‘What was that?’
‘I’m sorry,’ I muttered, not letting her go.
She smiled gently. ‘No, I mean—’
‘Taurus!’
Someone banged on the door. We sprung apart. Kerry jumped out of the bed and clambered to her feet. She flung the door open as I tucked the cover back over myself.
Aries stood in the doorway. His face was red and his hands were clenched at his side. ‘I think you’ve failed to tell us something.’
My head was spinning from the use of drugs, lust and now Aries’ forceful power.
‘He will tell you when he feels better,’ Kerry said, going to close the door.
Aries slapped his hand on the wood, preventing her from shutting him out. He looked at me. His eyes zoned in on my gaze and held it. He shook his head once and turned away. The door closed behind him. He was disappointed. I could see it in his face. I had gone behind their backs, but how much did he know?
‘Everything’s messed up,’ I said as Kerry wiped her face and sat on the bed opposite me.
Her cheeks glowed when I smiled at her. The kiss had blown me away. It had never been like that with Sophie.
‘I feel like I’ve taken advantage,’ Kerry whispered.
She flicked her hair over her shoulder as it fell forward. Her eyes were lowered, avoiding contact with mine. I didn’t blame her.
‘No. It was me that took advantage.’
My head started to pound. It was a common symptom I had been having for the last three days. Detoxing was not fun. I closed my eyes briefly. When I opened them again, Kerry had moved to crouch beside the bed.
‘You did not take advantage of me. You’re the one that only lost his girlfriend a couple of weeks ago.’
I laughed. Once I started, I couldn’t stop. I held my stomach as she knelt there, watching me.
‘I’m sorry.’ I reached out and took her hand in mine.
Her frowned lifted when I kissed the crease on her palm. ‘Sophie is…would have been…fine with this.’
I let her go. She shook her head as she absently rubbed the spot my lips had just touched.
‘You should go now. I promise I’m not going anywhere. Send Cancer if you’re that worried.’
I needed to be alone. My dreams had been hectic. Even more so since coming off drugs and alcohol. I had to get my head clear and process all that I had learnt about Nick.
‘Okay. I’ll go,’ Kerry said.
She ran a hand over the bristles of hair on my head. My eyes closed at the blissful feeling. Her touch soothed my pounding headache.
‘Thank you. For everything,’ I whispered, capturing her hand as she went to pull away.
When I opened my eyes she was smiling down at me with a dreamy look in her eyes. Her blonde hair was hanging forward, brushing against her shoulders. The image of her was a confirmation of my vision.
‘I like your bracelet,’ she said, glancing at my wrist.
If I needed any more proof, her timing couldn’t have been better.
‘This old thing? I’d rip it off if I could,’ I stated.
She laughed as she squeezed my hand and left me to my shivers.
The events of my dreams were a jumble in my mind. If I had deduced the information correctly, Nick had been an ordinary human until he had been fooled by a man and heartbroken by the woman. He decided that love was awful and he was the avenger for everyone. He had killed people to prevent them being in relationships with the people they loved. He met a crazy old man that helped him confirm that what he did was okay. He was told about evil. His psychotic brain picked up on the excuse and when he met us, he had declared war.
My siblings and I were warriors of love. We constantly came back to earth to fall in love. By doing that, we showed others that true love existed. It seemed like a very basic plan to me. Most humans came to earth, fell in love and then died. What made us any different?
‘Taurus?’
Cancer knocked on the door. When I didn’t reply, she came in and sat on the end of my bed. My head was still hurting, but I wasn’t going to moan.
‘Kerry looked rather flushed when she left.’ Cancer winked at me.
I rolled my eyes as I pushed myself up into a sit. I cradled my head and leant against the wall.
‘Still suffering?’
She had popped in over the last few days to check on my progress. It seemed like the worst was over. I was still shaking and struggling to sleep. The headaches lingered, but I could now talk to other people, which was positive.
‘What does Aries know?’ I asked.
