Only Human

by Maria Bradley

  I’m going to see if there’s any flatbread left from last night’s dinner. I seriously can’t stomach anything else tonight. What if I was to drink a jug of blood and wake up with a volcano on my face for my date with Garok? I was reading about young Humans years ago, and they used to get volcanic spots that erupted right on the tip of their noses. Especially if they were going on a first date with someone they liked! I guess it wasn’t all sunlight and crystallized roses eh?

  Great, I got some bread, and mother visited the Ancient Arts shop while I was at school. That is where they sell all the old fashioned implements and ingredients needed to recreate human activities. You would think I would love it in there, but I always feel like I’m being watched. It could be ‘a sprat to catch a mackerel,’ to use an old human saying. It means it could be used as bait, to lure any beings in the human condition and expose them. Anyway, because mother made a rare visit, I am having pasta for dinner! I hope she bought ten hundred tons of it and freezes it so I can have if forever. OMG, it better not give me a volcano on my nose!

  I’m going to crack on with my homework now Amica, eat and then sleep. I will talk to you tomorrow night after my date. Forgot to tell you, I am not telling the parents. I’ll bring a change of clothes and go straight from school. They are too cautious Amica, they wouldn’t let me go. I have to risk it; I can’t breathe trapped in here. Wish me luck! X

  12.01.3012

  It is dies Veneris nocte, and I have everything ready in my gym bag. Hope mother doesn’t realise there is no Gym practice tonight. I’ve borrowed one of her lipsticks too. It is okay, I’ll ask her after I use it and when she says no, I won’t be using it then, so no harm done!

  Just to let you know friend, you may think that you are here in my room, waiting for news of my outstandingly perfect evening with Garok. You are not! You are in my head and heart, guiding and instructing me, as I endeavour to captivate and seduce said youth! Sorted!! I’m so nervous I could vomit!

  I am in LOVE!!! Here’s how it went down. School was horrendous; I couldn’t concentrate for one second. Maths was my first lesson, which is alien to me to begin with. My last paper received a superb ‘D’. That is the only book which Simone never steals from my bag. Why am I telling you this rubbish first? You want to know about Garok don’t you? Well, he was next to me at registration and during Maths, as usual; incidentally, he received an ‘A’, for his efforts.

  He made no reference to the fact that we were going out later, just said, ‘Hello,’ in his gruff voice, and turned his attention to schoolwork. I was confused; I began to think that I had misunderstood the whole situation. He had definitely asked me to go out with him hadn’t he? Those were his exact words ‘Will you go out with me on dies Veneris nocte?’ He must have seen my puzzled expression because he glanced at me and squeezed my hand.

  That was it!! I floated aimlessly through the rest of the night until the last lesson. When the bell rang, I shot to the loo to get ready, but guess who was waiting outside when I emerged in my shorts? The demon from hell, that’s who!! SIMONE! She screwed up her perfect little face, and viewed me as you would a slug, sliming all over your dinner plate. My jaw must have dropped to the floor. She is the last person I would like to know my business. Any member of her clan would not be above ringing my parents and asking why I was all dressed up. Ours is an incestuous community, with Vampires that not only have huge teeth, but also enormous, interfering noses!

  There I was, frozen, and waiting for the inevitable, soul-destroying epitaphs to rain from Simone’s ruby lips, when Garok turned up. He stepped right in front of the witch, and took my hand into his. He had to yank me to get me mobile (I was still stunned) and then we simply left the school grounds. Not one word did he utter to Simone as he passed her, and I can well imagine her face as we left. She’s probably seething! I’ll pay for that on dies Lunae nocte, at school!

  We walked hand in hand as far as Lipton Park, without saying a word. My hand was tingling as he held it, and I could hardly breathe. I’ve never been so aware of another person in my life. The streetlamps are very frequent on Loam Street, one every couple of pavement slabs. It’s quite bright, but when we turned into the park, it grew darker with each step. This isn’t a problem for true Vamps, but for someone like me? You see where this is going? I walked straight into a park bench!

