And seeing Hayden and I together at the party on Friday night, I knew they would all be thinking the same thing, just like Charlie had been that morning. It was only too easy to put two and two together and realize that Hayden and I must have had a fight.
Of course, it could be something else. They could think it had something to do with Mom. Or maybe that I was sick. But either way, it made me feel a little embarrassed.
But when I had called Ace, he recommended that I show up at his brother’s house sooner, rather than later. He told me that he’d make sure Hayden got there soon. So off I went. I had an apology to make.
I hadn’t expected Hayden to try to beat me to the apology, though. And when I listened to him, I was amazed to realize that he was probably right to apologize. I had come over there in need of comfort the night before, and he had turned me away. But at the same time, that was all my fault. I could never blame him for that.
It was almost amusing how we both seemed to think that the other person was in the right, even after the apologies had been said. Maybe that was the foundation of a strong relationship—the ability to see the other person’s point of view to the point where you could never really be mad at them.
I knew that Hayden had never meant to push me away like that. I could tell that he cared about me, and I knew that he probably would have been gutted to hear that I’d spent most of the night crying. And at the same time, I could tell that he was coming around when he admitted that the reason he had never gotten a paternity test was that he was afraid Booker wasn’t really his and would be taken away to live with his real dad.
That admission made my heart ache for him. I knew just how much Hayden cared about his son. His son—regardless of blood. There was no taking Booker away from him. But hearing Hayden say that was the source of his fear made me even more certain that he should get a paternity test done. And put those fears aside once and for all. He might be able to keep from focusing on it most of the time, but at the end of the day, his worry must be eating at him.
Still, I didn’t want to talk about that just yet, not while the wounds from last night were still so fresh. Instead, I leaned into his arms and admitted that I loved him.
The words slipped out more easily than I’d expected. I hadn’t planned to say them just yet. But there was something in Hayden’s eyes that told me that he wasn’t just afraid he would lose Booker, he was afraid that he would lose me. And that resonated deep within my soul.
And anyway, where was the harm in saying that I loved him when Hayden had said those words right back to me?
Now, as he led me into the house, I could see every bit of that love in his heated gaze.
He caught my hands, leading me backwards up the stairs, but where normally, things would be heated the whole way there—clothes left in a heap in the front hall—this time, he was patient. There was a certain tension in the air, not unpleasant. One that practically hummed with the energy surging between us.
In the bedroom, I slowly started stripping off my clothes, watching as Hayden’s hungry gaze roamed across each inch of skin that was revealed. There was something about the way that he looked at me that made me shudder with desire. It reminded me of something my mom had said at a wedding one time, “If he ever looks like that, you’ll know you found a keeper.”
Hayden was looking at me like that all right. He kept his eyes trained on me as he let his clothes fall to the floor as well. Then, he reached for my hand and led me over to the bed.
He spread me out on the sheets, crawling between my legs and smoothing his hands across my skin. There was a certain awe to the way he stared at me, like he could barely believe we were here. That he was somehow lucky enough to get to touch me like this.
And me, I felt the same way about him. That love that I had felt before in whispers crashed down on me now, the roar of my heart thudding in my ears as my fingers trailed down along his chest. He kissed me until I was breathless, my hips rocking up to meet his, my body begging for stimulation in my most sensitive of areas.
He took his time, though, kissing first along my jawline and then my neck, sucking a mark into the skin just below my earlobe and then soothing it with soft laves of his tongue. His lips trailed south, leaving kisses in their wake. I was a trembling and needy mess before he had even reached my breasts.
He lingered there for a moment, his tongue flicking out to tease my nipples as his hands stroked firmly down my curves to finally rest on my hips, keeping them from their restless shifting. I nearly sobbed with how badly I needed more; Hayden smirked as though he wasn’t just as turned on as I was.
But I could tell from the way his cock nudged against my thigh, from the way it bobbed with each pulse of lust that shot through Hayden’s body, that he was just as ready as I was for something more.
If only I could get him to move faster.
But Hayden seemed intent on taking his sweet time, on getting to know my body like no one ever had before. His dark gaze never left mine as he explored his way across my soft skin, leaving no part untouched. His caresses were maddening, nearly what I needed but promising just so much more. It wasn’t long before his grip on my hip was doing no good, unable to keep me from my desperate squirming beneath him.
And that made Hayden smirk at me as though I had given him some great prize.
“Please,” I begged.
Hayden’s grin widened. “Only because you asked nicely,” he teased, sliding his hand down across my abdomen, to the sensitive folds between my legs. I mewled as he toyed with my clit, watching as my expression shifted to one of near-ecstasy.
I was breathing hard already, able to feel the slickness between my legs practically dripping out of me as I waited for him to push inside of me.
Some women craved sweetness like this, I knew, but the tenderness was almost too much for me to handle. I had never had a guy take his time like this before. Not that the sex I had was always quick and frantic, but normally, it seemed like there was a script to be followed and that he was just doing his best to press all the right buttons.
Not so here. Hayden made this love-making seem like a work of art. Like he was really invested in getting me off as good as he possibly could. When he finally entered me, it was a long, slow drag that let me feel every inch of his length and girth.
