A Dinner of Herbs (The Bannaman Legacy)

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A Dinner of Herbs (The Bannaman Legacy) Page 48

by Catherine Cookson


  Her face was serious now as she said quietly, ‘Perhaps so. But do you believe what your grandmother told you happened at Rooklands Farm?’

  He dropped his arms from her now and rose from the chair, saying slowly, ‘Yes, yes, I do believe that, every word, and that fact worries me and makes nonsense, I suppose, of what I’ve just said, at least in part.’ He came back quietly with the last four words, repeating, ‘At least in part because there is so much mischief caused in the world by one person transposing another’s thoughts through their own individual channels.’ He spread out his hands now and on a lighter tone said, ‘I had the idea a few years ago when I was nineteen that the world needed changing, and that I could do it by starting a kind of school and calling it the Academy of Reason and in it teaching nothing that couldn’t be proved. But after talking it over with an old scholar, who laughingly said, ‘Do that, it’ll get rid of God,’ I recognised my thinking was merely part of the growing pains of youth. Yet there are always germs left over from the thoughts of youth, good germs…Why are you smiling like that?’

  ‘I like to hear you talk. It’s so different from what I’ve been used to: Was there too much cinnamon in the cake? Next week all the downstairs curtains must be washed. I must hurry up and finish the tapestry for that chair, it’s almost threadbare. That’s inside the house, and much much more. Outside: the number of sheep going to market. Should they send them into Hexham or Newcastle? Weighing up the cost of paying a drover to drive them into the city against taking them in themselves to Hexham. That problem comes up every year. Should they extend the herd? It would mean buying more land. And the latest excitement is starting a turkey farm. Strangely, I haven’t minded it up till now, although I did look forward to Hugh coming and hearing his tales of the city and its doings. And now, having said all that, I…I feel ashamed, because we’ve all been brought up in a wonderful home life, and I’m ashamed that I should now look upon it as tedium. Yet, since the day I first stepped into this cottage my way of thinking and looking at things has changed.’

  ‘Mine too. But do you know what you have just described appears to me as the ideal life, and a pattern I’d like to follow from now on. And I’d like nothing better at this moment than to ride back with you and talk about the everyday things that you’ve just described with your menfolk.’ He paused; then, his voice low, he said, ‘It’s got to come. Sooner or later, it’s got to come.’

  ‘But not yet, not yet. You have no idea of the feeling.’

  ‘I have. I can imagine it.’

  She screwed up her eyes for a moment and brought her teeth tight down on her lower lip in a voiceless denial of his statement, and he persisted, ‘Believe me, Kate, I know exactly how your father will react.’

  ‘You don’t!’ Her voice was loud now. ‘You don’t, Ben. His hate of the Bannamans does not lie under the surface, it’s there on top for all to see. The whole countryside knows how he feels, and he still talks about it to anyone who will listen. The agony of the four days in that barn seared…’

  ‘Don’t. Don’t.’ He had placed his hand gently over her mouth. ‘It’s a kind of torture to me to think about that. Anyway, for the time being, they need know nothing about my identity. I am that fella from the Americas.’ He smiled. ‘That’s how one gentleman in the Allendale Hotel addressed me the other day. “You the fella from the Americas?” he said. Well, that’s all I am for the time being, so take me down soon to meet them…please Kate.’

  ‘Give me another week or so.’

  ‘But why, my dear? What do you hope to accomplish in that time? My name will still be Hamilton then.’

  ‘I’ll…I’ll break the ice. I’ll start talking about you, singing your praises, expounding your virtues.’

  ‘Oh, my! Then we are doomed to failure. Anyway, you’ve got to take into account their reaction when they find out I’ve bought this house.’

  ‘Yes, I’ve thought of that. Have you told Charles?’

  ‘Only yesterday.’

  ‘What was his reaction?’

  ‘Amazement. He said it’s a bad house and he only wished I had consulted him before taking the step.’

  ‘And he’s right.’

  ‘Well, I’ll promise you one thing. If I ever feel I can’t cleanse it, I’ll burn it down. But in the back of my mind I can see it as a thriving farm once more, something like your father’s. I passed your home yesterday.’

  ‘You did?’

  ‘Yes.’

