“Ohh,” Sarah moaned against her mouth, pressing her body harder into Joss, rising onto her toes so that Joss’s hands could travel lower.
One little flick of her wrist, Joss knew, and her hand would be under that dress and up that satiny thigh. Maybe even guided to the warm, moist apex between those thighs by Sarah’s own impatient hand. Would her underwear be satin? Cotton? Lacy? Oh God, Joss thought. I can’t do this. I cannot do this without losing my mind. Without losing everything I am, everything I’ve built, everything I want in the future. When she’d asked Sarah to join her on the trip, she wanted hot crazy sex with her. Ten times a day and another ten at night, truth be known. But now that they were here, she feared that sex would only be the beginning of things. Things that were too dangerous to contemplate.
She pulled away quickly, midkiss, and held Sarah by the arms to keep her at a distance. Breathless, still questioning what the hell she was doing not going down on her knees right now and pleasuring Sarah with her mouth, Joss said, “Sarah, if we make love…”
“What?” Sarah looked hurt, confused, her mouth turned down in anger. “What’s the worst that could happen? We’re both single, consenting adults. We both want each other.”
“You don’t understand.”
“Then tell me.”
Joss’s mouth was impossibly dry and already regretting the loss of Sarah’s moist lips and slick, skilled tongue. “I’m afraid…if we make love…that we won’t be able to go back to the way things were before. And I need to. I need for us not to…not to…”
“Become a real couple?”
Joss nodded, the rest of her words caught up in her throat.
“You have my word.” Sarah’s voice had a chill to it, like a cool fog rolling in off the sea. “What happens here stays here, Joss. I promise you.”
Except, Joss thought, I don’t know if I am capable of promising that. I don’t know if I can make love to you and not want all of you. Forever.
“There’s one more thing.” Sarah shrugged free of Joss’s grip and took another step back. “I do plan to seduce you before the week is out, so consider yourself warned.”
Chapter Nineteen
A good night’s sleep had a calming effect on Sarah. Maybe it was the rhythmic sound of the endless tiny lapping waves or the salty air breezing through the open window all night long. Whatever it was, by morning Sarah had come to some conclusions. The only possible conclusions, really. She didn’t see how they could stay celibate all week. There was no question that the heat between them was going to explode into full-on, sweaty, blow-the-roof-off-the-house lovemaking. They were close, so close, to giving into their desires. Sarah had even briefly considered slipping into Joss’s bed in the night, naked, to cut the final thread holding them back. But no, she had other ideas on how to push Joss closer to what they both wanted and needed.
Sarah understood that Joss was scared, that she needed her emotional space and that in fact she might never be able to overcome her insecurities about relationships if left to her own devices. No. It was time to push, time to make a decision for both of them. They would have sex because they needed to satiate the raging desire that both could barely contain anymore. But what happened on Sanibel Island would stay on Sanibel Island, exactly as she had promised Joss. There would be nothing more. Sarah was no fool. She knew Joss would never commit to her emotionally. This would strictly be a one-off, a brief interlude, a timeout. She wasn’t a lawyer like her father, but perhaps they could call it a temporary amendment to their agreement. A codicil that would become null and void as soon as they left the island. There would be no pressure that way, no expectations, no disappointments, no one getting her hopes crushed and no one getting hurt. She could handle it, she decided, and she was pretty sure Joss could too if only she had the guts to try. It was the only way forward for them—sex with no strings.
Cycling halfway across the island ate up the morning. They stopped for a light lunch of chicken salad and sweet tea before heading back on the bike path that wended its way along the ocean. It was a warm clear day without a cloud in the sky. Perfect, Sarah thought, for an afternoon swim in the cottage’s pool. And perfect for the bikini she’d brought with her—fire engine red and not much bigger than postage stamps in all the important places. It was not something she’d ever wear publicly, but for this? This was war, and it was time to bring out the big guns. The suit was lethal and something, she felt sure, that Joss would not be able to resist. She grinned to herself as they stashed the bicycles in the shed next to the house.
“What’s so funny?” Joss asked. “You’ve been looking all morning like you’re holding on to a state secret.”
