by D C Little
“Hasn’t Butler proved himself?” Blake asked.
“It’s not his family, we’re against.” David cleared his throat. “It’s him leaving with information about our camp.”
“Leaving only to return with his family so they are safe.” Blake felt like that was pretty obvious.
“And possibly bringing others with him,” Mitchel said.
“You mean like if others needed a safe haven?” Kris asked.
“No, we mean if he is followed by people like Meyers and his men.” David squirmed.
“He’s military. He knows how to not leave a trail.” Blake stood and paced the room. “This is ridiculous. You can’t stop him from leaving. We aren’t running a prison.”
“We are making the hard choice that is best for the safety of the entire camp.” Pastor Rob clasped his hands together.
“How do you expect to force him to follow this ridiculous decision?” Blake retorted, shaking his head in disbelief.
“You, of all people, should know how to track down a deserter,” Mitchel said with narrowed eyes.
“Really?” He hammered Arland with a glare. “You are going to sit by and allow this?”
“The council is here to speak for the entire community. These decisions aren’t made easily.” Arland held his gaze.
“So, there’s really no discussion, no room for consideration.” Blake’s frustration mounted into barely controlled rage.
Only bowed heads met him, except for Kris’s and her eyes were wet with tears. Blake let out a guttural yell and kicked over an empty bench before storming out of the meeting room.
****
Kris took in deep, calming breaths as she walked toward her dwelling. After checking on the kids, she asked if Hannah would watch them for a few more minutes. She needed to find Blake.
For the others, seeing this side of her husband left them in shock. In truth, he had done so well for so long that his reaction surprised her a little as well. He had been pent up for too long. It was worse than the winter in the bunker. At least then, they only had each other to deal with.
Adding the dynamics of the town full of its eclectic people overpowered her as well. As much as she didn’t want Blake to take off again, especially after what happened last time, she knew he needed a break from the day-in-day-out dynamics of the community.
She held her breath as she got to the door, bracing herself for the onslaught. She wouldn't be surprised one bit if he were packing up their things and informing her they would be living elsewhere.
She had to admit that even she felt like doing that slightly. The fact that the council was trying to keep people there against their will scared her, sending a shiver down her spine.
She let her eyes adjust as she entered the shelter, but she knew immediately that their home was empty. She glanced around and sighed when she saw nothing misplaced or in the process of being packed. At least she would have a chance to calm him down before he started threatening to find their own place in the wilderness.
She knew where he would be. After allowing her eyes to readjust to the bright sunlight, she followed the soggy trail into the forest. As nice as it was to see bare ground and even some green, the mud created a whole new difficulty. She had pretty much given up on keeping things clean.
The peace of the forest filled her as the birds sang, happy that spring had finally arrived in their little valley. A bunny hopped from one bush to another. She braced herself for the silent twang of a bow and sighed when she didn’t hear it. For once, she got to enjoy nature without seeing it as a meal.
At times she longed for the time she had alone with her family, nestled in the safety of their property. Though that peace had sometimes been suffocating, it also created a safe haven. She only had to navigate her family’s emotions.
With the community, she needed to be much more alert and cognizant of everyone else’s needs that many times she forgot her own, or even her family’s. For instance, Blake. She should have seen this coming. He had been on edge for a while, ever since they returned from the cabin actually.
The sound of the creek reached her. The closer she got, the more she felt her husband’s presence. She had always loved the fact that she could sense him like that. Even though at times it could be overbearing, most of the time it made her feel safe and protected.
If she hadn’t been paying attention, she wouldn’t have noticed his slight shift in posture that signaled he knew she approached. She did, though. So, she came up to him silently, sat on the rock next to him and leaned her head against his shoulder.
Without a sound, he wrapped his arm around her and pulled her closer.
“Remember when we used to hike out here for the fun of it?” he asked.
She nestled into him. “And we talked about all the things we would do if we had to survive out here.”
“And sometimes almost wished that society collapsed so we could.”
Kris shifted to look up at him.
“Oh, you never did that?” he asked.
She didn’t know what to say, so she dropped her head back to his chest and reveled being held by her husband.
“We’re making it happen,” she said after several moments of silence.
“Yeah, but at what cost?” He gently pushed her off him to stand up and start pacing. “They are trying to control who gets to leave, Krista. This is serious.”
“I know,” she said, leaning her elbows on her knees. “I don’t know what to do, but leaving isn’t really an option.” She glanced at him hopefully.
“I know how you feel about that,” he growled. “I can’t stand by while Butler is forced to stay here knowing his family is in trouble”
“I don’t expect you to,” she said slowly, carefully.
He stopped his pacing and met her eyes. “It could mean the end of this.” He waved his arm back at the community.
“If they go that far, then I would have to agree with you. We would be better on our own.” It hurt her heart to even say it as she thought of Laurie and Lexi and Ryan.
Yet, the council put them in a precarious position. Communities like this had to balance control with individuality, and because of the survival situation, the balance did not greatly exist.
