by Edith DuBois
“It is. When can I expect you?”
“All my belongings are packed, and apart from a few last-minute errands, I’m ready to go.” She hugged Roy and put her cheek on his head as she thought about having to say good-bye to her aunt, to Michelle, and—goddamn it—to the Greenwoods. She sat up, determined to keep the men out of mind until the last possible second. As for Michelle and Aunt Agnes, she had decided not to deal with that. She’d just take the compound and go. After hugging her sister and seeing how happy she was with her fiancés at the show last night, Marina had chickened out. There was no way on earth she could face Michelle and tell her what she was about to do.
Michelle would cling to her. She would demand that she stay. She would pester and prod until she had warped Marina into thinking she should remain bonded to this place. Marina couldn’t take that chance. She’d made her decision. No one would have the opportunity to change it.
So she’d waited until Aunt Agnes had fallen asleep, and then she’d spent the rest of the night packing. All of her belongings were in the Escalade, unbeknownst to Aunt Agnes. She’d written a letter, explaining everything, advising her aunt to ask Michelle about the parts she didn’t understand, and now placed the thick envelope on her pillow.
“Bo,” she said. “I’ll be there in half an hour.”
* * * *
Johnny stopped in his tracks, turned, and faced his brother. “Damn it, Jeremiah, watch where you’re walking.” His brother had caught his heel for about the fifth time.
“You watch where you’re walking.” Jeremiah skulked past him and rammed him with his shoulder.
Johnny swung his fist out but missed hitting his brother. “Quit feeling sorry for yourself. You’re not the only one who’s pissed off today. We all have enough shit going on without you adding to the pile.” Jeremiah grumbled an inaudible response.
They’d decided to walk over to Bo’s from the center, knowing they’d most likely want to shift after Marina drank the compound. Running in bear form was the best way to work off steam. And Marina taking the compound was sure as hell gonna cause steam.
Damn. The fact was, he’d tried to stop thinking of Marina in “if” terms. She’d made her decision, and she’d made it loud and clear. She wasn’t going to change her mind. She belonged on the stage. She wanted that more than she wanted love. It was the bald truth of the matter. But Johnny guessed some part of himself hadn’t given up, had refused to let go of hope. His heart could be a dumbass like that. Plus, walking through the woods on his way to the Greenwoods’ Last Stand, as it were, didn’t seem like the best time to try and deny the fact that his mate was leaving him. She was actually choosing to leave him.
They’d crossed Savage Creek and Savage Road and were traipsing through one last thicket before they reached the Shoshone lands. Jeremiah had been muttering and stepping on Johnny’s heels the whole way, though, and Johnny felt like his bear could explode out of him at the slightest provocation. He hoped Marina wasn’t around when it happened.
Without warning, Jeremiah stopped in front of him, causing Johnny to run smack into him.
“What the hell, man?”
Jeremiah turned around and shoved him hard. “This is all your fault, you prick.”
Johnny swatted his brother’s hands away as he stumbled backward. “You think that if there was anything I could have done to keep her here, I wouldn’t have done it?”
“Why the hell did you stay in bear form?” Jeremiah came at him. “You knew she was in there. You knew there was a chance she’d come outside. You should have stayed far away from her.” Jeremiah went in to tackle him, but Johnny dodged. They grappled with each other as Jeremiah slung questions at him. “If you hadn’t mated her, she wouldn’t feel the need to leave. If you’d have kept your dick in your pants for one goddamn second, we wouldn’t be in this predicament.”
Usually at this point, James would jump between them and break them apart, but Johnny saw his older brother out of the corner of his eye. He looked at them, shook his head, and kept on walking.
While his attention was diverted, Jeremiah cuffed him on the chin.
“Get off me,” Johnny roared, shoving at Jeremiah and causing him to fall back a bit. He rubbed his chin and glared at his brother, who was panting and glaring at him as well. “Why do you care? You’re not even mated to her.”
