She shook her head shortly. Her wavy hair felt soft as it tickled her face. “I don’t think it’s so clear.”
He grimaced, disappointment flushed his cheeks.
“I mean, last night was amazing and I really enjoyed myself,” she said, to which Evan smirked. “But I want to make sure that you’re in this. That even though we have our issues, you aren’t going to freak out again. I don’t want you coming in and out of my life, out of Olivia’s life.”
She clutched the sheet a little tighter against her, her knuckles turning white. Tears pricked at her eyes.
“Hey. I’m in this for good. For as long as you’ll have me. I just want to make you happy. I want you. I want everything with you.” Evan said. He sat up straighter and brushed his hand across the Catalina’s jawline. He ran the pad of his thumb over her cheek. She tilted her head into his touch.
A lump in her throat threatened to silence her. She swallowed and closed her eyes, focusing on the feel of Evan’s hand.
“This is crazy. This feels crazy. I don’t know what’s going on,” Catalina said.
“I love you, Catalina,” he said firmly. She opened her eyes and met his. “I love you and I have always loved you. Last night, you said that you loved me and that you wanted to be together. Is that still true? Is that still what you want?” He said earnestly, searching her face.
She nodded, looking down at the white sheet in front of her. “Yes,” she said quietly, “I meant it. I want to be with you. I don’t know how—”
He cut her off with a kiss. His mouth was warm and his lips were soft against her. He sucked gently on her lower lip and ran his hand through her hair. She gave into him and felt the electricity of the kiss straight through her. When he pulled away, she was breathless.
“To be honest, I don’t know how either. I’ve never let anyone in before. So, we can do this together. Learn how to move forward by each other’s sides together. I’ve been crazy without you these past few weeks and the months before that. I can’t seem to get you off my mind and I’m miserable without you. You make me happy and all I want for you is to be happy too,” Evan said.
“I am happy. I am happy here,” she whispered.
“I know that I haven’t been the easiest to understand the last year or so,” Evan said. Catalina rolled her eyes. “I’ve been dealing with some stuff. I know you understand. I didn’t want to tell you how I felt because the guilt was too much. I didn’t want you to feel pressured and I didn’t want to ruin what we had. I love spending time with you and Olivia and I didn’t want to tell you anything and you push me away.”
“You kind of ended up doing that anyways,” Catalina said.
“I know. I messed up, but I think I can make that up to you.” He smiled. “I’ll get started on that while I enjoy having you here in my bed, listening to you go on and on about how much you love me.”
“Oh, I’m going on and on, am I?” She smiled back at him.
“Yes. I think you were waxing poetic about my mind blowing love making skills.” He smirked as his kissed gently down her throat.
“I definitely don’t think I was doing that.” She laughed.
He looked up her, pouting. “Hmm, I must have been mistaken. I better remind you of those skills then.” He continued to kiss down her body. He gently pushed her thighs apart with his palms. Catalina looked down at him and he grinned at her from between her legs. He gently pulled her lips apart started placing soft kisses along her hot skin. Her body reacted immediately. Her back arching off the bed, heat radiating up her body, flushing her olive skin. She threw her head back, her long hair brushing off her shoulders.
“God, you are so beautiful, Cat. I want to live in this moment forever,” He said as he lowered his mouth back down to her clit and started sucking gently on her. He swirled his tongue along her outer lips, dipping his tongue into her and tasting her wetness.
Catalina moaned his name over and over again. He lifted away from her for a moment to wet two of his fingers. He slowly placed them inside of her while returning to pad his tongue over her lips and nub over and over again. He curled his fingers up as he pumped them slowly into her and as he worked his mouth on her. Flashes exploded behind Catalina’s eyes and she arched her hips up to meet his fingers and his mouth.
She grabbed and pulled at her nipples as she crested over the wave of her orgasm. Sweat glistened on her skin and while she finally came down from her high and stopped gasping for air, Evan planted small, light kisses along her hipbone. He pulled himself up to the pillows, flopping his curly blond hair on the pillowcase.
Catalina looked over at his shit-eating grin. “So, I think I’ve earned some of that praise.”
“Don’t get too cocky now.” Catalina brushed her hair out of her face. He wiggled his eyebrows at her, glancing slightly at his erection laying against his stomach.
“I think it’s a little late for that,” he said. She smiled and wrapped her hand around him. He growled.
“Maybe it’s time for me to earn a little praise,” she said, moving her hand up and down slowly over the head of his cock, her fingers squeezing a little bit, making Evan’s eyes roll back in his head.
“Cat, I love everything you did. You are amazing. You don’t have to do anything for me, you know. I wanted to taste you. I didn’t expect—”
Evan’s words stopped when Catalina shimmied down the bed to wrap her lips around him, swirling her tongue around the ridge on the underside of his cock. He sucked air through his teeth and moaned her name.
She moved her head slowly up and down as she took him further into her mouth. He watched with heavy lidded eyes. He brushed back her hair and held it behind her head. His hand on her head made me feel more bold. She met his eyes and started to move faster. His mouth fell open.
“Goddamn, Cat.” He groaned.
She moved her mouth off of him, giving the head of his cock once last swirl with her tongue. She sat up and straddled him, rubbing against him. He quickly rolled a condom onto himself before she slid onto him slowly, reveling in the feeling of him stretching her. She leaned her chest down and brushed her breasts against his chest. Her nipples perked up as they grazed his skin.
