by Kyle Autumn
My heart picks up speed, racing as reality sets in. I pull my sleeves over my hands as I ask, “Is that what all this is about?”
Keaton shrugs. “Honestly, this was Jane’s idea. She thought turnabout was fair play.”
“That conniving…” I shake my head and try to focus on what’s important. “It’s been hard to even think about you without remembering everything that happened with my dad, how we were connected but didn’t even know it…” I squeeze my eyes shut so I don’t cry some more. “I’m so thankful that I was finally able to mourn my mother and process what happened.” Crossing my arms over my chest, I open my eyes and release a deep exhale. “But it was fucked up, you know?”
He bobs his head. “I know. So I hope this helps. Do whatever you want. Make this right in your head.”
I finger the rope around his wrists and put my free hand on my hip. “You agreed to this?”
“If it means you’ll take the fact that we need to talk seriously?” He raises his eyebrows. “No question.” Then he relaxes his face. “Though I thought I’d have to tie you down again instead. I didn’t think it’d need to be me.”
We both laugh a little, and he nudges my foot with his toe.
“We do need to talk,” I tell him, keeping my gaze aimed toward the floor. Holding my belly, I think over all the things I want to say and want to hear from him. There’s just so much that it’s overwhelming, so I take a deep breath and look at him again. “The answer is yes.” Then I sniffle before I finish with, “Yes, I can.”
His expression goes from intent listening to totally hopeful. His face lights up, his eyes widen, and his mouth gradually curves up into a smile. “You read my letters.”
With watery eyes and flared nostrils, I swallow hard and nod rapidly. “All of them.”
At that, he starts to look nervous. Slowly, he repeats, “All of them?”
Now, it’s my mouth’s turn to unhurriedly curve into a grin. “Yep.” I pop the P at the end.
“Even the part where—”
“Mmhm,” I hum, bopping him on the nose with my finger. “Even the part where you admitted to touching yourself to images of me”—I flick my ponytail over my shoulder—“before we met.” Then I wink at him.
Hesitantly, he asks, “And…you don’t think I’m a disgusting pig?”
I shake my head, tearing up again. He’d never be disgusting to me. Maybe I didn’t like what he’d done—or hadn’t done, in his case. But I can get through that if he works on it all with me.
“Come here,” he says softly before flashing his gaze to his lap.
Gently, I ease myself onto him, hoping my weight doesn’t crush him. “I’m so sorry,” I breathe into his neck. Then I inhale his scent of spice and home. “I’ve been a fucking mess, and I didn’t realize you felt so strongly.”
“That’s my fault.” He nuzzles his nose against my neck. “What can I do to make it up to you?”
With him this close, touching the sensitive skin of my neck… Okay, all of my skin is sensitive right now, but still. There’s only one thing I can think of right now. One thing I want to do with him more than anything else right in this moment. And I hope my pregnant belly doesn’t make him turn me down.
So I say, with all the seduction I can muster, “Actually, I do have something in mind…”
34
Keaton
I could kiss Jane right now.
Okay, no, I wouldn’t do that. But I’m beyond thankful that she tied me to this chair. And I never thought I’d say that in my life. Yet here we are.
“Anything you want, Ali,” I tell her right in her ear. “Just say the word and it’s yours.”
She leans back and looks me in the eye, raising one eyebrow. “There’s only so much you can do while tied to a chair.”
I raise one of my own eyebrows right back at her, my dick throbbing behind the zipper of my jeans. “Challenge accepted.”
Immediately, she springs out of my lap and onto her feet. Well, it takes a little bit of effort with her belly, but she manages just fine. I wanted to help her, but like she said, I’m tied to the chair. She doesn’t need me though. She starts peeling her clothes off without me.
“I’m gonna need a little assistance here,” I remind her.
“Shh.” She presses a finger to her lips. “I can handle this. Don’t worry.” Then she winks at me.