He had less than a second to react before Jeremiah barreled into him full force. Johnny flew back and fell onto the ground, his breath knocked out of his lungs for a moment. As soon as he sucked in a fresh burst of oxygen, though, he was fighting. He and Jeremiah swung at each other, and Johnny didn’t concern himself with holding back. Jeremiah sure as hell didn’t either.
He caught a punch to his ribs while delivering a few solid blows to Jeremiah’s stomach. “You bastard!” Jeremiah kept shouting at him as they struggled against one another. Johnny felt his muscles vibrating, and he bit back the impulse to shift. He could never lose control of his bear, especially not while grappling with his brother, but he certainly wanted to.
Jeremiah roared when Johnny got in a good elbow to the back. He felt Jeremiah’s body begin the telltale shake. He was pinned under his brother, though, and couldn’t wriggle away. Jeremiah’s black eyes were full of wild fury and the struggle not to shift. He had his arm across Johnny’s throat, pressing harder as his control slipped further away.
“Damn it, Jeremiah, get ahold of yourself,” James yelled, coming up from behind and grabbing Jeremiah’s shirt. He ripped him off Johnny and slung him away. Johnny choked as his throat was freed, and James offered his hand, helping him up from the ground.
He turned to Jeremiah to give him shit for what had almost happened, but Jeremiah was sprawled out on his back and looking up at the trees.
“What the hell are you doing?” Johnny asked.
Jeremiah didn’t answer.
“Come on,” James said, thrusting his hand in Jeremiah’s face. “If we don’t hurry, Marina’s gonna beat us there and take the compound before we have a chance to see her. I don’t know how fast that shit is gonna work, so we need to get going.”
Jeremiah swatted at James’s hand.
“Man, quit. We’re not leaving you.”
“Go on, damn it. Just leave me here and go on.”
“Get your ass up,” Johnny said, brushing leaves and dirt off his own ass. “If you think we’re leaving you here, you’re one dumb son of a bitch.”
Jeremiah shook his head. “I can’t face her. There’s no telling what I’d do.”
“What? You mean like cry like the little baby you’re being right now?”
Jeremiah flipped him off.
“You know that’s just your ego talking. And, come on, we’re your brothers. We wouldn’t laugh if you had to set loose a few tears. Men gotta cry, too, sometimes. Ain’t no shame in that, brother.”
“Why don’t you take your ‘brother’ and shove it up your ass? I said leave me alone.”
“James, this is a rare display. We need to really look our fill. This is Jeremiah Greenwood circa ’95.”
“I know exactly what you’re talking about. When Jill Sherman wouldn’t let him take her to the Honey Harvest Hoedown?”
“That’s exactly what this reminds me of.”
Jeremiah glared over at them. “How can you bastards joke about this? She’s supposed to be your mate, and you don’t even care.”
Johnny felt his grin melt and dissolve and then droop into a frown. “That’s not true, and you know it.”
“Then why don’t you two frolic along and leave me to my moroseness, as you so call it. I’m sorry I can’t joke about this. I’m sorry I don’t want one last good-bye. She’s not even my mate. At least you two got to have her for a little bit. She’s not mine. I don’t have a place there. So just go the fuck on.” He turned his face away from them. “I need to be alone.”
Johnny’s initial response was to nudge his brother none too gently
with the toe of his boot and call him a pussy and generally goad him into an angry, manly response. But, well, looking at his brother all pathetic and sad on the ground, he just couldn’t bring himself to do it.
“Look,” Johnny said, “this isn’t going to be easy. Not for me, not for James, and not for you.” He looked at his older brother and then back at Jeremiah. “And I don’t know about you two jerks, but as much as I’m not looking forward to this encounter, I sure as hell don’t want to do it without the both of you standing right there with me.”
“Besides,” James said, “even if Marina isn’t your mate, you belong there.”
“No I don’t.” Jeremiah clenched his eyes closed.
“Yes, you do. You belong there because you’re our brother and you belong with us.”
Jeremiah sucked in a deep breath and after a moment or two opened his eyes again. Johnny offered his hand at the same time James did. Jeremiah took their hands, and they heaved him up together.
