“But why would our next date be any different than the first?” I questioned
“I was blinded by despair and was raging at the world and how unfair life is.”
“And that’s behind you?”
“No,” he admitted. “But now I’ve found you, I can cope with the other stuff.”
10
Bryce
I held onto him, inhaling his scent, my panther purring. I found my mate, and by some miracle he didn’t hate me. He was still pissed at me, he implied that strongly enough, but he felt it too. He might be a human, but he sensed I was his mate. And we could work with that. How? I wasn’t quite sure. But we would.
We had to.
He was my fated.
“It felt awful.” His words punched me in the gut.
It suddenly clicked that...maybe Corey was working. Was he the manny? Shit, I didn’t know what he did for a living.
“Let’s go outside.” I felt weird doing this even though Brad wasn’t in the room. “We’ll stay close,” I promised, not wanting him to be scared or nervous or I didn’t even know what. Everything was rushing at me all at once and my entire focus was on making Corey comfortable, making him feel safe.
He agreed and we went out back and sat on the chairs that surrounded their fire pit. I wanted to be closer to him...for him to be on my lap, but conversations needed to be had. He was human and my mate and our first meeting had been shitastic at best.
“You’re my mate.” Saying it felt amazing, like I was on top of the world. He was my mate. My fated. My one and only.
“Whoa, hold on there, buddy. Just because I’m hard as a rock and thought it was a good idea to make out with you doesn’t mean everything is right as rain.” He scootched his chair close. Maybe not right as rain, but not a rejection either. “You’re the...the panther.” His eyes widened and he raked me up and down with his eyes. “The confusing parts of the dream with the… yeah… ummm... and then the big… the panther on the news. It’s true.”
I had no idea what the dream was about and we’d get to that, but first we needed to focus on the panther bit.
“Yes, I’m a panther shifter.” He held up his hand to stop me from speaking, his head shaking.
“You don’t need to go into detail. I’ve even seen one shift, and I’ll never get that out of my head.” His nose wrinkled and the urge to kiss it almost had me jumping out of my chair. Maybe we’d get there, but for now, it was best to ignore thoughts like that. No. Not maybe. We would. I just needed to be patient.
“Shifting is gross?” I had a feeling I was missing something, but what came out of his mouth next...
“No—seeing Brad shifting is meh.”
“I’m sure his mate disagrees, but I’m right there with you on that one.” I reached out for his hand; he hesitated then gave it to me and it was suddenly the most precious gift I’d ever been given. “Tell me about this dream thing.”
And he did, though the recollections were hazy, including the parts of him waking up hard and needy. I got that part. I’d been dealing with the erection that wouldn’t be sated myself.
“And then there’s the panther,” he met my eyes, “it’s you but it’s not—the eyes...they aren’t yours, but I feel it...does that make any sense?”
“Want me to show you?” I asked, and he bit his bottom lip and slowly shook his head from side to side.
“I think this is a whole lot to process without you getting naked and turning furry.”
“How about just my eyes?” I offered.
“It’s you. I feel it. I know it.”
“But?”
“But that doesn’t mean I can go and just jump on in. You may be cool with this mate thing, but you were a jerk.”
“I was, and I’m sorry. It’s no excuse, but it was a horrible day and shit hit the fan after I was already at the restaurant.”
“You can’t just take bad days out on people.”
“You’re right. And I apologize. I ignored you and you should never be neglected, even if you weren’t my mate.” I squeezed his hand gently. “But I’m glad you are so, please, tell me how to fix it.”
“Take me on a date and treat me like I’m more important than your cell phone.” He watched my face as he spoke, the hurt in his eyes over that night right there for me to see—to feel—to regret putting there.
“I will do that. And if something happens like it did before, which I pray it never does, I will tell you what’s going on and let you decide how to proceed from there.”
“Maybe you should tell me what it was about.” He sighed, leaning just a little bit closer, and I told him everything, from the government trying to take the land to the tax error that had taken me completely away from him at the restaurant, and in the mix explaining about my position in the claw and how while, he as my mate would always come first, the claw was my responsibility.
“You carry all of that on your shoulders all of the time?”
“It’s my birthright.” I picked his hand up to kiss it, and when he didn’t pull away it was like winning the lottery. “It will always be there. Can you accept that?”
“I can, and maybe I judged you too harshly at first.
“Nope. I was a Grade-A alphahole. I deserve your ire and I plan to make up for it. May I take you on a date?”
“No cell phone?”
“Cell phone set to my emergency people only.” I couldn’t completely ignore my claw, as much as I might want to please my mate.
“Then I would love to go on a date with you.”
Mate. Mate. Mate. Claim. My cat purred.
“What’s that noise? Do you hear it?”
“This?” I held his hand against my chest which was vibrating. “You made my panther purr.”
11
Corey
Much as I loved the food at the Brazilian restaurant, I decided that place had bad juju. Once we were comfortable with one another, and had gotten to know each other's quirks, we could go back. I suggested we go to the city’s annual carnival for our first proper date. “I’ve been every year since I came to town. Reminds me of when I was a kid.” I’d cross off the days on a calendar and the anticipation would build until the big day arrived. “And we could share candy floss.”