  ‘Oh, you shouldn’t.’

  ‘Why? Everybody knows I am gathering details of the villages and hamlets around here. Look.’ He pointed to the shelf. One part held what looked like a ledger and a small stack of papers, and he said, ‘I’m putting it all together, it makes quite a history.’

  ‘You’re writing about the Bannamans?’

  ‘Yes, all about the Bannamans. And the Fountains. You see, my grandmother’s name was Fountain. I took a coach ride last week to her birthplace, almost on the borders of Scotland. I found the house where she was born, but there was no living relation left. Another family had apparently lived there for thirty years. Anyway—’ He now took her face between his hands and ended softly, ‘It’ll be something to pass down to our children.’

  He was greatly perturbed when he saw the tears spurt from her eyes as she made a sound that was almost a groan before falling against him.

  When she returned the yard was empty, and as she led her horse to the stables, she noticed there was no-one in the byres either. It wasn’t until she had unsaddled the animal and rubbed him down that the unusual quiet of the yard caught her attention, for there was always one of the other of the men to be seen somewhere about. It was as she was going to the grain store for feed that she saw Terry. He was coming from the barn, and she said, ‘Where’s everyone?’

  He thumbed towards the house, saying, ‘Indoors. Lads have got their boots off.’

  The lads had their boots off. That meant, for some reason or other, there was a meeting other than in the kitchen, because none of them was allowed through into the house with his working boots on, except her father.

  She looked towards the kitchen door. And yes, there they were, three pairs of boots lying haphazardly near the foot-scraper.

  What now? It couldn’t be a visitor, for there was no sign of a horse or carriage. Had they found out? She felt a cold sweat on her brow as Terry said, ‘Mr Bentley come. His horse was in a lather. I put it in the bottom stable.’ He thumbed again. And she smiled at him now in relief, saying, ‘Oh, I must go and see what it’s all about then.’

  ‘I could tell you from here.’

  ‘You could?’

  There was a broad grin on Terry’s face as he emitted one word, ‘Courtin’.’

  She flicked her hand at him, returned his smile, then saying, ‘See to Ranger’s feed, will you?’ she walked quickly across the yard. Courting? That meant he had come to see her father to ask for Florrie’s hand. Oh, she was pleased, pleased for Florrie.

  As she entered the kitchen she heard the hubbub in the hall, and when she went to open the far door she paused at the sound of high laughter and the chatter of voices.

  The family were all gathered in the hall and they did not notice her entry, for they were looking through the open door. But when Mary Ellen caught sight of her, she cried, ‘Oh, here’s Kate! Kate, come and hear the good news.’

  She was at the front door now looking with the rest of them to where Florrie and Charles Bentley were walking sedately side by side across the gravelled drive, making their way to the yard and the stables.

  It was Hal who turned to her, saying, ‘Well, what do you think of that? He came and asked me for her hand.’ He put his head back and laughed. ‘All right and proper. Well, she’s set, and well at that. ’Twill be you next,’ he said, bringing Maggie a wallop on the buttocks. ‘But who’ll come for your hand, Richard Taggart or Barney Pilkton?’

  Before Maggie could answer, Gabriel said, ‘No, Dad; it’ll be Daffy Tull, and hi
s twelve cats. It’s said he’s looking for a wife. The fourth is it, or the fifth?’

  He turned and ran as Maggie made a dive for him. And in the hubbub as they made their way towards the kitchen, Hal’s voice rose above the rest, saying, ‘Engagement party in the barn? We’re having no such do in the barn, ’tis here in the house it’ll be held. Do you hear what I say, Mrs Roystan?’

  ‘I heard, Mr Roystan, and I’ll remind you that we can get twice as many in the barn as in the sitting room, dining room, and hall combined.’

  ‘Who wants twice as many?…Hello, there, lass.’ It was as if he had just noticed Kate, but his next words, as he held open the door for her, denied the assumption, for with an enquiry in his voice he said, ‘Enjoy your ride, lass?’

  ‘Yes, Dad, I enjoyed it very much.’

  He let the door swing behind him before continuing, ‘Aye, well, that’s what rides are for I suppose. Well now, let’s all get back to work, for if I’ve got to pay for a wedding, it’s got to be earned somehow.’