After he had brushed himself off, Johnny asked, “Now that we’ve made it through your emo fest, can we be on our merry way?”
“Yeah, I guess so.”
They began walking toward Bo’s house again.
“Hey, Johnny?” Jeremiah asked a few moments later.
“Yeah?”
“What’s an emo fest?”
Chapter Sixteen
Marina blew on the steaming cup of tea Bo had given her. She took a sip and closed her eyes, wondering how he managed to make such a perfect cup. It tasted like rose blossoms and lavender and honey but with just a hint of spice. Maybe nutmeg? Male voices stretched across the yard and fell into her ears, causing her eyes to snap open.
Three beautiful men walked toward the porch, shoving and joking with each other.
“I don’t have middle child syndrome,” Jeremiah said, shoving Johnny.
“Okay, okay, maybe you don’t, but then how do you explain your propensity for long, brooding walks by the lakeshore?”
“Have you noticed he likes them even more when it’s foggy?” James asked.
“Ass-hats. The both of you.” Jeremiah shoved away from his brothers, his graceful, muscled form striding out in front of them. Finally, he looked up at the porch and noticed her watching. He froze, looking deep into her eyes. She saw everything there. Every hurt, every anger, every fury, every despair, yet he was still there looking at her. Still there hoping for her to change her mind.
She looked down at her tea and blew, needing a moment to compose her thoughts. Jeremiah’s gaze had sent them tumbling around in her brain. It wasn’t until he stomped up the porch that she realized he was coming after her. She only had time to gasp before he ripped the cup out of her hands and threw it across the yard.
“Hey!”
“You weren’t even gonna wait for us to get here? You weren’t gonna say good-bye? You are cold, Marina. A cold and heartless woman!”
“Jeremiah, it wasn’t—”
“We love you, goddamn it.” He grabbed her shoulders and shook her, yanking her off Bo’s bench. “Why don’t you feel it? Why don’t you want it?”
“Jeremiah Greenwood!” Bo spoke harshly from the doorway, his raspy voice cutting through the air. “Get your hands off her.” Jeremiah stopped shaking her but didn’t let her go. “You’re acting a damn fool, boy.”
James and Johnny had reached the porch. “What is it? What’s going on?”
Jeremiah released her and turned away, throwing his hands up. “We’re too late. She already drank the compound.” His voice was tight and gruff.
“What?” Johnny asked, blinking and then turning to look at Marina. “What do you mean?”
“I mean she drank the fucking compound. She’s outta here. No more Marina. The end. Good-bye.”
Marina rolled her eyes. “If you would have asked me, Jeremiah Greenwood, instead of storming up here like the ursine creature that you are, you would have known I was drinking tea.”
He looked out to her forlorn mug, overturned and nestled into the grass, and then looked back at her. “That was tea?”
She ran her hand through her hair and nodded, surprised that her hands were shaking so bad. “And it was very delicious tea at that.”
“Whoops.” She saw a bit of rosiness appear through his beard.
Offering him a small smile, she shrugged. “It’s okay. It’s…” She looked at all three of them. Their faces were drawn, and she could see they were hanging on to every word. How was she ever going to do this with them here? “It’s understandable,” she whispered.
“On that note,” Bo said in a far-too-cheery voice, “shall we get started? No point in loitering about on my porch.”
“Bo,” James said, not looking away from Marina, “may we have a few minutes alone with our mate?”
Marina felt her heart twist at the term, but Bo nodded. “Mind you, I’ll be watching from that window.” He pointed to one a little ways down the porch. “If she shows even the smallest sign of distress, I’m coming out and we’re going ahead. Got it?”
James offered a terse nod, and then Bo went inside, the screen door slamming behind him. After he had closed the front door, James took her hand and led her to the steps. “Stand here, please,” he said, indicating the bottom step. After she had done so, the three men stood in the yard in front of her—James on the left, Jeremiah in the middle, and Johnny on the right.