“No secret, but a surprise maybe.”
Joss narrowed her eyes, but her grin matched Sarah’s. “What’ve you got up your sleeve, young lady?”
Sarah laughed wickedly. “Trust me, there are no sleeves involved.”
“Hmm, do I need to be scared?”
“Oh yes, you definitely need to be scared, but I promise it won’t hurt.” Sarah thought again of that tiny red bikini, how it left nothing to the imagination. She only hoped Joss would be anxious to rip it off her. On second thought, it wouldn’t even need to come off since it almost wasn’t even there. Oh no, Sarah thought, enjoying the tickle of anticipation that was beginning to control her body. A mouth or a hand could easily get around those little pieces of obstruction.
“Good, because I’m not really into pain. Care to share your plans?”
“A swim, that’s all.” Yeah, right, an innocent little swim. With me as the shark. “In the pool. I thought it might be a good way to cool off.”
Joss shrugged, her eyes far too trusting and her smile way too innocent. She was unknowingly setting herself up to be the perfect prey. “Okay. Sounds good.”
Poor little lamb about to be led to slaughter, Sarah thought wickedly. If Joss could in fact resist seduction that red hot and blatant, she was hopeless. Or turning straight. “I’ll meet you out back in about ten minutes.”
* * *
The pool was small, Joss noted, but pretty with its bordering garden of bamboo, aloe, hibiscus, jasmine, some wild grasses she didn’t recognize and, of course, the ubiquitous palm trees. It was a veritable jungle offering maximum privacy, which appealed to her, since she didn’t like parading around publicly in her one-piece bathing suit. Not that the suit was racy in any way. The opposite was true. It was light blue and its cut was practical, meaning that one could actually swim in it. In Joss’s opinion, swimming was the only reason for wearing a bathing suit anyway. But it didn’t mean she liked people seeing her wear one. She probably should have thrown on her swim trunks and a workout top, but it was too late now.
For shade, there was a cabana rigged out of bamboo poles and canvas, walled on three sides with its open side facing the pool. It was a pleasing little oasis, complete with the unseen, soft sounds of the surf a couple of dozen yards away. A narrow stone path led from the private yard to the beach. If they got tired of the pool and the confines of the small yard, Joss supposed, they could always drag their chairs down to the ocean.
She perched her sunglasses on her nose and spread her towel on one of the canvas chaise lounges in the cabana. Sitting down, she stretched her legs out in front of her and contemplated the paperback in her hand. She hadn’t wanted to bring a novel, but Nancy had thrust Jodi Piccoult’s Sing You Home in her hand and practically commanded her to leave her medical journals and texts behind. Advice which Joss had somewhat ignored. “I bet you don’t even recall the last novel you read,” Nancy had teased her, and Joss conceded the point. She didn’t have time to read for pleasure and hadn’t, really, since high school. She thumbed now to the first chapter, wishing the book was a little thinner. Or that her vacation was longer.
“Nice setup back here,” Sarah announced as she entered the cabana. “It’s beautiful.”
Joss, engrossed in the third page by then, mumbled her agreement without looking up. A flash of
bright red in her periphery demanded her attention, but it was another minute before she glanced at Sarah, who by now had stretched out beside her on the matching chaise lounge. “Oh. My. God.”
Her book fell from her hand. Her sunglasses suddenly felt too small for her eyes. If her heart didn’t start beating again—and soon—Sarah was going to need to do CPR on her, because she damned well might not survive the vision before her.
“I…uh…do you…um…” Lord have mercy! Her mouth would not work. With more effort, she finally rasped, “Do you have any idea…” Her mouth quit on her again.
Sarah smiled nonchalantly, her eyes dancing with a playful challenge. She was a kid putting her best toys on display, knowing full well her playmate wanted to touch them all. “What? See something you like?”
“Okay, this is so not fair.”
“What? Oh, are you talking about my bikini, by chance?”
