by Abbi Glines
She didn’t look back at me. I watched as she walked out the front door with the click of her heels echoing through the house. She would come back one day. She would love me one day. But for now, she had to go. She had to be mad. And letting her go was something I could do.
Della
Nile Andrews had my eyes. Or I had his. When his eyes met mine as I stepped into the restaurant, I could see that he noticed it, too.
I was more nervous about this than meeting Glenda. I’d never had a father. I didn’t know what that felt like. What a meeting with the man whose sperm gave me life would even be like. My first question had been, did he really want to have this meeting? The answer was clearly yes. He’d boarded a plane to Atlanta hours after I’d called him that morning. He said he could meet me at seven at this restaurant. I had been surprised by his desire to come here so soon. I had even expected him to make excuses.
“Hello, Della,” he said as he stood up and held out his hand for me to shake.
“Hello, Nile,” I replied, slipping my hand into his. He was tall. Glenda had said he played basketball and I could see why. His hair was a dark color that contrasted greatly with his blue eyes. He was a handsome man. I could see what Glenda’s teenage heart had seen.
“I’m so glad you wanted to meet me. I’ve been waiting for that call since Glenda let me know she found you.”
He hadn’t wanted me. But he’d been a seventeen-year-old boy. I couldn’t hold that against him. It wasn’t like he had been an adult who had made the decision to give me away. He hadn’t been old enough to be a parent yet. Not really.
“I like Glenda,” I said simply.
Nile grinned and he sat down after I did. “Yeah, she’s something else.”
There was a tenderness in his eyes that surprised me. He had loved her once. It had been young love but he had loved her. It had been real. And somewhere deep down it had never really gone away for him. Glenda didn’t get that soft look in her eyes when she talked about Nile. She admired the man he had become and said his wife was gorgeous and perfect for him. Nile reacted differently.
“I guess she told you about what happened,” he said.
I nodded. “She did. I understand. You were both young.”
He studied me a moment, then shook his head. “You look so much like her. It’s amazing. But you got my eyes. My other girls don’t have my eyes. They got their mother’s. But you got them.”
His other girls. He hadn’t called them his girls. He hadn’t made them sound exclusive. He had said other. Something in me warmed. In his mind I was one of his girls. I didn’t know him. I hadn’t even known about him until a few days ago. But he had always known I existed.
“Did you know that I was a girl . . . before you heard from Glenda?”
A frown creased his forehead, then a small smile touched his lips. “Yeah. She told me. After you were born she told me she held you. That you were perfect and that she’d given you away. I got drunk that night. Real drunk. Wrecked my dad’s car and almost lost my scholarship. I went a little self-destructive for a while. I was a kid myself but I kept seeing this small baby whose face I had never seen, and I knew she was mine. But I’d never held her. I’d never been able to kiss her.” He shook his head. “It was the hardest thing I’d ever experienced. Then Glenda moved. Without a word of explanation she was gone. I didn’t see or hear from her for over thirteen years. Then one day she called me. She wanted to find you. I didn’t want to. It wasn’t because I didn’t want to see you, because I did. I was just afraid to see her. She, uh . . .” He cleared his throat and tugged at his collar. “She’s my one that got away. You never quite get over that one.”
I felt like pointing out that she hadn’t gotten away, that he’d sent her running, but I didn’t. That ship had sailed. They were both married with kids. “What are your daughters like?” I asked. I had never had siblings. Not ones that I remembered. To know I had half siblings in this world was hard to comprehend. I was curious about them. I wanted to know if they were anything like me.
Glenda’s daughter was young but she had a free spirit. She’d told me I looked like a princess. She asked me if I could fly a plane and told me that one day she was going to fly planes. I had been fascinated with her. All her long blond hair, like her father’s. Her name was Samantha but they called her Sammy. I liked knowing she was my sister. That what she was could have been me. I could have been like that as a child. I could have been so free. Knowing she would get a chance to live her dreams and have a family around her that loved her made me happy. It made the heaviness on my shoulders ease.