  I dropped my schoolbag, my uniform, and my dignity in one fell swoop! Strangely, it was all worth it, because he smiled, nay, laughed, as he picked up my stuff, and the ice was broken between us. I was with him for one hour, thirty two minutes and twelve seconds exactly, and they were the best hour, minutes, and seconds of my life!

  I talked mostly about mundane things, carefully skirting around the human issue, of course. Frustrating for me, because that was the issue I really wanted to talk about. His fangs look real, though maybe a little smaller than my cousin Vamps of the same age. His eyes are larger than I’ve seen before, but cat-like, identical in colour to all Vamps.

  He did a lot of gazing into my eyes, whether that was because he thinks I am incredibly beautiful (I wish) or he’s trying to suss out if I’m human, I don’t know. He seemed concerned about this field trip coming up as well. He says his clan are very poor (third class) and they have already paid out enough just getting him into The Manor school.

  I’ll just explain Amica, as in school, the real world is separated into classes. There are Royal, First class, Second class, Third class and Clones. Each year, the adults of each clan have to declare their earnings to the Elders; they are categorized and then placed into their respective classes; the results are published and distributed to every citizen so that everyone knows their place.

  It’s a ridiculous system that breeds inflated, egotistical Simone’s, and dissatisfied, undervalued Garoks. I made sure to tell him that we barely reach second class status, which is true. Anyway he is Royalty class in my eyes, more so, now that we are getting to know each other.

  We are going to try and make sure that we are in the same group when we go to the Capital. We shouldn’t because we are from different classes, but Mrs Greko is a dear, and a bit scatter-brained, she probably won’t even notice!

  I’m digressing again aren’t I? I'll get back to my date, and the best part of the whole experience. We had been talking for about an hour; wandering around the park, and still holding hands. I felt like we were one person, perfectly in sync with each step, and happy just being together. I knew that I would have to go pretty soon because the parents would be returning from work. I said as much to Garok, and I could see the sadness return to his face, like a shadow over sunlight.

  I was glad! How wicked does that sound to you? I wouldn’t cause him pain for all the sunlight in the entire world! It’s just that his reaction told me that he must like me and wanted more time with me. You have no idea how good it felt to know that.

  We walked towards the exit of Lipton Park, and just before we reached it, he stopped and brought us both to a standstill. The largest ancient tree in our Sector was to our left, and he guided us towards it. My heart was beating so hard, I thought it would jump right out of my chest, Amica. He let go of my hand and faced me, then while he was looking deep into my eyes, it happened, the kiss!!

  He touched my lips with his, and I felt it throughout my whole body. I was on fire from head to toe. I was devastated when he pulled away, but he took my face in his hands and kissed my eyelids, my nose, and brushed my lips once more. NEVER have I felt like that before! I would have declared my humanity and travelled the world with him in that second. I am his, now and forever more!!

  He walked me to the end of my street, then and as I turned and watched him as he walked away; he looked back at me and smiled. I want so much to live now, to remain with him. I am chosen, I feel it, and when I am older he will be my mate.

  Chapter Four

  THE ORDINATIO AND THE ELDERS

  19.01 3012

  It’s the field trip to The Capital tonight friend. I am shaking from hea
d to toe as I’m getting ready. Mother and father are worse than me; in fact, I wouldn’t be in such a state if they had left me alone to get through it myself.

  No-one must be allowed near my backpack, in case my ‘accessories,’ are discovered, i.e. neutralizer, spare fangs and contacts. I must do bathroom checks as often as possible, to check I’m not melting! (The whitener can smudge if I’m hot). I must stay at the back of the class when we enter the Ordinatio building, and under no circumstances must I speak directly to any of the Elders. One last thing; I need to consume at least four pints of Clone blood a day, in public, to convince all concerned that I am a full blown, dead as a doornail, blood sucking, Vampire girl! This is not going to be easy! Garok is here; got to go, talk to you later friend.

