He printed out some pictures for the grant application, stuffed them into a manila folder, then went downstairs. Bree had her arm around Lauri. His gaze went to the baby in the carrier. Samson lay beside Olivia.
Lauri lifted her head. “I need Anu.” She rubbed the back of her hand over her eyes.
“I called her,” Bree said. “I told her not to come, but she insisted she’d be right over. She loves you very much.”
“Let me wash my face before she gets here.” Lauri brushed past Kade on her way to the kitchen.
“I don’t know how to help her,” he muttered, moving closer to his wife.
Bree’s eyes softened. “No one does. But hold her when she needs you to, Kade. Let her know you’re hurting for her.”
“I’m mad at her too,” he admitted. “She’s brought danger to our doorstep, Bree.”
Her head was down, and her gaze stayed on the baby. “So many problems right now,” she murmured. “Victor’s problems, Florence’s and Pia’s deaths, the baby. Now this with Lauri and Davy.”
He was going to have to explain the situation to Dave, something he didn’t want to do. Living in fear wasn’t good for any of them, but until this guy was caught, that was exactly what they’d have to do.
Olivia cried until Bree popped the warmed bottle into her mouth. She struggled to maintain her own composure. She was shell-shocked. Davy was the important thing right now. She had to keep him safe. Safe from danger, safe from emotional harm too.
She turned her head and stared at Kade’s strong jawline as he sat on the sofa. Was their marriage even legal now? She’d have to consult a lawyer. It was hard not to blurt out that Rob was alive. That the body they’d brought home to rest in the cemetery was someone else.
Who? Rob had refused to tell her. She sensed he was involved in something bad. Why else be so secretive? If only she could talk to Anu about it—but that was impossible until she talked with Kade. She had to tell her husband first.
Olivia had finally fallen asleep. Bree put the baby in the portable crib. The doorbell rang, then Anu came in through the doorway. She had her hands full of pots and bowls on a tray. Bree took the items from Anu. Davy ran to his grandmother and allowed her to pull him into her lap. The bond they shared only seemed to grow with the years.
“You have grown since I saw you last,” Anu said, hugging the boy. She held out her hand to Lauri. “Kulta, I am so sorry for your loss today.”
Lauri’s tears were already flowing, so Bree left Lauri to Anu’s ministration and carried the food to the kitchen.
Pain began to pulse behind Bree’s temples. This night would be one long nightmare of regrets. If only there had been time to tell Kade about Rob before Anu arrived. She couldn’t spring the news on him here in front of Rob’s mother.
Bree was certain that Rob had been in touch with his mother, however. It would explain Anu’s distress the other day. Anu had to have as many questions as Bree. Where had he been all this time? How was he earning a living? He would have to be using a fake Social Security number. Which led to Bree’s next assumption that whatever he was doing wasn’t exactly legal. Anu probably knew everything. She and Rob had been so close.
Her gaze fell on her husband as he filed in with the rest for supper. Her heart cramped. Rob was going to change everything. There would be custody issues, even marriage issues, to work out. Davy was going to be torn between two fathers.
The disruption of her life loomed like a nightmare she’d never awaken from. Would Rob’s family pressure her to leave Kade and go back to him? Would her own heart do the same?
She couldn’t deny his presence had stirred old feelings. Just today she’d told Davy it was okay to love two fathers. But it wasn’t okay for her to love two husbands. She’d have to choose between her first love and the man who now shared her life. The more contact she had with Rob, the more likely it would be that the love she felt for him would grow stronger. She’d loved him once with her whole being, and his death had nearly destroyed her.
She didn’t know how she was supposed to feel about all this or how to find her way to happiness again.
“Bree, you okay?” Kade carried Olivia in his arms. The baby was awake and sucking on her fingers.
“I-I’m fine.” She avoided his gaze and stared into the baby’s face. “She shouldn’t be hungry since she just ate.”
“I don’t think she is. I changed her, but she seems to want to look around. Don’t you, baby girl?” He jostled the infant and she stared up at him as though memorizing his face.