“Three of them are difficult but they’re fun too. Jasmine is the oldest by one minute and fifty-six seconds, and she doesn’t let the other two forget it. Jocelyn is the middle child and she’s the most like me. She plans to be a basketball star. Then there is my baby, July. That’s the month I met their mother. She’s what warms me when I need it most. July is the perfect name for her. She’s also the sweetest and most forgiving.”
“They all have J names,” I said, smiling at the idea.
“Their mother’s name is Jillian.”
I liked that. “I would like to meet them,” I said.
Nile’s smile grew. “I would love that. So would they. I told them about you after I got the call from Glenda. Jillian already knew about the baby . . . about you. So, she stood behind the idea of me meeting you. She would like to meet you too.”
“Okay,” I replied.
The server appeared and we ordered our drinks and Nile asked if I wanted an appetizer. I wasn’t really hungry at the moment so I told him no. Once the server left he turned his attention back to me. “What was your life like growing up, Della?”
This was a question that Glenda hadn’t asked me. I had been prepared for her to ask me but she never did. Because of that, I had let my guard down with Nile. He was different. He wanted to know. He wasn’t afraid to hear the answer. I could tell that Glenda was afraid of the truth.
“It wasn’t easy. I wanted to meet you because I needed to know what the people who created me were like. I needed to know I was going to be okay. But I’m not ready to share my past with you. Honestly, I don’t think you want details. If I were you, I wouldn’t want to know.”
Nile’s face paled at my words and his jaw worked back and forth. I picked up my water and took a drink. I was more honest with him than I had planned on being. But the words had come out without a filter.
“You’re wrong. I want to know,” he said in a quiet tone.
I shook my head. “No, you think you do but you don’t. And I don’t like talking about it. I’m still working through some things. Meeting you and Glenda and seeing with my own eyes that you have healthy, happy children is what I need right now. It eases fears that I’ve lived with a long time.”
Nile leaned his elbows on the table and studied me. “You’re scaring the shit out of me,” he said.
He had no idea.
“Nile, I want to get to know you. But I plan on taking that slow and doing it when I can deal with it. One day I’m sure I’ll be ready to tell you about my life. Until that moment, I don’t want to discuss it again.”
He took a long, deep breath through his nose, then nodded. “Okay. Fine. But the father in me wants to fix things.”
He wasn’t my father. He was someone else’s but he wasn’t mine. He just provided the sperm that helped create me. “The male in you wants to fix things. Not the father in you.”
He started to say something and stopped. A smile broke across his face and he leaned back. “Who is he? The man who wants to fix things for you?”
I fidgeted with the napkin in my lap. “I’m not talking about that, either.”
“Why not? Did he hurt you?”
I shook my head. “No, he never hurt me.”
Woods
I stood looking out the window of the conference room while I waited on my new board members to arrive. I had now talked to all of them. Everyone I had asked
had agreed. Well, everyone except one of them. He would come around though. In time.
My thoughts went back to Della. I had twenty-four more hours before I was going after her. She would arrive here by then or I was going to Georgia and Braden could get over it. I had agreed with her at first but I didn’t agree now. It was taking too long. Every day Della was away from me, she convinced herself even more that I didn’t want her.
“I feel like a badass,” Jace drawled.
I turned to look at him. He was standing in the doorway with a cup of coffee and a grin on his face. “When did we get so damn old?” he asked, then chuckled and walked inside.
“We’re not old,” I replied.
“Who’s old? I’m not fucking old,” Thad said as he followed Jace into the room.
I had debated asking Thad to be a part of the board. He was rarely serious and he still thought he was seventeen most of the time. But he was one of us. His father had been a board member. He should be one too.
“I’m old. That’s who’s old,” Darla announced as she walked into the room with her iPad in her hands, typing away at it. She was always working. That was why she was the best.
