by Bella J
“It’s not—”
I placed my thumb over her red lips, smothering her words. “I know it feels insane, and it’s crazy, but by God, it feels so fucking right.” I pulled back an inch, looking her square in the eye. “Tell me you don’t feel it too? Tell me you don’t feel how fucking right this is?”
The way she bit her lip, her eyes gleaming as she stared back at me, I knew she couldn’t. There was no way in hell she could have been able to deny that there was this wild, powerful pull between us. A chemistry that was too damn powerful to ignore.
“Dahlia, I know you have demons chasing you. We all do.” I placed my hand on her chest, slowly tracing a fingertip between her breasts, pulling her shirt down the middle to reveal the lotus flower inked on her skin. “But like the lotus flower, you can submerge yourself into the dirtiest, darkest corners of this world and stay there for however long. But when you’re with me, you turn into this beautiful creature—unblemished, unscarred, and just fucking perfect. Last night proved that.”
“Onyx,” she reached out, placing a palm on my cheek, “God knows, I want to be with you. I really do.”
“Then be. Don’t run from me.”
Licking her lips, she pulled her hand away from my face, diverting her eyes. Whatever it was that kept her from staying with me was slowly starting to infect our time together, and there was no way in hell I would let her run from me. Not now. I needed her to open up and tell me who or what these demons were that refused to let her be with me.
“Come on.” I grabbed her wrist.
“Where are we going?”
“Just come with me.” I walked outside to my hog. “Get on.”
“What?”
“Get on. I want to take you for a ride.”
She pursed her lips and crossed her arms. “Do I look like fender fluff?”
I snickered. “Just get the fuck on, would you?”
Her eyes narrowed, brows slanted inward. “Fine.”
I was sure I had a grin the size of Japan on my face. Climbing on my hog, I waited for her to get on behind me before I started the engine. The second she wrapped her arms around me, I could swear to God I felt my entire universe shift, like something just fucking clicked in place. I wasn’t a unicorns and rainbows kind of guy, and I always believed fate was for pussies. But this moment right here was powerful enough to make a man like me hope like fuck there was such a thing as fate, and that her name was engraved into mine.
“Where you taking me?” She leaned her head on my shoulder.
“You just hold on tight, buttercup.”
Revving the engine, I pulled onto the street and burned rubber. I knew Wraith wouldn’t have a problem with speeding, so I didn’t hold back. That was one of the things I loved about being with her—she had the same wild spirit I did.
We kept riding for miles, and she didn’t loosen her grip around my waist once. This felt so right, having her on my hog, her arms around me, her breath in my neck. I didn’t want the ride to stop, wishing it could last forever.
Slowing down, I pulled to the side of the road, next to a view of Brighton Beach, and switched off the ignition.
“What are we doing here?” She moved her arms as she tried to get off, but I grabbed her wrist, keeping it place.
“I come here whenever shit gets too much. You know, just to breathe.”
She didn’t say anything as she rested her chin in my shoulder, staring at the view in front of us.
“Tell me.”
Her thighs shifted beside me. “Tell you what?”
“Tell me who hurt you. Tell me your secrets.”
For the longest time, we just sat there, her breathing mixing with the sound of the waves. I didn’t let go of her wrist, making sure she didn’t remove her arms from around me.
She sighed against my neck. “My world is dark, Onyx.”
“So is mine.”
“I’m not talking about crews, or clubs, or gun wars. I’m talking about my life.”
I tightened my grip around her wrist. “You connected with Neon last night. I saw it. I saw the way you looked at her. It was like you felt her pain.”
“I did. I still feel it.”
I brought her hand up to my mouth, placing a kiss on the top of her hand. “Tell me your secrets, Dahlia Knight.”
“I don’t want you to carry that burden as well.”
“It’s not up to you to decide which burdens I carry and which I don’t.”
“Onyx,” she nestled her face into my back, and I felt her tightening her arms around me, “I’m poison.”
“I don’t care. In fact, I don’t give a fuck how toxic you think you are. I want you, and I will go on a rampage through hell if that means I can have you.”
I looked out over the ocean, the sun high in the sky, the ripples in the waves shimmering like millions of diamonds.
“Someone in my past hurt me,” she started. “Hurt me real bad.”
My chest ached, rage starting to bubble up to the surface.
“It hurt me in such a way that I was never able to handle a man’s touch…not until you.”
My ribs cracked, and every hair on my body stood up. “Who?” I gritted out.
“It doesn’t matter. They don’t exist anymore.”
“They?” I pinched my eyes closed, desperate to not lose my shit. She was opening up because I pushed her to. If I lost it now, she’d never tell me anything again.
I felt her chest expand against my back as she took a deep breath. “Yeah…they.”
“So, they’re dead?”
“Yeah.”
“Did you—”
“No. No, I didn’t.” She paused, and it was like a heavy cloud settled over us even though the sun was burning down the summer heat. “But my brother did.”
I took a few seconds to process what she just told me. She didn’t have to spit it out word for word for me to know how she was hurt. I also knew there were so much more to her past, but I wouldn’t push any more today. At least I got something—a puzzle piece toward solving the secrets she kept buried.