Fuck, my woman is sexy. Everything about her is amazing, from her head to her toes. Though she doesn’t let me see everything. Only her pants and her panties have made it to the floor. She leaves her sweater on.
“You can take that off too if you want,” I say. Maybe it’s selfish, though I’ve already established that I can be a selfish asshole. I’m working on it.
She shakes her head, her expression turning solemn. “Not yet. Not until you can touch all of me.” Before approaching me, she says, “Is that okay?”
Just being in her presence makes everything okay, so I nod and tell her, “Of course. Whatever you want to do. But I look forward to that part.” Then I grin at her.
A small smile touches her lips before she schools her mouth back to neutral. It’s almost like she doesn’t want to let herself believe that this is real, but it is. It’s more than real, and I’ll do everything I can to prove that to her tonight with everything I do.
When she reaches me, she kneels in front of me. I flex against the rope, wanting so badly to reach out and touch her. Instead, I have to sit still and allow her to take the reins. Let her run the show. Which I have to say is pretty fucking sexy.
“I can kinda see why your fantasy was to be kidnapped,” I tell her as she unzips my jeans, my cock ready to bust out of them. “This is fucking hot.”
She yanks them down as much as she can, grinning from ear to ear. “I know. And I’ll always have the memories of what we did together when I was in the chair like this.”
Before I can say how much it means to me that she has positive memories from that night, she takes my rock-hard dick in her mouth and hollows her cheeks out.
Holy. Fuck.
Not being able to touch her or hold her head while she feeds my length deep down her throat heightens the sensations like nothing I’ve ever experienced before. I still have a little room to thrust into her mouth, so I use what little leverage I have to try to find a tempo. Soon, though, she takes over completely and I relax into it, allowing her the space to do what she needs to do to make better memories.
Except that I’m about to come all down her throat, and that isn’t how I want to finish this. It isn’t how soon I want to finish this, either.
“Babe,” I manage to say through panting breaths. “I’m gonna… You have to stop…”
She sucks hard one last time as she gives me a disappointed pout. Then she pops me out of her mouth. “I barely got started,” she whines in a cute voice, getting to her feet by pressing on my leg for support.
I chuckle. “I know, but it’s been five months since I’ve…” Whoops. I let my words trail off. I don’t need to complain about my lack of a love life without her. Or sound like I’m bragging about staying celibate while waiting for her. That’s not what’s happening here.
She gasps, one hand covering her mouth. From behind it, she asks, “You haven’t been with anyone since me?”
I press my lips together before shaking my head without looking at her. Because I don’t want to have to face the fact that she didn’t do the same thing. It wouldn’t have been fair of me to ask, so I didn’t. And she wasn’t mine while we were apart, but I can’t expect her to have sworn off men until she got her head right.
Plus…the obvious. She’s pregnant. There was someone in her life right around the time I met her. Either before me or after me, so it doesn’t mean the baby is mine if there wasn’t anyone after me.
“I haven’t, either,” she admits breathily right after she drops her hand from her mouth.
Upon hearing that, I nearly have the strength to flex right out of the ropes bindi
ng me to this chair. “Let’s fix that for the both of us, shall we?” I practically growl at her.
She wastes no time before rushing to my lap and straddling me the best she can with my limited mobility. And it’s merely seconds before her pussy envelops my dick in a way too perfect for words. Her guttural moan rumbles through my chest as she throws her head back and bounces on my cock like I’m her personal dildo. Which I’ll gladly be for the rest of my life.
Bounce, bounce, bounce. She’s a pro at leaning back just enough so her stomach doesn’t get in the way. But then I worry about all of that movement for the baby and make her stop by taking the thrusting over.
“Let me do the work, baby,” I tell her, and she easily gives in because I keep the pace she set for us.
Thrust, thrust, thrust. She’s moaning her pleasure, which spurs mine on. So much so that I think I’m going to blow any second now. She’s tight and warm and it’s like I’ve died and gone to heaven. Luckily, she shouts my name and her pussy flutters around my cock in nearly seconds, so I climax along with her and lazily pump inside her to help her ride her orgasm out.
