by Toni Aleo
Man… What the hell was I doing?
Exhaling hard after choking a bit more, I looked over at him and shrugged. “I have no secrets.”
He laughed out loud. “You’re a liar.”
“I am not.”
“You are,” he said simply, reaching for his pop. He took a long swig and then pointed it toward me. “You have to tell me, I told you mine.”
I set him with a look. “So no one knows that about your parents?”
He shrugged. “I mean, my whole town does, but that’s only because they talk too damn much.”
I wanted to laugh, but I didn’t. I knew all about small towns, I’d been the high topic around mine. Which was the main reason I’d wanted to leave so bad. Shrugging, I picked up a discarded crust out of the box and moved my fingers along the dry edges, pricking myself with the hard parts. “So it isn’t a secret.”
“Sure it is. I don’t tell everyone.”
I glanced over at him, and he was watching me with those deep-green eyes, a grin playing on his lips. I liked when he smiled like that. It was a little quirk that gave him a small dimple right by his lips. It was adorable and breathtaking.
Stupid dimple.
I looked away, shrugging hard as I blew out a breath. “I really don’t know what you want to know.”
“Everything,” he said without even holding back.
I looked up quickly, a tremor in my chest at the word. “Everything?”
“Everything,” he said simply. “But a deep dark secret is a good start. I mean, we got nothing but time, Bocephus, so hit me with it.”
“Can you please stop calling me that?”
He shook his head. “No way. It’s growing on me.” He flashed me a big grin, and I couldn’t help it. I smiled back. “Plus, I like the flush that fills your cheeks and the annoying little twitch you get in your nose.”
I felt the blush fill my face as I held his gaze. “You annoy me.”
He chuckled. “Ah, you like it.”
I did. A lot.
Crap.
“No, I don’t,” I said defensively.
He gave me a look that meant he didn’t believe me one bit. “Stop stalling. Tell me something, BJSJ.”
“Jesus, you and all these names for me.”
He shrugged. “You give me a lot to work with.”
My heart was pounding, and sweat was gathering at the base of my neck and along my ears. Oh my God! “I sweat behind my ears!”
One brow rose. “Huh?”
“That’s my secret. I sweat behind my ears.”
“You sweat behind your ears?”
“Yes, in gross amounts when I’m nervous.” I almost stopped sweating I was so relieved I’d come up with something—anything—that might fill the expectation between us.
He eyed me. “Are you sweating now?”
“Yes.”
“I don’t believe you.”
I leaned toward him, moving my hair. “Feel.”
He looked a little too happy about testing my secret. He leaned toward me, running his fingers along the back of my ear. His face was closer than it needed to be, but I didn’t mind. Especially when his eyes met mine. “That is disgusting.”
“I know!” I went to move away, but then his hand gathered my hair and pulled me closer.
“But having you this close, I don’t care.”
His eyes were dark and reflected my own naughty thoughts. Swallowing hard, I looked at his lips. He smelled like a dream, and this close, I could see that he hadn’t shaved. God, he was gorgeous. “I don’t hate it.”
His lips quirked as his nose moved along mine, his gaze meeting mine. “But, Bo…”
Getting lost in his eyes, I whispered, “Yeah?”
“I know damn well that the sweat behind your ears isn’t your secret. So you should just come out with the real stuff.”
He pulled back, and I glared, my heart in my throat as I gasped for breath. I was hot all over, and damn it, I wanted those lips on mine! They were so scrumptious, so thick, and ugh! “You are mean.”
He shrugged. “Some would agree, but that doesn’t matter at this moment. All that matters is your secret.”
“There is nothing to tell,” I tried again, but he was already shaking his head.
“Are you really gonna go back on your promise?”
He crossed his arms and, to my surprise, pouted. I couldn’t help myself. I giggled. He looked so pathetic, his face all scrunched up and his eyes holding mine in complete frustration. “I thought we were getting to know each other. Guess you are just using me for sex.”