Watching him with Olivia, Bree hoped he was beginning to love the baby, but maybe Kade was just being Kade. He didn’t have a mean bone in his body. Kade reached out to every hurt human or animal he met. Quiet and strong, he had been there for her through every trauma.
How was she going to administer such a killing blow to him? And to herself?
The room seemed impossibly close and hot. Bree fanned her face. “I have to step outside a minute.” She escaped the stares and rushed for the back deck. Kade called after her, but she waved her hand. “I’m okay. Just hot. I’ll be right back.”
When she stepped onto the deck, the air cooled her hot cheeks, and her panic receded. She hadn’t even asked God for help, and that should have been the first thing she did. The stars twinkled in the night sky as she prayed for guidance, for strength to face the coming hours and days. Anu said God heard every heart’s cry. Bree could only trust he would answer in the best way.
Her gaze fell on a line of shrubs. The security light illuminated a flock of cardinals sleeping in the branches. Cardinals were said to mate for life. Was that what God would want? For her to go back to Rob? Her throat closed at the thought.
Through the big windows, she could see her family talking in the dining room. Kade kept glancing at the door as he watched for her. She should go back in. He’d come looking for her soon if she didn’t, and the more upset she seemed, the more he would press her for an answer she wasn’t ready to give.
She turned toward the door when she saw a shadow move. “Who’s there?” she called in a soft voice. But she knew. It could only be one person. “Rob, is that you?”
The shadow moved again, and his face came into view in the security light. “Yeah, it’s me.”
Hugging herself for warmth, she moved down the first step. “What are you doing here? Spying on us?”
“I wanted to catch a glimpse of my son. Is that so wrong?”
This was all his choice, not hers. “The son you walked away from without a backward glance?”
He moved closer. “You’re bitter, Bree.”
The regret in her throat nearly made speech impossible. “I’m not. I’m just trying to understand what you’ve done. And why.” Part of her wanted to leap into his arms and part of her wanted to shake him.
Yet the man she loved was in the kitchen behind her. Wasn’t he?
Rob moved closer until he was at the bottom of the three steps. Bree was on the first one and nearly eye level with him. Their gazes met. Before she realized it, she’d reached out and cupped his cheek in her palm. “I can’t believe you’re alive.”
“Are you glad, Bree?” he whispered.
“Yes.” The word was the barest breath.
He leaned forward and his lips brushed hers. The smell of his breath was so familiar, yet half forgotten. The rough texture of the stubble on his cheek reminded her of the first time they’d kissed. Eons ago. She closed her eyes and remembered.
She was married to another man. The thought made her step away. “I can’t,” she whispered.
Rob backed away too. “I still love you, Bree,” he said, his voice hoarse. He turned and fled.
She stared at his retreating back. God help her, she still loved him too.
20
ALL THROUGH DINNER KADE KEPT GLANCING AT BREE. There was something different about her tonight. She seemed almost feverish in her attempts to cover it up. He saw the desperation lurking in her eyes. At first
he thought it might be the threat from Wes’s killer, but he’d never seen his fearless wife back down from anything.
This was different.
Maybe she was beginning to realize she would lose Olivia. He jostled the baby on his knees. Cute little thing. He could learn to love her too, but he sensed they couldn’t keep her. Now that the grant was a sure thing, they could probably afford it, but he thought Mason would likely track down the parents.
His gaze lingered on Anu. She’d been uncharacteristically quiet tonight, reflective. Had she and Bree had a falling out? He couldn’t imagine that. They were as tight as bark on a tree. When she left tonight, he’d have to find out what was up.
His gaze lingered on his wife’s face. She’d be thrilled to hear the news about the cougars. One of the great things about Bree was her empathy.
It was nearly ten by the time Anu left. He carried his sleeping son up to bed while Bree put the baby down. Lauri lagged last up the steps, and he saw tears on her cheeks again. The right words never found their way to his tongue. He could only guess at Lauri’s pain by imagining how he’d feel if he ever lost Bree.