My old bong sat on the shelf above my head. I stuck out my bottom lip when I realised that I would never use it again. The feeling of nostalgia didn’t last long. In fact, it made me lighter, even as I mourned. It wasn’t worth it. I couldn’t see past the next few days yet, but my life would be better for not being an addict.
‘He knows that Matt spoke to you. Someone saw you both outside before everything happened. I don’t know who grassed you up.’
Cancer picked at the blue varnish on her nails. The flecks bounced off her and onto my cover.
‘I’m going to tell him everything.’
Her gaze shot to me. Her eyes widened when she saw I was serious.
‘I’m done with lying. There’s more that even you don’t know. I know how to defeat Nick to end this war once and for all.’
She swallowed but nodded. If Nick no longer existed, we could be free to love whoever we wanted. Nick’s men had believed that Sophie was my twin flame. I wasn’t so sure. Not that I liked the label or the importance placed on such a relationship. Shouldn’t all relationships be as important? Why did humans insist on making everything so complicated?
‘I think Matt is my twin flame. I don’t know what to do. Do I wait to see if he’s definitely left his wife for me?’
Cancer shrunk when our gaze met. She seriously believed the man who had put her in danger was her twin flame?
‘I think sometimes the term Twin Flame can be an excuse to hang on to someone that you can’t have.’
Her chin started to wobble, which made me regret my words. She was a sensitive soul. There was obviously something about Matt that made her think she was in love with him.
‘I’ve noticed that a lot. Married people believe the other person is their twin flame. The person outside the marriage is just as…’
Her words trailed off. She was that person.
‘Deluded?’
‘Taurus!’ She threw a pillow at my head.
I caught it and hit her with it. She giggled as she shook her head. ‘You’ll never change.’
‘You know I’m right.’ I reached over to my bedside cabinet and gulped down two painkillers. My headache was getting worse with the sentimental heart to heart.
‘What do you mean?’
She wrung her hands together. She was obviously trying to understand what was going on with her own journey. I didn’t know how to answer.
‘I think sometimes…we are so damaged, we settle for what sounds okay. We make an excuse to allow whatever happens to be acceptable for a reason.’
She let her breath rush out as she pushed herself off the bed.
‘Yeah. I’ll admit to you, for a while, I thought that it didn’t matter that he was married. That his wife had something to teach him before he came to me. When their relationship had run its course, he would leave her for me. The problem with that…’ her sentence trailed off.
‘Go on.’ I was genuinely interested in the way her mission – I hated that word – was playing out.
She tucked her hair behind her ear. ‘I didn’t want to stop seeing him, even when he was with her.’
I didn’t know what to say. To me it just sounded like an excuse to have an affair. For both Matt and Cancer. She made it okay by believing he was her twin flame. In my book, it wasn’t okay.
‘I didn’t see him, though, as you know. It was only ever in thought because I couldn’t contact him. But sinc
e he gave me his number, I’ve been so tempted to—’
‘Stop!’
She snapped her mouth shut and nodded. Her eyes teared up again.
‘You know the answer in your heart. Why are you analysing it?’
She stood with her hands in her pockets, tears dropping from her eyes. Her skin was pale as she looked down at her painted toenails.
‘I think he’s my catalyst.’ She sucked in a breath as she pulled out a hand to swipe at her cheeks.
‘What’s that?’
She frowned at me. ‘You know, the false twin.’
My eyebrows rose. ‘The what…?’
Not another bloody label. We were supposed to be some kind of warriors. I hadn’t quite got my head around it…but we were getting sucked into the normal human perception.
‘The person that makes you face yourself. So you can see the wounds from childhood and past lives.’
I gripped my hands together. The pulse of anger that shot through me didn’t go unnoticed. Cancer took a step back. I breathed deeply to calm myself down. There was no need to get uptight about the rubbish that she was spouting.
‘That person forces you to heal, so that your real twin can come in. Like it has with you.’