There was no holding in my laughter that time. I almost fell out of my chair. I was laughing so hard as I shook my head. “I’m sorry, you got that all wrong. You’re using me.”
He feigned a pain in his heart. “Never.”
I sputtered with more laughter as I leaned back in my seat, crossing my legs as I watched him pout some more. “How do you even know I have a secret?”
“’Cause I heard you,” he shot back to me, though he wouldn’t look at me.
My brows pulled together. “Huh?”
He looked over at me then. “That night at the box, the chicks you were with, they asked you about college, and you deflected. I knew there was more there, and I want to know about it.”
My face scrunched up in disbelief. “You were listening?”
He scoffed. “Duh.” Again my heart was doing a wild jig in my chest as he held my gaze, waiting for the truth. “Why didn’t you go to college when you got that full ride?”
I felt like something was in my throat, lodged so I couldn’t speak. Nothing was working. I was almost frozen.
When he reached out, taking my hand in his, he laced our fingers together. His eyes burned into mine. “I would never tell anyone.”
I swallowed hard, gazing into his emerald depth as he whispered, “I know you’d kill me if I did.”
I smiled, laughter bubbling in my chest as I looked down at our hands. “It doesn’t matter. It’s all in the past.”
He shrugged. “Sure. But I want to know.”
“Why?”
“I think it’s gonna open up who you are.”
Glancing down at our hands, I covered them with my other and inhaled hard. Did I want him to know who I was? Why did he want to know? Why was this so damn hard? I was supposed to have wild sex and leave…yet, here I was…not wanting to leave. And seriously considering opening up to the one guy I swore I’d never get involved with.
Before I could even mutter a word, the curtain opened and a guy dressed in a Suns T-shirt and jeans came in. It was Chet McPherance, the team doctor. With his lips pursed, Chet rolled his eyes. “Really, Persson?”
Gus laughed as he let go of my hand. “What? I’m good.”
He came toward the bed, and I cleared away the pizza box, my heart still pounding in my chest. I had worked a bit with Chet—not much, but I’d seen him enough in passing to know his face.
He unwrapped Gus’s hand and examined the stitches and wounds. “You could have lost your hand.”
“I’m fine.”
“Was the dog worth it?”
He nodded proudly, and my heart may have skipped a beat. “She’s a beauty for sure.”
“Well, there is that. You know I love dogs.”
“I do too,” he said, flinching a bit while Chet put the bandages back on.
“Everything looks fine, but you can’t play tomorrow.”
Pure rage filled Gus’s features. I was so used to his playful way that his angry side scared the shit out of me. “What the hell do you mean? I’m fine! Dude, come on, I can’t sit out.”
“Persson, I can’t let this get infected being in your gloves. At least if you sit out a night, you have four days of healing.”
“I’ll get a new pair!”
“It doesn’t matter. You sweat in your gloves. That can’t sit on that wound! You need a couple nights off.”
“That’s bullshit. Wrap it with cell
ophane or something!”
But Chet was shaking his head. “Sorry, Persson. You’re sitting out tomorrow.” He tapped Gus’s knee and then reached for the chart. “You can go home as soon as the ER doctor releases ya. Have a good night.”
He left without waiting for Gus to answer, probably because it was apparent that Gus was pissed as fuck.
I walked to the bed and leaned my hip against it. “I’m sorry.”
He shrugged. “It is what it is. Just fucking sucks.”
“I know,” I agreed.
“I can’t sit out when I want to go to the Tornadoes, you know?”
“Yeah, I hear you. But they are already seeing you. You’re doing so great.”
“Yeah, but I wanted to play more. Fuck.”
I inhaled hard and really didn’t know what to say. When he reached up, taking my hand with his good one, I met his gaze as he shrugged. “Oh well, at least I got to be with you.”
That stupid heart of mine skipped a stupid beat once more. “I’m sure you’d rather play than hang with me.”
“I want both,” he said, and then he kissed the side of my hand. “I’m ready to get out of here.”
“Me too.”
