by J. P. Rice
Alayna waved her index finger in front of her face. “This is something I just can’t do. I can’t explain it fully in here, but it is something I cannot bring myself to.”
I understood Alayna’s point. She used to be queen of the land and now I’d asked her to reduce herself to a common street whore. However, Burn impressed me by offering to make a strong sacrifice for the group. Even though I didn’t want her to do it.
Alayna said, “We need to figure out a way around this. I’m confident we can find a different solution. Maybe we come back tomorrow and hope he asks for something else.”
Felix said, “That is some serious wishful thinking. Why don’t we find someone else in here to go ask him? Maybe the faun will make a request we can handle.”
Alayna advised, “We can’t trust anyone around here. Did you see the way our server was smiling at us? I’ll bet anything she was thinking about how she could cut us into tiny pieces. Anyone we ask for help will say that he or she wants gold. Then when we give them that gold, they will run away, never to be seen again.”
I scanned the packed bar and creatures kept slamming into our table, so we decided to stand in the corner opposite Fencester. Searching through the strobe lights, I made eye contact with a sexy woman in a tiny dress.
The woman licked her thick lips and tapped her friend on the shoulder. The two women fought their way through the supernaturals to get to our corner. I took a few steps to meet them, knowing Alayna would frown on me fraternizing with the locals.
The first woman, who was in a red dress, extended her hand in a manner that said she wanted me to kiss it. I grabbed her hand and pecked it gently. We made eye contact again despite the menacing strobe lights, and she said, “My name is Trysta, with a y.”
“It’s nice to meet you, Trysta with a y.”
“This is my friend, Desperada.” The woman, who was in an emerald dress that barely covered her extended a gloved hand.
I osculated her black lace covered hand and nodded with a smile. They were tall, so I assumed they were sidhe. I had to be wary they weren’t trying to seduce me, then kill me. “How are you ladies doing tonight?”
Trysta batted her eyes. “All right. Just trying to have some fun. You know how it is.”
Actually, I didn’t know how it was. I had an entire city expecting me to keep it safe from the monsters of the night. At only twenty-three, I wished I knew how it was, trying to have fun that is. “Where are you from?”
The two women turned to each other and smiled. After a short silence, Trysta blurted, “We aren’t from around here.”
Hmm. “Do you live on the other side of the lake?”
Desperada answered, “We live on the other side of a lake, but it’s Lake Superior.”
My eyes widened with excitement and I choked on my beer. I fought off the coughing sensation. “What are you two doing here?”
They turned to each other again, unsure of who should answer. Desperada’s voice reached my ears despite her face being hidden by the strobe lights. “Life sucks where we are from and we had a client who told us about this place. He said we would have to use our...given talents for a while here, but eventually we could learn magic and hold power like the mighty Queen Al.”
I warned them, “You do understand how dangerous this place is, don’t you?”
Trysta nodded. “Just as dangerous as Marquette. At least the area we hang out in. People are getting shot all the time. Plus, here we can get paid a lot more and rise to power. All we need to do is learn magic now.”
I wanted to counsel these ladies to get the hell out of here as fast as their legs would carry them. A better approach would be to shake the shit out of them and scream ‘run’ in their faces. Few people harnessed the ability to learn magic, and I didn’t want these ladies to find out the hard way.
But then again, who was I? I was doing the same exact thing, if not embarking on a more perilous adventure than these girls.
But I knew magic. I wouldn’t have let the soles of my shoes hit this land if I hadn’t known magic.
“How long have you been in the city?” I queried.
Trysta shrugged her shoulders, and responded, “Only a few days. But we’ve made more money than the past two months in Marquette. And everyone is really nice to us. They say we are safe because everyone here likes having sex with pretty humans.” She giggled.
She had a fair point there. I said, “So you’ve been here for a few days. Have you had the pleasure of experiencing Fencester the First?” I gestured with my head toward the corner of the room.
The ladies giggled and Trysta said, “No. I’m not even sure what that would be like.”