“No, you’re not. You’re wise,” I assured her.
She snorted and barely glanced up from what she was working on before she took her seat.
“This kind of feels like the knights of the fucking round table,” Grant said as he sauntered into the room with a grin and a glass of what I assumed was bourbon. He really was drinking a lot more these days. I wondered if Rush knew about this.
“This needs to be quick. Nate’s checkup is in two hours. I have to be there. They weigh him and shit. I don’t want to miss that,” Rush said as he walked into the room, followed by Dean.
“I’m not missing it either,” Dean said, reaching into his pocket and pulling out a pack of cigarettes.
“No smoking in here, Dean,” I told him.
He grumbled. “You bunch of prejudiced asses. No one lets me smoke anywhere around here. It’s fucking insane. I need to go back to home where I can smoke a joint on that street if I get the urge.”
I ignored his rock star hissy fit. We were all here. At least the ones who were in Rosemary. We were missing two. One would take her place soon. The other still had his shit to figure out.
“Are you drinking bourbon this early?” Rush asked, looking at Grant with a frown.
Grant rolled his eyes and leaned back, propping his feet on the table. “Yeah,” was his response.
“Really? You’ve started drinking whiskey before lunch?” Rush wasn’t giving in and I really didn’t want them having this fight in here.
“He’s fucking your sister. Hell, anyone that stupid has to drink to stay sane,” Dean said in a bored tone.
Shit. This was gonna go downhill fast.
“Don’t respond to that, either of you,” I said, standing at the head of the table.
“It’s okay. It’s true,” Grant said, and held up his drink with a grin that didn’t reach his eyes.
Rush swore under his breath.
“Harlow’s too damn sweet for you. You know that, don’t you, boy? She don’t need Nan’s seconds. She’s too good for that. She’s the kind of girl you can look at but can’t touch. They’re too unattainable for guys like us. Only those who can reach the pedestal she’s on can touch her,” Dean said.
“Harlow?’ Rush asked, looking at his dad in confusion. “What’s Harlow got to do with this?”
Dean just grinned. “What happens in LA stays in LA.” He winked at Grant. “Don’t it, boy?”
Yeah . . . there was a lot I didn’t know. I was pretty damn sure I didn’t want to know either. “Okay, let’s get off Grant’s private life and let’s focus on the point of this meeting. As you all know, you are now my board of directors. I don’t make decisions without meeting with this group and discussing it. You are my advisers. It’s time to take the Kerrington Club into the next generation. We’re going to do that together.”
Darla’s pleased smile as she sat back and listened to me talk meant more than she could have known. She was proud of me. Right now, I needed someone to be proud of me.
“Does this mean we can get rid of those damn coming-out balls? That shit is ancient,” Jace said.
“Hey. Don’t knock the coming-out ball. The girls get all sentimental, which leads to horniness,” Thad argued.
“Could you please watch what you say in here, Thad? We have a lady on the board and another will be joining us soon.”
Thad looked properly guilty. “Sorry, Miss Darla,” he said sheepishly.
“No worries, Thad. I’ve been watching your horny ass screw through my cart girls for years.”
The entire room went silent, then burst into laughter. This was a good group. We would make my grandfather proud.
Della
I opened the door as Tripp came walking up to it. I’d been expecting him. I had called him over an hour ago. Told him we needed to talk.
“You look good, Della. Much better than the girl I left here,” he said before stepping into the house.
“Thank you. A lot has changed,” I said, then motioned for him to go to the living room.
“Apparently it is a good change. You look almost happy.”
Almost was a stretch. I wasn’t happy. I missed Woods. I missed him so much it hurt. “Not sure if I’ll be able to achieve happy, but I hope to,” I said simply.
Tripp sat down in the closest chair, stretched his legs out in front of him, and looked up at me. “Talk, Della girl. I’m listening.”