After tugging off Dave’s shoes, he stripped him of his jeans and left him to sleep in his T-shirt. With the blankets tucked under his chin, Dave slept soundly, and Kade studied him in the moonlight. He and Bree longed for a child they’d made together, but he doubted he could love any other boy or girl more than he loved this son. Dave had quickly become the child of his heart. He looked so much like Bree, but Kade found the boy imitating him in the foods he liked, the way he wanted his hair cut, so many things.
God was good to give him such a wonderful family. He’d lay down his life to preserve it.
Leaving the boy’s bedroom, he stopped to check on Lauri and found her already in her pajamas with Zorro curled on the bed beside her. She held a Bible in her hand. Not what he expected to see. She usually kicked at being urged to go to church with them.
“You okay?” he asked.
She glanced up. “I don’t know if Wes is in heaven, Kade.” Her face crumpled. “I never even talked to him about God.”
He stepped into the room and wished Bree were here to answer her questions. Or Anu. “I’m sorry, honey. I’ll pray for you to come to terms with all this.”
She hugged herself. “I’m scared, Kade. What if that guy comes here and hurts Bree or Davy? I’d never forgive myself.”
He sat on the edge of the bed and put his arm around her. “Can you remember anything else that might help us figure out who he is?”
She pillowed her head on his shoulder. “I’ve thought all evening. There’s just nothing beyond what I told you.”
“Mason never called. He was supposed to call after he talked to your boss.”
“They’re being blackmailed or something. I bet she won’t say a word.”
Maybe the woman could be legally compelled. He patted her hand. “Mason will figure it out. I want us all to be extra careful, but we’ll be all right.”
“What about the money?” she asked in a small voice. “If we give back the money, maybe he’ll go away.”
“You know what he wants. Giving you that money was nothing but a setup. The guy is after Dave.”
Lauri sniffled and scrubbed at her face like a child. “It’s all my fault. I’ll try not to be so stupid.”
He dropped a kiss on her head. “Love you, kid.”
“Love you too.”
He let her go, then rose. “Get some sleep. If you need me tonight, just call for me.”
Her smile was strained, but the tears had dried. “I will. Thanks, big brother. For everything. I don’t know what I would have done today if you hadn’t been there. I’d probably be dead right now.”
He didn’t feel like a white knight, not with a family grieving their son tonight. Closing her door behind him, he went down the hall to the master bedroom. Jenna’s door was closed. She’d been missing all evening. Not that she had to answer to them.
He paused in the hall and called Mason at home. The sheriff answered after two rings. “Hey, I’m sorry we missed Zoe’s party.”
“You had a good excuse.”
“Any news from Mrs. Saunders?”
“She claims Bill Jones is his real name. That he’s just a client and she knows nothing.” Fatigue roughened Mason’s voice. “She was nervous though. I thought she was going to cry once or twice.”
“Can’t you get her to break down and tell the truth?”
“Maybe. I’ll have another go at her tomorrow. How’s Lauri?”
“Devastated. And subdued. I’ll let you get to bed. It’s nearly midnight. Let me know what you find out.”
He put his phone away and pushed open his bedroom door. Bree rocked and sang softly to Olivia in the chair by the window. Already in her nightgown, she smiled when she saw him, but Kade didn’t think she was glad to see him. Shucking his jeans, he pulled on pajama bottoms and a T-shirt, then climbed in bed. Crossing his arms behind his head, he waited for her to get the baby to sleep. He wasn’t going to be able to drop off himself until he knew what was bugging her.
“I found pictures of the kittens on my camera,” he said.
“Uh-huh,” Bree said, gazing into the baby’s face.
She hadn’t paid any attention to what he said. He thought about repeating it but shut up until she told him what was on her mind. He watched her rise and place Olivia in the bassinet. She brushed a kiss across Olivia’s fine hair and stepped away. Was it his imagination or was that reluctance he saw as she turned toward the bed?
He patted the space beside him. “We need to talk. Something is bothering you.”