  ‘Oh, Hal.’ Mary Ellen shook her head at him, and he shaking his head back at her and mimicking her voice, said, ‘Oh, Mary Ellen.’ Then he went out, accompanied by his sons, and they were all laughing.

  Mary Ellen now placed her hands on the table and let out a long drawn sigh and, looking towards the delph rack, as if into space, she said softly, ‘Isn’t it lovely for her, to get a man like Charles?’

  ‘Because he’s related to Lord Redman?’

  ‘No, miss, not because of that.’ She had turned sharply on Maggie now. ‘But at the same time it’s nothing to be despised or sneered about.’

  ‘I wasn’t sneering.’

  ‘But you were pretty near it. Anyway, when we’re on, it’s about time you were making your mind up who you’re going to settle with. I hope it isn’t Barney Pilkton, ’cos his mouth will swallow his head one of these days.’

  ‘Perhaps you would have me marry Daffy Tull just to get rid of me?’

  ‘Don’t be silly, girl.’

  ‘I’m not being silly, Mam. But I feel the odd man out hereabouts.’ She now turned her infuriated gaze on Kate. ‘I’m apparently of no interest to anybody. I haven’t been discovered by a famous father, nor do I possess a secret friend up in the hills.’

  ‘Maggie!’ Mary Ellen’s voice was a yell, but Kate put in quietly, ‘It’s all right. It’s all right.’ And returning Maggie’s look now, she said, ‘We can’t all be blessed with good looks, so whoever doles out the compensations has had me in mind lately.’

  And with this she left the kitchen, closing the door none too gently behind her.

  Mary Ellen, leaning across the table, now cried at her daughter, ‘She wasn’t blessed with good looks, but you are. But what you’re not blessed with, Maggie Roystan, is a kindly disposition, and I’m tellin’ you, it’ll bring you no good. And when I’m on, I’ll tell you this, that neither of those fellows you’re tipping the wink at will provide you with much more than shoe leather. Have sense, girl. If you’re going to cock your hat, cock it at somebody worthwhile. There, that’s out. I should have made it plain to you afore.’

  ‘Yes, you should, Mam, and I would have known where I stood. But I know now. You never have cared for me like you have for the others. It’s been Kate this, Kate that, or dear Florrie, gentle Florrie. But I’ve never heard you say a word in my praise.’

  ‘No, because you were too keen to praise yourself.’

  ‘You don’t like me, do you?’

  ‘Oh, girl, girl.’ Mary Ellen’s voice softened and, now going swiftly round the table, she held out her arms. But Maggie would have none of it. She almost slapped her mother’s hands away saying, ‘I don’t want any of your left-overs, Mam. I can take care of meself. You see to your dear Kate and give her your blessing when she trots over the hills to her fancy man.’

  The slap that caught her fully across the face almost knocked her back towards the settle, and there was a dead silence between them for a moment, until Maggie, holding her head to the side, one hand covering her cheek and the tears now running down her face, turned and fled from the kitchen, leaving Mary Ellen, her arms tight about herself, her fingers clawing at her oxters, muttering, ‘My God! My God!’

  She did not recognise that she was suffering no recrimination for striking her daughter but was agonising over the fact that anyone should think Kate had a fancy man. But if Maggie could say this, others would think it, because her regular journeys up into the hills wouldn’t have gone unnoticed: there were eyes behind hedges and drystone walls. She would have to speak to Kate. Yes, she would, and firmly.

  Nine

  But before Mary Ellen spoke to Kate, she spoke to Hal. ‘I’m worried,’ she said. ‘Our Kate’ll get her name up if she’s not careful.’

  ‘Get her name up? What about?’

  ‘I had words with our Maggie this afternoon. She’s turned against Kate of late. I don’t know why. Well, yes, I do. ’Tis this American fellow. I saw she had her eye on him that first day in the hotel dining room, and now she’s calling him Kate’s fancy man.’

  ‘What?’

  ‘That’s what she’s saying. That’s what she said, Kate’s going over the hills to see her fancy man. Now if she’s saying that, there’ll be others who’ll have seen her out on her rides and going in the same direction. ’Tisn’t right that she should go off visiting him. He should be coming here and visiting her if he thinks so much of their friendship, as she calls it.’