I released my fists. My fingers returned to normal colour. I dragged my gaze to her and cleared my face. ‘What do you mean?’
Her throat moved. She tucked her hair behind her ear again. I fought the urge to tell her to put it up. She was timid. Her gaze darted around the room instead of looking at me. She knew me well. She was expecting a tirade of disbelief.
‘Well, Sophie came in and helped you to come out of your shell enough to meet Kerry. Sophie had to go for whatever reason and now Kerry has come in properly.’
My tut made her spin away from me and reach for the door.
‘Wait!’
She froze with her hand on the handle.
‘I’m sorry. You might actually be right.’ The memory of the kiss I had shared with Kerry was too powerful to deny. It wasn’t the same as with Sophie. It had been more intense.
Cancer spun back to me, her mouth open in disbelief. ‘Did you just admit that I was right?’
‘Yeah, yeah—’
‘No! I’m serious. This is a breakthrough. You’ve—’
‘Shut up!’ I whinged, laughing when she opened my door and yelled at the others.
Aries, Scorpio and Gemini rushed to the room. They crowded in, waiting for Cancer to say what she needed to say.
‘Everyone! Taurus has just admitted that I was right.’
Aries started to clap. Scorpio looked bored as he glanced around the room. Gemini jumped on me and pretend punched my side. My head couldn’t really take it, but I didn’t complain.
‘I want to hear you say it,’ Gemini said.
I thrust him away from me, but he came back for more. He wasn’t usually touchy feely with me. I put my hand on his head, holding him off. He tried to reach me but couldn’t.
‘You stink, mate,’ he said.
The others laughed. Aries started a commentary. ‘And Gemini goes in for the kill, but Taurus manages to hold him off by trapping his opponent’s head in his meaty hand. The pair grapple on the bed, but I’m unsure what’s happening now. Are they wrestling for the title or merely trying to pin each other down to decide who’s going to take it up the—’
‘Aries!’ Cancer shouted.
‘And it’s over to Scorpio for his point of view,’ Aries finished, holding an invisible microphone in front of Scorpio’s face.
Gemini managed to connect a fist to my side. I grunted as he swiped at my arm, knocking my hand away from his head. He fell on me but quickly jumped back up when I let out a huge fart.
‘Taurus has won by farting,’ Scorpio announced. His voice was so deadpan, everyone in the room laughed.
‘Why do you smell so bad?’ Gemini asked as he stood beside the bed.
‘He’s detoxing,’ Virgo announced, coming in the room.
She was small framed. Her training as a nurse brought her into contact with many ex addicts.
‘It shows that he’s actually doing what he said he would. Although, you could do with cleaning this room. And opening a window.’ She waved her hand in front of her face.
‘All right, leave me alone to get cleaned up. Aries…’ I called as they started out the room, ‘I need you to get the whole team together tonight. I have some things to tell you all.’
He nodded before escorting the others out.
Admitting that Cancer was right was hard. I had been so adamant that none of what we had been taught was true. I wasn’t going to change my spots that much, but instead of doubting what we had been told, I was going to find out the truth about it. For that, I needed to speak to Mother and Father.
That would come later, though. Before I could find out the truth about our mission, I had to confront Nick. There was something I wanted to pay him back for. And I needed my siblings to help me.
Chapter Nineteen
‘You got high with Nick?’
Sagi screeched so loud I had to cradle my head.
The noise rose as they started to talk at once. Twelve siblings in one small living area was enough to drive anyone to drugs.
‘Okay, quiet down!’ Aries called.
They listened to him as usual. He was in charge for a reason. I hated following orders, but we had come to a mutual agreement. He didn’t try to boss me too much, so I got on with my life.
‘There’s a reason I turned to drugs.’
I didn’t know if telling them was the right thing to do, but Kerry had encouraged me to speak my truth, as she had put it. I had wanted her to be at the meeting, but it wasn’t possible. She would learn more when, or if, something developed between us. Until then, I didn’t want to scare her off with my family troubles.