He rocked his hips forward in a steady movement that only emphasized the press of his dick inside of me. He shifted until he found the angle that gave me the most pleasure, still watching my face closely for each reaction. But it was hard for me to keep my gaze on him in response; my eyes kept slipping shut as the pleasure within me grew hotter and hotter.
He started to speed up his thrusts, still nailing that special spot in my core that made me want to scream out his name. I bit my lip to hold back my cries and moans, at least until Hayden caught my lower lip with his thumb, gently prying it free.
“Come on, I want to hear you,” he groaned, pressing his forehead against my shoulder as he picked up the pace yet again.
And how could I resist that? I gasped and then called out his name, shaking as I came closer and closer to the edge. I wrapped my arms around Hayden, keeping him close to me, my fingertips digging into his ass, wordlessly begging him for more and faster fucking.
We came in unison, and even when I could barely breathe, there was no way of stopping the noises that I was making as he gave a couple of final jerks before falling against me, his breathing ragged. Stars glittered behind my closed eyelids as I tried to catch my breath, to recover, to come back into myself.
Trembling as he pulled out of me, Hayden—ever observant—noticed, smoothing a hand gently down my side, a soft smile on his face.
I nuzzled his chest, curling my whole body towards his. That tension from before seemed to still be thrumming there between us, but now it was deep within my bones and blood, making me drowsy, sated and full of love.
Hayden kissed my forehead, keeping his arms wrapped around me.
“So, there’s
something that I need to talk to you about,” I finally managed to say. But I couldn’t look up at Hayden, my nervousness suddenly overwhelming, and I tried to keep things casual, my fingers still tracing aimless patterns across his chest.
“What’s that?” Hayden asked, and I could tell that in spite of my nonchalant tone, he had picked up on some deeper undertone, and was instantly on edge.
I tried to think of things from his perspective for a moment. What did he think that I wanted to talk to him about? And more importantly, if I told him that I wanted him to take a real position at the winery, would he even consider it? I knew that it wasn’t his idea of the best kind of job in the world, but maybe for me, he would take it. At least until I found someone else who could replace Charlie.
And otherwise, what if I told him I was already in love with him? Was it possible that he would reciprocate? I could barely imagine it, to be honest. Not because I thought that I didn’t deserve to be loved, curves and all. No matter how many times Mom reminded me that there was someone out there for everyone. It had never been a matter of confidence for me.
No, it was something much deeper than that. I wanted to know that someone like Hayden was going to be there for me. That I wasn’t just wasting my time. I wanted to know that he cared for me before I could let myself fall head over heels for him.
It was why this thing with Hayden was so strange and unexpected. To be perfectly honest, I had never imagined that I could fall for someone this quickly or irrationally. It just wasn’t who I was. But on the other hand, I knew there was no question about it when it came to Hayden. I was head over heels for him.
I only hoped that he felt the same way about me.
Well, time to find that out. I took a deep breath, my fingers finally stilling against his chest as I peeked up at him through my eyelashes. “I know it’s probably too soon to say this,” I slowly said, “but Hayden, I love you.”
Those were all the words that I could get out, and they seemed so stupid. But from the way that Hayden smiled, I could tell he was happy to hear them and made me feel he loved me too.
So even though I didn’t think he would go for the other part of it, even though I was sure that he would think I was out of my mind, I mustered up the courage to say the rest of it. “Charlie is going to be leaving the winery, and I would really like for you to step into his job.”
There was dead silence in the room, and I could barely look up to see his reaction. I knew that the job wasn’t the kind that he wanted. Not least of which because he wouldn’t want me as a boss long-term. But as much as I knew that our work styles clashed, the fact remained that I wanted him as an employee. I just couldn’t help it.
He was good for me. And I wanted nothing more than to be good for him in the same way.
Hayden was silent for what seemed like forever. But he didn’t pull away from me, and that, at least, seemed like a good sign. Finally, he sighed. “Are you sure that that’s such a good idea?”
“No,” I said quite frankly. “In fact, it’s probably a terrible idea. But I want you there all the same.”
Hayden considered to chew things over in his head for a moment. “I’ll think about it,” he finally said.
Slowly, I smiled up at him. “That’s all I’m asking,” I told him.
Chapter 39
Hayden
I knocked on Mallory’s office door and poked my head inside. I couldn’t help but grin as I saw the look of concentration on her face. There were a couple of errant strands of hair sticking out from her ponytail, and I could tell it must have been a busy morning if I had caught her absently running her fingers back through it.
Things were picking up around the vineyard like I couldn’t believe, now that the weather was starting to turn warmer. And I was just glad to be part of it all. Technically, I had taken over Charlie’s job handling the company’s finances, but Mallory let me get involved in so much more than that. She really wanted to share this place with me, and I loved that.
She wanted to share it with Booker, too, and that was almost better.
Mallory finally clicked her keyboard a couple of last times and looked up at me. “Hey,” she said. “What’s up?”
I held up the bag holding our lunch. “I grabbed us some food. You ready for a lunch break?”