He glanced up at me and smiled, but that wasn’t what had me gasping for breath. No, it was the pure unadulterated lust in his eyes that consumed me from the top of my head to the bottom of my feet. How he could go from upset to horny in two seconds was beyond me, but then…I was feeling the exact same thing. I wanted him, desperately.
Pursing his lips up at me, he blew me a kiss before he said, “Don’t worry. We’ll be naked soon enough.”
That should have pleased me. It should have gotten my engines burning, but it didn’t.
It saddened me.
Because that meant this would be over soon.
Oh, I was in so much trouble.
Chapter Eighteen
Gus
“Man, it’s going to be a boring game tomorrow.”
I glanced over at Bo. The windows of her Jeep were down. The breeze blew her hair everywhere. I expected her to pull those red locks up, but she didn’t. She drove, oblivious to the strands tangling against her face. She looked like one of the babes I liked checking out. She wasn’t tanned like typical eye candy on the beach. I was pretty sure she’d turn into a lobster if she went outside. Her cheeks were red from the fresh air, but then they had been like that all night.
And what a night. I thought it was going to be awful. Sitting in an ER was never the best time, but being there with her was. I loved listening to her laugh. I was bummed that I wasn’t going to play tomorrow, but the more I thought about it, the more I knew the doctor was right. I was just glad the dog, Sweetie, was okay. In the time it took me to get out of the ER, Maxy had named her and taken her to the vet. I was kind of pissed I didn’t get to name her, but at the same time, I would have named her something worse than he had.
Either way, the night wasn’t a total loss, and it wasn’t even over yet.
“Yeah, it sucks, but I don’t want to lose my hand,” I said with a small laugh.
She smiled over at me, nodding. “Yeah, that would suck.”
“Exactly. How could I grab your ass or tits with only one hand?”
Rolling her eyes, she looked back at the road. “No one said you’re touching either my ass or my tits.”
I scoffed. “You wouldn’t stop me. Especially if I went after those naughty bits with my mouth.”
She squirmed in her seat, and I fought back my laughter.
“Now, you never said mouth. You said hands.” She smiled as she glanced back at the road. “So, Sweetie?”
I exhaled hard. “Apparently. I would have called her Smooches or something, so it’s good he named her.”
She giggled. “Really? I thought you’d name her Puck or something hockey-ish.”
I shook my head. “No way. She’s too pretty. You’ll have to come over and meet her. You didn’t get a good look at her, and Max gave her a bath, apparently.”
She inhaled sharply as she turned. “He’s been busy.”
“Yep. He has time. He isn’t getting laid right now.”
Her faced scrunched up as she laughed. “How do you know that? Wait, you guys admit that to each other?”
I scoffed and waved her off. “No, but his girlfriend is back home. She’s waiting to see where he gets called up. There is talk he’ll get traded soon, so they’re waiting, and since he isn’t the cheating type, he isn’t having sex, except of the phone variety. FYI, she’s loud.”
I expected her to laugh—I mean, that was funny—but she didn’t. “Do you expect him to cheat?”
Of course that was what she heard out of that whole thing. “No, I’m just pointing out why he isn’t getting laid.”
“Oh.”
“He loves the girl, a lot, and it’s cute, I guess.”
“You guess,” she commented, very sassy-like.
I eyed her. “You’re setting me up for failure here, Bocephus.”
She scoffed. “You’re the one talking.”
I glared at her. “You’re trying to use my words against me so you can figure a way out of this.”
She stopped the car. “Out of this?” She scowled at me.
We were parked outside her apartment.
“Yes, this.” I said. “Don’t ask me what this, but this.”
She rolled her eyes. “That makes a lot of sense.”
I stayed in the car a few seconds longer so I could watch her get out and check out her ass. Then I followed close behind. As she led the way up the stairs, neither of us said anything. I wasn’t sure if it was because we both were anticipating what was about to happen in her room or if she was still pissed. Either way, I was on edge, and my cock was hard as fuck. Especially after the show she made of jiggling her ass as she climbed an endless number of stairs.