Bryce screwed up a face and twirled his finger in the air. “With rides that go up and down, and around and around at a dizzying pace? That sort of carnival?”
“Mmmm.” His expression and tone let on he wasn’t thrilled. “Or we can do something else. You choose.”
“Nope. My aim is to make it up to you and have the memories of my bad behavior erased from that adorable head.” He kissed me on the nose, and I grabbed his jacket and pulled him closer so I was almost suffocated by his scent.
“Trust me. You have a lot of work to do. It’s going to be long.” I trailed my fingers over his arm. “And hard.” My lips were on his ear and I stuck my tongue in the hollow. Bryce’s body trembled. “And you might need a do-over. Again and again until you get it right.”
Slick covered my ass, and I held my breath hoping Bryce would skip the getting-to-know-you date and tear off my clothes, preferably with his teeth. Instead, he gulped and planted kisses over my face before mumbling, “Carnival it is. I’ll take my motion sickness pills.”
“How does that work when you shift and are off doing panther stuff?” The only panther I was vaguely familiar with was the character Bagheera in The Jungle Book. But since meeting Bryce again, I’d done plenty of research. Into panthers. Not shifters.
My search engine didn’t have a shifter section, obviously, and I’d gathered from something Gabe said that there was a super secret shifter search engine. I’d asked Brad if I could use it. He’d refused, saying it went against shifter law to give a human access to the hidden part of the internet. But I guessed Gabe had used it and I said as much.
Color drained from Brad’s face. “He’s my mate, and as such, he’s part of the bear den.” Before I could say anything, he’d added, �
��And do not try and worm it out of Gabe.”
“I won’t.”
“I need your word, Corey.”
“You have it.”
“Wouldn’t do you any good, though,” he muttered. “Gabe only has access to the online bear shifter universe. Not panthers. Or wolves.” He spat out the last word.
“Doesn’t affect me.” Bryce’s reply brought me back to the present.
“Sorry, what?”
“I don’t suffer from motion sickness when I shift.”
The next evening Bryce picked me up. I could hardly contain my excitement when we parked, and I was giddy with childlike enthusiasm as we wandered amongst the stalls and munched on candied apples. Though Bryce’s response was more measured than mine. And he did peek at his phone more than once which had me tense up thinking his focus would switch from us to his device.
He won a teddy at the shooting gallery after he annihilated the wooden ducks, and he hit the bullseye when doing archery. I took pity on an alpha with two children hanging off him and gave the kids the toys we’d won.
After walking past a woman making cotton candy, Bryce took a detour and bought me some of the spun sugar on a stick.
“Yum. Try some,” I offered.
“Ewww, no.”
I shrugged, pleased I didn’t have to share it with him as he bought a hot dog and practically inhaled it after taking two bites and devouring the whole thing. Was that an insight into how he ate when he was in panther form?
“Oh, the tilt-a-whirl. Let’s go on that, Bryce. Did you take your motion sickness meds?”
“I did,” he answered cautiously. “But I was thinking of something more sedate such as bumper cars.”
“Are you sure you’ve been in a bumper car?” They weren’t what I’d call sedate.
“Can't say I have.”
I pointed into the distance as I glanced longingly at the tilt-a-whirl. “I suppose we could go on the Ferris wheel.”
Bryce blanched. “Heights aren’t my thing.”
No climbing trees for this panther is my guess. Unless, like the motion sickness, it didn’t affect him when he was a big cat!
“But as a huge favor to you, I’ll try the tilting thing.”
“Are you sure?” He nodded and his eyes developed a nervous tic as he eyed the ride. “You don’t have to do this. You have nothing to prove.”
“How bad can it be?” His fake-sounding laughter had me thinking we should pull the plug, but he insisted he could do it.
After buying our tickets, he whispered, “It has seat belts, right?” He clasped my hand as we strapped ourselves into the car and waited for it to begin.
The familiar thrill took over as the ride started and I gave Bryce a reassuring smile. His nails dug into my palm and his other hand gripped the side of the car. The expression frozen on his face was pure terror as we whirled around. It wasn’t as fast as I remembered, and that was probably a good thing. I sort of hoped his phone might fly out of his pocket and break, but no such luck.
A prehistoric, blood-curdling scream erupted from Bryce’s mouth as we twirled around. Poor guy. He was doing this for me. His face changed from white to gray to green. And it occurred to me it wasn’t just motion-sickness. He was terrified.
“Oh, thank God,” he yelled as we came to a stop. His legs were so wobbly and both a ride attendant and I had to help him out. He leaned on me and his harsh breathing had me overwhelmed with guilt.
We sat on a bench and he put his head between his legs as I patted his back. “Bryce, I’m so sorry. Why didn’t you tell me it was this bad?”
“Because I wanted to show you I was a good guy. That I’d do anything for you.”
“That doesn’t include almost passing out from fright.” I bought us sodas, and as we sipped our drinks and Bryce’s breathing returned to normal, I made a decision. “You want us to do things together, right?”
He nodded.
“And that includes activities you don’t normally participate in?”
“Yes, again.”
“Come on. I have an idea that might be more your speed.”