“We’ve each thought long and hard about what we wanted to say to you this morning,” James said. “At first, I said we should make a flow chart and present you with all kinds of graphs and statistics about why it would be better for you to stay with us.”
“Then I thought we should just kidnap you again,” Jeremiah said, and she was surprised to see him grinning. “But we all know how wonderfully that has turned out.”
“And I thought it would be a good idea to kidnap Bo,” Johnny said. “I figured if we could find this compound he’s brewing and throw it in the lake, that would put an end to all this nonsense. But then we realized that wouldn’t work ’cause we all know Bo would just use his Shoshone hoodoo to kick our asses.”
Marina laughed but then covered her mouth, afraid she would offend them. Jeremiah stepped forward and pulled her hand away.
“Don’t be afraid of your own laughter.” His hands, so rough and powerful before, were tender and caring. He brushed a strand of hair off her cheek. “Marina, don’t ever be afraid of that. We saw how upset you were when you mated with first Johnny and then James. We would never intentionally hurt you, but we’d gotten a taste of what it could be like to spend our lives with you. And honestly, the thought of losing you is always gonna make my gut twist with pain. You’re not something we can easily let go of. But we saw you last night. Onstage, Marina, you are the most magnificent creature I and my brothers have ever seen. It’s obvious you belong there, and we sorta realized that we can’t force you away from something that is such a part of you, a part of what makes you so beautiful.”
He leaned down and brushed a soft kiss on her lips and then kissed her eyes, kissed away the moisture there. “So really there was only one thing to say to you, only one thing that means anything.”
She quickly wiped at her eyes. “What’s that?”
“You don’t know?” he asked, a gleam in his dark eyes.
She shook her head.
He leaned in, pressing his cheek to hers so that his lips brushed against her ear. “I love you, Marina.”
When he stepped back, Johnny pressed closed to her other ear. “I love you.” Then he kissed her sweet and slow. She relished his flavor, his movement, his breath, and then he was gone. James approached but stopped in front of her, blocking her view of the other two. He held her face in his hands and mouthed those same three words.
Then he kissed her. Where Johnny’s kiss was slow and warm and welcoming, his was desperate and demanding. He sucked her tongue into his mouth and rolled his around it. He held her face tig
ht between his palms and pulled raw, tumultuous emotion out of her. She breathed in deep, and the wanting washed through her body. Everything she’d been trying to hold back was released, and she felt herself flailing helplessly in his wild, stormy kiss.
She broke away, gasping, and fled. She ripped open the screen door and then tumbled into Bo’s house. “Bo!” she cried out. “Bo, I need the compound! Give me the compound.”
“Marina, are you okay?”
“Yes,” she said, her voice breaking. “I just…I need it right now. I can’t wait any longer.”
“Marina, hold on. I think you should—”
“Give me the compound!” she screamed, jutting her hand out to him, palm up.
Bo stared at her for a long moment and then nodded. He retreated into his kitchen for a moment and then returned. Marina had left her hand out, and in it he placed a small glass vial. It was a lot smaller than she thought it would be. The liquid inside was clear. It sparkled as the morning light danced across it from the window.
“This is it?”
Bo nodded.
“How long will I have before…”
“About an hour.”
She heard a commotion out on the porch. “Fuck this! I’m not waiting out here!” Then the front door was ripped open. Jeremiah burst through, followed closely by his brothers. They all three began shouting, begging her to wait a day or two or to give them one more chance or to just hold on one goddamn minute.
“Quiet!” Bo roared over their clamoring voices. “You three sound like a pack of rabid coyotes.” They all three looked at Bo with mouths open in mid yell. Slowly, their mouths closed and they nodded.
“Sorry, Bo,” James muttered.
“Now I told you from the beginning that this was gonna be Marina’s choice. I gave you two weeks with her. If she hasn’t changed her mind by now, then it is her prerogative to take the compound. She knows exactly what she’ll be leaving behind if she drinks it, and she knows exactly what she stands to gain by staying.” Marina thought that statement sounded a little loaded, but she let it go when Bo nodded at her. “Go ahead, Marina.”