On the other side of Steph sat Rainer and Hakon, and Josephine had just moved into position beside them at the head of the table, seeming content at this stage to simply listen. Drenson, the head of the Academy, was not at the table.
Rainer moved her chair closer to Josephine as she looked towards Gray and me – the two cloaked strangers. Most people had remained oblivious to our entrance, but Rainer had noticed and was enquiring.
Before putting my head back down to maintain my anonymity, I saw Josephine swing a graceful but dismissive hand towards Rainer who, clearly unhappy, moved her chair back to its previous position.
Finally, though I forced myself not to look, my attention drifted to the right, my entire being humming with the effort.
Torture of any description would have been kinder. I took one agonising breath after another, but it didn’t stop it; the distinctive impression of honey lazily trickling its way into my throat and settling over every inch of my body. I could sense the very spot where he stood, could imagine his posture, his eyes, his lips.
Does he sense me? Would he still want me? Would he ask me to stay? Would he hate me and order me to leave? Would he show me the pain in his eyes that my Sight forced on me on those nights I unwittingly travelled to him?
My hands started to shake.
If only I could completely block myself from myself.
The sound of his voice caused me to freeze. ‘You’re all speculating,’ he said – the first words I’d heard directly from his mouth since the night I was strung up to a cross as Phoenix shot arrows into my body and Lincoln sent me all of his power through our soul bond. He’d kept giving it to me until there’d been nothing left. And just before he’d collapsed and I’d closed my eyes, he’d screamed his final words: ‘I’m yours. Always. Always!’
Those words had haunted me ever since.
I could sense him still, on the far side of the room. And hearing his voice, I couldn’t stop myself from looking through the tiny opening in my hood. My eyes did not need to sift, they found him as easily as the sun finds day. He stood with his back to the room, hands in his pockets. Wearing a navy shirt that was tucked in at his waist, he was broader and clearly stronger than ever.
Slowly, he turned and I braced.
But as he faced the room, his eyes did not move in my direction. Not once. And with a broken breath, fraught with emotion, I realised he was oblivious to my presence. I glanced at Gray, who gave my arm a reassuring squeeze. My shields were blocking him.
Another person stood up at the far end of the table and I saw that it was Max. Morgan sat beside him, and beside her, I recognised Mia.
‘Lincoln, it’s the best we have right now. Until Chloe wakes up, at least.’
‘When can we expect that?’ he snapped, spinning his attention towards Salvatore and Zoe. I was shocked to see such harshness coming from him.
Zoe spoke up. ‘She came around two days ago for a few minutes and that was it. She could wake up at any time.’
‘And she said nothing when she woke?’ Lincoln was watching them carefully, as if he knew she was keeping something back.
I held my breath.
Zoe crossed her arms and leaned back in her chair. I couldn’t help but smile a little to see she seemed much the same with her light brown hair – currently with cherry-red ends – and military-style jacket. ‘Just gibberish.’
‘Gibberish?’ he repeated, his tone now flat.
‘Yep,’ Zoe said, popping the ‘p’ casually, though I could tell she was wary of Lincoln’s mood.
He is different.
Steph cleared her throat. ‘Lincoln, we’ve narrowed down the likely possibilities by checking outgoing flights at the time he was at the airport and we’ve had maps drawn up. Also, since he was in one of the domestic terminals he was almost certainly headed somewhere in the States. We’ve set out the most probable options on these grids. I suggest that we put some conductors to work and see if they can scour the areas. Scouts could also start fielding the perimeters for exile activity. You never know, locating a spike in exile presence might lead to something.’
Steph was … wow. I was so proud of her. She’d just taken on a full room of Grigori warriors. She was human and one of the youngest people in the room but where they failed to find direction she had offered it. They were so lucky to have her.
Lincoln, however, took a deep breath and I noticed that he didn’t look at her once, even as he listened.
Finally, he nodded to her. ‘Set it up.’ Then he addressed the room. ‘Spence is one of ours. He’s stood by each and every one of you without hesitation at some point. He’s family.’
My heart clenched.