  We are on our way Amica! I am on the train and trying to look excited as we trundle along to The Capital. The worst thing happened as we were boarding the train at Manx station. I didn’t notice her, but Simone and crew were right behind Garok and I. As Garok sat down she elbowed me out of the way and sat right next to him.

  He got up of course, but by this time there were another pile of students pushing behind us. It was chaos, everyone was trying to get window seats or sit with their own group. Mrs Greko eventually yelled with that nervous, wobbly voice she uses, and ordered us all to sit where we were, right that second! That wouldn’t have made the slightest bit of difference normally, but the train conductor was coming up behind her. This seven foot vamp is a cross between an ancient sabre toothed tiger, and a giant walrus. Not to be messed with!

  That is how I have ended up here next to Lunar, daughter of Sidik. She’s okay I guess, I’ve known her since I was eleven, but I’ve never really spoken to her. She’s a little like me, and doesn’t mix if she can help it. She is writing in a journal too, maybe she’s a lot like me? Could she be human?

  Oh my, I’m losing the plot altogether, I’m still not even sure if Garok is human, let alone anyone else. You are unquestionably human Amica! I see you in my heart and mind everywhere I go. You are sitting with me right now, with your sweet smile and understanding eyes. You have long, yellow hair, brown eyes and an hour-glass figure. You come alive in the day as we sleep, and dance around the barren and forbidden lands. You eat anything you like, and you long for the day Garok and I can join you, and build a new world in the sunshine! See! You are so real to me that I have even told Garok about you. It is best he knows I have a creative and romantic mind, or simply that I’m bonkers. That is up to him.

  I wonder what Simone is saying to him? They are two rows in front of me but on the opposite side. All I can see is her head bobbing up and down as she talks and gestures with her hands. That bitchy moron, better keep her hands off my mate! He seems to be just looking out of the window most of the time. She’s so pretty though, how can he resist?

  She is a category one student, (first class by default, through her clan’s status). She wouldn’t be within a mile of a third class student normally. What is she playing at? How much longer are we on this stupid train anyway? I’m signing off for a bit friend. Got to keep my eye on the enemy, who’s currently sizing up my man!

  We have arrived at last, thank God! If I had to watch that vixen drooling over Garok for one more minute, I wouldn’t be responsible for my actions. It’s three a.m., and there’s just time to descend to The Underground B&B, eat something, and get to the pit.

  We are all having supper together apparently, including the teachers, so I’m going to have to be extremely careful. I must drink at least one bottle of blood and act like I’m thoroughly enjoying it. Vamp adults are open and almost savage when they eat. It seems when the D.N.A. reaches maturity and is no longer distracted with the mammoth task of growing, the entire instinct of the Vampire is complete and is very difficult to control.

  After the Great War, hundreds of years ago, the world was in a state of anarchy. Vampires had been fighting and killing for over a hundred years, and all of their vilest instincts were brought to the fore. It was why they were triumphant. How could they lose, when they felt no emotion or compassion? They bulldozed over the human race with no remorse, and it was the human’s, actual humanity that killed them. They were crippled with pain and loss, pummelled and manipulated by the Vampires so badly that they would have done anything for the pain to stop.

  How come I always seem to be spouting history at you friend? My point was that the Vampires didn’t know how to control their wild behaviour, and began killing each other. The Elders in the Ordinatio, (government) were there during the vamp’s victory, and were the first of the Vamps to restore order and create laws. They introduced the programme of self-discipline through ‘Controlare’. It includes, isolating oneself as soon as the madness tries to take over; repeated physical exercise, meditation, and a diet, which is double the amount of blood usually consumed. It worked for the most part, and the vamp’s true nature only peeps out of its cage a little during mealtimes. Phew, glad to have gotten that off my chest. Can you tell I adore history Amica?

  Supper was horrible, I knew it would be. The only good point was the fact that Garok managed to sneak in and sit beside me. The dining area was dark, except for two lamps on each end of an enormous wooden table. We were each given a bowl of blood (yeah I said it, a bowl). There was no other way to drink it, so we just had to pick it up and aim! Blood was dribbling down everyone’s chin as they missed their mouth, and I could feel my stomach turnover.

