by Riana Lucas
“You are right,” I say. Holly looks at me with a shocked expression. “I do have all of these things, and I will never deny them or be sorry that I have them. But I have not always been so fortunate. I was raised by a monster that killed people for fun, instead of the mother that loved me. My one friend I had my entire life was killed by that monster. I was torn from the only life I ever knew and brought to a new one by you. You, who have been raised by a mother who has loved you more than words can express. You, who have friends that have always had your back, even if you didn’t see it. You, who have a family, friends, and a court that have respected and loved you since the day you arrived here. And while you may not have a soul mate, love has been staring you right in the face and for a very long time. If anyone should be jealous, it should be me.” I finish softly as Thorne reaches over the back of the couch to place his hand on Holly’s shoulder.
Her body jerks slightly at the contact, but she does not move away. She just sits there staring at me. After a few moments of utter silence, she finally speaks. Tears begin to run down her face, but she does not wipe them away. “You are right. I have spent my entire life hating you and being jealous of you. I have dreaded the day you would return. When you finally came, I hated you even more. That hatred finally went away, mostly because of Rho. She told me that you needed me. You know that day when she died? She told me that you would be all alone and that you would need us to help you. After seeing what she would sacrifice for you and then hearing her words, I knew that you were not someone I could hate. Her sacrifice only made me more jealous, though. I am so sorry.”
I can hear a few sniffles, letting me know that I am not the only one brought to tears by Holly’s words. Hearing that Rho was still only thinking of me when she was lying there dying is almost too much. Then to know that Holly has been suffering all this time when she should have been realizing how much she has, puts me over the edge. My tears begin to flow freely as I rush over to where Holly is sitting and throw my arms around her. She quickly returns the hug with a fierceness I have never felt from her. “I am so sorry too,” I whisper.
We hug for a moment in quiet until Willow breaks the silence. Her voice is soft and hopeful. “Does this mean you’re going to stay and get the treatment from Rowan?”
“Yes,” Holly whispers almost too softly, but we all hear her answer.
18
Our group finally breaks up, each going their separate way for now.
Rowan decides that Holly should start treatment immediately. He will go tomorrow with Anna, Reed, and me to the Unseelie court where I will introduce him as the new king. But before he does this, he wants to get Holly settled and started on her first transfusion. Of course, Thorne accompanies them. We all offer to go, but she says it is nonsense for us to sit around her bed while she sleeps. Rowan agrees. So Rowan, Anna, Holly, Thorne, and my mother go to the private treatment room my mother has set up for Holly.
Willow is anxious to check on Jessamine’s progress even though Rowan has reassured her that she is doing much better. She said she is not worried about her physically but emotionally. Gideon rolls his eyes as he follows after her.
That leaves Reed and I walking the quiet corridor hand in hand, alone for the first time in a really long while.
I start to feel a little nervous, but Reed quickly puts a stop to it. He tugs me toward him, bends his head down, and softly brushes his lips against mine. “Stop it,” he says.
“Huh?” I ask in confusion, staring at lips only inches from mine.
He chuckles softly, brushes his lips on mine once more, and tugs my hand so that I am walking beside him again. “Stop getting nervous every time we’re alone. It isn’t any different than it was before.”
“Umm, yes it is. You kiss me now. This is so different.” I do not know why his kiss calms me but it does. Talking like this is something I would normally not be able to do, especially with Reed.
“Well, yeah, but how we feel about each other hasn’t changed so the way we act together shouldn’t either. You’re still my best friend, Poppy. I don’t want that to ever change.”
“Me either,” I tell him softly. The earlier conversation with Rowan about ways to break our connection runs through my head again, sending a shiver up my spine. “But things are changing, aren’t they?”
He offers me a crooked smile as we keep walking, to where I am not sure. “They are, but only for the better. You know, I like this new Poppy.”
My eyebrows crinkle at his statement. “What ‘new Poppy’?”
“The more relaxed, less formal one.” He leans closer to me as if he is telling a secret, and it causes me to blush. “I also like that I’m the only one that gets to see it.”
“I’m still the same…I mean…” I blush again, realizing what he is talking about. I was raised by Damien to always be formal and serious, even in a non-formal setting. My speech has always reflected that formalness. Rho used to tease me, telling me how uptight I sounded when I spoke, but it was so ingrained in me. I could not seem to change it. Now, it seems, whenever I am with Reed I am able to let that go. My speech slips and I am able to sound more relaxed. I never thought too much about it before, but it is nice to allow myself to completely relax with someone for the first time ever in my life. To not have to worry about being caught off guard or corrected for any misstep. To be just a normal young fae, free to act however I wish, to be friends with whomever I wish, and to turn down a mission in favor of spending the day doing whatever it is that I want to do.
I catch myself sighing at what used to be whimsical thoughts, dreams to never come true. Another sigh escapes my lips when Reed pulls me through a doorway and leads me out into one of the many hidden Seelie gardens.