“I’m not going to South Carolina. I’m not sure what I’m going to do next but I won’t be going with you. Thank you for everything. Thank you for putting up with me for the past two weeks and helping me when I needed it. What you did means more than words could ever express. I promise to pay you back every penny you spent. As soon as I get a job I’ll start sending you money. I have your address.”
Tripp frowned. “Don’t send me any money. Keep it. I had fun. I had a traveling buddy for a while.”
I wasn’t going to let him get away with that. I had taken two weeks of his life on the road and now he was staying in Atlanta this week while he waited on me. “No. I’m paying you back.”
Tripp smirked and shook his head. “I won’t argue with you right now,” he said.
“I found out some things this week,” I told him. “I’m not having night terrors anymore. I still have dreams and there’re still bad memories but I don’t get scared. The fear is gone. I just wake up.”
Tripp’s eyes went wide and he beamed at me. “That’s awesome, Della.”
I nodded because I agreed. It was amazing. I had conquered something. “Yeah, it is.”
“Are you going back to Rosemary?”
I wasn’t sure. Every minute that passed in which I didn’t have a panic attack and have to fight off the fear that used to overwhelm me, I wanted to go back. I wanted to show Woods that I was complete. I wasn’t broken anymore. I was whole. He could love me. I was safe to love. But had I burned that bridge?
“I don’t know,” I replied.
Tripp bit his bottom lip. He did that when he was thinking. Finally, he let it pop free. “Listen. I can’t say much because it isn’t my place, but go back. If you want to go back. Be brave and go back.”
I wish it was that easy. “What if he doesn’t want me back?”
Tripp shook his head. “Not possible. Trust me.”
“I left him. All I left was a note. He hasn’t looked for me. He must hate me.”
Tripp stood up and paced back and forth in front of the fireplace while biting his bottom lip again. What was he so worked up about?
I watched him, waiting for him to say something.
Finally, he stopped and ran his hand through his hair, pulling on the ends a little, like he was having a hard time with something. “Tripp, what’s wrong?” I asked.
He stared at me hard a minute. He knew something. Is Woods dating some
one else already? Surely not. Oh, God. I’m going to be sick. Could he move on like that?
“The money, it was all—”
“All because he was a good friend and wanted to help you, Della. Wasn’t it, Tripp?” Braden’s voice startled me as she interrupted Tripp.
He swallowed hard, then nodded. “Yeah,” he finally said.
That wasn’t what he was going to say. Braden knew what he was going to say and she had stopped him. She was keeping something from me. What was it?
I stood up and spun around to look at her. “Is he with someone else?” I asked. Just saying it ripped me into pieces. If she said yes I would crumple to the floor. I wouldn’t be able to deal with that.
Her eyes were determined. I could see she wanted to tell me but she wasn’t going to. “I think you need to go back to Rosemary and take back your man, if that’s what you want. I think that if you love Woods Kerrington, then you need to be brave enough to put your heart on the line and go after him. You need to stop fearing things, Della. This is your last obstacle. Face it.” Her voice cracked. “Please, Della. Go get him. If you want him. Go get him.”
He had moved on. I sank back down on the couch. “Oh, God,” I gasped as the pain started filling every inch of my body.
“No, Della—”
“Shut up, Tripp,” Braden snapped. She wanted me to know the truth. Tripp was trying to ease my pain because he was a good guy but Braden loved me enough to be honest.
“How do I go after him? He doesn’t want me,” I said, my voice no more than a whisper.
Braden knelt down in front of me. “You are beautiful, smart, kind, and selfless, and you’re the best friend I’ve ever had. I love you like a sister. You are my family. I’ve watched you hurt and I’ve watched you hide from your fears as if they really were those monsters under your bed that your mother threatened you with. In two days I’ve seen you face life with a strength I knew was in there but I’d never seen you use. If you want Woods Kerrington—if he is your forever—then go get him. Don’t doubt yourself. Don’t doubt your importance. People don’t love you and forget you, Della. You’re unforgettable.”