A professor recommended me to an agency in Hollywood that represents PTs. My first client was an action star who needed to get back on a movie set quickly.” He shrugged. “We worked well together after I nearly walked out when he didn’t follow instructions.
“He passed the word, and I started getting calls from other actors and stuntmen and stuntwomen. Quick recoveries were essential. It’s just a small percentage of my work although the most lucrative. It permits me to do things like Josh’s New Beginnings.”
They reached the inn. She wished she could have doubled the distance.
“Thanks for the guided tour,” he said, as if there hadn’t been a magical moment. As if, instead, nothing happened.
Something had happened. For her, at least. Her world had turned upside down. And she had to know if it affected him, as well.
“Have you ever thought about settling in a place like Covenant Falls?” she persisted. “I know there’s not much here. Few jobs. Few conveniences. You have to drive a hundred miles to a theater or a department store. We’re just now attracting a few small businesses, the largest being a specialty dog bed company with ten employees. It’s mostly horse and cattle country. But it’s a good place to hang your hat in between jobs.”
He shrugged. “It’s not a lack of conveniences that encourages me to move on. A big city doesn’t attract me, either. Maybe it’s because I learned it’s foolish to think anything lasts.”
“That’s cynical,” she said sadly.
“No, it’s not. It’s practical.”
“Don’t feel, and you don’t get hurt? Is that it?” she asked. “Don’t you miss out on a lot, then?”
He didn’t answer, just put his hand on Hobo’s body and lifted him out of the car and onto the ground.
She stepped out, too. She wanted to check the desk since she was here, but she didn’t want him to leave for his room, either. “What are you going to do with Hobo?” she asked. “He adores you.”
He turned to her. “Do you ever stop trying to save the world?”
His question was harsh as was his tone. “Not my corner of it,” she shot back.
“Dammit, Susan, I can’t stay! That’s not what I do or who I am. And it will be unfair to Hobo. He deserves a real home.”
“And you don’t?” she retorted. Her heart sank. For a few magical moments, she’d felt a strong connection with him. More than a connection. Something really fine. Even grand. Something she had never felt before. She certainly hadn’t felt it with Richard. That had been, admittedly, a young woman’s inexperience. She hadn’t felt a quarter of what she felt for Ross in a few days: the naturalness, the shared appreciation of so many things, the emotions he’d invoked during the first kiss and then their kisses tonight. They had been fireworks-worthy.
But he’d made it clear from the beginning. His freedom came first. She sensed she hadn’t heard the real reason yet. A lot of moves as a kid just didn’t justify it. A lot of kids experienced that.
She wasn’t being fair and she knew it. He had put everyone on notice that this was a short stop, but she’d felt that maybe something changed tonight. Darn it, why had she pushed it? Maybe because she thought something was happening between them. Maybe because they’d shared a moment of intimacy. It had meant something to her. Apparently not to him.
“You could do a lot if you stayed throughout the program,” she said sadly. She hated begging but something was wrong here. In the thirty minutes since they’d left the falls, he’d changed. He was cool now. “And what about Hobo?” she asked.
Hobo looked up at him with a doleful expression.
“Have you trained that dog?” he asked suspiciously.
“No, he’s just smarter than you.”
“That wouldn’t be hard.” His voice softened. “I should go inside. It’s late. You need some sleep if you’re going to make the sunrise run.”
“What about you?” she asked.
“I have some work to do.”
He appeared more relaxed now that the conversation had changed. There were a couple of times today he’d lowered his guard. She wanted to know more about him, a lot more, but it was as if a traffic signal suddenly turned red and was stuck on it.
“You’re right,” she said with a challenge in her voice. “About getting some sleep.”
He nodded, picked up Hobo and walked away. He looked back at her, and she was startled to see something like pain carved in his face. But before she was sure, he turned and headed for the door of the inn.
* * *
Ross turned, watched her drive away, then walked to his room. The comforter was folded back. There was a plate of cookies next to the bed. He shared one of them with Hobo.
“What am I going to do with you?” he asked. In just a few days, the dog was beginning to fill out. He wouldn’t fit in the little compartment on the bike much longer.
Any owner would be better than he would. He’d hurt Susan, and no one deserved that less than her. But he was beginning to care for her far too much. He’d wanted her in the worst way at the falls. If the kids hadn’t shown up, he might have done something they would both regret.
He told himself he was an idiot for letting it get so far, but after her disclosure about that son of a bitch ex, he’d wanted to hold her, make love to her and tell her how stupid that guy was.
Instead, he’d rebuffed her to protect his own guarded walls. Making it worse was doing it after she’d poured out what had obviously been very painful.
Why can’t I come to terms with my past when she has?
How do you tell someone that your father hanged himself and left his son to find him, that your mother then drank herself to death and left him to bounce between relatives who didn’t want him and threw his father’s death in his face? He was weak. He didn’t care about you.
He’d learned how to be alone, to take care of himself, not to expect anything from anyone. It was why he was a traveling PT. He could loan out his heart on a short-term basis without fearing loss.