  I had to get out of there and quick, but that would draw attention to me immediately. On the other hand, if I threw up all over the table, it might just have caught their eye! I had no choice, I had to do it; I rushed out in search of a loo, and didn’t look back.

  It’s now about 4.30 a.m. and sunrise is at 5.56 a.m. I’m in the girl’s pit room, not really knowing what to do next. I’m scared to death of the questions I’ll be asked when the other girls come into the dormitory. I wish Garok could sleep in here with us; at least I would have an ally in the camp.

  All I can think of saying, is that I’ve drank so much blood this evening, that I just couldn’t fit anymore in. I know! I’ll say I felt The Fever, and had to isolate myself from the others. I’m a little young for that, but I’ll say that I am an early developer. It is unlikely, but it’s not unheard of in this generation.

  I can hear someone coming, someone wearing heels so it must be a teacher. I hope it’s Greko! No, there’s more than one person walking, and I can hear giggling. It’s Simone and her cronies.

  ‘Awe poor sick Aecia; can’t drink blood from a bowl, doesn’t like the mess we made. You wouldn’t think she was from a third class clan would you, with all her refinement?’

  I’m not reacting Amica, I’m just continuing to talk to you, and writing down what she says. I’ve found that her verbal diarrhoea seems much less threatening when you look at it in black and white, on paper! It actually looks ridiculous, they’re just letters bundled together, to make spiteful nonsense to hurt people. Wait, I hear Garok! He’s not allowed in here, he must have heard her jeering at me.

  I’m not writing now, I’m taking you with me in my thoughts. I must stop him from coming in the girl’s pit room. I’m not having him getting into trouble as well. Ha, Simone has shut up now, doesn’t want to look like a bitch in front of him. The girl is so transparent!

  ‘Are you all right?’ Garok is asking me.

  ‘I’ll be fine, don’t worry, I think I may be starting The Fever early, it has happened before’ (I hate lying to him).

  ‘Should I get Mrs Greko?’

  ‘It’s ok, I’ll come with you to find her, but I’ll speak with her alone Garok, A female must speak with another female in matters such as this. Do you understand?’ (I cannot allow him to be a part of this lie).

  ‘Yes, yes, it’s just that I was worried you know.’

  ‘No need, come.’

  I sound so calm, my insides are like jelly but no-one must see, not even Garok. Mrs Greko will be in the lounge area with Mr Prados, he is th
e teacher looking after the boys. Yes, I see her, they are both in here. They are lounging on two high backed leather chairs sipping blood from two flute glasses. This room is an oven! There is an enormously over stoked coal fire underneath a fire surround of marble gargoyles. Obviously, there are some sections of this establishment that warrant a much higher rating than just ‘two star’. The girl’s sparse, cold pit room, doesn’t really even rate that.

  ‘You must go to your pit Garok; I will see you at breakfast.’

  I can see he doesn’t want to go; I don’t want him to go, but he mustn’t be tainted with my lies. Mrs Greko has seen me and she’s coming over.

  ‘Child, I have been looking for you, what on earth happened at dinner?’

  ‘I am sorry Mrs Greko; may I speak with you in private?’

  ‘Is this a personal matter child? If it concerns any of the other children in your dormitory…’ She is bending closer to me now and whispering ‘I am referring to a certain Simone, whose unpleasant behaviour with regard to you, has not gone unnoticed by me.’

  I can’t believe it, she is daring to find fault with a ‘First Class’ student with a bloodline connected to the Elders! She continues; ‘Well, if it is something of that nature, then we better had talk in private hadn’t we?’

  I can see your face friend, in my mind’s eye and you are laughing at my bizarre, surprised expression. I am walking with the teacher I have had since my eleventh year, whom I had classed as nice, agreeable, and definitely not controversial. She has just committed an offence to one of the bylaws, written by the Elders hundreds of years ago:

  With regard to students; if a first class student requires discipline, it is to be brought before the High Council and under no circumstances to be discussed with a teacher of a lower class status.