by Tessa Vidal
“Can we talk about it in the car? I just want to leave, but I don’t want anyone to know what’s wrong.”
“In that case...” Dylan linked her elbow with mine and waved at someone across the room. “I’m sorry for this, but we’ll need to take the long way home. Stay with me, sweetie, and we’ll make an exit that keeps you looking good to everyone else.”
Even though it seemed like I was drowning, Dylan’s presence anchored me somewhat. Together, we made our way back through the crowd. She introduced me to people on our way toward the door, and I did my best not to throw up.
Chapter Eighteen
Dylan
Sara asked for time to think, which left me to go home alone without my date. So much for getting under that beautiful skirt of hers. Frazzled and frustrated, I drowned my sorrows in cooking all weekend. I tried to tempt Sara out of her apartment by texting her photos of pasta, taquitos, and more, but she declined every invitation.
I want to think about this a little more before we get together again, she texted. I promise, we aren’t breaking up, but I need a little space for the moment.
No problem. Okay, there was a problem, but I wasn’t about to tell her that. Just sayin’, when life hands you lemons, make pasta limone.
That was all I said to her. I would respect her need for space. But I was done respecting the people who’d made her feel she needed it. We both deserved better.
By the time Monday rolled around, I wasn’t just understanding and accepting that Sara needed time to process how to move forward. I was pissed off. Her quiet time gave me quiet time, and I came to one conclusion: No one seemed to give me the same things I was giving Sara. I loved her and if other people were going to treat her like shit, then they weren’t people I needed in my life.
If there was anything I’d learned from my parents’ callous treatment of me, it was that life was too short to let the wrong people into my heart. Today, I was going to kick all of them out of it.
“Good morning, Dylan,” my editor’s assistant said as I stormed past her desk and into the boss’s office. I didn’t mean to be rude to her – she hadn’t done anything wrong – but my heart was racing, my body heated all over as my anger finally got the better of me.
“You know, I finally found the best person in the world and I am not going to let you ruin that,” I announced as I stepped into my boss’s office.
The editor-in-chief turned to me, her expression neutral. “If you feel the need to come in here and tell me, maybe you aren’t so sure of that.”
“No, I’m very sure of everything, surer than I’ve ever been in my entire life. But if you feel the need to accuse my girlfriend of having intentions to sabotage us, you’re the one who isn’t so sure of your position in this world. I don’t need you to approve of our relationship.”
She leaned back in her chair and pursed her lips for a moment. “Well, if my opinion bothers you, maybe it’s not such a great relationship.”
I sucked in a breath, my chest tight, and nodded. “Yeah. You’re right about that. There is a relationship that isn’t working for me at all and I think it’s time to get out of it for good.”
****
Sara
AFTER I ARRIVED AT work, I closed myself in my office and sent Dylan a text. I’ve come to an important decision. Can we do lunch?
That sounded ominous and I nibbled at my lower lip, hoping she didn’t suspect the worst. But with every passing minute that I didn’t hear from her, my nerves ratcheted up a notch. I called Paige and, as soon as she answered the phone, I blurted out, “I think Dylan’s over me.”
She made a strange, sad little sound, and said, “What makes you think that?”
“I asked her for space and she kept in touch all weekend, but now she’s not answering.”
Paige drew in a breath that made the phone crackle. “I don’t know what to tell you, hon, except that maybe she couldn’t change her ways after all.”
“That’s a good start. Tell me what you told me when we met, that she’s trouble, that I don’t want to give involved with her.” Anything to ease my frantic mind and help me decide what I had to do now. “Tell me that when the going gets tough, it was inevitable that she would go back to easy one-night stands, that she doesn’t ‘do’ relationships.”
“Oh, Sara. I can’t tell you what I don’t know. That’s the old Dylan, but she’s changed with you. Instead of freaking out, I want you to calm down. How long’s it been since you last messaged her?”
I glanced at my phone. “About an hour.”
“That’s a blip. She could be in a meeting. You have meetings every Monday morning.”
“I know, I know.” I wished I could sound less worked up, but that seemed impossible, given the circumstances. Maybe this was what I got for thinking I could be happy, for allowing someone else besides myself to have any power over that.
“Then stop.” Paige’s voice had taken on a no-nonsense tone. “If I’m wrong, I owe you. But if I’m right, well... I’ve got to go. So, do yourself a favor and stop freaking out.”
Easier said than done, but as I ended the call, I resolved to at least try.
Two hours later and no closer to stopping said freak out, I shouldered my purse. An early lunch might help, except I couldn’t think about food at a time like this. My stomach was in knots and I doubted it wanted anything else in it.
I stepped out of my office and a slender column of black caught my eye.
Dylan.
She’d also just stepped out of an office, my editor-in-chief’s. And they were shaking hands.
As if they knew I was watching, they both turned to me. My boss winked, returned to her office, and shut the door. I knew my mouth had fallen open, so I managed to close it again and approached Dylan. She met me halfway and put up her hand.
“I quit,” she said without preamble. “Not us, but at the magazine. There was too much pressure for me to give up the one thing that matters in my life.”
“Which is?” I held my breath, even though I already knew the answer.
She pressed the tip of her index finger to the end of my nose and said, “You, of course. I can’t stay in a job with people who are going to treat me and my girlfriend like crap.”