I let go of her wrist and held her arm as she climbed off the bike. I got off too and reached for her, pulling her closer and settling my hand on her hip. “Listen to me very carefully.” I looked her dead in the eye. “I don’t give a flying fuck about your past. You got that?”
Radiant irises stared at me, unshed tears shimmering in the corners. “I told you, I’ll only ruin you.”
“I don’t care.”
“But I do.” She placed her palms against my chest, fingers sliding down my cut. “I care about you, Onyx. Too much. And what you have with your crew—”
“Listen, I know all this club business can be really shitty at times, but I can be a president of a crew and still be your man.”
A pretty pink blush spread across her cheeks, and her complexion turned to a healthy glow under the summer sun. “It’s too risky.”
“Why?”
She bit her lip, her attention dropping to where her hands touched my chest.
“Wraith, I’ll do everything in my fucking power to protect you. I know being with me comes with a shitload of risks, but I swear to God there is no man strong enough to take you from me.”
“You hardly know me.”
“I don’t care. All that matters is that I know I want you. There’s no guarantees, I know that.” I tucked a stray strand of her hair behind her ear. “But I think if we don’t stick around to see where this is heading, we’d regret it.”
She closed her eyes, and I could feel her hesitation roll off her in waves of confusion.
When she opened her eyes, her irises were swirling with uncertainty, beautiful lips pulled in a straight line. “I’ll only hurt you,” she said, like she already regretted it.
I shook my head. “You don’t know that.”
“Yes. I do.”
“I’m a big boy, Wraith. I’ll risk it.”
“Why? Would you want to risk anything where I’m conc
erned?”
“Because I would rather have you for a moment to realize it won’t work than not have you at all and always wonder what if,” I placed my palms on her cheeks, “what if it would have worked.”
With parted lips she stared up at me. “You’re the president of the American Street Kings. A crew—”
“—which you’ll have no problem fitting in to.”
“Onyx—”
“Wraith, stop looking for excuses not to jump into the deep end with me. Just go with it. Stop running and just be with me. No promises, no guarantees.” I pulled her closer, her body flush against mine, the summer breeze wafting raven strands into her face. “One day at a time, that’s all I’m asking.”
Her lips pursed as she chewed the inside of her cheek, and I practically heard the wheels turn inside her head. Pushing herself up on her toes, she placed a gentle kiss against my lips, her mouth lingering on mine, our breaths colliding. Jesus Christ, I had never experienced this before. I had never wanted a woman as much as I wanted her. It was like our souls were connected, and the thought of not being with her, of not having her was powerful enough to fuck with my head in the worst possible way.
My lips ached when she pulled away, desperate for more of her taste. And as our gazes met, she smiled, but it didn’t reach her eyes. “You’re a good man, Onyx. I can see why she cares for you.”
“Who?”
“Alyx.”
I cocked a brow. “What the fuck does Alyx have to do with this?”
“Nothing,” she shook her head lightly, “she just made it clear that she didn’t want you to get hurt.”
“What? Why—”
“Calm down. She was subtle about it, and I get it. I get that you’re all like family, something I’ve never had.”
“Wraith, I know you’ve been hurt. I know there’s demons in your past, but don’t let it keep you away from me.”
She stepped back a little, and I hated the distance between us. “Just…take me back. Please.”
“Wraith, don’t. You’re pulling away again.” I reached for her, but she moved out of my reach, like she was afraid I’d burn her.
“I need time.”
Instantly, hope flared. Those words were better than a fucking no. “Okay.” I placed my hands on my hips, staring at her with intent. “Just know that if you disappear on me, I will look for you. And I won’t stop until I’ve found you. You hear me?” I stepped up to her and grabbed her chin between my fingers, lifting her face to mine. “I will turn this city upside down for you, woman. I swear to God.”
Chapter Seventeen
Wraith
I went straight home—to the Python clubhouse after the ride I took with Onyx. My head was a mess, my heart in chaos. Every second I spent with him I felt him claw his way deeper into my heart. He was so sure I was the woman he wanted. But he didn’t know me—know who I really was. Everything he thought he knew was a lie. A lie that started the very first second he laid eyes on me. And on my way back home, his every word echoing in my mind, I was convinced that the certainty in his eyes was just a ripple effect of me pretending to be someone I wasn’t.
Even though it physically hurt to walk through the halls of my brother’s compound, knowing my life was nothing but a giant hole of nothing, I was smart enough to realize that it would never change. My life would never change. There was no hope for Onyx and me, because he would never accept me if I had to tell him the truth. And I could no longer live this lie. I could no longer look into his eyes, see the affection he felt for me reflect in his irises without me feeling a gut-wrenching guilt strong enough to tear me apart.
So, this was it. I had no choice but to move on—away and without Onyx, a man I had been deceiving since the very beginning. This was my life, and the sooner I made peace with it, the better. And after I got this job done for Slither tonight, I planned on telling him that I would no longer be his spy on the fucking Kings. I would do all his other jobs forever and a day—but not the Kings. Not Onyx.
Never again.
