“Charlie, what is that? Is that a hawk?”
Sam’s voice finally penetrated his thoughts, and he followed the line of the boy’s finger, pointing through the windshield of the pickup. To the far right a bald, rocky mountain jutted into the clear New Mexico sky. Near the peak, a lone buzzard circled the barren formation, searching for even the smallest carcass.
“No,” Charlie told him. “That’s a buzzard. He’s bigger than a hawk, and he eats rotten meat.”
Violet shuddered. “Did you have to tell him that?”
He cast her a tired look. “Why not? It’s something he’ll learn in grade-school science.”
“He’s not yet in kindergarten, Charlie!”
Ignoring Violet’s protest, Charlie glanced down at Sam’s glowing face. “You’ll just have a head start on all those other boys, won’t you? You’ll know all about nature before they ever learn to tie their shoes.”
Sam giggled at the idea of being smarter than his classmates. “Tell me about the hawk, Charlie. What does he eat?”
“Well, that’s the big difference between the hawk and the buzzard. The hawk catches his food live. Like mice or little rabbits or chipmunks, and then he eats it while it’s still fresh. The buzzard is a lazy bird. He just flies around in circles, waiting for anything to die so he can eat it later.”
Rapt with attention, Sam drank in every word, while next to the passenger window, Violet groaned and shook her head. Since her blow-up at Charlie yesterday, she’d been trying not to smother Sam and allow him to do more physical things outside. But she wasn’t so sure he needed to learn science and geography and ranching. He was a baby. Her baby. This whole move from Amarillo had been to get him away from a possessive man. Now it looked as though Charlie was taking over.
“Could we ride Joe up there where that buzzard is now, Charlie?”
Charlie glanced once again at the sailing bird. “No. That’s a little too rough up there. Joe would probably lose a shoe, and then his hoof would hurt and he’d limp.”
“Why would it hurt?”
Charlie stifled a sigh. “Because it would get sore. Just like your feet would get sore if you tried to walk out there without your boots.” He pointed to the rough range in front of them.
“But I wouldn’t lose my boots, Charlie. I’d keep ’em on my feet.”
“Be quiet, Sam. You’re talking Charlie’s ear off.”
For the past fifteen minutes they had been traveling across an isolated part of the Pardee Ranch, and during the whole drive Charlie had wanted to tell the boy to hush. But now as he watched a dejected expression settle across his round cherub face, he berated himself for being selfish.
Sure, he’d come home to rest and get his mind off his work. But Sam was an innocent child. He couldn’t help it because his mother’s car had broken down or that he’d been forced to stay at Charlie’s cabin.
Even if Sam’s chatter got tiresome, Charlie found he couldn’t be short or indifferent to the boy. It just wasn’t in him. Roy hadn’t raised him to be that sort of man. And hopefully the man Violet eventually married would treat Sam kindly. But would he love him? Would he love Violet?
Now where the hell had those questions come from? Charlie asked himself. It was enough that he was helping them get their car fixed and back on the road. He couldn’t start wondering what would happen to them once they left here.
Annoyed with himself, he looked across to Violet’s solemn face. She had avoided his questions last night about her home and acquaintances back in Amarillo. He was still wondering what her answers might have been if she hadn’t bristled up. And he hadn’t kissed her.
Kissed her! Damn it, he’d kissed Violet O’Dell more in the past forty-eight hours than he had any woman in the past twelve months. That’s what he needed to be worried about. Not if the woman was going to be loved!
Five minutes later a group of buildings began to appear in the far distance. As they drew closer, Violet could see it was the Pardee Ranch. The house was a log structure similar to Charlie’s cabin, except on a much larger scale.
Cottonwoods, poplars and piñon pine shaded the yard and grew along the banks of a shallow river flowing a few yards from the back of the house. To the north was an intricate maze of cattle pens and connecting barns.
Violet was both surprised and impressed by the size and condition of the ranch. She hadn’t expected Charlie’s parents to be so different. It made her wonder even more why Charlie chose to stay in Texas and be a Ranger rather than live here and help his father raise cattle.