Desperada said, “It would probably be like fucking a horse, I would gather.”
“Another question.” I felt sleazy as the words spilled out of my mouth. “How much would it take to ride that train, so to speak?”
The ladies whispered into each other’s ears for a solid minute. I got nervous they would demand too high a price. I had the eight fake gold coins and Alayna had a few real ones. The former queen hadn’t told me the exact number, and I hadn’t told her that my coins were fake.
Trysta licked her lips and said, “Two, two-ounce gold coins.”
I nodded and Desperada’s eyes widened. “Two each,” she demanded.
Damn. Tricky bitches. I’d tipped my hand too early. I didn’t have much negotiating leverage considering this might be my only hope for women who hadn’t been sexed by the faun. I felt grimy doing this, but these ladies would sell their bodies, regardless.
I handed each woman her wage. “Follow me over there while I set this up. Stand behind me when I talk to his translator.”
I peeked over my shoulder at the dirty looks coming from my crew. It was hard to tell with Alayna’s mask, but I noticed anger centered in her icy eyes.
We worked through the maze of bodies to get to Fencester. By this point, a line had formed to speak to the faun, and we were third. I thought about how the rest of my merry gang would react when I revealed that I had saved the day.
I made it to the front of the line and faced the translator with the two women behind me. “I have two women this man has never sexed before.” I gestured to the ladies.
The translator spoke into Fencester’s ear and an ugly smile came across his thick lips. He stared blankly at both women for at least thirty seconds, making even me uncomfortable. The ladies stood tall and still as the faun tilted his mug to his lips and spilled more beer down his chest.
Fencester sprayed a mist of beer at the women, who held their ground despite the alcohol-laced shower. Using his crooked index finger, he beckoned his translator to come closer. He placed the aerophone to his lips and produced a gentle, melodious jingle.
His translator turned to the women, and said, “Is this for true?”
Both ladies nodded eagerly.
The translator focused on me. “Him say that it is a deal.”
Fencester held out an empty palm that I assumed was some sort of joke. Then a green object started to materialize. A golden glow glazed over his palm, tiny particles floating in the stale air. The faun blew away the yellow haze, leaving an emerald key in his hand.
“What’s this?” I asked angrily, feeling bamboozled.
The translator said, “This is a key to get into the Sphinx’s cage. You need it to get the coin for Lake Geopold.”
I threw my hands up and objected, “Whoa, whoa, whoa. That wasn’t the deal.”
Fencester blew into his flute and it emitted an angry, staccato song. His thick eyebrows bristled as he stared me down.
The translator said, “Him say that this isn’t original deal. This is different deal. You make different deal. Him make different prize. Good deal for your offer.”
Fuck. She had a point. I took the key from his hand and said goodbye and good luck to my new female friends. I’d sort of solved the problem.
As soon as I was within earshot of my posse, Alayna scolded me. “Off
gallivanting while we are trying to figure out the problem.”
I smirked. “I wasn’t gallivanting.”
Felix said, “Well, I think we might have something.”
“I might have something too.” I opened my fist and showed them the key.
Alayna gasped. “Is that the key to get into the cage of the Sphinx?”
I nodded confidently, even though I had no idea if it would work. “It is.”
Alayna shut her eyes. After a painful silence, she finally said, “Why isn’t it the coin for Lake Geopold?”
I sipped my beer. “Because you weren’t willing to sleep with the faun. I found two women that he’d never had before and made a deal. He said the Sphinx has the coins for the lake.”
Alayna closed her eyes and shook her head. “She does. However, in her seven hundred years in this land, she’s only handed out that coin seven times.”
Alayna scratched her neck where the bottom of the mask seemed to irritate her. “The fact that you touched the key first means you have to go into her cage and battle her. If you had let us in on your plan, I could have taken the key. I’m friends with the Sphinx.”
My buckeye tightened and my stomach went cold. Just for shits and giggles, I asked, “Out of how many fights?”