It was red. And skimpy. And made of some kind of material that was shiny and looked wet already. But it was everything else that thoroughly riveted Joss and left her a blithering, dopamine-addled fool. Sarah’s skin was creamy and soft and perfect, her legs were strong and sculpted, she had a tummy that looked in need of caressing and her breasts were perfectly round and more than a handful and so inadequately covered by those tantalizing triangles of cloth that barely covered her hard nipples. Goddammit, her hands needed to be all over Sarah.
“Oh, no,” Joss answered. “Not just your bikini. It’s what your bikini is showing off to maximum advantage. That’s what I call hitting below the belt.”
Sarah held all the cards, and she laughed like she knew it. “I did warn you, remember?”
“Oh no, you didn’t. I would have remembered if you’d warned me about that…that…thing you call a bikini. If that’s what they’re calling those little scraps of cloth these days.” Jesus, what must her ass look like in that thing? Probably like two naked orbs with the narrowest strip of cloth between them. The thought made Joss’s heart, which had mercifully started beating again, do a little stutter step. She might not, she realized, actually survive this trip.
“No, I didn’t warn you about the bikini, but I did warn you I was going to try to seduce you.”
“Hmph. We’ll see about that.” Joss didn’t want Sarah thinking she was an easy target. No sir-ee. She picked her book up from the floor and opened it, pretending to read again. Christ, she’d never be able to get through a sentence, never mind a paragraph, with a near-naked Sarah beside her. And not just quietly sitting beside her, but with a promise to seduce her. Well, Joss thought, I’m tough, I can handle this.
“Good book,” Sarah said. “I read it a couple of years ago. And since you have such amazing powers of concentration, I might as well leave you to it and take a dip.”
She stood up, tossed her towel aside and stretched her arms above her head, languid as a cat in no hurry to move on. And not a whisper of shyness over displaying all her goods.
Holy mother of God, Joss thought with an inward whimper, sliding her sunglasses down her nose and sneaking a peek. Yup, that ass was perfect and needed her hands on it. She watched Sarah finally saunter to the pool, wiggling that backside to full effect. She slid in, sinking to her neck, then stood up in the shallow end, facing Joss. Rivulets of water rolled down her neck, her arms, and into the crevice between her breasts. Oh God. Joss’s mouth watered. If I keep looking…No, I can’t keep looking, especially at those nipples perfectly outlined and standing at attention. She told herself she was not struck by the way the wet ends of Sarah’s hair, made a darker shade of red by the water, curled at the edges. Nor by the way the sunlight reflected from the water’s surface illuminated her eyes. She tried to concentrate on her book again. Really tried. And failed miserably.
“The water’s lovely. Care to join me?”
Tentatively, Joss stood. Carefully she set her book and towel down, wanting to give the impression she was in no hurry. She was fully aware of the old adage, if you can’t beat ’em, join ’em. And, well, she was working up a sweat in this Florida heat. “You won’t, like, do something silly if I come in there, will you?”
Sarah tilted her head. “Depends how you define silly.”
Hmm, Joss thought. Like jump on me? Like peel your top off and flash your breasts at me? If Sarah did either of those things, Joss knew her resistance would go up in smoke. It pretty much had anyway. This was playing with fire, and yet she couldn’t resist the desire to touch her fingers to the flame.
Joss slid into the water. It was warm, like bathwater. She tossed her sunglasses onto the pool deck, dipped her head under water, slowly paddled around. She kept her distance from Sarah, who was still in the shallow end, her back to the pool wall. She was watching Joss with the eyes of a shark sizing up its prey. Oh fuck, Joss thought, there’s no escape. She’s going to want to kiss me and I won’t be able to say no.
It wasn’t long before Sarah crooked her finger at Joss.
“What’s the matter?” Joss replied. “Your water wings not working?”
Sarah grinned, kept motioning with that damned finger. “Why don’t you come and see for yourself?”
Joss wanted so badly to remain rooted in place, to have the strength of ten women when it came to resisting Sarah. But this…this is way more than a mortal human being should have to handle, she thought with a new flutter in her chest. She inched her way to Sarah as though she were being pulled along on a rope. Of course she could say no, could leave the pool, go inside, go to the beach, hop on her bicycle and flee. But Sarah, in all her wet, near-naked loveliness, could no more be resisted than a warm fire on a frigid day. Joss knew she was at Sarah’s mercy.