Then she sags against me, a light sheen of sweat building her brow. “Let’s get you out of these ropes,” she says. “I wanna see what else you can do.”
No, this isn’t talking. But this is certainly some kind of progress.
So I nod and promise to show her everything I can do.
35
Ali
He wasn’t kidding. He did show me everything he can do. And then some. Whew boy.
I guess Jane was right. Having made new memories with Keaton, I feel quite a bit better. Though I think we could have made any kind of new memories. They didn’t have to be of him tied up in a chair. Yet I can’t say I’m mad about that. That part of it was fantastic.
However, now, his pregnant lady is tuckered out. Now that we’re comfy and snuggled in my bed, I’d love to fall asleep. But I’d also love to get to the bottom of all of this. What exactly is happening with us right now? What does he expect from me after this? How do we move toward a real relationship that isn’t based on painful memories of the past and damn good sex?
I guess I have to stay awake to find out.
And I guess I should be the one to make it happen.
“So…you have a job,” I hedge. “Tell me about it?”
He props his head up on his bent arm. “It’s construction work. Hard but kind of rewarding in a way.”
I poke his bicep. “I can tell.” Then I break into a silly grin.
He smiles back, but he doesn’t let it break him from the conversation. “What about you? How’s graphic design?”
I blow a breath out of my mouth to move my sweaty hair off my forehead. “Oh, it’s good. I started writing articles for websites some more too. And I also got a part-time job with Jane, serving tables at the café down the street.”
His eyebrows scrunch together as he puts his free hand on my hip. “You shouldn’t be on your feet so much, should you?”
Ah, here we go. It’s always going to lead here until we clarify the “elephant in the room,” as he called it. But I’m still kind of hurt that he hasn’t asked if the baby is his. Does he not want to know because he’s not serious about us? No, that’s ridiculous. He’s told me as much. So why hasn’t he come out and asked?
“Don’t worry about it,” I tell him. “I’m fine.”
“Hey.” He scoots closer to me, his bare legs tangling with mine. Then he puts pressure on my hip with his hand. “Don’t shut down on me, okay? You can talk about this with me.”
I gaze at my belly for several moments, not knowing what to say. Then words start to pour out of me. “Look, I’m about to have a baby. That has to come first. And I’m scared and nervous as hell because I have no idea what I’m doing, but I’m okay with that. It is what it is, and I’m excited to bring a new life, a fresh start, into the world. I can do better than my dad did for me, and that’s the only thing that matters right now. So, if you don’t want to be a part of that, you have to tell me now. I’m going to need someone serious about me and the baby, not someone who will change his mind a month in because it’s hard.”
I sneak a peek at him and find him watching me intently, a small, content smile on his lips. For some reason, that makes me worried, so I return my gaze to my belly and continue free-flowing my thoughts.
“But I also don’t want someone who is in it for the wrong reasons. I read your letters, so I know how you say you feel, but we don’t have much time to really get to know each other and who we are now. And, really, we don’t know each other well. I may turn out to be someone you don’t even like, Keaton. And that’s fucking terrifying,” I finish on the beginnings of a sob.
He pulls me close to him, resting my head on his shoulder. “I hear you. But all I need to know is that you want to give this a shot.”
Allowing the truth to come through, I nod against his body and sniffle, something I seem to do a lot around him. “And you do? Even though I cry all the time when I’m with you?”
His laughter shakes us both lightly, his stubble rough but satisfying on my skin. “Ali,” he says, squeezing me to him and then leaning back, his hand on my shoulder, “we can change that. Everything can be as different or as similar as you want it to.”
I nod again as he wipes my tears.
“Plus,” he adds, dead serious, “it helps that you taste like candy and I’ll never get enough.”
