by Rachel Lee
“Duke wants to talk it over with Ben first. I think we’re going out to see him tonight.”
Gage sighed. “Damn it. I never wanted to see anything like this ever again. We’ve got to find this bastard so I can nail his hide to a wall. And Duke gets to use the nail gun first.”
“I think he’s going to want a hammer.”
* * *
CAT WAS SHAKING so hard that she sat at the table before calling Ben. A whole bucket of horror was about to drop into the laps of these two men, Ben and Duke, and she wished she didn’t have to be part of informing them.
She glanced at the phone in her hand. She had to call Ben and try to do it without giving him reason to guess that the case had just leapfrogged past gruesome to horrific. She drew a few steadying breaths, centering herself in professional reactions, then made the call.
“Hey, Ben. Duke and I want to come to see you. Okay by you?”
“Absolutely. I took some time off, and sitting out here by myself is driving me nuts. Too much empty space to fill with sorrow and anger.”
“I hear you. Duke will share that, I think.”
“I’m sure. That’s part of the reason it’ll be good to see him. Plus, way back when, we were acquainted.”
But Duke had been too busy trying to avoid his own grief by chasing a killer to be thinking about Ben. “Thanks,” she said. “Want us to pick up some dinner?”
“If you go by Maude’s, a steak sandwich is always welcome.”
“Done.”
* * *
WHILE DUKE WENT to Maude’s to pick up dinner, Cat visited the sheriff’s office. “I’m taking two shotguns and a rifle, and some body armor,” she said to Sarah Ironheart, who was sitting at the duty desk.
Gage must have the hearing of a cat, she thought, as his head poked out his door. “Cat?”
“Coming.”
She hurried back, aware that heads were pivoting to look at her. She was past caring that she’d caused the room to seethe with curiosity. She couldn’t just take the guns without checking them out.
“You expecting trouble?” Gage asked, motioning her to close the door.
“Maybe. I don’t know. Duke is worried that Ben could be a target in this mess, too. If this guy is looking for information of some kind, eventually he’d light on Ben, wouldn’t he?”
Gage rubbed his chin and nodded. “Maybe so. You want some backup?”
“For what? A feeling? No. I want to make sure we’re armed. Just in case. That’s all. The same as going out on patrol or answering a call. Because you never know.”
“All right.” He paused. “About this report...”
“The forensics?” she interrupted. “I don’t want to hear any more today. Maybe tomorrow. Right now I’ve got to be with two grieving men, and the less I know, the better.”
“Can’t argue with that. Take the guns. Goggles, too, if you want. And plenty of ammo. Hell, just take one of the patrol vehicles.”
She thought about that. “Advertising.”
He just shook his head. “Do it your way, Cat. Your case, your decision.”
The guns would fit well enough in the back of Duke’s truck under the tonneau. Two Mossberg riot guns and a long rifle. Boxes of ammo. Clips. Three sets of night-vision goggles. Three sets of chest armor. Ready for war.
Part of her wanted to find this ridiculous, but the rest of her just couldn’t do it. Larry’s murderer was still out there, a man who would torture someone for an hour or more. Two men, she corrected herself. Duke had seen two men running from Matt’s house.
No, she wanted Ben protected even if she had to demand he come stay with her along with Duke. And if Duke decided he needed to stay with Ben, then the two of them were sure as hell going to be adequately armed.
But taking a patrol vehicle? No. Why draw attention? What if someone had Ben’s house under observation? Sure, tell ’em a cop was inside.
And Duke was right. Larry and Ben might have tried to keep their relationship on the q.t., but people still found things out. Still made connections and assumptions. Then there was the fact that Larry had shared it with her. He had just dropped it, asking her to keep it to herself. What if he’d told someone else and they’d shared it further?
God, Duke was right. Too many maybes.
Hope for the best, prepare for the worst.
* * *
SHORTLY SHE AND Duke were driving along county roads toward Ben’s house. Bags from Maude’s were tucked behind the seats. The back end was loaded, literally and figuratively.
As they started to reach quiet roads, snow began to fall, thicker than the few flakes that had fluttered down earlier.
“Great,” she said. “Weren’t there enough complications already?”
He glanced her way as he drove. “You’re loaded for bear.”
“Believe it. Fed up would be a good description. I want this case solved. I always do, but this is one that’s eating me alive.”
He didn’t answer.
What could he say? she wondered. He didn’t know what Gage had told her, which was more than enough to light her fuse. He might suspect, but he didn’t know, and she wanted to keep it that way. For now, at least. She couldn’t just drop this on Ben, either.
He spoke. “So is Cat short for something?”
She shook her head and glanced at him. “Nope. Just Cat. I asked my mom about it once, and she couldn’t explain it except that it had caught her fancy.”
“Dad?”
“He never had any input. Gone before I was born. Anyway, once I got past the teasing, I decided I like it.”
“You should. It’s unique. Like you.”
Here she was talking about her name. She kept giving herself mental kicks, trying to calm down. She shouldn’t have let the news put her into hyperdrive. But, like Gage had said, they were human and had hoped they were wrong, but she’d known. They’d known. Maybe they just hadn’t wanted to accept it.