He filled Hobo’s water dish and fed him a dish of dry dog food. The dog gobbled it up.
Ross watched Hobo eat greedily as he always did, then the dog curled up as close to him as possible. After several moments, Ross took a hot shower. For the second time in two days, he wished he had a bottle of bourbon.
When he finished, he sat in a comfortable armchair and wrote notes about his sessions with the vets. He was getting to know which ones were married, which ones were on the verge of divorce, which ones were fighting to maintain sobriety. They were coming together as a group. Helping each other. Encouraging each other. Hopefully developing long-term support relationships.
It was after midnight when he finally turned out the light. Problem was he continued to see Susan as she stood in the mist of the waterfall with that contagious smile. He still felt the magic of the embrace, the softness of her lips. She threw everything she had into whatever she did, including that kiss.
He finally rose, put on his jeans and T-shirt and headed for the door, leaving Hobo sleeping in the room. He rolled his bike out to the street so he wouldn’t wake anyone. Then he mounted it. He needed to feel the wind wrap around him, the illusion of freedom it usually brought him. He rode out onto the street and then headed in the direction Susan had taken earlier.
He reached the Rusty Nail. There were several vehicles parked in front. He drove into the parking lot, parked the bike and walked into the bar. One glass of bourbon to erase the image of Susan’s face when he walked away from her.
He went to the bar and selected a stool. In seconds a middle-aged guy in jeans and a pullover approached him. When he reached out a hand, Ross noticed a military tattoo on his arm.
“I’m Johnny Kay,” he said. “You must be Ross Taylor,” he said.
“How did you know?” Ross asked.
“News gets around fast. Hear
d about a big guy on a Harley helping out at New Beginnings. Not many people fit that description, at least not in Covenant Falls. I own this place and your first drink is on the house. Offer good for all current servicemen and vets. What will you have?”
“I was thinking bourbon but I’ll settle for a beer since I’m on my bike. Do you have a good local one?”
“Sure do.”
Ross nodded. “You’re a veteran yourself,” he noted. The tattoo was a giveaway.
“Iraq at the beginning,” Johnny said as he took a can from a cooler and placed it in front of Ross.
The can was frosty, just as Ross liked it. He took a long swallow.
“How long you going to be here?” Johnny asked him.
“Two weeks.”
“Hungry? We have good local beef.”
“I had dinner at Josh’s home.”
Johnny just nodded. “He’s a good guy and a good griller. He’s really changed Covenant Falls. We’re actually growing now.”
“So I heard.”
“How do you like the inn?”
“I haven’t spent much time there,” Ross replied. He would just as soon not think of the inn at the moment.
There must have been something in his tone because Johnny Kay just nodded. “Let me know if you want anything,” he said and left.
There must be something to dislike about Covenant Falls but at the moment Ross couldn’t think what it might be. It had a good bar, a mercantile with everything one could need, mountains, its own falls, even a rainbow apparently. Then he found its fault. It was too perfect. Who really wanted perfection?
He finished the beer, gave the owner a salute and wandered outside. For some reason his dissatisfaction with perfection grew stronger. He knew it had something to do with Susan and the way he’d messed everything up. He’d consciously hurt the last person in the world who deserved it.
He mounted the Harley and started out of the parking lot, barely missing a police car rounding a curve and turning in. His bike went down as both he and the police car swerved to avoid a crash.
He landed on the pavement, the bike on his leg.
The officer stepped out of the police car, hurried over to him and lifted the bike off his leg, then leaned down. “Ross?”
“Afraid so,” Ross replied.
“Hell of a way to meet again,” Covenant Falls Police Chief Clint Morgan said. “ How bad is it? Can you stand?”
“I think so,” Ross said, although his knee was hurting. He was pretty sure, though, that nothing was broken except his skin, which was bleeding profusely.
“Don’t you want that leg checked?”
“I’m a former medic and believe me I know when something’s broken or torn. My pride’s taken a hit, though.”
Clint disappeared to the back of the car and returned with a first aid kit. Just then Johnny appeared from the bar. “Someone said...” He stopped, saw the blood, “My God...”
“Not that bad,” Ross said as he bit back a curse. “I could use a couple of towels, though.” As Johnny headed back inside, Ross turned toward Clint. “How long do you think before the entire town knows?” he asked.
“Ten minutes, maybe five,” Clint said. “Drove me nuts in the beginning.”
Ross winced. “I had one beer.”
“I can testify to that,” Johnny said, who was back at his side with two wet towels.
“And some wine for dinner,” Ross added honestly.
“Hell, that was hours ago,” Clint said.
Damn. The police chief even knew about his dinner.
“Don’t worry,” Clint said. “That curve is dangerous. Too many accidents. I was just checking on Johnny before I went home. I didn’t expect a Harley pulling out. I judge neither of us is responsible.”
In a matter of seconds, cloth was cut away from the leg and Johnny’s towels had soaked up the blood. Skin had been shaved off several spots and there was one long cut. The police chief treated it with antiseptic and bandaged it. The other occupants of the saloon wandered out and watched with interest and alcoholic sympathy. Ross groaned. No telling what the rumors would contain tomorrow.