Justine greeted them at the door, and once again the woman clutched Charlie to her.
“I’m glad you decided to come to supper,” she said to them as they entered the house. “It gives me a reason to make a pig of myself. And Roy says I’m going to forget how to cook if I don’t start doing more of it.”
“Did Dad make it back from Las Cruces?” Charlie asked as they entered the house.
“No. He’ll probably get back tomorrow evening.”
She ushered them into the kitchen and insisted on Charlie and Violet having a glass of iced tea. For Sam, she poured a smaller glass of fruit punch.
While they all sipped their drinks, Justine caught Charlie up on the family news and some of the more difficult cases his father had been working on. Then, to Violet’s surprise, she urged her son to take Sam down to the barn to see the horses while supper finished cooking.
“Trying to get rid of me?”
There was a faint teasing tone to Charlie’s voice, but Violet got the impression he didn’t want to go to the barn or take Sam with him. Most likely the latter, she figured, Sam had already trailed after him for most of the day. She figured he was tired of the boy’s company.
“At least until I get the chilies fried, or you’ll be eating them before I can get them on the table.”
From his perch on a barstool, Charlie glanced down at Sam, who was patting his knee like a bongo drum.
“I want to go see the horses, Charlie. Can we?”
As Charlie looked at the child’s eager face, he wondered what his fellow rangers would think if they could see him now. Charlie Pardee playing stand-in daddy for a kid he hadn’t even met until a few days ago. And Violet? What would the guys think about her? No doubt that she was beautiful and sexy. And that Charlie was smitten with her. But he wasn’t. He damn well wasn’t going to let himself be.
Everything about her said she was just like Angela. She didn’t understand or even pretend to want to understand his being a lawman. He wasn’t about to lay his heart open and have her laugh at him. That sort of humiliation a man could only take once in his life.
“I suppose we can. But don’t start whining to ride,” he warned Sam.
Justine frowned crossly at her son. “It wouldn’t hurt if Sam wanted to ride Brown Sugar.”
. Charlie placed his empty tea glass on the bar and slid off the stool. “He’s already been on Joe twice today,” he pointed out to his mother.
Justine rolled her eyes, but Sam didn’t seem a bit perturbed at Charlie. Grinning from ear to ear, the boy’s little hand clamped around Charlie’s forefinger and began to tug him toward the door.
“I remember a time when you were just a little older than Sam,” Justine said to Charlie. “You rode all day long until your daddy would have to literally pull you out of the saddle.”
In other words, Charlie needed to remember what it was to be Sam’s age. Well, maybe he did need to remember. Maybe seeing all the guns and drugs and thieves and murderers and every crime committed against humanity had made him old and hard. But couldn’t his mother understand he had to be that way?
Charlie had to be tough-hided as Violet had called him. He couldn’t let the feel of Sam’s soft little hand wrapped trustingly around his penetrate his armor. He didn’t want the child’s gamin grin and sparkling, innocent eyes to remind him how, if nothing in his life changed, he was going to miss having a son or daughter. He was going to live the rest of his li
fe without a family of his own.
“When will supper be ready?” he asked impatiently.
“Whenever I yell off the back deck and let you know,” his mother told him.
With a worried expression, Violet watched Charlie and Sam leave the kitchen through a back door that led onto a redwood deck.
“Charlie’s going to think you really were trying to get rid of him,” she said to Justine.
“I was.”
Puzzled, she watched the woman tear Romaine lettuce into a big glass bowl. “But why? I thought you didn’t get to see your son enough?”
Justine smiled at Violet. “I don’t. But it will be good for him to spend time with Sam. He has no idea what being a father is like. Sometimes I don’t think he ever wants to have children of his own.”
“He told me as much,” Violet admitted, then immediately felt like kicking herself. “I mean...well, he didn’t exactly say he didn’t want them. He just...intimated that he didn’t believe he would ever have children.”
Justine sighed wearily, but she didn’t appear all that surprised or upset. “It’s—frustrating seeing your child unhappy.”