Blake watched her for a long moment before resuming his pacing. She knew this cue, waited while he processed, distracting herself with the beauty around her.
The creek rushed right now, and she shuddered thinking of Brent and his son being swept down it. Suddenly, the beauty faded, so she focused on the green budding on the trees and the birds hopping from branch to branch singing their happy tunes. If only life were that simple.
Blake squatted in front of her.
She pulled her attention back to him, ready to hear what he had come up with as a plan.
“How would you feel about taking the kids on a long journey?”
Kris opened her mouth, her first thought was of her back and the pain of carrying her child and a heavy pack.
“I will carry extra weight so you don’t have to take a pack. Mercy is getting heavy, I know.”
She closed her mouth.
“The snow is melting. More every day. And the cattle area is ready to go. After a few more days, it will have enough greenery for them.”
“You want to bring them back, but you don’t want to leave us again.” She cocked her head. “You don’t trust me?”
He reached for her hand. “I trust you, but I know things happen, things that are out of our control. I can’t stand the idea of leaving you guys again.”
“Well, Tucker will be ecstatic,” she muttered.
“Does that mean you’ll think about it?”
“Of course we’ll go. When have I ever told you no?”
He raised an eyebrow, and she covered her laugh.
“And Butler?” she asked.
“He’ll come with us...to watch over you while I scout, of course.”
“Of course,” she repeated, dread filling her stomach.
<
br /> She hoped his plan wouldn’t put them all in jeopardy, and yet she understood. If the positions would have been reversed, she knew nothing would stop Blake from getting back to them. She couldn't expect him not to assist his friend. Besides, the council was wrong for trying to exert so much control.
Once again that pulsing niggle of fear sat inside her chest. Things were changing again, and she had no idea where it would take her and her family.
~14~
“You’ve got to be kidding me!” Butler pushed up to a stand, squeezing his fists by his sides.
People stopped and turned to watch Butler and Blake as they discussed the council’s decision near the fire.
Blake rested a hand on the man’s shoulder and whispered in his ear. “Don’t downplay your anger, but know I have a plan.”
Butler shoved Blake off him. “You can’t just go along with this order can you? They have no right to hold me here. I’m not a prisoner, am I? Does this same rule apply to everyone?”
Blake eyed the crowd gathering. For once, he didn’t mind the show. People needed to know the control the council tried to implement on them.
“I am not happy about this either,” Blake replied, his voice hard and even. “You have every right to find your family.”
The whispers started going rampant in the crowds, and soon Arland came toward them, his brows crunched and a sadness in his eyes. When he approached them, his shoulders sagged.
“Brother, could you not have picked a more private location for this conversation?”
“Why? Don’t people have the right to know that you are refusing to let me leave to save my family?” Butler yelled, taking a step toward Arland.
Blake put a hand on Butler’s chest, halting him. “As you can see, this news is quite upsetting for my friend. Can’t you put yourself in his shoes? What would you do if Hannah was stuck in the city under coalition rule?”
“It’s different. You know that. Butler is new to the community. They don’t trust easily.”
“And you, Arland? Don’t you trust me after all I have done to prove myself?” Butler asked.
“As a leader, I have to think of the entire community, my friend.”
“Don’t my friend, me.” Butler spat at the ground near Arland’s feet.
“It’s not that I don’t trust you, Ben. I don’t think you would intentionally bring any harm to our community. It’s the unintentional that has me worried.”
“I’m trained to not give out personal information. I would die first.”
“We don’t want that, and we don’t want harm for your family.”
“Then let me go to them,” Butler pleaded.
“The council has made the decision. You can appeal it during the community meeting next week.”
Butler threw back his head as a deep, throbbing yell burst forth. The anguish-filled cry stopped everyone, turning them as they stared with wide eyes. It was a cry of anguish, heartache, and fear, and Blake knew it all too well.
Butler shouldered past Arland and headed into the woods.
Arland turned toward Blake then, his eyes holding remorse. “Surely, you can understand. It’s the survival of our community, of my family, of your family, that is at stake.”
Blake understood his perspective, but it neither gave him the right nor the power to tell Butler he couldn’t leave. That indignation sputtered inside of him even as he nodded.
“I am leaving to bring the cattle up tomorrow. I’ll take him with me, give him time to cool down before the community meeting. I know he will want to make his rebuttal.”
Arland watched him with a new wariness in his eyes. Blake recognized it immediately and knew that it was not misplaced. So, before his friend had a chance to argue his statement, he turned on his heel and followed Butler into the woods.
Butler paced in the same steps he had only an hour or so before, his breath blowing forcibly with each exhale. He didn’t stop his rhythm when he saw Blake approaching.
“Tell me you have this figured out, man. I’ll leave during the night if I have to. This is too much.”
Blake wondered if this was what he looked like when he had been all worked up earlier. Fists opening and closing with enough force to turn knuckles white. Breath coming out in loud bursts like a locomotive. Steps pounding the muddy ground with such ferocity it sent sprays of mud feet away.
