by Нора Робертс
“It’s not in the beer, you dick.” Beckett grinned at Owen. “You should ask her tonight. Asking her at a wedding feels like good luck.”
“I’ve got to work on it.” Owen blew out a breath. “I’ve got to work on the how and when and all that.”
“He’s going to work on it.” Ryder took a pull of his beer. “This’ll be fun.”
* * *
Once their part of prewedding photos was done, Rosie gave Clare another embrace. “I’m going to help with the boys, then I’ll bring your father up.”
“About twenty minutes.” Hope held up her phone. “Owen and I are texting, so I’ll know when the photos are finished. Then we’ll know when Beckett and his party go out to The Courtyard.”
“I’ll check with Owen, don’t worry.”
“You’re texting?” Avery said when Rosie went out. “Remember how this was going to be informal?”
“Informal doesn’t mean sloppy. Guests are already arriving, by the way.”
“Countdown.” Avery picked up the champagne. “Anybody else?”
“Not for me,” Clare began, then frowned. “No, a swallow. I think I should have a swallow for luck.”
“A swallow for the bride, and a full glass for the attendants.”
Hope picked up her glass. “To the bride.”
Clare shook her head. “No, to marriage. To the promises, the compromises, the endurance. That’s what I’d like to drink to.”
“To marriage then,” Hope agreed as they touched glasses.
“And to family,” Clare added after a minute sip. “It’s not just marriage, children when you have them, the parents you came from. It’s this, too. It’s the people who make your life whole and rich and steady. You both do that for me.”
“You’re determined to make us cry,” Avery managed.
“I thought I would.” Clare took another tiny sip, then set her glass down. “But I’m feeling very clear-eyed. I thought about Clint last night. A lot about Clint. And I know, absolutely, he’d be glad I found Beckett. That I have Beckett, and the boys have him. Knowing that makes me happy. And all I want to do now is walk out to The Courtyard, walk to Beckett and the boys, carrying this one,” she said, pressing a hand to her belly. “And make those promises.
“Then I’m going to dance with my husband and our sons.”
“After I touch up your lipstick,” Hope declared.
While Hope fussed, Avery wandered onto the porch. A minute alone, she thought. Just a minute.
But she heard the porch door open, glanced down toward Elizabeth and Darcy. She had company after all. And, she decided, that was fine.
“I can’t figure it out. I’m not sad, but I don’t know if happy’s the word. For Clare, yes. Ecstatic for Clare. But otherwise, I’m somewhere between. I just wonder how it works, you know? I look at her, and I see she’s so sure, not at all nervous, no questions or doubts. What’s it like to feel that way? How do you get to that point?”
She looked over to Vesta, then down Main Street to Turn The Page. That she understood—that commitment, that endurance. But what flipped the switch inside to let someone take those steps for and with another person?
“Doesn’t matter. It’s not about me. It’s a happy day. It’s Clare’s day.”
She turned to go in, saw something on the table between the doors. Frowning, she walked over, picked up a small stone. It was smooth as a cobble, shaped like a heart. It sat in the cup of her hand as she stared at the initials carved in its center.
L. F.B. R.
“Lizzy Ford. ‘B’ for Billy? It must be.” Heart drumming, she looked over. The door remained open, that summer scent fragile as petals.
“Did he give this to you? Billy? He must have. And it . . . endured. But how? How am I holding it right here, right now? How can—”
“Avery!” Hope called out. “Countdown.”
“It’s Clare’s day,” she repeated as she closed the little stone in her hand. “I can’t show them now, but I’ll get it to Owen. I promise.” She laid the hand holding the stone on her heart. “I promise,” she said again.
“Avery!”
“One second!” She hurried in, went straight to her purse. “Lipstick.” She tucked the stone safely inside, wondered if it would be there when she came back.
* * *
As the sun slid toward the western hills, she watched her friends marry, heard their promises to each other, to the children that formed their family, saw the rings they exchanged glint—another promise—in the soft sparkle of light.
Joy, simple and huge, just flowed from them, she realized, in a slow, warm river. She felt it rise in her as well, something lovely and real, steady and strong.
The tears that swam into her eyes were of that joy when they moved together in their first kiss as husband and wife.
Then there were hugs, applause, music. Owen took her hand, led her down the aisle formed by chairs to The Lobby door. More hugs, a few tears, then laughter as Murphy announced, loudly, firmly, he had to pee, right now.
“Pee first, then pictures,” Hope announced. “Bride, groom, wedding party and family. Then Clare, Beckett, and the boys, then Clare and Beckett.” She glanced at the photographer. “Forty-five minutes. That would keep us on the mark.”
“Have you got a stopwatch on you?” Ryder asked.
“In here.” Avery tapped her forehead.
“Clare and Beckett need to be able to dance, eat, have fun,” Hope began.
“I don’t think they’re worried about it,” Ryder pointed out as the bride and groom shared another long kiss. “Relax, Commander.”
“You relax,” Hope muttered, and did her best to herd the group.
Avery considered pulling Owen aside, but the timing didn’t work, the circumstances weighed against it.
It could wait, she told herself, and fell into the moment.