Finally we reached the door, and she fished for her keys. “Lizzy isn’t home.”
I came up behind her, wrapping my arms around her waist and nuzzling my nose in her hair. “Good. Means you can scream as loud as you want.”
She didn’t acknowledge me, just opened the door and went inside. Before I could make it in, she stopped and looked at me. She blocked my entry by leaning her hip against the doorframe.
She wasn’t going to let me in!
“Really?”
“Gus—”
“You aren’t going to let me in because of that comment?”
Holding my gaze, she slowly shook her head. “Actually, no, that’s not it.” I drank in her face, the uncertainty in her eyes and flush that began at her neck, running down her chest. “Listen, it’s actually more.”
I waited as she just stood there staring me down. “And that is?”
She exhaled hard, her face filling with flush as she shook her head. “This is so stupid—”
“It’s not stupid if you feel it. Just tell me, what’s wrong? I thought we were banging.”
She held her hand up to me and nodded. “That. That’s all you want, and somehow, I’ve, sorta, kinda, well… I started… Fucking hell, I kinda don’t hate you anymore.”
I curved my lips in a knowing smile as she let out a long, frustrated breath.
“And if I let you in and take you to bed and do all the naughty shit I dream of doing with you, I don’t think I would be able to handle you ignoring me and blowing me off, like I know you will once you get what you want. What I want too. I’ve been really hurt, Gus, like bone-deep hurt, and I feel like you could do that to me. And I know I’m being pathetic, but honestly, I can’t. You’re too much of a distraction. At least this way, you walking one way, me walking the other way, there are no hard feelings.”
There was so much to say. It was all there, but I was wrung tight, and all I could do was stare at her.
“See? Now I’ve freaked you out. Go on, run away, Gus the Bus. I’m sure you won’t go to bed alone. Thanks for a great night. Hope your hand gets better.”
She t
ried to shut the door, but I reached out and stopped her. She looked from the door back to me. “First, I don’t want anyone else in my bed but you.” Pushing the door open, I went toe-to-toe with her, capturing her sweet face in my good hand. I ran my thumb along her lip, lost in those blue eyes that rattled me so deeply. “Second, who said anything about blowing you off or ignoring you?”
She was breathless, her pupils dilating as she gasped for breath. “Everyone knows that Gus the Bus hits and runs.”
“Maybe because I haven’t met anyone to station up at,” I said softly. When her lips curved, I chuckled. “Damn, that was corny.”
“So damn corny.” She laughed.
I inhaled hard, wrapping my bad arm around her and bringing her in closer. “But really, Bo, I didn’t intend on not seeing you after tonight.”
She didn’t believe me. I could see it in her eyes. Hell, I almost couldn’t believe I said it myself, but I meant it.
“I’ve been told that before.”
Moving my hand into her hair, I ran my thumb along her eyebrow and smiled down at her. “But you haven’t met someone like me.”
She laughed slightly. “He was everything like you, only you’re hotter.”
“Well, at least I have that.” I grinned. “I think you should just let it happen. We can think about the other stuff later.”
She bit her lip, and a breath rushed out of her as she slowly shook her head. “I can’t do that. Just in the time I’ve known you and sorta not hated you, I’ve been distracted with thoughts of getting you naked. If I do take you to my bedroom and let it happen, then that’s it, I’m gonna be crushed. I can’t be that girl again, Gus. I was pathetic. I mean, you don’t even know. I was…” She struggled with the words. “I made a bad decision, and I can’t let it happen again. I know the warning signs, and you are one huge warning sign.”
No one had ever called me that before. I have been called a lot, but never a warning sign. I understood what she was saying. She’d been hurt before. I got it. She was obviously still bitter. But it was time to get it on with someone else and fucking enjoy it. But that wasn’t the way Bo thought. She saw long term, she saw forever, the future, while I was living for the now. Clearing my throat, I nodded. “I completely respect what you’re saying, but I really want you.”