Alayna answered, “Thousands, if not in the tens or twenties of thousands.”
Had I just signed my own death warrant?
Chapter 16
I gazed around the Kaffeeklatsch to see if the Morrigan, the Celtic Goddess of Death, was lurking, waiting to claim her next victim. I didn’t spot her or any images of her washing my uniform, which would mean death was on the horizon.
When Celtic warriors saw visions of the Morrigan washing blood from their armor, it meant they were about to die in battle. The bards had documented it in the story of Cú Chulainn.
I rubbed my eyes. The strobe lights were really bothering me. “Why don’t you talk to her from outside the cage?”
Alayna set her drink on a shelf on the wall and another patron snatched up the floater almost immediately. Alana said, “Because the cage is encased in thick glass. She wouldn’t be able to hear me. Why don’t we find lodging for the night and form a new plan?”
I stuffed the key into the inside pocket of my track jacket. We left the supernatural party and found another little shack with the word ‘ROOMS’ spray painted next to the door. They only had one room left, and we decided that we should take it instead of hoping to find a place with several rooms.
The owner took our money and unlocked the room for us. The bony sidhe innkeeper lit candles in sconces on the wall, illuminating an open room with two mattresses and a busted window. A rat skittered across the floor and ducked into a small opening in the wall.
The owner left. I’d hoped he was causing that awful stench of body odor and death. He was not. We settled in as best we could.
Felix popped his top off and exposed a massive upper body. I knew he wasn’t scrawny, but damn, kid.
I commented sarcastically, “How much you bench, bro?”
Felix uncorked a bashful smile and looked down. “I don’t know. About two-fifty on a good day.”
“Not too bad.” That added a new dimension to his powers.
He said, “I need to meditate so I would appreciate it if you guys would keep it down.” He took another hit off his vape machine and went to the corner of the room. He sat Native America-style with his open palms on his knees. This time, I welcomed the fragrance of cloves covering up the funk.
“Burn, why don’t you set up a sound shield in front of us so that Felix can’t hear us?”
“Why don’t you just do it?” she questioned, playfully.
“I can’t use my magic for frivolity. It needs to be a life or death situation, more or less.”
She looked confused at first, bit her bottom lip, and then nodded confidently. The demoness waved her hands around and an emerald dust emptied from her fingertips, dancing in the musty air before our eyes. The shining green particles expanded, forming a separation between Felix and us.
With the sound shield in place, Alayna barked, “What is that?” She pointed at Burn’s purple hand.
Oh shit.
“Relax, it’s nothing.” I tried to calm her down.
“Nothing. You two lied to me. She’s a demon, isn’t she?” Alayna looked up at Burn, and growled, “Aren’t you?”
Burn squirmed in discomfort. “Yes, okay. Yes I am. I was going to hide it from you but that alcohol caused me to slip up. What difference does it make anyway?”
“A huge difference.” Alayna unzipped her black mask and removed the not-so-supple piece of leather. She had chilblains all over her neck where the bottom of the mask had been chafing against her sensitive epidermis. “This makes us a target now.”
Burn huffed and objected, “How? Nobody knows about it, just like they don’t know your true identity. If you can hide from who you truly are, why is it such a crime for me to do the same?”
Alayna stood in silence, mouth agape. “All right, let’s settle down for a minute. Let’s not start attacking each other.” Her conciliatory statements led me to believe that she knew Burn had a solid point. The demon was rather sharp.
I asked, “Why aren’t demons allowed here? I feel like there has to be a bunch running around here.”
Alayna rubbed her chin, and answered, “There are. Balor is the real reason new demons aren’t allowed in.”
Burn said, “Balor the Fomorian?”
“That’s the one. It is true that Lugh killed him with a spear crafted by Goibniu. Lugh put it right through the cyclops’ poison eye.” Alayna unzipped and peeled off her tight jacket. She fanned herself off by tugging continuously on the tank top fabric near her belly as she continued, “But we all know that not everyone stays dead. Balor was revived and allowed passage to Sleepy Willow. He no longer had usage of his evil eye, but he was still a cycloptic giant, nonetheless.”