“I do,” Blake said, calmly. In fact, he felt calm, almost like his life had purpose again.
“It’s not right. I mean, I expected this from Meyers, but here, really?”
“Yeah, my head is still spinning.”
“I don’t know if I want to bring my family back to something like this. It’s scary, man. Like a cult or something.”
Blake let the thought process. He squatted in the mud, fingering a tiny green shoot growing out of the soggy earth. Spring. He sighed in relief. Things would be changing now, and if he had to take his family on their own, it would be easier to do now that things were growing and animals would be coming out into the open.
He had planning to do. He needed to figure out how to pack enough to survive on for a while, in case things went south with the council, and all in one pack. He couldn’t ask Kris to carry a heavy pack plus their daughter. He saw how hard that was on her.
“Blake. Blake!” Butler shoved him lightly.
“Yeah,” Blake shook his head and stood up. “What?”
“You zoned out, man. I asked how I need to proceed.”
“I have a plan,” he said again. His stomach growled and on the breeze he had the scent of beef. Mmm... The last of the cow he had brought back a few weeks ago. They sure knew how to make that cow last a long time among the size of their community.
“So, you’ve said, but I don’t want you getting involved. You’ve already put yourself on the line.”
“And you saved my life.”
“After you saved mine. We’re even.”
“That’s not how I see it.” Blake pounded Butler’s back and then steered him toward the community where his stomach led him. “Besides, it’s wrong. I would do anything to save my family.”
“Exactly.”
“We’re heading out to bring the cattle back tomorrow. Kris and the kids will be coming with us.”
“Us?”
“Yeah, us. I thought you could come to help keep them safe.” Blake turned toward him to make sure he understood. “It’s going to be a long trip, so pack accordingly.”
The dawning of understanding fell over Butler’s face, and he nodded.
“Be sure to come to dinner. It would be good to show everyone you have no thoughts of running.”
“Not sure I can handle that.” Butler stopped at the edge of the forest, staring out at the community.
“You won’t want to miss one last meal with Lexi before we go for the long journey.”
Butler nodded.
“You got this, man,” Blake said, knocking him with a fist before he headed toward his dwelling.
The smell of dinner cooking filled the camp, making his mouth water, and making him realize that he had missed lunch. It would still be a half hour or so until it was ready most likely, so he headed toward his dwelling to prepare his family for another shift.
****
“Why are we packing so much, Dad? I thought you made it back from the cows in a day,” Tucker asked the question that had been plaguing Kris.
She knew the probable answer, but didn’t want to be the one to bring it up. Sometimes it was better to not know.
“Kevin and I made it in a day and most of a night at a quick pace.”
“I’m faster now, Dad. Mom says I have endurance.”
“You do, Champ. I wouldn’t ask that much of you, or your Mom and sister, though. Not unless our lives depended on it.”
“And we’ll have the cattle to herd,” Kris said, trying to keep her thoughts on their true purpose or off what she knew Blake planned for the side.
“Like cowboys!” Tucker pretended
to rope cattle and do a little jig that made Mercy laugh. “You like that, sister?”
Kris breathed in the moment. Enjoying her children's bonding made her forget that things might forever change with the outcome of this journey.
At dinner that night, she made sure to sit next to Laurie and Lexi. She didn’t want anything jeopardizing the friendship she had with them, but family came first. Besides, she didn’t want to be away from Blake any more than he didn’t want to be away from them.
Her heart ached while she watched Tucker and Ryan talk about the upcoming adventure. They had become so close over the last few weeks. It would devastate the both of them if her fears became realized.
She glanced at Blake. His eyebrows were furrowed as he watched Tucker as well.
“I wish I could come. It sounds like a great adventure,” Ryan said, scuffing his foot in the dirt.
“Dad, can Ryan come with us? He could help me cowboy up the cows.”
Blake glanced at Kris, and she met his eyes. It would be easier for Tuck to have a friend, but what would Lexi say about it? She turned her gaze to her friend.
“I...I don’t know,” Lexi said, looking from her to Ryan.
Kris knew she had already bonded with Ryan, treating him like the son she had lost. Thinking of Tucker going on a long journey like that without her made her stomach heave. At once, she felt guilty for Lexi feeling on the spot like this.
“Please, Lex. I would be a big help. It would be nice for a bit of a distraction. I would be so bored without Tucker here.”
“That’s a long time. You’re talking about a week?” She turned to Blake, her hands twisting in her lap.
“At the least,” he said, keeping his tone even, not giving away if he felt one way or the other about the idea.
“It’s so long to be away...” Lexi hesitated.
“I’ll miss you, too. It will go by fast.” Ryan held her gaze.
“You know, cattle herding could be dangerous.” Every eye in their little group turned on Kris, many with a hard edge. “I’m just saying it might not be a bad idea to have a medic along on the journey.”
Ryan and Tucker smiled broadly looking back at Lexi. Blake kept his gaze blank. Butler clenched his jaw, and Lexi stared around at everyone.