After the pictures, the return of the bride and groom, the first dance, a few toasts, she managed to pull him back inside.
“I want to dance with you.”
“I’m all about that,” she agreed, “but I have to show you something first. Upstairs.”
“There’s also food—it looks good.”
“We’ll get food, drink, dance. We’ll get it all.” She kept his hand clutched in hers as she hurried upstairs. “Backstory. I was standing out on the porch right before we came down. I was feeling . . . pensive maybe. Big day. And she came out. Or anyway, the door to the porch opened. I was thinking about Clare and Beckett, getting married, taking vows—that sort of thing. Wondering, really, how people get up the spine or whatever it takes to move on that.”
“It’s not spine,” he began.
“Whatever.” She unlocked T&O, drew him in. “Hope called me in, and when I turned around, this was on that table between the doors.”
She closed her eyes a moment, reached into her bag, let out a sigh of relief when her fingers closed over the stone.
“A rock. God, that’s earth-shattering.”
“Shut up. Look at it, Owen.”
He took it when she shoved it at him, turned it over. His expression shifted from amusement to puzzlement, then wonder.
“She gave this to you.”
“She left it on the table. It wasn’t there when I went out. I’m sure it wasn’t. Then it was. I wouldn’t say she gave it to me, but she wanted me to see it. Don’t you think?”
“I’m still trying to get on board with how she could have this, or make it materialize. Or . . . I don’t know what.”
“I decided not to think too hard about that or my brain might explode. He must’ve given it to her. The shape, the initials.”
“Why would he give her a rock? When you think about it—”
“It’s a heart, with their initials inside. Sentimental, right?”
“I guess so. B for Billy works. William. R. It might help some having the first initial of his last name.”
“You and Hope are the ones looking into it, so I wanted to
get it to you as soon as I could. Hope’s helping run the show here, so you’re elected. But we should get it to her after the reception.”
“She gave it to you.”
“Lizzy? No, she just left it where I’d find it.”
“Not much difference.”
“She’d want Hope to have it. Hope’s her descendent.”
“She didn’t leave it where Hope would find it.” He handed it back to Avery. “You need to keep it.”
“It doesn’t feel right.”
“I figure there’s a reason she left it for you. Maybe holding on to it awhile will help you find the reason. And meanwhile I’ll look for William R. We’ll fill Hope in after the wedding.”
“All right, but I feel weird about it.” She traced the initials before she tucked it back in her purse. “And if she takes it back, she takes it back.”
“Did I tell you, you look amazing?”
Her eyes twinkled at him. “You might have mentioned it in passing.”
“You do. And I . . .” No, he thought, not on impulse, not on his brother’s day, even if it was lucky. “We need to get back down. My brother doesn’t get married every day.”
“You’re right.”
“What did you mean about spine?” he asked her as they headed down.
“What?”
“About needing spine to get married. You need spine to, I don’t know, go to war or take on the IRS or skydive.”
“I just meant people have to gear up to take that step into until-death-or-divorce-do-us-part.”
It struck him wrong, just wrong. “Were you always this cynical?”
“I’m not cynical.” Even the word annoyed her. “Just realistic—and curious. I’m a curious realist.”
“Take a look at that,” he suggested when they’d walked back out where couples danced—Clare and Beckett, his mother, her father, Clare’s parents and more. “That’s real.”
Real, he thought again, and what he wanted. What he wanted with Avery.
“And it’s nice. Really nice. A moment. An important moment. But there are thousands of moments after the party. And speaking of that, why aren’t you dancing with me?”
“Good idea.”
He did his best to keep it light, but something had shifted between them with her words. And he understood she felt it, too.
* * *
She didn’t have time to brood about it, even to think about it. They only had a week to finish the last details on the house, to load in furniture, stock the kitchen.
It reminded Avery of the final push on the inn, but this time with Beckett and Clare off on their honeymoon, they were short two pairs of hands.
Still, that sense of déjà vu trailed through as she and Hope loaded dishes, glassware, flatware, pots, pans, platters into cupboards.
“She’s not going to be disappointed she didn’t do all this herself, right?”
Hope shook her head. “I thought about that, second-guessed, third-guessed. Then I thought about her coming back from a week off—the work facing her at the store, the kids, the new routine, and being pregnant. I really think she’ll be relieved not to face hauling boxes, unpacking, and the rest.”
“I think so, too—but sometimes I fourth-guess. It’s great the boys are spending a few days down with Clint’s parents. It’s good for all of them, but I have to admit I miss them. And being able to use those tireless legs to run little errands.”
“We’re nearly there. With Justine and Rose handling the clothes, the linens, Owen and Ryder muscling in the big stuff, we’ll have it perfect for their homecoming.”
Hope paused, fingers reaching for her phone. “I should check, make sure Carolee ordered the flowers.”
“You know she did. Relax, Commander.”
“If he calls me that again, I may kick him in the balls.” Hope paused, rolled her shoulders. “It’s a beautiful house—the wood, the details, the sense of space.”
“The Montgomerys do good work.”
“They do. Speaking of the Montgomerys, what’s going on with you and Owen?”
“Nothing.”
