by Roxie Ray
“Daran…what are you doing here?” I took a step back, slightly terrified. The generals or Coplan being able to enter my suite unannounced was one thing, but Daran? When I laid eyes on the blond specter sitting at my kitchen table, an awful sense of dread coursed all the way through me. “How did you get in here?”
“Ah, Savannah. You should know the answer to that by now.” He smiled the most terrible smile I’d ever seen on anyone—alien or otherwise. “We specters have our ways.”
14
Coplan
As I left Savii’s room, I struggled to think of a time when my mind and body had been more conflicted.
On one hand, every muscle in my body felt fluid, warm and relaxed. The ever-present tension in my jaw and shoulders had dissipated overnight. I had spent so much of my life burdened with the weight of responsibility to my comrades, my patients, my family and my people, now that I had finally thrown it off, if only momentarily, I felt as though I might float away entirely.
On the other hand, my mind was a war zone. I had crossed a line last night, one that I feared I would not be able to uncross now that the deed was done. I had allowed myself the one thing I should never have even fantasized about. I had given into my desire. I had given into her.
Savii. No matter how I felt, she was the only thing that truly mattered now. We had both known the stakes. We had both ignored them for the sake of one radiant coupling—one that we could never repeat. But I feared that I had hurt her in reminding her of that. It was cruel of me to have taken her in the first place, to have made love to her and slept with her in my arms in an embrace that only mated pairs were meant to enjoy.
I had treated her in the way only a wife should have been treated, then I had abandoned her. We could not be together in that way, and there was nothing that could be done to change the fact. The entire universe had made that much all too clear—Savii could never be mine. Not in the way I truly desired. What other choice had been afforded to me, except to leave before I was tempted to claim her again—more permanently this time?
Still, if I could have gone back in time and been presented with the same decision once more…
I did not know that I would have changed anything.
My entire soul for one perfect night.
In hindsight, the only mercy in any of this was that Savii’s birth control implant would prevent a child from being brought into all of this. To spend myself inside her had felt so natural, so glorious and right, that I was not sure I would have been able to pull out otherwise. My every instinct had screamed at me to breed her. In that sense, at least, my mind and body had been in agreement, conscience be damned.
Her scent was still on me as I made my rounds that morning. The sound of her ecstasy in my ear, the way her voice trembled when she cried my name, followed me wherever I went.
“Hello, Nion.” I finished my rounds to find my green-haired warrior friend loitering near the entrance of the medical bay with deep bags beneath his eyes. A welcome distraction—and a much needed one. “How are you today?”
“Can’t sleep,” Nion grunted. He placed himself on an unoccupied exam table and looked at me dully, with none of his usual energy. “Something feels off here on the ship. Though I cannot place it, it is keeping me up at night.”
“The political turmoil on Lunaria could be causing you stress,” I suggested. I certainly did not enjoy thinking of the way the High Council could turn against us at any moment. I doubted anyone else was reveling in it either. “It does tend to spill over onto the ship, does it not?”
“Perhaps.” Nion raked his fingers through his hair, leaving it messier than ever. “But when have we not had to deal with the dark cloud of politics hanging over us?”
“There is…another possibility,” I allowed. “Your relationship with Alyse—”
Nion scowled. “What about it?”
I blinked, confused for a moment before I realized why he looked so angry at me. Alyse had been yet another rescued human here on the ship. A healer herself, she and I had worked together closely while she helped in the medical bay. There may have been some…gentle flirtations toward her on my part, though I had not truly meant anything by them. It had made her laugh and feel accepted, two things she had very much needed at the time. But Nion, of course, had taken offense. He’d fallen in love with her, and he would have torn my throat out in an instant if he’d seriously thought I was getting in his way.
I could not blame him for that. I could not think too much of whatever man Savii would marry back on Earth, lest I took a shuttle there to do the same.
“Nothing untoward, Nion,” I said with a small smile. “I simply imagine being away from her like this—while she is with cubs, no less—is making it difficult for you to rest in a bunk full of warriors when you would much rather be in her arms. Could that be the case?”
Nion’s eyes narrowed…then he sighed.
“Yes,” he admitted. “That is…plausible. Forgive me, Coplan.”
“It is nothing.” I waved his apology away. “I…understand how you must feel.”
“Do you?” Nion arched an eyebrow. “Coplan…if you and Savii—”
“Yes.” It pained me to admit it, but it felt good to let it out. The last time Nion and I had seen each other, I had been storming out of the command room in a fury at the mere suggestion that I was beginning to fall for Savii. But now…now I understood why I had been warned so many times. What I had not been able to see for myself had been terribly obvious for everyone else. “But I ask that you do not tell the generals, if your conscience will allow it. Savii and I will not be pursuing anything permanent, and it will not happen again.”
“Because you do not wish it to?” There was a cloudy gray sympathy in Nion’s eyes. “Or because you know you cannot.”
“You have fallen for a human before, Nion. You know the answer to that.” I clapped him on the shoulder and averted my gaze. “With Nightmoor drawing near and Atlanta’s rescue eminent, I cannot in good conscience prescribe you sleeping pills. They will dull your wits, I fear. Might I suggest meditation?”