Violet left her seat at a small work table and joined Justine at the counter. “I know what you mean. All I want is for Sam to be happy.”
She glanced reflectively at Violet. “Being a Texas Ranger is ruining my son. And I don’t know what to do about it. I don’t even know if there’s anything I can do about it.”
Violet was inwardly stunned by the woman’s suggestions. True, Charlie Pardee didn’t seem like the moist joyous person in the world, but he had so much. Far more than Violet could ever dream of having. A big loving family. A respected job. What more did he want? Except a wife and children. And he’d already implied to Violet that he didn’t want those.
“What do you mean?” Violet asked her. “You’ve been married to a sheriff for all these years. I figured you were proud that Charlie was a lawman, too.”
For a moment Justine forgot the salad she was making. Her eyes lifted to the ceiling, then over to Violet. “Oh my dear, I am proud. Please don’t get me wrong. Charlie worked hard to become a member of a group of lawmen that are loved and respected not only in Texas, but everywhere. His father and I are thrilled that he’s accomplished that dream for himself. The trouble with Charlie is...he puts too much of himself into his job. He wants to make all things right, save and keep everyone from harm, solve every crime. Hasn’t he talked about it to you?”
Violet’s eyes widened. “Why no. He hasn’t told me much of anything about his job. The first night after we met, I asked him if he liked being a Ranger, and he gave me some wishy-washy answer like ‘being a lawman is just a way of life for me.”’
Justine sighed once more. “Well, he certainly spoke the truth. Roy was a lawman even before Charlie was born. I guess he stamped it into his genes or something.” She went back to ripping the lettuce leaves. “But Roy has the ability to stand back from his job and see it just for what it is...a job. For Charlie, being a lawman is his entire life.”
Violet leaned her hip against the cabinets. She felt as if she ought to be helping Justine finish supper, but she got the idea the woman would rather have Violet as a listening post than a cooking partner.
“If Charlie’s dream has always been to be a Ranger, he should be a contented man.”
Justine nodded. “He should be. But he isn’t. Surely you can see that.”
Violet had seen a lot about Charlie in the past three days. At times he was curt and moody and downright arrogant. He thought he knew what she and Sam needed in their lives and he didn’t take the subtle route of telling her. But oh, when he took her into his arms, he was the most perfect man she’d ever met.
“Well, since I only met your son a few days ago, I’m hardly one to say. I get the impression he isn’t the let’s-party-and-laugh sort.”
Justine’s head swung back and forth. “Charlie used to be a laid-back, happy-go-lucky guy. He was full of charm and humor. But little by little he’s changed. First, I noticed his laughter was growing less and less frequent, then the smiles and teasing grins he always had for his family and friends began to vanish, too. Now he’s as serious as a judge. And the only time he takes time off from his job is when his captain forces him to.”
In spite of all the infuriating things Charlie had said to her, the man was doing her and Sam a great kindness by giving her a job and letting them stay in his cabin until her car was repaired. The idea that he might be a troubled man bothered Violet greatly. She knew what it was like to be full of pain and dejection.
“Maybe your son is just getting older and more settled.”
“Charlie is nearly thirty. And he’s always been a settled man. Even as a teenager he wasn’t the sort to sow wild oats or flit from one job to the next. Far from it,” she said, then laughed softly as though to tell herself she needed to lighten up. “Charlie always knew he wanted to be a Ranger.”
As Violet watched the older woman dump a diced tomato into the salad bowl, she thought about all Justine had said.
“Does Charlie talk to you much about his job?”
Justine moved down the countertop to the gas range and stirred a pot of cheese sauce. “Some. He doesn’t go into details. But Roy and I know something happened on a case a few months back that really affected him.”
“He hasn’t told you what it was?”
Justine shook her head. “Just that everything went wrong, and he felt as if it were all his fault.”
Of all the things Justine had said about her son, this surprised Violet the most. Charlie seemed so self-assured, so confident. The last thing he appeared to be was a man possessed with guilt. She’d rather think a woman was his problem.