His cell rang. It was Josh. “Are you okay?”
Damn, the grapevine was even quicker than he believed. “All but my pride,” he admitted.
“Need anything?”
“Nope, but thanks.”
“Does the bike need a pickup?”
“The bike’s not damaged except for a few more scratches and dents.”
“Okay, but I’ll follow you to the inn. Jubal will have my neck if anything happens to you.”
Ross hobbled to his room after arriving at the inn. He was as lame as Hobo, who was waiting at the door of his room and made small grunts of either complaint or happiness when Ross stepped inside. He half expected Susan to appear but she didn’t. He took a shower, then redressed the abrasions with items from his first aid kit.
It was after 1:00 a.m. by the time got in bed. He needed to be up at five thirty at the latest to meet the vets for the morning run.
He turned out the light but he couldn’t stop rerunning the evening and night over and over again in his mind. He’d treated Susan badly. He knew nothing about healthy relationships. His military friendships were strong because his comrades lived together and fought together for years. But outside, there had been few.
He looked ahead and the future suddenly looked bleak. If he’d not swerved in time tonight, he might have died, and what would he leave behind? He wouldn’t have loved or been loved. Never known what it was to father a child or, like Josh, bring one up. He had only to look at Josh and Jubal to know that each day they knew love and caring.
All he’d looked forward to was a ride up the coast. Somehow it didn’t seem a very good substitute for what was being offered to him here: friends, a piece of property of his own and a woman that brightened every day just by being there.
He couldn’t sleep. The realization that he may have wasted much of his life because of fear was excruciating. He’d never considered himself a coward but that’s exactly what he had become.
He wondered whether he had completely destroyed the relationship with Susan in the false cause of saving her from him. It had been, instead, pure selfishness on his part.
The thought haunted him until the inn clock told him it was 5:00 a.m.
The shallow wounds were still leaking blood and he replaced bandages, then, instead of his running shorts, selected his jeans to cover them. After drinking two cups of coffee and scarfing down three rolls from the lobby, he and Hobo took off on his bike. It had dents but it was running.
The guys were already waiting in front of the bunkhouse when he arrived. They were all wearing their cowboy hats. He didn’t see Susan and his heart dropped.
Riley approached him shyly, then handed him a handsome cowboy hat. It was far grander than the ones passed out on Sunday.
“We voted,” Riley said, “and decided you needed one if you’re leading the pack. All the guys pitched in and went to the General Store last night. They opened it just for us.” He sounded very impressed about that.
Riley hesitated, glanced at the others, then added, “We thought you should know we hope you stay. That ole bike of yours isn’t nearly as good as Cajun.” He paused, then added shyly, “We kinda like the idea of you being here when we come back for visits.”
“Yep,” Danny added when Ross raised an eyebrow. “We all heard that Jubal wants you to stay, and we want you to know we hope you do. You and Hobo. Seems like you belong here.” He looked a little embarrassed.
“That goes for all of us,” another chipped in.
Ross was speechless. And moved. More than at any time he could remember. He knew most of these vets had little money. The hat was great but what really touched him was they meant what they said. He swallowed hard and fin
ally managed to say, “Thank you.” He placed that hat on his head. It fit perfectly. Then, in a stronger voice, he added, “Let’s move.”
As they started their run, he looked around for Susan.
She wasn’t there.
Chapter 14
Susan went directly to the inn the next morning. She knew Ross wouldn’t be there. He would be at the ranch.
She’d decided not to join the run this morning and instead attend to things at the inn.
She debated fleeing Covenant Falls and driving up to Denver to peddle stories on Covenant Falls’ gold mine history, but then decided that was cowardly. Darned if she was going to let Ross Taylor affect what she did or did not do.
She was still stunned from last night and his curt rejection. What had happened to the man to whom she’d poured out her heart? To whom she’d revealed the worst parts of her life?
He’d just walked away.
She’d been sleepless, trying to understand how and why he’d turned from hot to cold, from a passionate kiss to indifference, even impatience. Do you ever stop trying to save the world? His words kept repeating themselves, along with the curtness in his voice.
She’d spent a long time in the tub last night but she couldn’t concentrate on a book or anything else. A few tears, though, wandered down her cheek.
She’d finally given up trying to read and went to bed. Vagabond seemed to understand and with a rare show of affection cuddled up next to her in bed.
At dawn she dressed, turned on the television, brewed coffee and watched the depressing morning news. When she was sure he would have left the inn, she drove over there. Sure enough, his bike was gone.
Janet looked up from the desk when she entered. “I thought you would be at Jubal’s ranch.”
“I decided to catch up on inn business,” she said. “I’ve been delinquent and putting too much on you guys.”
“Not at all. Mark and I are both grateful for the overtime.” She leaned over the desk. “Did you hear about Mr. Taylor?”
“Hear what?”
“He was in an accident last night. Ran into Clint’s police car at the Rusty Nail.”
Home on the Ranch: Colorado Cowboy Page 17