The red dress I wore was way too tight. But Glenn—or rather, Slither—insisted I wear it. Said red was this guy’s favorite color, and the tighter, the better. In the past, I didn’t give situations like these a second thought. It was part of my life, part of me paying my way around here. My way of contributing to the crew. Slither didn’t want me riding with them as a crew member, said women weren’t allowed to wear the Python patch. And he definitely didn’t want me being fender fluff since, well…I was his sister. Everyone around here knew they’d be as good as dead if they touched me. If they didn’t believe it, they were more than welcome to ask the corpse currently serving as fish bait at the bottom of the ocean—the body of a man whose throat Slither cut because he thought my ass was fair game for crew members. Needless to say, no other man here even looked my way after that. I was like the local leprosy patient with everyone walking circles around me. But it didn’t bother me. The less I had to deal with guys walking around with their dicks on their foreheads, the better. And my job here didn’t bother me either…until today. For the last ten years, I had been too grateful for what Slither had done for me to doubt my place here. If fucking clients, VIPs to the Pythons, or anyone Slither needed money, business, or information from was what it took to show my gratitude and loyalty, I did it. It still didn’t compensate for what my brother had done for me all those years ago. But today, I struggled. I struggled to put my game face on, to get my head in the right space to do what needed to be done. With every click of my heel against the concrete, doubt dug its claws deeper into my mind. I tried to focus on the profile Slither had given me. The man I was supposed to impress enough to ensure he didn’t take his business elsewhere. According to my brother, this man was the most important client the Pythons had ever had, and my performance tonight better be a game changer. With my dark hair straightened and heavy make-up illuminating my skin and lengthening my eyelashes, I was hardly recognizable as the Wraith everyone knew.
Slither waited by the door, his smile stretching from ear to ear. His split tongue and snakelike appearance never bothered me. To the world, it was a man trying to be a monster—a freak who wanted to look as ugly on the outside as he was on the inside. But I knew what the motivation was behind every tattooed scale, and the tongue torn in two.
“You look gorgeous, little sister.”
I smiled. “Thanks.” I glanced at the club door and up to the neon pink sign that read ‘Jitters.’
I cocked a brow at my brother. “A strip club?”
“The Sixes own it.”
“Of course they do,” I muttered and rolled my eyes.
Slither grabbed my elbow and pulled me close, fingers digging into my flesh. “You better behave tonight, little sis. Or I swear to God I’ll—”
“I always behave,” I bit out before he could finish his threat. One thing about words, they could never be taken back. I didn’t want Slither to go there, to say something that would wreck us. He was all I had left in this world.
Whiskey eyes lingered on mine, his hand gripping my elbow loosening slightly, a gentle fingertip tracing circles on my skin. “You look just like her.”
“Don’t say that.”
“It’s true. You’re just as beautiful as she was.”
I jerked my arm from his grasp, ice smothering the blood in my veins. “Why are you saying this?”
“Because it’s true.” He smiled. “I dreamt of her the other night, and when I woke up, I realized you look just like her.”
“Stop.” Unease crawled all over my skin. I didn’t like the look in his eyes while he talked about her, comparing me to her.
Slither pulled a palm over his tattooed head and took a breath like he had to take a second to pull his shit together. “You better not fuck this up. If you ever had to impress anyone, this guy is it. You need to pull out all the stops tonight, do you understand? Don’t disappoint me.”
I nodded, trying my best not to show how conflicted I was. The
last thing I needed was for Slither to think I was doubting my own loyalty to him. Especially after what the Kings claimed my brother did to Neon—the woman whose screams shook the early hours of this morning. The things Onyx said they did to her, I couldn’t believe it was my brother. Not Glenn.
But maybe Slither?
I knew there was a darkness in him. I carried that same darkness. But I was sure we were both strong enough not to let it consume us, and that we could control it enough for it to numb the pain of the past and make sure nothing hurt us ever again.
I shifted from one leg to the other, the summer breeze caressing my legs with its warm fingers. “At least tell me why this Crow guy is so important to you.”
“To us,” he corrected. “Important to us. The Sixes have more money than you can imagine. Their connections go straight into the motherfucking White House. If we want someone on our side, we want the Sixes.”
“What business do we have with them?”
Slither tsk’d. “Dear sister, you know better than to ask me that.”
Yeah. I did know better. He never discussed club business with me, only giving me information I needed, like the profile he gave me of Crow.
Cassian “Crow” Blackwood. President of the Sixes for the last eleven years.
Killing was as easy as breathing for this man, running his empire with an iron fist. As far as bad guys went, this man was the worst.
Sexual tastes? Hardcore.
Hard limits? He was the fucking hard limit.
A simple blowjob or quick fuck wasn’t going to cut it with this guy. If I wanted to impress him the way Slither wanted me to, I had to bring my A-game and show no fear. Only confidence. Complete submission.
“Here they come.” Slither turned, and I heard the roaring engines of their Ducatis in the distance. Unlike other crews around here the Sixes were all about speed and burning rubber. To be part of their crew your ride had to be a black Ducati, and nothing else. Whenever they went on a run, they looked like a sea of black, speeding past in a blur of velocity. With sweaty palms and a racing heart, I watched as they rode toward us.