“Listen,” he said after another mile or so, “about earlier...”
“You don’t have to say anything,” she interjected swiftly. An apology right now would kill her. There was still a glow to be had from their sex, and she wanted to hang on to it. Tightly.
“I do have to say something. You weren’t just a distraction. Not an escape. I wanted you. I’ve been wanting you ever since you confronted me in front of the department store.”
She snorted quietly. “So you like women who stand up to you?”
“I sure don’t like doormats. I don’t wilt.”
“I noticed.”
It was his turn to yield a short laugh. “Seriously, Cat, it was wonderful, and I hope we can do it again when all kinds of ugly things aren’t whipping around us. When we can just take our time and savor it.”
She liked the sound of that. She turned a little in her seat. “I’d like that, too.”
“I just wanted you to know I wasn’t using you. Every other time I wanted to have sex with you, I’ve stopped myself because I couldn’t say that with certainty. Now I can.”
She had to admit to herself that it felt better to know that. She’d told herself it didn’t matter, but it seemed it did.
“Still,” she couldn’t prevent herself from saying, “there’s no real future in it.” That was one she had to face squarely.
“Future?” He shook his head. “Lady, you’re talking to a soldier. Long-distance relationships aren’t an obstacle. Just saying.”
She hadn’t thought about that before, either. Hmm.
But as they drew closer to Ben’s house, she felt her stomach trying to knot. There was danger ahead, although she didn’t know of what kind. Emotional explosions? Ben having a breakdown? Like she could blame him if he did.
When they pulled up beside Ben’s house, he came out to greet them. Before he and Duke could do more than
shake hands, Cat opened the tailgate, ready to pass out the armament.
“Don’t say I don’t come prepared. I’ve got two riot guns, a rifle and a heavy bag of ammo. Oh, and night-vision goggles and armor. Who’s carrying what?”
Cat saw Ben stiffen. “What the hell?” he asked.
Duke spoke first. “Let’s get this gear inside. Then we’ll talk. C’mon.”
Ben didn’t argue, maybe because he heard an order as an order. Something to be said in favor of military experience, Cat thought sourly as she grabbed the two cases holding the riot guns. Ben took the rifle and the heavy ammo carrier.
“I’ll get the food and armor,” Duke said. With a gesture, he motioned Ben toward the door. “Step lively, soldier.”
That drew a half smile from Ben, who otherwise looked as if he’d been walking through the hallways of hell.
Cat followed Ben inside, hearing the sounds as Duke slammed the tailgate closed, then got the bags of food from the cab. She’d barely had time to lean the riot guns against the wall in a corner before Duke joined them, his hands full, his shoulders burdened by the heavy body armor.
Cold had entered the house through the open door, and it took several minutes before the air heated up again. Nobody shed a jacket while they put Maude’s bags in the kitchen.
Then Duke sat down to unzip carrying cases and examine the guns. “Good selection,” he said to Cat as she sat across from him on a flowery upright chair. Ben took another chair nearby.
Ben cleared his throat. “Guns?”
Duke didn’t exactly answer. “I’d prefer the rifle myself, if you two are okay with the shotguns.”
“I’m okay with anything that can cause trouble to anyone on the other end,” Cat said. “Ben?”
“Shotgun is fine with me, too.” He cleared his throat. “Why?”
Cat indicated Duke with an open hand. Let him explain this maze. She wasn’t at all sure they weren’t overreacting, and this might not be a good time to inject any doubt.
“First things,” Duke said. “Larry will be back in town tomorrow.”
Ben leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees, burying his face in his hands. “Oh God,” he whispered.
The pain in this room was palpable. Two men dealing with heart-crushing grief for which there’d never be a cure. Cat felt tears well in her own eyes and blinked them back.
A few minutes passed. Then Ben lifted his head. His face was marked by two tear streaks running from his eyes. “They didn’t let me know. Of course not. I don’t matter. It’s not like we were married.”
Duke spoke, his voice gruff. “You matter to me. And I haven’t been officially notified yet, either. Cat got the call as the lead investigator, and she told me. Now we’re telling you.”
Ben leaned back, closing his eyes. “Yeah,” he murmured. “It’s just...”
Too much, Cat thought. How many avenues were closed to Larry and Ben unless they married? She could only begin to guess at it. A million rights were defined by blood relationships and marital contracts.
Ben spoke again, his tone leaden. “Let me know what you decide about the funeral, Duke. Are you taking him back East?”
Duke cussed and rose. He looked overwhelming in the small space. “Ben, I’m not planning anything without your blessing. I may have the right, but I’m giving you the right to decide everything. I’m not taking him back East unless you want it. If you want him here, he stays here. Got it?”
Ben nodded.
Cat stared up at Duke, admiring him more in that moment than she ever had. He might be tough, even hard as nails at times, but apparently his heart was as big as everything else about him.
Ben took a few more minutes, steadying himself against the pain. Then he stirred. “Okay,” he said quietly. “What’s up other than dinner from Maude’s? As in the arsenal.”
“I could have brought more,” Cat said, trying a lighter moment. “I wasn’t sure how useful pistols would be, but I threw a few in the truck if we want them.”