“Only if I might suggest it for you as well,” Nion said with a small laugh. “I do not envy your position, Coplan. It does not seem fair that the actions of Kloran, Haelian and I have prevented you from having what you want. You must think us terribly selfish.”
“Not at all.” I shook my head. I could not guilt him for claiming Alyse for himself, nor could I resent him for his happiness. “I know that rough words have been exchanged on the subject. Believe me, I regret them. I was only lashing out. If things were different…if I had met Savii before you met Alyse…”
“It is an awful situation,” Nion agreed. “I do not envy your position. I do not know that I would have your restraint if the order of events had changed.”
“That is why I will go on to rule with the High Council, and you will retire to the country to raise steppe-beasts with your wife and children,” I teased. “There is naught to be done about it, though.”
“Just…be kind to her until she leaves, then,” Nion suggested. “You still have time together. You should make the most of it.”
“Savii told me the same thing.” My heart fell slightly at the memory of how I had left her. She had called out my name as I closed the door, but I had known that if I paused for only a moment, I would have been weak enough to stay. “Do you really think it wise, though, to continue leading her on while—”
Leonix burst through the doors of the medical bay, panting and disheveled. Her gray hair hung limply over her brow and her eyes were the yellow color of panic.
“Coplan. Nion. There you are.” She cocked her head towards the hall behind her. “Come. Kloran and Haelian need you. Immediately.”
“About Atlanta’s rescue mission?” If it was Savii they wished to speak about, there was no need for Nion to be present. “Has something gone wrong?”
“Something is always going wrong,” Leonix said with a sigh. “Come along. And be qui
ck about it.”
15
Savannah
Just a few weeks ago, I would have been shaking. But as I stared Daran down from across the room, I knew I couldn’t let myself.
He’d entered my room without asking. Without even knocking. He’d violated my space. I might not have been the most politically savvy person in the universe, but I knew a power play when I saw one.
He was trying to scare me, and I wasn’t going to let him.
Or at least, I wasn’t going to let him see me scared.
“You need to leave.” I stood my ground and placed my hands on my hips. It felt silly, but I’d gone to a self-help seminar years ago. The woman there had called it a power stance, and right now, I could use all the extra power I could get. “You’re violating my privacy, Daran. This is my room and you aren’t welcome in it.”
“Strange…I thought you would at least want to know what I came here to tell you before you threw me out.” Daran turned his head to the side. “Or would you rather not know? Sometimes knowledge can be a terrible thing. Perhaps you’re happier left in the dark.”
I scowled. He was taking a dig at me. Trying to make me feel small and weak. I’d spent too much time in the dark now for a lifetime.
But that didn’t mean anything he told me was worth hearing. Leonix had warned me not to trust him. I trusted her enough to believe it.
“The last time I spoke to you, I walked away feeling like I needed a shower.” I pointed to the door. “Get out.”
“Oh, Savannah. I do love knowing that I am able to get you so…how do you say it? Hot and bothered?”
“Not what I mean.” I pointed again. “Leave.”
“Yes, of course. Whatever you wish.” The chair screeched beneath Daran as he scooted it back across the black tiled floor. “I suppose if you are not willing, your sister will have to be the one instead. A shame, really. She is poorly suited for this task. We would have much rather preferred it to be you.”
“What…do you mean?” I couldn’t help myself. Not when he was throwing mentions of Atlanta around like that.
“No, do not worry yourself with it. As you said, I am violating your privacy already.” He turned to me and bowed curtly. “I will do as you asked and take my leave.”
“Tell me, Daran.” Before he could move toward the door, I stepped in front of it. “You obviously want to. What do you want?”
Daran smiled and placed himself back in the chair, then motioned for me to sit across from him. “It is simple, really. A solution for all, I think.”
“A solution to what?” There was a snarl on my lips as I slumped into the other chair. “Just tell me. You don’t need to draw things out like this.”
“Mm, but drawing things out is half the fun.” Daran’s smile was sinister. Though, I guessed as far as I knew, that was always true. “But as you wish. On behalf of the great and powerful Lady Idria, I would like to offer you a great honor. One that we believe, if you accept it, will be of benefit to all. Do you wish to hear more?”
“I haven’t called Coplan in here to throw you out yet, have I?” I was trying to act tough, but as soon as Coplan’s name left my mouth, Daran snorted and I knew I’d made a mistake.
Crap.
“Yes, you and Coplan have grown…close of late.” My stomach fell as Daran’s black eyes pierced me all the way through. “Too close, perhaps. But it is of no matter to me. In fact, it might be in our favor that he has been so…instructional to you.”
“I don’t like what you’re implying.”
“Then let me say it outright.” Daran brushed the shoulder of his black uniform casually. “I saw Coplan Majari enter your room last night. I saw him leave this morning. I am not a dullard, Savannah. I know what it means when a male and a female spend the night together. I highly doubt he was giving you physical therapy—at least, not any decent kind.”
“We didn’t,” I lied. Convincingly too, I thought. I hoped.