At that, I burst out laughing. “Some things never change, actually.” Then I snuggle against him, and he wraps me in his arms. “But really, Keaton. It might take a lot of time to work through all the memories I have. To get past the past, you know? And I only have four months left before the baby is here…”
The breath he exhales through his nose tickles my skin. “I can’t predict the future, either. But we’ve both learned that living in fear is no way to live at all. If we never take chances, we’ll never truly live. Together,” he says, squeezing me a little more, “we can face the unknown.” After pulling back, he rests his forehead against mine. “The same way we were going to in the first place. We can do that now.”
I close my eyes and breathe deeply. His scent fills my nose as I will my brain to follow my heart’s path and believe every word Keaton said. No, we can’t predict the future, and I hadn’t thought my future would include him or even someone like him when I was in hiding from my father. Now, though, the option is on the table, and with my heart in it too, I’d be stupid not to grab it.
He pulls me out of my thoughts and surprises me by asking, “May I?” with his hand hovering over my belly.
I squint at him, curious about his request and not sure what to make of it. My lips tip up though—the request was adorable as hell. But my heart starts to pound as my pulse picks up. Is he finally going to ask the question I’ve been waiting for him to ask?
He scoots down the bed to be closer to my stomach. When he gets there, I roll onto my back and watch him. He places his hands on my rounded belly and then presses his warm lips on the skin between them, propped up on an elbow.
The scene gets me all emotional again. I tear up as he tenderly caresses my skin, and after I wipe a tear trailing down my cheek, I put that hand in his hair to rub over his head. But he still doesn’t speak. Still doesn’t ask that one question I’m sure he’s dying to ask.
So I do it for him. “Aren’t you wondering if the baby is yours?”
With his cheek on my belly, he looks at me and softly shakes his head. “I have been, but I’m not anymore. It honestly doesn’t matter. Because I will help raise them like they’re my own if I have that chance.”
Nothing in this world wants me to stop crying today. Not a thing.
A breathy, watery, “Keaton,” is all I can push past my lips before breaking down into a puddle of tears yet again.
He comes back up the bed and pulls me against his chest. “I love you, Ali,” he whispers in his ear. “Kidnapping fantasies and all.”
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Through the tears, I start to giggle. But it chokes me up, which makes me laugh even harder. When I finally calm back down, I sigh and tell him, “I love you too,” with a hand on his stubbly cheek. “And our son.”
His eyes light up as his eyebrows rise on his forehead. “As in…”
I nod, my smile wide. “As in you’re having a son whether you love my kidnapping fantasy or not.”
I’m not sure his lips could stretch into a bigger grin. But I wasn’t sure how I could ever find it in me to trust, let alone love, someone as much as I trust and love Keaton, either. Yet here we are. Trusting and loving and having a baby.
With an honest and open heart, anything is possible.
Epilogue
Keaton
“Caden has been dropped off at Jane’s,” Ali says as soon as I walk in the door, her back to me as she washes the dishes. “So I hope you’re ready to do your worst. It’s been a hot minute.”
When my wife looks as amazing as she does, I’m always ready to do my worst.
She’s right though. It has been a hot minute. That’s what happens when you have a baby. Your priorities shift, and though we both know we’re still here for each other if we need anything, it’s been difficult to find that kind of time together for the last several months.
That doesn’t matter though. The past year and a half has been about getting to know each other’s needs, wants, and desires. I know Ali inside and out now, and she means way more to me than just sex. She always has, even though we’re like fireworks exploding when we do find time between the sheets. Or in a chair, as we tend to prefer.
Ali doesn’t know it yet, but I’m coming for her. Literally.
I say nothing as I approach her from behind and cover her mouth with a gloved hand. My body presses hers closer to the sink, my dick already hard from the physical contact with her. That’s all it takes these days—well, that’s all it’s ever taken with her, really. Her body goes solid against mine, but then her gaze flicks up to the reflection in the window. When she sees that it’s me, I lean in close to her ear.