  Hal stared at her now, saying, ‘Do you think it’s something more?’

  ‘Could well be. ‘Cos any man with a spark of intelligence would find Kate good company. And that would be the least of her attractions, because once she starts talking you forget about her plainness. In fact…’

  ‘Aye, in fact what?’

  ‘Well, sometimes she doesn’t appear plain at all.’

  ‘You’re learning, woman, you’re learning. Anyway, there’s got to be change one way or t’other. She’s got to stop her traipsing for her own sake, or he’s got to take on the journey this way. Why he hasn’t done it afore has puzzled me, I might as well tell you. So now you go on along to her room there and sort things out…’

  A few minutes later Mary Ellen knocked gently on Kate’s door. She had done this for some time now, yet she never knocked on Maggie’s or Florrie’s door, nor yet on her sons’. However, she always made herself known with her voice before she entered their rooms, that was, since the day a few years ago when she had left Tom and John’s room with a red face, when John had cried at her, ‘Aw, look Mam, I’m out of nappies, and I feel bare even in me long clothes.’

  When Kate said, ‘Come in,’ she entered, saying, ‘Not in bed yet?’

  ‘No, I was reading a bit.’

  ‘You won’t do your eyes any good reading in a single candle light.’

  They looked at each other. Kate had on a long grey woollen gown over a blue cotton nightdress. Her straight black hair was hanging in two long plaits over her shoulders, the tapered ends reaching her waist. Her face in the candlelight looked warm and soft, and the sight of her thus made Mary Ellen think, She’s worth any man’s love.

  ‘Something wrong, Mam?’

  ‘It’s how you look at it, lass.’ Mary Ellen sat down on the edge of the bed and with the first finger of her right hand she began to scrape the inside of the thumbnail on her left hand, while concentrating her gaze on it; the action had become a habit over the years and portrayed an inner anxiety. After losing her two youngest children, she had sat doing this for hours on end.

  Looking at the picking finger, Kate said quietly, ‘What is it, Mam?’

  ‘’Tis about your rides out, lass. You’re going to get yourself talked about.’

  ‘How?’ The syllable was sharp and brought Mary Ellen’s attention from her fingers to Kate’s face, and now her voice low and her words rapid, she said, ‘People have tongues and eyes. They’re linking your name with this fellow.’ She had no proof of this, but she knew i
t could happen, so she felt no compunction in enlarging on it, saying, ‘You’ll soon be the talk of the place. Every week, regular as clockwork, going across there. Why can’t he come across here?’

  ‘Because I wouldn’t let him, because you would have all put two and two together and made half a dozen out of it. Mam’—she put her hand out and gripped Mary Ellen’s knee—‘I asked you a little while ago to have patience.’

  ‘I’ve had patience, lass, and so has your dad, but it’s running out. We were worried sick inside ourselves, about…about him…Roddy, your father coming. Then we knew relief after how you took him. But now, the night with Maggie…’ She bowed her head, and Kate came back quickly, ‘Oh, Maggie. Maggie’s tongue.’

  ‘Aw, lass, I don’t want you to be hurt again.’

  ‘I won’t be, Mam. There’s only two people in the world can hurt me now and they are you and Dad.’

  Mary Ellen screwed up her face and stared at her daughter before she said, ‘What about him, your friend?’

  ‘He’ll never hurt me.’

  ‘You seem very sure of that.’

  ‘I am, very sure.’

  Mary Ellen got to her feet, saying warily now, ‘Aye, well, the world’s changin’. In my time there was no such thing as a friendship with a man. It was either one or the other, something or nothing.’

  ‘Goodnight, Mam.’ Kate leaned forward and kissed her mother, but Mary Ellen did not return the kiss. Turning away slowly, she said dully, ‘Goodnight, lass.’

  Kate now went to the door and gently slid in the bolt. The only one who was likely to visit her at this hour would be Florrie. She didn’t want to talk to Florrie tonight. Returning to the bed, she dropped on to her knees and, burying her face in her hands, she prayed: Show me what to do. And in the silence that seemed to envelop her she waited, and after some minutes, when the answer came into her mind, she rose from her knees, snuffed out the candle and got into bed.

 

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