“It does not matter.” Daran waved my words away. “As I said, it may be to everyone’s benefit. Now, you are as familiar with the body of the Lunarian male as you are with those of the Rutharians. I only hope you remember well the things Healer Majari taught you last night. You will likely need them.”
I resented everything about Daran. Coming into my room like this. Teasing me, prodding me with his words, trying to rile me up. He had no right to mention the time I’d spent as a captive to the Rutharians. I’d worked so hard to put all of that behind me. I’d moved through the pain. Who did he think he was, dredging all of that back up for me now, when I was finally feeling like I might be able to be a person again?
“Need them for what?” I asked. My voice sounded strangely ferocious. Weirdly cold.
“What do you think will happen when you go back to Earth, Savannah?” A question for a question. I was getting sick of this fast. “Do you think you will be welcomed back with open arms by your family? Your government?”
“Why not? Isn’t that the plan?”
“It would be.” Daran turned his hand over to study his claws. “If they did not already know what has happened to you. What you have done.”
“What?” The question exploded from my lips so hard, my entire body rocked back. I gripped the edge of the table to steady myself. “What do you mean, what I’ve done?”
“I mean your time with the Rutharians, of course. You may not remember it by the time you return, but Lady Idria felt it prudent to reach out to your government and warn them of the threat being posed to human females there. She was very thorough. Particularly about what she has learned about your, ah…Rutharian adventures, let us call them. And as they were acting as liaisons of sorts between you and that government before your capture, I am certain this information was related to your parents as well. Playing whore for a band of brutal aliens…I suspect your mother and father will find it difficult to even look at you when you return.”
“I wasn’t playing whore! I was chained. Abused. How dare you!” I swallowed back my shame as I tried to reason out what Daran was telling me. None of it made sense—not any sense at all. “Why did you do that? Doesn’t your boss want me to go back to Earth?”
“Of course. But you will be in such danger when you are there again, how could we not warn them? I am certain that your, ah…renown for your obedience and submission to the Rutharians has reached the ears of others of their race. They are not likely to wish to lose such a valuable asset—especially not when you have already been so thoroughly broken in.”
“I’m not broken,” I spat at him. “And you’re a bastard.”
“Ah, yes. I do enjoy that insult. It has caught on on Lunaria, thanks to you humans, you know. So quaint.” Daran chuckled darkly as he crossed his arms over his chest. “But we did not do this out of malice, Savannah. We did it for your safety, and the safety of all other humans as well. Now that your government is aware of the threat, they will be able to better protect you and others from further Rutharian invasions. Of course, not as well as they could if they had the promise of an alliance with Lunaria so our warriors could help, but…” His eyes narrowed, glinting. “I do not suppose anything could be done about that, could it?”
“You tell me.”
“Ah. From questions to orders. I am surprised, Savannah. From the reports I have collected from those who remembered enjoying your company among the Rutharians, you were never so defiant among them. My, how Healer Majari has changed you. Perhaps not for the best.” Daran placed his hands on the table and leaned forward. “But we shall see. Are you ready to hear Lady Idria’s offer yet?”
“I’ve been ready since you came in, you…you…” I frantically searched for an insult. He’d already made fun of me for calling him a bastard, so… “Jerk,” I finished lamely.
Daran laughed. “Perhaps. But you, dear Savannah—if you return to Earth, you will have less freedom than ever before because of the danger you are in. Worse, your family, your government, any male who may have wished to marry you�
��they will all know what you have been through. Every indignity. Every horrible detail. On top of that, you will be living on a planet largely defenseless to the threat of future Rutharian invasions. Your entire species will be living in wait for the next abduction. Every female on your world will carry on with life in fear. But…what if there was another way for you? Another life?”
“Since you and your Lady Idria have ruined that one so completely,” I snapped at him. “Stop. Stalling. Either make your stupid offer or get out of my room.”
“Fair.” Daran nodded in acceptance. “I am offering you an alternative. You will not have to return to your polluted, weak, corrupt planet. You will not have to live in shame. You will not have to give up your memories if you do not wish to. You seem to have worked through your trauma well already, and…I do understand that you may now have some memories you wish to keep.”
Coplan. I wouldn’t have to forget him. It was almost too good to be true. But…
“What do you want in return?”
“I am not done telling you what you will receive, though,” Daran said with a smile. “We are also willing to broker an alliance between Lunaria and Earth. If you agree, Lunaria will provide defenses for your planet against the Rutharians. No human female will ever be abducted by them again. That would be nice, would it not?”
“And in exchange?”
“Earth will enter the intergalactic slave trade.” I scowled, and Daran reached out to pat my hand in a way I supposed he thought was reassuring. “Do not fear, Savannah. This word, slave…it is a poor translation at best. No Earthan woman would be forced into anything. It is the simple matter of willingly entering a contract to be artificially inseminated with Lunarian seed. I believe, for your people, the term surrogate would be more appropriate. The contracts are finite, and any female entering one would be compensated handsomely. It is seen as a great honor, truly, to offer one’s body to save the population of another race. Their offspring would be placed among the noble houses on Lunaria. The cubs would grow up to be lords and ladies, never wanting for anything. Leaders of a new generation.”