Lincoln cleared his throat. ‘I’ve heard the speculation, and while nothing will be overlooked, make no mistake: this is a rescue, not a hunt. We bring him home. We do it right. We do it smart. Call in your sources, contacts, allies; anyone you know. He’s out there and someone knows where. You have until nine o’clock tomorrow morning, then we meet back here.’
I straightened as everyone quickly started to file out, leaving Gray and me wedged in a bad spot, making it difficult for a quick escape.
Come on, come on.
I looked up at Gray, who knew I needed to get out. But causing a scene to push through everyone was not a good idea.
‘What now?’ he whispered beside me.
My eyes darted around anxiously but I ignored the flight instinct that was gnawing at me and stood still. ‘Let’s wait for Josephine to get us out of here and take us to Chloe.’
We stayed in the corner. Steph spoke quietly to Salvatore and Zoe. I was tempted to approach her but knew it was smarter to wait until she was alone. None of them had noticed Gray and me yet.
Rainer and Hakon were visibly upset as they kept Josephine back in a hushed conversation.
I edged back into the wall as I watched Lincoln collect his files from the table and then stride towards the door, Mia in step behind him. It struck me how in charge he appeared, and even though his face looked so familiar, barely aged, he seemed somehow older.
He was going to walk right by us. Slowly, trying not to arouse any attention, I turned towards Gray to shield myself even more. But I flinched mid-turn when, from behind, a hand, blazing hot, wrapped tightly around my upper arm. A voice I knew better than my own spoke quietly into my ear from the other side of the silk hood.
‘Would you think me such a fool that you could be here, in this city, this building, this room and me not know about it?’
I swallowed, frozen. I couldn’t turn to face him. I couldn’t lift my head. Even my soul was stunned.
Lincoln didn’t seem to be bothered by our proximity, nor by my failure to respond. His grip only tightened to the point of almost painful. But it wasn’t, it was just … strong and maybe something else. My breath caught.
‘Lincoln!’ Josephine’s sharp voice carried out across the room. ‘I’ll ask you to remove your hand from my guest.’
I felt Lincoln’s body go rigid behind me. He dropped his hand from my arm and spun. I turned too, keeping my hood down to cover my identity from the rest of the room. From beneath, I watched what I could.
‘You brought her here?’ he asked, his voice disbelieving.
I watched Josephine’s patent black high heels move closer as she strode towards us. ‘An invitation was extended,’ she answered smoothly.
I could see Steph’s feet now too, as she moved towards us. I looked up a little to see her face, a picture of concern as she put the pieces together. She knew it was me.
‘And three guesses who she brought with her,’ Lincoln said, his words barely audible.
‘Do you think she has no right? As I understand from the many stories I’ve heard, she saved Spencer’s life once before.’
Lincoln looked down and half laughed, but there was no humour in the action. ‘Yes. Well, whose life hasn’t she saved?’
He spun back towards me. I dropped my head, reeling, and froze in place as his words hit me.<
br />
‘Do what you must to satisfy whatever curiosity brought you here. Stay out of my way. I have people who rely on me and I don’t have the luxury of being able to turn my back on them.’ And with that final barbed comment he stepped out of the room, Mia following silently.
Josephine, noticing I still hadn’t lifted my head, cleared her throat. ‘Zoe and Salvatore, will you please make the necessary arrangements to escort our guest to the infirmary first thing in the morning? If you’ll excuse me for now, I have to confer with the Assembly. Rainer and Hakon, could you please join me?’
I wanted to argue with Josephine, insist on visiting Chloe now, but speaking required more control than I had at the moment.
I could sense Rainer’s reluctance to leave the room. She wanted to be sure it was me beneath the cloak. She’d been my mentor and we’d grown close when I’d been here last. But I couldn’t show her. It was taking everything I had to hold still.
Once they had cleared the room and it was just Salvatore, Zoe and Steph left, Gray nudged my arm. ‘That’s your girl there, isn’t it?’
When I failed to respond, he just nodded as if he understood. He pulled back his hood and spoke to Zoe and Salvatore. ‘Couldn’t show me somewhere I could clean up a little, could you? We had a long flight.’