“Are you sure your son isn’t troubled over a girlfriend? Or maybe he’s gotten involved with a married woman and doesn’t want you to know about it,” Violet said.
Grimacing, Justine waved her hand through the air. “Oh well, Charlie’s love life is a whole other story. The woman he wanted left him flat. Now he swears up and down...”
Suddenly her words trailed away and she looked at Violet as though something altogether different had struck her mind. Then with a shake of her head, she said, “I really shouldn’t be telling you all this. Charlie wouldn’t like it if he knew I was discussing him with you or anyone. Besides, you have enough problems of your own. And Charlie is going to have to figure his out on his own.”
She motioned for Violet to join her at the gas range. “Have you ever cooked rellenos?”
Violet was glad the woman was going to change the subject. She didn’t want to hear about Charlie’s troubles, or pain or sorrows. It was easier to let herself believe he was the tough, unshakable Ranger, who chased down the bad guys.
Shaking her head, Violet said, “No. My late husband didn’t like Mexican food, so I never tried my hand at cooking it.”
Justine smiled broadly. “Well, I’m no chef. But I can show you a few things.”
A few minutes later the two of them were immersed in frying the long, breaded peppers when a light knock and a voice sounded behind them.
Violet turned to see a young woman about her own age walking into the kitchen carrying a covered plate. She was tall and slender, and her hair was a vibrant shade of red.
“Anna!” Justine exclaimed, then quickly went to her and kissed her cheek. “What are you doing here? I thought you’d already headed back to Santa Fe.”
Smiling, the young woman shook her head. “Not without seeing Charlie first! I couldn’t believe it when Mom told me he was home!” She handed Justine the covered plate. “Mom wanted you to have some of her carrot cake.”
“Chloe actually baked!” Justine exclaimed. “My sister never bakes.”
“I cajoled her into it,” she said, then glanced to Violet who was still trying to tend to the frying peppers. “Hello,” she said amiably. “worry for intruding. I’m Justine’s niece.” With a little laugh; she walked over to Violet.
“Actually I’m her half sister, too. But legally I’m her niece. She’ll tell you the story sometime. Are you here with Charlie?”
This young woman was certainly forthright, but she was equally warm and friendly, and Violet liked her immediately.
“I guess you could say that.”
“This is Violet, Anna. Isn’t she beautiful?”
“Very!” She quickly snatched Violet up in an affectionate hug. “Oh, I’m so glad Charlie has finally found a woman. He’s needed you for a long time!”
Violet’s mouth fell open. “But I—”
“I know, don’t tell me. He hasn’t asked you to marry him or anything. But don’t worry, he will. Charlie’s never brought a woman home with him before. You have to be special!”
Violet turned her openmouthed stare on Justine. The older woman merely laughed.
“Forgive her. She’s like my daughter, Caroline. A hopeless romantic.”
Laughing, Anna kissed Justine’s cheek again, then headed out the back door. “Sorry to dash in and out so quickly but I’ve got to be back in Santa Fe tonight.”
“Charlie’s down at the barn,” Justine told her.
“That’s where I’m headed. See ya!”
The kitchen seemed absurdly quiet after the door shut and the young woman was gone. Then suddenly Justine let out a little squeal and hurried to the deep-fry pot on the gas range.
“The peppers!”
“I’ve been watching them,” Violet assured her. “I think they’re okay.”
With a pair of tongs Justine pulled up one of the peppers from the boiling oil. The breading was a beautiful golden brown. She looked at Violet and smiled. “They’re perfect. I believe I’ve found a cooking partner.”
Charlie was quiet at dinner, but Sam made up for it by reciting everything he’d seen and done down at the barn, including having Anna push him in the wheelbarrow and playing with three dogs.
Violet was immensely relieved to see her son enjoying himself, yet she was also worried. She had no idea what lay ahead of them once they left the Pardee Ranch. But wherever or whatever life they found, she knew it would surely be a letdown to Sam after all this.
The Ranger And The Widow Woman Page 10