That made sense, but it still left more questions. “So, what are you doing here?” I kept my focus on her, even though my spine tingled with awareness. Everyone was watching us, yet again. This couldn’t bode well. Did she want me to quit, too?
“Well, I can’t go through life without a job, so I thought Hearst might be hiring.”
It took me a moment to process her words, how she’d jumped ship from the biggest magazine in the industry to come... here. Here. Here, to me. Tears sprang to my eyes and no amount of blinking stopped them from falling.
“You’re going to be working here? What if... I don’t know, what if we break up or something? Things will get awkward. I mean, mega-awkward, like avoidance-dance-in-the-halls awkward.”
“Oh, Sara.” Dylan reached up and traced her fingers along my hairline. “Breaking up is the last thing on my mind. If it was even a consideration, I wouldn’t be here with you, would I?”
No. No, she wouldn’t. I leaned into her kiss, aware of the cheers from the offices and desks around us. Aware, but not caring, because all that mattered was here in my arms.
Chapter Nineteen
Dylan
It was the perfect date for our first anniversary one year later. I brought her back to the scene of that first picnic together, where we’d wanted each other so much, but hadn’t given in to our desires.
As always, Sara was stunning in a long, goddess-like maxi dress that made me wonder how anyone could think she was anything less than perfect. Extra inches or not, she was beautiful, inside and out. And she was mine
We sat on the blanket, talking, eating, drinking – everything an intimate picnic for two should involve. Until she finally let me do the thing I’d been wanting to do since we met.
S
he lay back there under the sky and surrounded by trees, while I pushed the dress up along her legs, over her thighs, and to her hips. The sight of Sara bared to me under the open sky left me breathless. “You’re not wearing any underwear.”
A blush rose to Sara’s cheeks, but she tossed her hair and smiled down at me. “It’s just something new I wanted to try. What do you think?”
In response, I lowered my face between her thighs and drew my tongue along her folds in one long, wet lick. She released a soft “Ooh” followed by moans of pleasure. By the time I had her shaking with need, her noises had gotten far louder. If someone decided to take a walk on the lovely rural lane that day, they would have heard her. When she orgasmed on one final note, I smiled with satisfaction.
After tucking her dress back into place around her, I took her hand so she could sit up. “Best picnic ever,” I declared.
“I agree.” She picked up her water bottle and took a long drink. Long enough for me to reach into the satchel I’d brought with me and take out the most important thing of all.
The velvety box clutched in my hand made my throat go dry. I held it against my side and reached for my water. No doubt Sara would get suspicious if I took too long to say something. I was far too aware of my own awkwardness as I swallowed and then set the water bottle aside. All my life, I’d been able to pretend I was confident. Not this time, though. Even after a year together, I couldn’t predict my girlfriend’s reaction to the question burning at my chest.
“Sara,” I started, “there’s something I want to say to you.”
“Okay.” She looked at me with those innocent eyes of hers and I wanted to make love to her again. But I rolled my shoulders and focused on the texture of the box rubbing against the palm of my hand.
I cleared my throat, the one nervous thing I’d always tried to avoid doing in both my work and personal lives. There was no helping it in this situation.
“One of the things I love about you is that I can be myself,” I told her. “I can show you my anxiety or a lack of confidence, and you don’t judge me. If anything, you love me more for being human and you don’t ask me to be more than that.”
She nodded and folded her hands in her lap. Maybe she had an inkling of where this was going. Maybe not. All I knew was that I had to carry on until I got to my point.
“You’re the person I want to spend my days and nights with, for as long as we love each other. So, I have to ask you if you will marry me.” I held the box up between us and tipped back the lid to reveal the ring inside.
Everything about the platinum band with the square-cut diamond on top made me think of Sara, how her beauty was so simple and elegant at the same time. She didn’t have to be a show-off to get people to notice her, but she stood out, nonetheless.
Her hands flew to her mouth and she let out a little squeak. Tears filled her eyes, shimmering until they fell down her cheeks. This was exactly the reaction I’d hoped for and I could finally breathe again.
“Yes,” she rasped. She extended her hand for the ring, and I hoped it would fit. I’d done my best to work with Paige behind Sara’s back to find something she would love. When the band slipped over her finger effortlessly, it was my turn to let out a tear. I pulled her into my arms and kissed the top of her golden-blonde hair.
I loved the idea of merging our past and future into a shared, almost tangible thing. Of course, it wasn’t really, because all of that came from inside us. Something only the two of us knew about, our own personal journeys of healing and love and forgiveness.
In my life, I’d always taken what I wanted after what I needed most was taken from me. Now, I was giving more, and that was what mattered. I wasn’t doing it because I thought I should, but because I wanted to. Neither life nor love were easy. It wasn’t a straight path, but a curved one that sometimes brought us to a crossroads. Both Sara and I had to navigate on our own until we found each other.
Now, we could navigate those curves together.
The End
About the Author
Tessa is a feel-young woman in her fifties who lives for romance. A church secretary by day, Tessa writes romantic tales of love at night about women defying boundaries and forging relationships that stand the test of time.
She is the author of the Cherished Choices series:
Choices
Committed
Crave
Caught