by Kylie Brant
Elizabeth shook her head, drawing his attention. “The man who came after me was Ted Baker,” she said firmly. “I saw his credentials. He said you’d been shot....” A quick shudder racked her. The agent’s words now seemed prophetic. “He told me he was taking me to you. When I was walking into the warehouse, I was hit from behind. I don’t remember anything more until right before I saw you again.”
She recognized the cold, steely rage in Sully’s eyes, and instant worry reared. “Maybe we ought to do this later.”
“Not a chance,” he retorted. His gaze went to O’Shea. “How the hell did Baker get my badge and shield? He gave my credentials to Vargas to prove I was an agent.”
“Kale said Baker asked him for them a couple of weeks ago. Claimed you told him you didn’t trust Lowrey enough to let him keep them. He’d already relayed your... interest...in Miss Bennett. Baker used both to his advantage. He also used his technical knowledge to jam the receiver for the tracking device.” A muscle jumped in O’Shea’s jaw. “When Lowrey missed you at the meeting and raised the alarm, all we could do was spread out and cover the areas where you’d met with Conrad before. We already had agents on their way to the warehouse when Elizabeth’s call came in.”
“I still don’t understand why, though,” she put in. Both men looked at her. “Was it for money? Baker sold out the investigation and Sully for money?” It seemed inconceivable to her. That a man’s life was worth so little—not just Sully’s, but all those touched by the drugs that would continue to fiow into the country when the investigation failed.
“Five years ago it became apparent that there was a major leak in the DEA,” O’Shea told her. “Major busts were falling through—undercovers were being made as agents. When the arrests came, the big dealers were slipping through the most careful of investigations. I figured it was someone with a fairly high level of clearance, but I couldn’t be sure who until you gave us his name.” His tone turned bleak. “I have to admit, I never suspected my own assistant as being the source of the leak. He took a huge risk. This was a high-level investigation receiving a lot of scrutiny.”
“I’m betting that it was the implication of the cartel that tipped the scales for Baker,” Sully guessed.
O’Shea nodded. “Rumors are there’s a race among the biggest Colombian manufacturers to establish the widest market bases in Europe and the Far East. You had experience over there, and that made you an even more attractive prize to turn over to Vargas.” His voice hardened. “Baker was holding out for another payment from the man. He admitted that he was going to turn over the names of DEA agents working overseas, along with the agency bases. With those facts and the how-to information Vargas was hoping to get from you, he’d have the inside track on overseas operations. It would be enough to get him established as a real power there, as well.”
Elizabeth looked away, sickened. They talked so matter-of-factly of betrayal, of men trading lives for money and power. The lives they were discussing could have been Sully’s and hers. For the first time she began to recognize that Sully’s guardedness had served him well in some instances. A certain level of distrust had been necessary to keep him alive. She wrapped her arms around her middle, shaken. She tried to imagine doing a job every day where you not only had to worry about the crooks but also your peers doing you in. She didn’t like to contemplate it.
And she hated to think of Sully living that way.
Misinterpreting her silence, O’Shea reassured her, “You can bet that there will be an airtight case built around Baker. And with the additional charge of your kidnapping against him, he’s got no hope of ever getting out of prison.”
He got to his feet. “Well, I’ll head out. I suggest you get yourself back to bed, Sully. I’ve heard the nurses here are vicious when they’re crossed.” He chuckled at Sully’s muttered oath. “You’ve got vacation time coming after you’ve recuperated. Check with me when you get back to work. I’ve got a couple cases that might interest you.” He missed the sudden indrawn breath from Elizabeth and went on, “We’d have to establish a new cover for you, but that shouldn’t be a problem.”
There seemed to be a stranglehold on her lungs. Another case. Another cover. She sprang from her chair, turning away when both men looked at her quizzically. “It’s a little early to be talking about the next case, isn’t it? I mean, I’d think you’d at least let Sully get used to the fact that he managed to live through the last one.”
O’Shea hesitated, seeming to choose his words carefully. “I’m not sure how much you understand about the work of a DEA agent....”
“Oh, I think I understand enough.” She turned and met his gaze squarely. “An agent’s kind of like the child they use for alligator bait, isn’t he? They tie him to the end of the rope, and he walks into the swamp. All the kid can do is hope they jerk the rope back in time.”
There was an awkward silence, then, after a few more words to Sully, O’Shea left. Elizabeth busied herself pouring a glass of ice water she didn’t want from the pitcher. “I thought I’d go visit my mom for a few days,” she said, watching the ice cubes dance and bob in the cup. “Mr. Milway has agreed to give me some time off.”
His response was slow in coming. “You’re...going away, then?”
She nodded jerkily. “For a little while, anyway.”
“That’s too bad. I was hoping you could help me.”
Slowly she turned her head and looked at him over her shoulder. “Help you? With what?”
He lifted his unbandaged shoulder. “Look for my brothers. You were the one who was so convinced I needed to find them. Now you’re going to run off and leave me to search by myself. And I don’t have the slightest idea how to go about it.”