Mallory groaned. “Oh God, you’re a life-saver,” she said. “I’m starving.”
I grinned and moved further into the office, sitting down across from her and pulling out the goods. “Busy morning?” I asked.
Mallory nodded emphatically as she took a bite of her fried rice. “Like you wouldn’t believe,” she said. “I can’t believe you’ve managed to secure us so much new business in the last couple months.”
I tried not to flush with pride, but I couldn’t help the broadening of my grin as I shrugged at her. “Well, you guys bottle up some pretty good wine,” I said. “Makes it an easy sell.”
“By the way,” Mallory said, grabbing an envelope and handing it to me. “This came in the mail yesterday, I think. I forget to check it when I got home last night, but I grabbed it this morning on my way in.”
I stared at the thick manila envelope, instantly recognizing the address on the return label. I glanced up at Mallory and saw that she was grinning encouragingly at me. Slowly, I flipped the envelope over and sliced it open. My eyes scanned the first couple lines of text and then drifted over the rest of the page almost sightlessly.
The paternity test.
Slowly, I grinned at Mallory. “Well?” she asked.
“He’s mine,” I said, unable to keep the fierce enthusiasm from my voice.
“He always was,” Mallory said, laughing. “But how awesome is it that he really is your biological son.” She paused. “Have I ever told you what an awesome father I think you are?”
I laughed and took another bite of my food, but I kept looking back down at the test results in my hand. Mallory had finally convinced me that it was time to know for sure whether Booker was mine. Between the medical records and the young boy’s questions, there were certain things that this test could prove that my gut instinct just never could.
But in the end, it wasn’t like this was any surprise. Booker was mine. Like Mallory had said, he always had been.
“So about tonight,” Mallory said a little while later.
“We’re still going over to your mom’s?” I asked.
Mallory nodded. “I’m still not really sure what the plan is since she has been maddeningly cryptic about it. But I have a feeling it has something to do with Booker’s birthday being right around the corner.”
I laughed. “I’ll bet it does,” I said. “She spoils that boy rotten.”
Mallory laughed as well. “Yeah, it’s a wonder after the way she brought me up,” she said, shaking her head. “Not that I ever really needed more, but there definitely weren’t any state-of-the-art toys when I was a kid,” she paused. “If it bothers you, I’ll try and tell her to cut back.”
I shook my head. “I’ve always wanted Booker to have everything that he wants. Within reason, of course,” I told her. “And besides, he’s still a good kid. It’s not like he acts like a brat, no matter how spoiled he gets.”
Mallory looked relieved, and I knew she had probably dreaded the thought of trying to stand up to her mother about that. Her mother was definitely a powerful force to be reckoned with. But she was sweet to Booker, and she treated me almost like a son, even though I was just Mallory’s boyfriend.
Something that I was hoping to change at some point. I already knew that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with Mallory. But I wasn’t quite ready to propose yet. I wanted to find the perfect ring, first. And then find the perfect time to pop the question. My gut told me that it wasn’t time yet.
And my gut, I thought as I glanced again at the paternity test results, seemed to know what was what.
“How’s your mom doing anyway?” I asked Mallory.
“Still getting stronger every day,�
� Mallory said, nodding at me. “I went with her to her doctor’s appointment this morning, and he said that the cancer is still fully in remission. They’re not sure how it happened, and of course, there’s always the chance that it could come back, or come back worse. But for right now, it sounds like she’s going to be around for a good long time ahead of us.”
I smiled, knowing just how much that must mean to Mallory. Heck, it meant a lot to me, too. I was starting to like the old woman. And I’d hated hearing her talk of how she might die at any minute. That was laid to rest—for now at least.
“Anyway, I know we both drove in this morning since I had to be here so early, but I was thinking that maybe you could drive us straight to Booker’s school to pick him up, and then straight over to Mom’s house,” Mallory continued. “Then we can carpool again tomorrow morning.”
I wrinkled my nose playfully. “Are you saying that you need me to be here by 9 a.m.?” I asked her, even though I had been arriving pretty early lately anyway.
Mallory giggled. “Actually,” she said, her eyes twinkling, “I was thinking that maybe you could keep me in bed a while longer instead. I could use an excuse to play hooky for an hour or two. Lord knows I’ve been putting in more than enough overtime lately.”
“Now that,” I said, “sounds like a fantastic plan.” I glanced over my shoulder towards the door, already contemplating how much we could get away with in here today. It wouldn’t be the first time we had had sex in the office.
But this time, Mallory shook her head, grinning at me. “Unfortunately, I have a meeting in ten minutes that I have to attend,” she said. But she winked at me. “Soon.”
“Soon,” I echoed in what was practically a growl. I smiled wickedly at her and cleaned up the trash that remained from our lunch. “I’ll get out of your hair,” I told her. “But come and get me whenever you’re ready to leave later.”
I gave her a quick peck on the cheek and headed back to my office, body still thrumming with excitement as I contemplated how lucky I was to have a son I loved, a job that made me happy, and a girlfriend who was the best woman in the world.
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