Like at the Unseelie court, there are small gardens within the walls of the castle. They are like little secret mini oases, carved out and hidden within the marble walls. Accessible only from within the castle, yet completely outside. I found many of them throughout my time roaming and exploring the court when I first arrived. They were the one thing that seemed so much like the Unseelie court. They made me feel less homesick and more comfortable with where I was. I have never seen this one before.
The walls are covered in green ivy, so much so that I cannot see even one speck of color other than a bright, vibrant green. The ground is covered as well, just as green as the walls. Stepping stones lead from the doorway to the center of the octagon-shaped garden. The stones are staggered and rugged, giving them a more natural look, and lush green grass grows all around them, even in between. The rest of the ground is scattered with every color of flower imaginable. It looks more like a meadow of wildflowers that a garden within a castle. In the very center of the garden, the stepping stones fan out to form a circle. There is a small bench, just big enough for two people to sit on. Next to the bench is a small pond with a water fountain in the center. The sound of the water trickling is calming and tranquil. The most beautiful part of all is that the bench and the pond are surrounded by large flower bushes with small butterflies fluttering around them.
Reed leads me to the empty bench, where we both sit. I look over into the small pond to see colorful fish zipping around, streaking the water like a rainbow. I feel a feather soft touch on my arm. I look over, expecting to see Reed trying to gain my attention, but he is looking down at my arm where a beautiful Blue Morpho butterfly is resting peacefully on my wrist. Its beautiful blue wings, outlined with deep black, flutter slowly up and down as it rests, then for no reason, it flies away. Reed and I both follow its progress as it disappears into the flower bushes. I let out another contented sigh as I sit back onto the bench, leaning a bit toward Reed to rest my side on his. “It is so peaceful, isn’t it?” I say softly, feeling the need to whisper so that I do not disturb this peace.
“Yes, it is,” he whispers back just as softly.
“I feel like it has been forever since I have had any sort of peace.”
“I know what you mean.”
&
nbsp; Reed and I could have this conversation in our minds, but hearing his voice out loud and being able to speak with him so freely gives me another peaceful, contented feeling. So I continue, asking the questions we have both been avoiding but also anticipating. “What happens now?”
“We get married.”
At his words, my body jerks up so violently that I tumble off the bench and fall on the ground. I twist my body quickly enough to land on my butt instead of my face, but I am unable to prevent my foot from splashing into the pond. Now my butt hurts, my leg is soaked, and my heart is pounding in my chest so loudly that I almost don’t hear Reed laughing. But it is hard to miss because he is doing it so loudly. I pull myself up onto my elbows as I pull my dripping foot from the pond and glare at him. He doesn’t even see it because his eyes are closed and he is laughing so hard that he is doubled over, and shaking so hard that he is forced to hold his stomach. I kick him as hard as I can with my dry foot, but it only makes him laugh harder and causes me to almost lose my balance once again.
Wanting to keep from embarrassing myself any further, I pull myself up off the ground with no help whatsoever from the still laughing Reed. I mean, how long can one person laugh like that? He should be done by now!
I stand in front of him, arms crossed over my chest, foot tapping, as I wait not so patiently for him to stop and explain himself.
Reed finally opens his eyes and glances up at me. He tries to compose himself but fails miserably. When I deepen my glare, it only causes him to start laughing again. I let out a loud huff before plopping down on the bench beside him once again, making sure to stay as far away from him as possible. This is finally what gets his attention.
I watch as he struggles to gain his composure once again. I almost laugh at the difficulty he is having, but I stop myself. I have no idea what he found so funny, or why he blurted out something like that, and I definitely have no desire to give in until he explains himself. So instead I just sit there, staring at him with my arms crossed defensively over my chest as I wait for answers.
“Okay, okay. I’m so sorry. It’s just…you should have seen your face.” He chuckles again but is able to rein it in much quicker this time. I do not say anything, just continue to wait. “Okay, for real this time.” He takes a deep breath. “I am so sorry, Poppy. I didn’t mean to startle you or make you fall. Are you okay?”
I answer reluctantly, my mouth barely opening when I do. “Yes.”
“Are you mad?” I can see that he is only a little bit concerned that I may actually be mad at him; he is still very much amused by all of this.
I repeat my previous answer.
“Please don’t be mad. I was only kidding.” He juts out his bottom lip in an attempt to look cute.
I take a much-needed deep breath as I send a quick prayer to the faeries of the past for the patience I seem to be losing. “Why would you joke about something like that?”
The serious tone of my voice sobers him up a bit more. His eyes narrow slightly as he tilts his head just a bit, watching for what I am not sure. “It was really just a joke, Poppy, I didn’t mean to upset you. What am I missing here?”
Seeing his confusion and sincerity, I let out a breath and drop my arms. Truthfully, I am not sure why I am so upset. Originally, the abruptness with which he said it caught me off guard, but now it is the fact that he would joke about something like marriage. It is not something I ever even considered to be a possibility for me, but now Reed has brought it to the very forefront of my thoughts.
I can feel Reed in my head and I quickly block him, not wanting him to get there before I do. I want to understand what I am feeling and explain it to him myself. I don’t want him to figure it out first.