“Crawling into bed and feeling sorry for myself?” he asked.
“Later.” I dragged him along a lane between stalls where hundreds of feet had kicked up dust. “Ta da.”
“A carousel?”
I gazed at the pink and purple horses and the young kids waving to their parents as they went around and around. It was moving so slowly, I could have run around it at twice the speed. A young dad was standing beside his offspring sitting on a horse as the little girl yelled, “Giddy up.”
“Come with me?”
He placed his hand in mine and we each got on a horse. People took pics of us and some of the children were in awe, with one whispering, “Big kids like this too.”
“You did it,” I leaned over as our horses went up and down.
“I did. With your help.”
But when we reached the car, it struck me how different the experience had been from the restaurant. Though Bryce had been uncomfortable and almost passed out, we’d had fun. At least I had and hoped he did too. But he hadn’t been able to ignore his phone completely, and it had bugged me. Maybe I had no right to be annoyed.
When he unlocked the door, I wondered, along with the messages he’d replied to, how many missed calls there were. The feelgood emotions that had taken over while we were at the carnival faded, and I hoped beyond hope we might manage what I called a ‘normal’ relationship.
12
Bryce
Mortified.
I was completely mortified by how I was unable to handle the stupid carnival ride. The tilt-a-whirl—a ride that kids love. And there I was, big bad Alpha of my pack, almost passing out.
But in a way—in a way it meant everything. I was able to go on there and try it—not once worried about what Corey, my mate, would think. Instead my focus was on not puking or passing out or both.
There was no one, not even Iver, that I could be that free with.
I was on cloud nine as we reached the car. I’d not only found my mate, but I liked him too. Which was duh...of course I did...we were mates, fated mates at that, but also it had been a concern of mine. I’d seen enough matings that weren’t as happy as you read about in fairy tales, and while I wasn’t privy to their stories, in the back of my mind I worried that maybe we wouldn’t quite like each other. But no more. I liked him, I was beyond attracted to him, and I felt more open to being myself with him than anyone else.
“Here,” I opened the door for him, being ever the gentleman. “I had fun tonight.”
“I did too.”
I leaned in and kissed his cheek. That was romantic and human, right? At least until my phone buzzed in my pocket and against his thigh. I’d been ignoring the thing the whole time, only taking a peek now and then, not wanting to be bothered unless it was an emergency, but now even being on vibrate was too much. I reached up and cupped his cheek.
“Where to? Ice cream?” There was a cute stand we passed on our way to the carnival. I had no idea if they had good ice cream or just bought the huge buckets from the warehouse stores, but adorable was worth mediocre ice cream and adorable it was.
“I had too much junk food, thanks.” He squished his lip to one side. “I should probably just go home.”
That wasn’t what I wanted to do, at least not in the way he implied. Going home to get naked and slide into him—giving him my knot—that sounded like pure perfection.
“Okay.” I waited until he climbed inside and shut the door beside him. Something happened...something I couldn’t quite figure out. We’d had fun. We ate tons of amazing food. We even left with prizes, and yet—
Maybe I was just reading too much into the entire thing..
I walked around the car and got inside, tossing my phone into the backseat. I’d promised him this was going to be all him and I wasn’t letting anything get in the way of that.
And really? There was something so
freeing about not being tied to that thing. Unless there was an emergency, Iver could handle most everything.
I backed out of the spot slowly and followed the trail of cars. “Looks like everyone else is leaving now too.”
“I think the flat-rate kid bracelet thingy ended about twenty minutes ago.”
“That makes sense. Their parents probably don’t have any more money.” Carnivals were not cheap, and if you had more than one kid, those drinks and games would add up quickly. “Thanks for the rides.”
“What? You hated most of them.” He wasn’t wrong there.
“I couldn’t have done that with anyone else.”
“Being Alpha is that all-encompassing, huh?”
“Sometimes.” I slammed on the brakes as a man walked right out in front of us. Thank gods I was only going five miles an hour. Not that it wouldn’t still hurt. “Sorry.”
“He’s an ass.”
“At least he’s not a dead ass. Can you imagine the paperwork?” I forced a chuckle as the man in question gave me the finger. Just freaking lovely. As if I was the reason he decided to walk out in front of a slowly moving vehicle.
“One of Gabe’s students got his fingers caught in the lecture hall door and the amount of paperwork on that—I can’t even imagine.”
We started back up, the line not much farther ahead than before we stopped.
“I’d love to hear about your work.” It turned me on like nobody’s business to think of him as the hot accountant sitting at his computer studying rows of numbers.
“Okay.” He told me a little bit about his job, not much. Mostly the things you would mention while at the same social event as someone you had no real interest in—just chit chat, his whole demeanor changed from when we were eating cotton candy and laughing.
I just wished I knew why, so I did something radical and asked. “Is everything okay? Did I upset you?” I felt like stupid Joel from Shifter World who was weak and pathetic and always asking for affirmation from the guy he was dating. And it wasn’t even a confirmation that I wanted, that he was into me and could overlook his first impression, just that I hadn’t somehow made things awkward or uncomfortable for him.
Matched To His Panther Page 5