. He was glad of it. She’d been so nervous of late—jumpy. She would probably feel better once the day was underway.
But it wasn’t like her. She was one of the most self-assured people he knew. She usually acted as if she doubted nothing. Her confidence and spunky spirit were what had drawn him to her in the first place. Truth be told, he’d been drawn to her for years before she paid him any mind. He used to watch her, especially at Youth Singings. She would always be laughing before they started, flitting about from group to group in the barn, making everyone else smile and laugh, too.
She never knew he watched her. He’d often stand to the side, where he could stare at her without anyone noticing. Except that time when Benjamin Miller did notice.
“She’s beautiful, ain’t so?” he’d asked, sidling up to Gabe.
Gabe had given a start, surprised by Benjamin’s frank comment.
“I s’pose,” he’d answered.
Benjamin had laughed at that. “Man, if you could see your face. You’re gawking at her with goon eyes.” He’d sighed. “Not that I blame you. It’s hard not to stare at her.”
Gabe had been annoyed then. He wasn’t keen on someone shoving their way into his thoughts. Nor was he keen on hearing someone else go on and on about Honor. He wanted her. He wanted her for himself, even though he knew it was a hopeless cause. Still, Benjamin and his comments grated.
But now, wonder of wonders, Honor was going to marry him. That day. Gabe could hardly believe his good fortune. He laid his bow tie—something he’d never worn before and would likely
never wear again—on top of his crisply ironed white shirt. His mother had outdone herself making his suit. It looked store-bought for sure.
But he had no time for all that now. He needed to get out to milk the cows. He planned to be over at the Kennel’s farm well before six o-clock. He’d eat breakfast there and welcome his forgehers. The ushers always came early to greet the people who would start arriving by seven o’clock. It would be a whirlwind from that moment on, and he could hardly contain his excitement.
He wondered how Honor was feeling. Was she even more excited than he was? He’d heard that girls could be absolutely giddy on their wedding days. He grinned. He’d love to see Honor that very second. He wanted to look into her eyes, wanted to feel her eagerness, to see her affection.
He would have thought that a girl like Honor would glow with emotion. But instead, all he’d seen lately was nervousness. Sometimes, he even thought he saw glimpses of dread. Was that normal for a bride? Or was it just nerves? He kept telling himself it was. But if he were brutally honest—if he allowed himself to dwell on it at all—he wasn’t so sure.
He shuddered. Now who was showing nervousness? He was being ridiculous. Everything was going to be fine. They just had to get through the day.
He decided he was going to enjoy it. He blew out the lantern and headed downstairs.
* * *
Honor sat on the edge of her bed. Today. Her wedding was today. She pressed her hand on her heart and felt its frantic beating. In a few hours, she wouldn’t live in this house anymore. She’d live in the Chupps’ daadi haus. With Gabe.
Gabriel Chupp. Her husband.
She drew in a long breath. She sent up a quick prayer for everything to go smoothly. Not that she prayed with any length anymore. Her prayers had gotten shorter and shorter as the wedding neared. Why was that? She didn’t want to consider the reasons.
She got up and walked to her dresser. She picked up the hand mirror and looked at herself. She knew she was pretty. She had pleasant features, and her hair, even when tucked under a kapp, was shiny and soft-looking. She put on a smile, noting her even white teeth. She’d always known she was pretty—not in a vain way, but more in a matter-of-fact way.
But that morning, looking at herself, something was missing. There was no gleam in her eyes, there was only a look of resignation. She put the mirror down. No reason to be looking at herself so early, anyway. She glanced at the black prayer covering she would wear during the ceremony. She didn’t like wearing black—didn’t it represent death and mourning?
Perhaps it was fitting after all.
She cringed. She needed to get ahold of herself.
“Honor?” Her door cracked opened, and Willa peeked inside.
“Hello, Willa. You’re here.”
“This is it,” Willa chirped, coming in. “The day has finally come. I’m here to help in any way that I can.” She laid her newehocker dress on the mussed bed. “I’ll change into this later. What needs to be done?”
Honor shrugged. “Not sure. We’ll ask Mamm. I’m glad you’re here.”
“Where else would I be? Did you sleep last night?”
Honor hadn’t, but she didn’t feel like divulging that. “Well enough. I can’t believe it’s time,” she said, forcing levity in her tone. “Today is my wedding day. Can you believe it?”
Willa smiled and then her expression turned serious. “And you’re fine?”
“More than fine,” Honor forced herself to say. “Gabe is a wonderful man. We’re going to have a wonderful life.”
Willa gave her a quick hug. “I’m so relieved to hear you say that. I’ve been worried.”
Honor nodded. “I know you have.”
“I want you to be happy.”
“I know.”
Willa smiled. “But it looks like things are going to work out, after all. Gabe is a lucky man, Honor.”
Honor gave another forced smile. No, Gabe wasn’t a lucky man, but she’d have to change that. And she would. She would make sure their marriage was a good one.
“Shall we go downstairs and ask your mamm what we need to do?”