He groaned as she leaned up to kiss him, teasing her tongue along his bottom lip. She kissed along his jawline, nipping at him gently as she moved her hips in languid circles, gasping at the friction inside of her. He moved his hands up to cup and massage her breasts, rubbing his thumb over her hardened nipples.
Catalina rode him until she fell apart again under his touch. Evan moaned her name and dug his fingertips into her hips. He thrust his hips to meet her as he came.
When she collapsed on top of him afterward, he wrapped his arms around her torso and squeezed her bare chest to his. He felt like home.
CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR
One Year Later
“Olivia, you get your butt down here. You’re going to be late for school!” Catalina yelled up the steps to Olivia’s room. She heard some banging around in her room. Olivia insisted upon dressing herself. She was seven years old going on fifteen.
Catalina walked back to the kitchen and watched Evan as he swiftly poured pancake batter onto the hot pan. His back was turned to her and she watched the back of his shirt as his muscles flexed with every spoonful of batter. A rare morning where he didn’t have to rush to start baking for his business so he could make them all breakfast. He shifted a little uneasy on his feet. His leg still ached on most mornings. The doctors said that the screws in his legs might do that from time to time. His hair was shorter, she managed to convince him to do that much, but it still curled at the base of his neck. The sight of which made Catalina feel like reaching out her hand and running her fingers through it.
Instead, she walked over silently and wrapped her arms around his middle. He jumped a little.
“Jeez, Cat. You’re so quiet. You get me every time.” Evan laughed, rubbing his hand along her arm that was wrapped around him.
“I
have some ninja powers.” She laughed.
He turned to her, his blue apron was spotted with flour. “Since we have today off, I don’t want to hear you being so quiet if you catch my drift.” He said.
He kissed her. His lips were full and plush but the kiss became more powerful when they were interrupted.
“Eeeeewwww, you guys totally love each other.” Olivia bounded into the room, wrinkling her nose at them.
“Yup. Totally.” Catalina wrinkled her nose at Evan as she broke their kiss. He gave her a quick kiss on the forehead as he turned to flip the pancakes.
“Are you ready for school, ladybug?” Catalina asked. Olivia was putting her lunch box in her backpack.
“I think so, Momma.” She said.
“I’m so excited, I can hardly contain myself!” Evan said, putting the fresh pancakes on the plates in front of the girls.
Olivia rolled her eyes. “That’s because you don’t want me beating you in Candy Land anymore.”
“That’s because you stack the deck, you little cheater,” Evan teased. “Those kids in first grade must have taught you all that naughty stuff. I’m actually afraid for what you’ll learn in second grade. Maybe how to hot-wire a car or hack into government computers.”
Olivia giggled at him.
Catalina swirled syrup onto her pancakes and took a sip of her coffee. Evan and Olivia continued to banter about Olivia going into the second grade. The sun was shining outside in a late warm front. Evan found this small bungalow close to the bakery and to Olivia’s school six months before. It had been perfect, a way to start over, moving in with Evan.
Catalina expected Olivia to have some adjustment time but Olivia was having more fun than anything. There was laughter in the house again. Jokes and giggles and tickle fights.
“Okay, you two. We have to make the school drop off or Principal Gilmore will have my head. That woman really doesn’t like me,” Catalina said, finishing her pancakes.
“Don’t worry, Momma. She loves Evan. I’m sure she wouldn’t yell at him,” Olivia said. Evan scrunched up his nose at her.
“Alright, Livvy, let’s get going before I have to sweet talk your principal,” Evan said as he moved to clear the plates from the table. He leaned over and gave Catalina a quick kiss on the cheek.
Olivia took off toward the front door to get her new shoes on.
“Hey, you okay?” Evan asked, lowering his voice.
Catalina nodded. “Yeah. I’m okay. Thank you.” She smiled at him, tilting her head back for another kiss from him.
He kissed her slowly and deeply again.
“We were interrupted earlier. I still owe you.” He smirked at her.
“The minute we get back from dropping her off?” She arched her eyebrow.
“I don’t even know if I’ll make it all the way to the front door,” Evan said, his voice husky with desire.
Catalina groaned into his mouth when he moved in for another kiss.
He moved toward the sink with the dirty dishes, and Catalina turned to put her shoes on.
She looked at the front door and took a deep breath. The shackles of grief from the last few years were cast off. She was free from the past, although it always existed in the shadowy parts of life.
This was the present and she was looking forward. Evan came up behind and laced his fingers in hers. Olivia opened the front door, and they went out into the world.
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Danielle Donaldson writes from Southern California where she lives with her husband and young son. Her novels are stories of hope. The smallest candle is still fighting the shadows. Every person has their struggles, their darkness but the cycle of life continues and the light might be around the next bend. Check out more of her work including her poetry and short stories at WriterDanielleDonaldson.com. She'd love to hear from you.
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Acknowledgements
So many wonderful people helped make this book a reality. I would like to thank Sheri Williams and Julie Sturgeon for their hard work on making sure the story was as strong as it could be. Clarissa Wild did beautiful work on the cover art.
Of course, I would have never taken the plunge into publishing if it weren’t for the kick-ass Writing Wenches (and barkeeps). Thank you for being my friends, mentors and cheerleaders. This book wouldn’t be here without your support, kindness and pictures of hot men.
I am so grateful family and friends that continue to root for me and believe in me.
Finally, thank you to my wonderful husband, David. Without him, I wouldn’t have had the moxie needed to complete the story and put it out into the world. Thank you for pushing me out of the door to finish my writing and editing. Thanks for working hard for our family and most of all, thank you for our two wild and beautiful sons.
Recovery Road Page 17