“You shouldn’t have to ask with the traumatic day we’ve had.”
“The Bree I know rolls with the punches. We’re all hurting for Lauri, but I know you. There’s something more than that, Green Eyes.”
The corners of her mouth lifted. “You haven’t called me Green Eyes in forever.”
He needed to do better at letting her know how much he loved her. “I’m sorry, babe. There’s been a lot going on.”
“A lot you’re not sharing.”
“Yeah, that too.” If he expected her to open up, he needed to come clean himself. “I think I’m going to get a pink slip soon.”
Her eyes widened, and her hand went to her mouth. “Oh, Kade.”
“It will be okay,” he rushed on. “I’m applying for a grant and I think I’ll get it. If not, I’ll find a job. I don’t want our boy to have to change schools.”
“There’s not much here. Maybe when the new mine opens.”
“You know how I feel about that,” he said before he could help himself. “The mine would ruin the land.”
She squeezed his hand. “I didn’t mean I thought you should go to work there. I thought maybe it would bring new business to the area. You’ll get unemployment for a while. We’ll make out.” Her gaze filled with love. “You’re a good man, Kade Matthews. You’ve always taken care of us.”
There seemed to be a hidden meaning in her words that he couldn’t decipher. “I always will,” he said. “Whatever’s wrong right now, I want to be there for you. You can tell me, Bree.”
Her eyes filled with tears. “It’s good and bad at the same time, Kade. I don’t know what to think.”
“It can’t be that bad.” He pulled her close. Her breathing was ragged. “Babe, what’s wrong?”
She pulled away and searched his eyes. Tears hung on her lashes, and her mouth trembled. “Don’t leave me, Kade. No matter what I tell you, don’t leave me.”
A sliver of fear drove itself into his heart. What could she tell him that would be so earth-shattering? “I’d never leave you, Bree.”
He tried to pull her tight, but she put her palm against his chest and held herself away.
“I have to tell you now or I’ll never get the courage.” She swallowed, and her throat convulsed. “You remember that guy in the broken down truck we saw the other day?”
“Y
eah. Quinn something.” He struggled to remember the man’s face, but only recalled the leather doo-rag and jacket.
Her mouth trembled. “He-he came out of the restaurant by Lauri’s building today.”
Kade frowned. “He’s following us?”
She bit her lip. “I-it was Rob.”
“Rob who?” He couldn’t remember any Robs in their life. Her late husband was the only one who came to mind. In a flash, he recalled Anu’s strain, but Bree couldn’t be talking about that Rob. He was dead and buried.
Bree rolled away and sat up, staring down into his face. “Rob Nicholls, Kade. My first husband.”
He stared into her anguished eyes, the green deepened by a pain beyond words. And something else. A gleam of elation maybe? She’d loved Rob tremendously and had held Kade at arm’s length for months at first. Did she love him still? The thought was a butcher knife digging out his heart.
“Babe, you’ve been under a lot of stress lately. Don’t go buying into Dave’s fantasies. Rob is dead. You buried him.”
Tears spilled over her lashes and rolled down the curve of her cheek. “I thought I did,” she said. “Kade, don’t you think I know my own husband? The man I was married to for five years?”
Husband. The words shocked him as nothing else could. “You’re sure?” He wanted to block his ears and not hear her answer. He didn’t have to. The conviction was all over her face. He sat up and reached for her, and she came this time.
“What are we going to do?” she muttered.
Holding her, he tried to make sense of it. How had this happened? Where had Rob been all this time? He couldn’t imagine walking away from this woman like Rob had done. And he’d left his son to die in the wilderness. He had to have abandoned Dave after the plane crash. A man like that didn’t deserve this family. He didn’t deserve to have a mother like Anu.
He gripped her shoulders and pushed her away so he could see her face. If she still loved the scumbag, he’d be able to see it in her face. Their gazes locked, and he saw anguish in her eyes. “Do you still love him?”
She wet her lips but she held his gaze. “Of course I still have feelings for him,” she whispered. “He was my husband, Kade.”
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