‘Of course. We’ll show you to the guest bathrooms,’ Salvatore said, in perfect English, grabbing Zoe’s arm and dragging her to the door. Zoe stared at me the whole time, mouth agape.
I remained still.
When the door finally closed, I let out my breath and took a deeper one to replace it. And then my legs gave out.
Steph caught me, falling to the ground with me as I breathed in the lingering honey and absorbed the remains of the first touches of sun I’d felt in two years.
I was strong. I was a warrior. A weapon.
But seeing him, feeling his presence, crushed my heart all over again.
CHaPteR eIgHt
‘Out of suffering have emerged the strongest souls; the most massive characters are seared with scars.’
Kahlil Gibran
‘Breathe, Vi,’ Steph whispered in my ear.
I couldn’t believe it. A few minutes in the same room as him had caused a complete wrecking effect on me. While he had remained just fine.
‘It’s okay. You’re allowed to care,’ Steph continued to soothe.
But that was just the thing. I wasn’t allowed. I’d given up my rights to him. And he’d seemed so … indifferent. And different. He was stronger but also harder. He was a leader now. No doubt a good one, but I couldn’t help but wonder – was he a kind one? The leader I’d always imagined he would be?
Christ, it hurts so much.
I took a few deep breaths and reminded myself of all the reasons I couldn’t storm down the hall, throw myself at him and beg for forgiveness. All the reasons things had to be the way they were. I pushed into my resources and found the switch I had come to rely on for simple survival and shut it all down, feeling my emotions slip away. It was a numbing gift that had come with a warning, but the need for it outweighed any potential negative consequences.
‘I’m okay,’ I said when I was sure I had a handle on things again. I pulled back my hood and gave Steph a small smile. ‘I was just caught off-guard. Hey.’
Steph smiled back. ‘Hey yourself. So, Onyx found you okay?’ She bit her lip nervously.
I nodded. ‘You did the right thing. It’s Spence, Steph. Of course you did.’
She breathed out a sigh of relief and slumped a little beside me while I took another moment to pull myself together. ‘Please don’t tell everyone I’m here yet. I just … I can’t face all the questions about … everything.’
‘You don’t need to ask. I’ve always kept your confidence. I always will.’
I reached over and pulled her into a hug. ‘I know. And I love you for it.’
‘Ditto,’ she said, hugging me back. ‘And at least we get to see each other. Maybe when we have Spence back and we’ve all taken turns kicking his ass we can go over my wedding plans. I picked up your dress the other day,’ she said, her eyes twinkling with excitement.
I hid my cringe, not wanting to face the wedding issue yet. Or the fact that I was going to have to stand on the other side of the aisle looking at Lincoln while Steph married the man of her dreams.
I smiled. ‘Let’s just get Spence back first.’
She nodded, happy enough to let it go for now. ‘Agreed. Why don’t we get your rooms organised and I’ll take you to see Chloe first thing. I figure the sooner the better since Lincoln won’t take long to get a clear mind and figure out that will be your next move.’
I blinked. ‘He seemed pretty clear-headed when he was speaking to me,’ I said.
She scoffed. ‘Oh, please. A hundred bucks says he’s bent over hyperventilating somewhere right now just like you.’
She seemed so sure. I, however, wasn’t.
‘Anyway,’ Steph went on, ‘he’s going to flip when he finds out Zoe and Sal didn’t tell him everything Chloe said, but that’s Josephine’s problem to deal with. At least I know he won’t bother me.’
‘Why?’ I asked, knowing I probably shouldn’t.
She shrugged. ‘He’s always known I’ve been in touch with you. He made things pretty intense in the first few months, as you know. He and Salvatore had a run-in. Eventually they worked it out and made up, but … he’s never been able to be normal around me since. I think he believes that if I’d just told him in the beginning where you were he would’ve … you know, fixed things.’
I shook my head. ‘He wouldn’t have, Steph. He would’ve just wound up more hurt. Me too. You did the right thing and I’m so sorry I left you to deal with this stuff,’ I said, realising sadly that after we brought Spence back it might really be time for me to cut ties completely. I couldn’t keep putting her in this position.