She stood in front of her, the water at her waist, and tried to play it cool in order to maintain some semblance of control. “You rang?” Inside she was a trembling, weakened mess. The trick, she decided hopefully, was to maintain eye contact. Whatever you do, do not look down!
“I did. There’s something I need.”
Joss swallowed. “What would that be?”
Sarah threw her arms around Joss’s neck and pulled her closer. “This.”
Instantly, they were kissing. Not gentle, not polite, not timid kissing. This was full-fledged, I-want-to-swallow-you-whole kissing. Sarah’s mouth was hard and demanding against Joss’s. Her tongue hurriedly demanded entry, and once inside, it teased and danced and plundered until a soft moan escaped Joss’s mouth. Joss could think of little else but the fact that she was standing in a swimming pool, having the absolute hell kissed out of her by Sarah and wanting it never to end. How, she wondered, had she not spent every waking moment thinking and conspiring to kiss Sarah like this? How had she been satisfied these last number of weeks with the few kisses they’d shared? And how the hell was she going to be able to concentrate on anything else ever again? Plainly and simply, she’d become undone in about thirty seconds.
Sarah’s hand dropped away from around her neck, reached for her hand, placed it on her waist and then, guiding it up past her stomach, her rib cage, settled it against the underside of her breast.
Joss moaned again, the soft yet firm heft of Sarah’s breast now filling her hand. More than filling her hand. She cupped it, squeezed it as if it were something fragile, something to be worshipped. God, it felt good.
“Oh, yes,” Sarah murmured, pulling her mouth away from Joss’s and arching her neck to present her throat to Joss.
Joss slid her mouth to Sarah’s neck, to her throat. She sucked and nibbled softly, eliciting a sharp intake of breath from Sarah, a moan of encouragement. She cupped both of Sarah’s breasts in her hands now, marveled at the feel of them, and dared finally to look at them.
“God, Sarah, you’re so beautiful.” That chest that was rising and falling rapidly, that was swelling and pushing into her hands, abolished any further thoughts from Joss’s mind. She squeezed harder, thumbed Sarah’s rigid nipples until she felt Sarah tremble against her.
Urgently, Sarah whispered, “Joss
, please.”
Yes, Joss thought, bending and dipping her head to Sarah’s chest. Her mouth locked onto a nipple, hard as a pebble, the cloth covering it wet against her teeth. She sucked it, flicked her tongue against it, felt Sarah push greedily into her mouth. A bolt of electricity shot through her and with it came a stark moment of clarity. She stopped, kept her thumbs caressing where her mouth had been, and looked at Sarah. Her eyes were half-lidded; she was already gone.
“Sarah,” she whispered, unable to give voice to anything further. What she was thinking was how impossible, yet how right it felt to be on the cusp of making love to this woman. Her hands, her mouth, seemed already to know Sarah intimately. And yet, as much as her body wanted to share the highest form of pleasure there was with her, she couldn’t help but wonder what it would cost her. Cost them. Could they really do this and then pretend next week that it had never happened? Could she possibly give only her body to Sarah? It was her last thought before her mind went completely blank, so absorbed was she in Sarah’s body and with all she wanted to do to it.
“Wait.” She tried one last time, but her heart wasn’t in it.
“No,” Sarah said in voice that left no room for compromise.
Decisively, she took Joss’s hand, removed it from her breast and slid it down to the small triangle of cloth between her legs. Joss’s knees buckled.
Chapter Twenty
As Joss’s fingers lightly traced the cleft between her legs, then skittered in random, frenzied patterns, Sarah grew so dizzy with desire that she lost track of space and time. The weight of her body became light and liquid, like the pool water that eddied about her thighs. Her legs seemed no longer able to function.
Even as she pressed Joss’s hand harder against her crotch, Sarah said, “I…can’t…do this…here. Oh God, Joss.” She bit her bottom lip to keep from screaming out.
By Mutual Consent Page 15