She turned completely around, stepped toward him, stopped. She tried, and failed, to keep the joy contained. “You...you’re going to try to find your brothers?”
“I guess....yeah. I’ve been wondering what happened to them.” He cleared his throat. “Maybe I owe it to my mother to find out.”
Emotion clogged in her chest. “That sounds like a good idea.”
“I’m going to need your help, though.”
The word slashed through her with red-hot nails. “Need again,” she murmured shakily. “You know, Sully, there was a time not too long ago when I might have settled for need. But I’m stronger now and I want more. I won’t settle for less than everything a man has to give. And I can’t live with the pain of being locked out of the most important parts of your life. I can’t...” Her throat worked for a few moments. “You had ten years.” The words seemed torn from somewhere deep inside her, and they were edged with pain. “Ten years, Sully. Your work is dangerous, I know that. But other agents manage to do your job with wives and families. They don’t use it as an excuse to keep the rest of the world at bay.”
“I realize that.” His voice was stark. “But I had an excuse. At least I thought I did.” He looked away and took a breath. “I was in Mexico.” The words were low and strained. “It was my first job out of the country. We were stationed in a town at the foot of the mountains. The dealers were the law down there—our operation was a joke. The names of the agents, our building, the cars we drove, they were all common knowledge. Our job was to find out as much information as we could about the cocaine growers’ operation, and turn it over to the Mexican and American governments.
“It was an impossible situation, but some of the people living there hoped we’d be successful. They actually wanted to end the dealers’ reign of power over the town. One of those men was Alberto Ramon.” His eyes met hers and they were filled with bitter self-recrimination. “He offered to help collect information. I was leery about using a civilian, but my partners and I decided it was the only way we could do our job. He’d pass us information he’d picked up at work, or at parties.” She watched his hand go absently to his chest in search of a cigarette.
The emotionless delivery continued, an eerie contrast to the ghosts in his eyes. “He turned
up missing one day. His wife and children were frantic. Two days later pieces of him began to be delivered to the building we were using for our headquarters. The dealers were taunting us, flexing their muscle. It didn’t matter to them that he was one of their own countrymen. He’d betrayed their cause, and because of that he’d been butchered. The mission was aborted and the dealers won that time. An innocent man died for nothing.”
Her gaze fell away and she drew a ragged breath. Perhaps she could understand a little better now what he was telling her, because she’d experienced firsthand the kind of evil he was talking about.
“I swore I’d never risk another innocent that way. And there was no way in hell I wanted to risk you. The further I kept you from my job, the safer I could keep you. Or so I thought.”
His gaze was steady, and his jaw squared. “I’m not going to lie you, Ellie. Part of the reason I kept so much of my life from you was because of what happened to Alberto. The other part was because I just didn’t trust worth a damn.” He lifted a shoulder. “Didn’t know how, I guess.”
She closed her eyes, wishing she could deny that his words had scored a direct hit. “And now?”
“And now...” There was a pause, and the next words were spoken in her ear. Her eyes flew open to find him leaning over her. “I figure you can teach me.” He trailed a finger down the line of her throat and paused at the pulse point, which scrambled beneath his touch.
“You said I needed to let someone in,” he reminded her. “I figure I’m ready to take that risk if you’re there beside me. I love you, Ellie.”
She reached behind her and grasped the rail of the bed, to avoid doing a slow, boneless slide to the floor. “You...you love me?” Hope was doing a crazy tap dance in her chest, and she waited half-dazedly for his answer.
There was a glint in his eyes, a smoky heat. “And I think you love me. But I still want to hear you say it.”
She cupped his jaw in her hand, watched the impatience flicker across his face, and smiled, slowly and tenderly. “I love you, John Sullivan.”
His mouth descended and caught hers in a brief, hard kiss. “We’re going to do this right,” he murmured against her mouth. He drew away a fraction and looked down at her. “I can make changes in my job. I don’t have to work deep cover. Hell, I don’t have to be an agent.”
Touched, she stroked his rough jaw with her palm. “You can’t make changes for someone else, Sully. I wouldn’t ask that of you. It has to be what you want.”
“I won’t risk you again.” She saw the terrible guilt in his eyes and knew that some ghosts would take time to banish. “We’re going to do the whole thing—a wedding, a honeymoon and then a real home.”
Her hand reached up and tangled in his hair. “And then—” her lips teased his again, brushed over his mouth lightly, and then away “—we can start the search for your brothers.”
He went silent as he rested his forehead against hers. “Yeah,” he said finally. “I have to try. But I don’t want you to get your hopes up, Ellie.” The warning seemed as much for himself as for her. “There’s no guarantee that we’ll ever find them.”
“Life doesn’t come with guarantees.”
“Except for one.” He pushed her hair back over her shoulders. “No matter what else happens...I’ll always love you. That won’t ever change.”
Her arms twined around his neck. “Promise?”
His head descended so his mouth brushed hers when he spoke. “I promise.”
ISBN : 978-1-4592-6581-3
UNDERCOVER LOVER
Copyright © 1998 by Kimberly Bahnsen
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