“Jah.” Honor gazed around her bedroom. “It’s odd. I won’t sleep here anymore.”
“Nee.”
“And soon, this house will be torn down and condominiums will be built in its place.”
Willa paused at the doorway. “That’s really strange to think about.”
Honor squared her shoulders. “So, let’s not think about it. This is my wedding day.”
“That it is!” Willa agreed with a laugh.
And they went downstairs.
* * *
The animals had been seen to. All the wedding attendants and the ushers were there. Breakfast had been eaten together, and now it was nearly seven o’clock in the morning. Everyone had changed into their wedding clothes and was poised to greet the wedding guests. Honor had slipped upstairs to put on her dress. She wanted a moment alone, anyway.
Soon, about two hundred people would be squished into the house for the ceremony. Soon, she would be a married woman. She changed into her beautiful blue wedding dress. Her mother had taken great care in making it—it should last a lifetime. Honor would wear it to church services over the coming years and when her time came, she’d likely be buried in it.
She took down her hair again and brushed it till it began to float upward with static electricity. She laughed and wound it into a bun at the nape of her neck. Then she picked up the black head covering and placed it securely over her hair. She pinned a few bobby pins in it, although she was quite sure she didn’t need them. And then she picked up the mirror.
She practiced smiling, practiced putting energy and love into her expression. People would be watching her that day—it was only natural. And she wanted everyone to think she was madly in love and delighted to become Mrs. Gabriel Chupp. She’d taken special care with brushing her teeth and washing her face. She now pinched her cheeks, seeing a healthy flush cover her face. She’d secretly pinch them now and again during the three-hour service.
Of course, she and Gabe wouldn’t be in the service the entire time. First, they’d be in another room with the preacher while he counseled them on marriage. And then, when they went into the service, they’d sit through a long sermon before the actual wedding promises took place.
Was she up for it? She was used to sitting for long services. Sometimes the second sermon of a regular church service went on for a very long time. Especially if Deacon Elias had anything to do with it. So, a three-hour wedding service shouldn’t be hard to sit through.
She heard buggies and talking outside and went over to her window to look down. There were already five buggies in a tidy row to the side of the barn. Soon, the entire yard would be bulging with buggies. She saw the Yoders walking across the frozen grass toward the front porch.
It was happening. It was really happening. She fastened her white apron over her dress and adjusted her cape. With a sigh, she bent over and put on her high-topped black shoes. She stood, ready.
She glanced around her room one last time. She stared at her suitcase, sitting by the door. That night, she would spend at Gabe’s house, which wasn’t exactly tradition. Usually, the new couple would live the first few months with the bride’s family, but since Honor’s parents were moving, that wasn’t going to work.
Honor swallowed the tears that had begun clogging her throat. She said another quick prayer and went back downstairs.
Chapter Seven
The sermon was a blur. All Gabe could think about was the beautiful young woman sitting next to him. He’d never seen Honor look so stunning. Her wedding dress made her eyes look even bigger and lovelier. He was acutely aware of how close she sat to him. Acutely aware of every breath she took, every little noise she made. She seemed restless, but likely she was eager for the time of the service when they would stand before the preacher and make their promises to one another before God and all the witnesses.
When Preacher B
artholomew finally called them forward, his legs felt numb. He faltered slightly, his face going hot with embarrassment. Honor stood and walked beside him until they stood in front of the preacher.
Preacher Bartholomew spoke of the beauty and sanctity of marriage and then he asked them to respond with their promises to each other to be faithful and true. Honor’s voice trembled when she spoke, and for a panicked moment, Gabe thought she might burst into tears. She didn’t, though, and he sucked in a breath of relief.
“I now call God’s blessing down on this new couple,” the preacher intoned. “May God bless you and keep you and may you be fruitful on this earth.”
Gabe couldn’t stop smiling. He knew his grin had taken over his entire face, but he couldn’t have dimmed it if he tried. He grasped Honor’s clammy hand, holding it in his, giving his warmth to her. They were facing the congregation now, and people were grinning at them with pleasure.
He felt Honor trembling beside him. But it was over now. No need to be nervous anymore. A few men rose to give testimony about marriage, and the preacher closed with a long prayer.
And then, the flurry began. The women bustled toward the kitchen to serve the first meal of the celebration. Gabe squeezed Honor’s hand and amidst the commotion, he looked deeply in her eyes.
“Hello, wife,” he said gently to her.
She blinked up at him. “H-hello, husband.”
And he couldn’t help himself; he leaned down and kissed her tenderly, quickly on her lips. She stiffened, and he smiled again. She had surprised him by being so shy. Surely, she realized that it was all right if he stole a kiss from his new bride. She gave him a tremulous smile and then gently pulled her hand free and left for the kitchen.
* * *
“Ach, Honor, you needn’t be in here helping,” her aenti, Willa’s mother, said.
“Nee. I want to help,” she replied, walking straight to the counter where glasses of punch were being filled.
Honor's Wedding (Hollybrook Amish Romance) Page 3