He narrows his eyes when I do this but does not say anything.
“It’s just that I do not think talking about marriage should be done in a joking way. It is a very serious decision that should not be taken lightly.”
“Okay.” He nods his understanding but senses there is more so remains quiet.
“It is not something I have ever thought about, though. It was never to be in my future.” I glance at him quickly but then lower my eyes to look at my hands resting in my lap. “But when you said it, it made me think for the first time…” I trail off, not sure how to say what I am thinking. Unsure of how this is even done.
“Poppy, look at me,” he says. I do. His eyes are soft and loving, all traces of humor completely gone now. “We are young still, and I feel like marriage is really far in our future.” I start to open my mouth to tell him I understand, but he stops me with a quick shake of his head. “But when we are ready, I fully intend to be the one you marry. I love you, more than anything or anyone I have ever loved. You are my best friend, you are my soul mate, and you will be my wife one day.”
“Oh,” is the only word I can manage. At his words, my stomach plummets and my heart almost beats out of my chest. His confidence in us is so strong that I find myself believing what he has said.
“Will that be okay with you?” he asks with a slight smile.
“Yes,” I whisper softly just before Reed pulls me to him and lowers his head to kiss me.
19
I am jolted awake by the sound of my bedroom door crashing open, then my blanket being ripped off me. I jerk up in the bed, blindly reaching for the covers as the cool morning air reaches my skin. My eyes have not even adjusted to the morning light yet, so I have no idea who has so rudely woke me up. But I do not care.
“Give me back my blanket,” I demand groggily.
“No way! You’re going to be late! Now get up so I can help you get ready!” Willow demands with a much too loud and excited voice first thing in the morning.
Reed and I stayed in our quiet garden for a while, talking, hugging, and kissing until much too late. He even asked one of the servants to bring us dinner so we could enjoy a nice quiet picnic together. It was so romantic, but also fun. We relaxed and enjoyed each other’s company, finally getting to know one another before we decided to call it a night. By the time he walked me to my room and we wished each other a good night, it was very late. Much too late for me to be getting up now.
“No, I’m tired. What am I going to be late for anyway? There is nothing going on today.” I know I sound like a whiny child, but I can’t help it. I just want to go back to sleep.
“The wedding, of course,” she announces cheerfully from within my closet.
This succeeds in waking me up completely. My eyes burst open and my body jerks upright in the bed. The blanket is forgotten; now I am searching for Willow and hopefully some answers.
The conversation Reed and I had last night comes rushing back. Reed spoke of us getting married—only as a joke of course—but the words were still said. He told me he loved me and that although we were much too young now, he fully intended to spend the rest of his life by my side. His words and emotions were so heartwarming and special. And although I did not reveal as much of my feelings as he did, I felt the same way and hoped that he understood that.
I thought we were alone and our secrets would be safe within the walls of the garden but apparently not. I know Reed would not tell anyone of what we spoke about last night, so someone else must have heard. Assumptions must have been made and now I am expected to get married to Reed, right now!
I will kill whoever told my mother because I have no doubt that if Reed and I are expected to be married, my mother was told and is now one hundred percent behind this. I wonder if Reed is being told right now as well. I hope he does not think I have come up with this as some sort of ploy to get him to marry me now. I reach out to contact him mentally but hit a brick wall. I cannot reach him and this makes me nervous. Why has he shut me out? Is he angry? He couldn’t possibly think I would arrange something like this, not after how I reacted to his joke last night.
My breathing becomes erratic, and my fingers grip the sheet beneath me as all sorts of horrible scenarios play out in my head. Scenarios like
Reed hating me for trying to force him into something like this, or of Reed actually wanting this and getting angry with me when I do not go through with it, or of the entire Seelie court gathered for a wedding that definitely will not be happening today or for a very long time. No matter what happens, someone will be disappointed.
My attention turns to Willow when she finally comes out of the closet, arms piled high with dresses. Her smiling face turns to a frown when she sees me gasping for air in the middle of my bed. Dropping the clothes on the floor, she rushes over to me.
“Poppy? What’s the matter? Are you okay? Tell me what’s going on!” Her voice is frantic when she reaches my side and climbs onto the bed beside me. Her hands are touching my forehead and my wrist as if she is trying to find an injury. “Poppy? Where are you hurt?” Her concerned voice is what finally pulls me a bit out of my panic.
“W-w-wedding?” My voice is a hoarse whisper as I stutter out the one-word question.
“Yes,” she answers distractedly as she continues to look for some sort of physical explanation for my odd behavior. “Now tell me what is wrong with you, or I’m calling for your mother and Rowan.”
“I’m…I’m…fine,” I force out in between breaths.
“No, you are not. You can’t seem to breathe and your face is deathly pale.”
“Wh…What are you t…talking about? Wh…What w…w…w…” I cannot even get the word out. My breathing, or lack of it actually, is causing me to get light headed. My vision is blurring from lack of oxygen. Willow notices that my condition is getting worse. She pushes me back, forcing me to lie down. I want to fight against her and demand that she give me answers, but I am too weak.