“Pistols.” Ben’s eyes widened. “Are you expecting an invasion? Where are the flash-bangs? The grenades? The fifty-cal machine gun?”
She was grateful to see him rise to attempted humor. Some things you couldn’t just deal with at one time. Ben needed to shake it off for a little while. To give himself an emotional break. Well, this was certainly going to be different.
Duke leaned forward. “We can talk over dinner before it gets too cold, or we can do one or the other first. Up to you.”
“I’m curious as hell what the two of you are worried about, but let’s eat. I don’t remember...” Ben shrugged. “I think I haven’t eaten since yesterday.”
Cat felt good about being able to slip into gear. “Then let’s go, gentlemen.”
Ben had a large trestle table in his farm kitchen, and they laid out their food, along with plates, utensils and napkins. Three foam boxes yielded the steak sandwiches, another a large salad, and the final one was dessert: Maude’s peach cobbler. A feast.
It amused her a bit, too. She’d never been big on dessert, but Duke seemed to favor it.
Ben broke out some beers, and soon they were seated at one end of the table, Ben at the head, Cat and Duke on either side. They draped jackets over the backs of their chairs.
The crusty sandwich bread was still fresh, not soaked through yet from the steak juices. It smelled so good she could have slipped into a gourmet heaven.
Reality wouldn’t allow that.
Duke spoke, answering Ben’s questions that seemed to be hanging urgently. “Okay, here’s the deal.”
Ben nodded, his mouth full.
“We think Larry’s murder may be related to that story Larry wrote about the murder-for-hire scheme.”
Ben swallowed, then choked a little. He drained some beer to wash the food down, then looked at both of them. “Tell me you’re joking.” But as soon as the words tumbled out, more of them followed. Ben’s face reflected an element of shock. “Damn it, Larry.”
Duke responded. “I’ve been saying a lot of that.”
“Damn it,” Ben said again. “Damn it, Duke, that was one of the first things I thought of when I learned Larry was murdered. Damn it.”
Ben jumped up from the table, paced the length of the kitchen, then disappeared. Cat could hear his footfalls in the next rooms.
She looked at Duke. “He thought of it, too.”
Duke nodded. “Nobody wants to, but we both know certain types in uniform. We know the code.”
Ben returned with reddened eyes after a couple of minutes and sat down, starting to eat again. Cat followed suit. If this night turned long for some reason, she’d regret failing to eat even though her appetite had died.
Ben had been thinking as he absorbed the news. “I wondered. Then I wondered if any of them thought I might be a source. Like you, Duke. Then, the last day or so, I’ve been wondering if they might come after me, too. If that’s the reason. But that cat was already out of the bag!”
“I would have thought so.” Duke finished his sandwich, allowing Ben time to adjust to this.
There was more, Cat knew, but she’d let Duke explain it to Ben. He might even be able to use some shorthand that she couldn’t because she didn’t know their shared culture.
“What changed your mind?” Ben asked. He pushed his plate to one side.
“There was a break-in in town. Cat and I happened to be on the street when it occurred. The break-in involved a guy I’d already talked to about Larry. And I saw two men flee.”
Ben nodded. “And?”
“They weren’t kids, Ben. I went after them. They were trained. They were ghosts.”
Ben closed his eyes briefly, then swore. “What else?”
“The fact that he was here working on a book but hadn’t told a soul what it was about. He might have been dev
eloping that story or building a case against some others involved in that crap. And given the men I saw running, I’m not prepared to dismiss a military connection.”
Ben clearly didn’t want to be eating, but he plugged away at it. Sometimes even the best food became a mere fuel.
After a couple more mouthfuls, Ben spoke again. “That would make sense. Awful, ugly sense. Damn it, Larry.”
Duke just shook his head. “That was Larry. We both know it. I wouldn’t be surprised if there were things he couldn’t mention in his original story because he didn’t have enough corroborating evidence or testimony. It also wouldn’t surprise me if he couldn’t let those loose ends go.”
“He never would,” Ben agreed. “Never. They’d have been driving him nuts until he found answers.”
“Much as he could be a clam,” Duke replied, “he was talking to people. Maybe some dangerous people.”
“Didn’t he always do that? Way of life for him.” Ben compressed his lips, his entire face tightening. Then, “You think they might be after me.”
Cat spoke. “We can’t ignore the possibility, Ben. They might be coming for Duke, too. Whoever they are, they probably aren’t familiar with Larry’s secrecy about his work. They might think that anyone who knew him might have information.”
“But Larry kept us secret.”
“There are always people who know,” Duke said. “Always. Unless you were living in an isolated cave, someone would know you were close.”
After they put the leftovers away, they repaired to the living room with coffee. No beer. Not now, as night began to fall in slow stages. Cat looked outside and saw the snow was still falling slowly but not yet sticking. She hadn’t heard any other vehicles on the road out front, and from where she stood at the front window, she could see no signs of life.
But night approached, and the cover of darkness could bring threat.
If the break-ins were related to Larry’s murder, the perps had spaced them out a bit. It should be too soon for another attempt.