Steph watched me as if she could see my thoughts. ‘When the alternative was never speaking to you again, it really wasn’t a high price to pay,’ she said sternly. ‘And anyway, if I hadn’t known where you were, Onyx would never have found you. It all worked out. Lincoln’s just … Lincoln.’
‘I suppose,’ I mumbled. But I was feeling better. Back in control. I stood up, pulling Steph after me, keen to close this conversation. I took the time to reposition my hood. People might already be gossiping that I was there but I wasn’t ready to confirm it yet. ‘No chance of seeing Chloe tonight?’ I asked.
Steph shook her head. ‘The infirmary’s closed for the night. Besides, you look like you could do with some sleep.’
Despite the fact even my fingernails were exhausted I didn’t think I’d be getting much sleep tonight. ‘Do you know where Onyx is staying? He said Gray and I could stay with him.’
She smiled. ‘You don’t know?’
My eyebrows crinkled and her smile broadened. ‘Onyx and Dapper own Ascension now.’
The bar hidden within one of the pillars of Brooklyn Bridge was closed for the night by the time Gray and I let ourselves in using the keypad code Steph had given us.
I barely made it three steps into the main bar before Dapper was in front of me sweeping me into a huge hug. A number of people – obviously staff cleaning up after the night – were staring wide-eyed and I knew it wasn’t at me. Dapper wasn’t exactly a cuddler.
I laughed out loud, surprising myself. ‘I’ve missed you, too.’
He seemed to remember himself and stood back, clearing his throat. ‘Yeah, well. People round here never stop talking about you,’ he said with a tinge of his old gruffness. ‘Makes it hard to forget all the trouble you cause.’
I found it hard to forget, too.
‘When did you come to New York? What happened to Hades?’ I asked. His old bar back in our home city had been his pride and joy.
Dapper grabbed my bag and started to walk me towards a narrow staircase behind the bar. ‘Come on, let’s get you settled in.’
Gray and I followed Dappe
r past the bar, where Onyx was sitting with a large glass of something toxic-looking in front of him. He raised it as we went by.
‘Anyone tried to kill you?’ he asked.
I rolled my eyes. ‘Not yet,’ I replied.
He shrugged. ‘Blow anything up?’
‘Not yet,’ I said again, fighting the urge to smile.
‘Eh. Still early days.’
I shook my head and kept walking.
‘Think I might stay down here for a drink,’ Gray said, eyeing the pretty blonde bartender as he pulled out the stool beside Onyx and dumped his bag.
‘Suit yourself, but be ready to go first thing,’ I said, knowing I probably wouldn’t see him again before morning.
He gave me a salute and picked up the drink Onyx poured him.
‘So?’ I tried again, walking into the apartment with Dapper. ‘Why the move?’
Dapper flicked on lights as we walked through. The apartment was different from his one above Hades, but it once again showcased his outstanding flair for interior design and love of Italian furniture.
‘I’ve still got Hades,’ Dapper said, taking my bag into a stylish bedroom, decorated in a cream palette with splashes of chocolate and lime. He opened a door to show me the neat en suite bathroom and took two folded white towels from the cabinet below the sink, resting them on the vanity unit.
‘I’ll head back there one day. But I decided to give New York a try for a while. Someone had to watch the girl,’ he continued. ‘Plus, she tried to steal half my books when she left. I figured it was easier to bring the whole lot.’
I smiled to hear Dapper speak so lovingly of Steph. ‘So, you just bought Ascension?’
‘I saw the opportunity.’ He winked. ‘Near-immortal regulars who can seriously hold their liquor make for good repeat business.’ Then, before he seemed to realise it, he had enveloped me in another hug. ‘It’s good to see you, kid. Things just aren’t the same.’
I wriggled free of Dapper’s arms, overwhelmed by the emotion behind his words but also annoyed with myself for my reaction.
Get a grip, Vi.
Dapper gave a small nod as if he understood. ‘You need anything, just yell out. Kitchen’s down the hall if you’re hungry, though don’t get your hopes up. Onyx’s idea of shopping consists of bourbon and Pop-Tarts.’
Empower: Violet Eden Chapters: Book Five Page 7