Alayna stared into the flame of a candle and continued, “He lived here in peace for about one hundred years. Then one fateful day, he went berserk and ran amok, killing druids and sidhe in a frenzy of destruction. Some have intimated that he ate some mushrooms that made him temporarily mad. The King had the Warden of the East round up a posse and take Balor down. After that, demons were prohibited from entering this land.”
“So every demon just left?” I wondered.
Alayna shook her head and it was strange not seeing her braids flopping back and forth. “They were allowed to stay here. No new demons were permitted enty. Sort of like a grandfather rule.”
I spoke softly, “Okay. All the secrets are out now. And Burn isn’t a giant with a poison eye and she isn’t going berserk, so we’re good. This isn’t really that bad considering almost everyone here already wants us dead.”
The swaying flames from the candles danced in Alayna’s eyes, creating a haunting look. “No. It just creates another problem for us to worry about. And I don’t like finding out things like that all of a sudden.”
I chuckled. “All of a sudden? Is that what you just said? It’s supposed to be all the sudden.”
Burn interjected, “But wouldn’t it be all of the sudden?”
“I was just trying to use your jargon.” Alayna threw her mask and jacket on the mattress. “It’s a human saying, not one of mine.”
I announced, “Well the correct saying is all the sudden. Just want to make sure you all know that.”
Burn snapped, “Oh we’re sorry, genius wizard. We forgot only myopic Mike can be right. Please allow us to bask in the waterfall that is your profundity. Can we frolic in the fertile wisdom you love to spew?”
Alayna chuckled, and looked up at me as if to say, ‘take that, buddy.’
Whoa. What had I done? Both of them were probably upset over me talking to the two whores at the bar.
I didn’t remember much of the physical act itself, but I knew sleeping with Burn would complicate this trip. I hadn’t expected it to b
e this early. The way I saw it, I’d just saved these two ladies from performing a despicable act. No thank you for Mike. Not even a ‘Hey! That was mighty swell of you to save my lady parts from that foul goat beast.’
I felt cornered and bit back. “And what makes you so brilliant? You’ve read some books in the demon underworld. Maybe I do know a thing or two and I am proud of that. And one of those things is that the saying is ‘all the sudden.’ Period. Full stop.”
Alayna grunted. “You fool, it’s all of a sudden. It doesn’t make sense, but that is how you jackasses say it.”
Felix’s voice rent the sound shield. “Enough of this stupid logomachy. It’s an exercise in futility. And for fact’s sake, the phraseology is ‘suddenly.’ It’s fucking suddenly. Now can you keep it down so I can finish my session, please?”
Apparently, Burn’s nervousness about the sound shield was because she didn’t actually know how to form one. Felix had heard everything we were talking about.
It was like being yelled at by your father. Not my father, who hadn’t given a shit about me, but a responsible father. I wanted to punch Felix in the head, but the short, jacked mage was correct. Some nervousness and tension had spilled into our stupid argument.
“Let’s forget about that and hatch a plan to get to the Sphinx.” I looked down at Alayna. “Do you know how to get there?”
Alayna sat down on the bed, playing with her short red hair. “No. They moved her into the city after I left.”
“Does anyone have an idea?” I whispered.
“I know we shouldn’t trust anyone,” said Burn, biting her bottom lip. “But we might have to. Else, are we just going to walk around aimlessly, waiting to be chopped into little pieces?”
Alayna’s red neck returned to its normal ivory tint. “Maybe I will stumble upon someone I used to know when I ruled. However, that has a minute percentage of success.”
“What if we bribe someone with gold?” I widened my eyes and lifted my eyebrows, giving off a gold fever vibe.
Alayna looked up at me from the mattress. “First off, you look insane. Don’t do that again. They will likely take our gold and give us directions to a place where his or her cohorts are lying in wait to kill us and take the rest of our valuables.”