‘Go on,’ Pisces said gently.
She smiled at me kindly. I nodded back, noticing how she brushed Antony off when he tried to pull her to him. He winked at me. Was there a problem between them already?
‘She’s a bit funny about being too intimate in front of everyone,’ he said when I didn’t say anymore.
My head shook as the others chuckled. For the first few months of them being together, they couldn’t take their hands off each other.
‘Antony! Why are you telling them our business?’
She slapped him playfully on the arm. He caught her hand, brought it to his lips and kissed it before placing it on his lap.
‘The honeymoon period is almost over,’ Aries said, resting his arm over Natalie’s shoulder.
She poked him in the side. He pretended to frown at her. The rest of us watched them. Some were envious, while others were happy for our siblings. Most of us just felt sick.
‘Cancer, I need a puke bucket,’ I said.
She laughed and slapped me on the back. We were both on the sofa. The two baddies of the group united in our hour of judgement.
‘When I was younger, I took out a knife one night. I was going to kill you all.’
The room fell completely silent. Not one of them had something to say about my confession.
‘I was so angry when you threatened to tell my tutor everything, I wanted to get rid of you all. I have this problem with people telling me what to do—’
‘You don’t say?’ Capricorn said.
Her comment elicited a few laughs, but it died away quickly. They were morbidly curious about my murderous mind.
‘Since that day, I’ve felt nothing but guilt. I also worry what I could be capable of. I was only eighteen, but I could’ve done you harm that night.’
I rubbed my hand over my shaved head. Gemini had clipped it for me before the meeting. It was a grade three, so the dark bristles were still there. They scratched the skin of my palm.
‘What stopped you?’ Aries asked.
Cancer took hold of my arm and pulled my hand away from my head.
‘You were awake,’ I answered, looking at Aries. �
�It snapped me out of it. It doesn’t matter that nothing happened. It just matters that I felt like killing you all, full stop.’
‘I don’t agree,’ Leo said.
I glanced over at him. He was cradling his guitar in his arms, like he always did. His latest tattoo was covered with a piece of cling film. The reddened welt held a new ink picture of a robin. The bird’s chest was bright red. It blended well with Leo’s tattooed sleeve.
‘I can tell you right now that I’ve wanted to kill every single one of you loads of times. In fact, I want to kill Scorpio right now for nicking that gorgeous girl from me last night!’
I fought the smile that came to my lips.
‘Can’t help it if the woman has taste,’ Scorpio replied, sitting back in his chair with a smug grin on his face.
‘Leo is right, we’ve all thought about murdering each other. When I shared a room with Cancer, she drove me insane,’ Pisces said.
She glared when Cancer stuck her tongue out at her.
‘But I actually got a knife…’
Aries shrugged when I looked at him. ‘It’s in the past. You’ve not killed us yet, so move on. If that’s what’s been holding you back, you’ve got to let that go.’
I clamped my mouth closed on the retort that sprung to my brain. Aries could tell me what to do in this instance. It was his way of forgiving me.
‘Please explain how you ended up getting high with Nick,’ Virgo said. ‘I can’t guess how you got into that situation.’
They listened intently for the first time in my life. They focused completely on me as I told them about Matt and Cancer.
‘I knew you were still hiding something,’ Aries said to her.
She avoided eye contact with him by fixating on her hands. I reached out and squeezed one.
‘So Matt instigated a meeting that went wrong. You and Kerry were trapped together for twenty four hours. Nick’s men brought Sophie as bait to get you out. You went and Sophie was killed. We knew about Sophie, but we didn’t know Cancer had something to do with it.’ Aries glared at her bent head as he spoke.
‘Nick’s men took me to a house. He offered me drugs and answers,’ I said to take the heat off Cancer.
[Zodiac Twin Flames 01.0 - 03.0] Boxed Set Page 44