Hope glanced toward the stairs. “Justine and Rose are up on the second floor. Owen and Ryder are getting another load. It’s just you and me.”
“I don’t know exactly. Things have been a little off since the wedding. My fault, I guess—sort of. When I showed him the heart stone, I made some comment about marriage. I do till death or divorce, something like that. He thinks I’m cynical.”
“I wonder why?”
“I’m not.”
“No, you’re not. But you put your mother’s baggage in your own closet. Eventually, you’re just going to have to pitch it out.”
“I don’t. Maybe I do,” she admitted, annoyed with herself. “But I really think I’ve got it down to an overnight bag. Now it feels weird between us, and that’s the last thing I want. We’ve been friends forever. In fact—”
She glanced around, making absolutely sure they were alone. “The other night I dug this out of my keepsake box.”
Avery opened her purse, unzipped a pocket. And pulled out a plastic ring in the shape of a pink heart. “He actually gave me this when I was about six, and crushing on him.”
“Oh, Avery, it’s so cute. So sweet.”
“It was, it is. Gum-ball-machine ring. He was just playing along with me, but it put me on top of the world. He does that kind of thing. The sweet thing.”
“You kept it, all this time.”
“Of course. My first engagement ring.” To amuse them both, she slipped it on, wiggled her fingers. But oddly seeing it there made her feel a little sad. “And now something’s off between us,” she continued as she pulled it off again. “I think he must want to take a step back and—”
She broke off when she heard the door open, and mimed zipping her lips as she tucked the ring back in her purse.
* * *
While D.A. lay on the kitchen floor, obviously exhausted, she helped arrange tables, lamps, pillows. When duty called Hope back to the inn, Avery unpacked towels, set out soaps, moving from master to kids’ bath, to guest bath, to half bath, to lower-level bath.
It was full dark when she came upstairs again, and stopped to grin at the great room. Homey, she thought, comfortable, and pretty.
She heard the sound of hammering, moved through to the playroom. Owen, tool belt slung at his hips, hung a framed X-Men poster.
“You put the cubbies together.”
He glanced back at her. “Ryder did it before he took off.”
“He’s gone?”
“We’re about done. Mom said to tell you she and Rosie will be back tomorrow, after a grocery store trip for fresh produce.”
“Great. I guess you’re right. I can’t think of much else to do. I wasn’t sure we’d make it, and we’re a full day ahead.”
“We had a lot of hands.”
“And you and Hope with your checklists. This is a great room. Fun. happy. The house feels that way, too.”
“Yeah, it does.”
“Do you want a good-job beer?”
“I wouldn’t mind it.”
She went out, opened two. They were so freaking polite, she thought. So matter-of-fact. So damn weird.
Enough, she decided as she set them on the kitchen counter. She waited until he’d unstrapped his tool belt. “Are you mad at me?”
“No.” He gave her a steady look out of quiet blue eyes. “Why would I be?”
“I don’t know. But we—you—something hasn’t seemed all the way right since the wedding.”
He considered her as he took a pull on the beer. “Maybe you’re right.”
“If this isn’t working for you, I wish—”
“Why do you go there? Why do you automatically go to it not working, it not lasting, it not sticking?”
“I don’t mean it like that. I—” When he waved that away, walked to the far window, she set her jaw. “You are mad at me.”
“I’m getting there.” He to
ok another pull on the beer, then crossed back to set it on the counter. And looked her dead in the eye. “How would you feel if I said it wasn’t working for me? No bullshit, Avery, straight truth. How would you feel if I said I was done with it?”
The jaw she’d set wanted to tremble. And everything inside her trembled with it. “You’d break my heart. Is that what you need to hear? You need to know you could do that?”
“Yeah.” He closed his eyes, let out a breath. “Yeah. That’s exactly what I needed to hear, and what I needed to know.”
“Why would you want to hurt me that way? You’re not a hard person. You’re not cold. Why would you hurt me that way? If you want to step back, you could do it without being cruel.”
“Stop it.” A world of patience sounded in his voice. “I’m not stepping back. I don’t want to step back. That’s just it. But you don’t believe in me, in yourself. In us.”
“I do. Why would you think I didn’t?” Even as the words came out of her mouth, she knew. “I say stupid things sometimes. I think stupid things sometimes. You should know me well enough to get that.”
“I do know you, Avery. I know you’re loyal and generous, you’re tough and ambitious.”
Since Beckett’s wedding, Owen had looked for the answer, worked the problem. He thought he had it.
“Avery, you question yourself too much, you worry too much you’re something and someone you’re not. Because you’re nothing like her. Nothing, and you never have been. It pisses me off you don’t see that.”
“I’m working on it.”
“Okay.” He started to pick up his beer again, stopped. “No, it’s not okay. We’ll end up just circling around and getting nowhere. It’s not okay because I’m in love with you.”
“Oh my God.”
“I probably always have been. It’s taken a long time for it to sink in, so I figured you needed time to do the same. But it’s enough now. Do you see this place?”
“Yes. Owen—”
“It’s not just a damn house—a damn good house. It’s a place to build, to come back to, to depend on.” Everything he felt for her filled him. Everything he wanted surrounded him.