by Nina Lincoln
“You do too,” I whisper.
I may deserve a better dad, but I won the lotto with Colt. I just hope what we have can withstand the tests constantly shoved in our faces because every time we turn around, it’s something different, and I’m starting to despair of ever having a normal relationship.
Maybe it’s me. I clearly draw the drama. I mean, case in point, we’re snuggled up waiting for Teddy to see if he can track down the location of a picture sent by my stalker. Yeah, nothing normal about that.
“Are you going to write him back?”
“No. If I do, he wins. Let him rot in there knowing he can’t force me to do shit.”
Colt’s mouth tips in a smirk, and he whispers, before placing his warm lips against mine, “That’s my girl.”
Shivering under the gentle caress, I’m about to open for a deeper connection when Teddy says sarcastically behind us, “Am I interrupting?”
Squeaking with embarrassment, I jump back, my cheeks heating a thousand degrees.
From the corner of my eye, I see Colt frown and rush in before he can say anything, “Of course not. Any news?”
Teddy looks between us with a frown before saying, “I found the location, but it’s not good.”
Both excitement and dread jump through my veins. He found something! Maybe this can all finally be over.
Shakily, I say, “Teddy, you’re a genius!”
He smiles smugly, but it fades to a sad frown when Colt huffs beside me and demands, “What did you find?”
With a mercurial glare for Colt, Teddy says, “The location led back to Nate.”
“What?” I gasp, even having postulated that it might be him did not prepare me for the betrayal I feel. I thought he was my friend. I thought…
Colt swears and steps around me, heading for the door without looking back.
“Ramie!” he bellows.
Bewildered, I stare at his retreating back before following him as Ramie appears from down the hall quickly with a concerned expression.
“Take Finn home and stay with her until I’m done,” he demands.
“Done with what?” she asks.
While I simultaneously say, “No! Colt!”
But he ignores me and sails out the door.
With a huff, I turn to the curious gaze of Teddy, both terrified and annoyed by Colt’s quick exit, as he wheels up beside me, and we stand at the threshold, watching him drive away angrily.
Silently, I pray I’ll see him alive again.
*****
Ramie brings me home, and we while away the time, chatting and watching television, but I don't hear most of the conversation because I’m too caught up in the fear clenching my belly.
Colt doesn’t return any of my texts, and eventually, Ramie and I pass out on the couch, our limbs splayed awkwardly around each other.
The following day, I text him again, but he doesn’t answer, and I have no choice but to report the text to the police, leaving me worried about him as well.
While we wait for the police to arrive, I receive a text from Teddy, freaking out, and when I call him, I’m surprised to see he’s got a black eye and fat lip.
“Teddy! What happened?” I exclaim.
“I got jumped. Don't worry about it, Finn. I’m fine,” he says grimly.
Dropping my eyes, I wonder - could this be another warning from my fan? From Nate? Bitterly, I fight the tears, feeling utterly helpless against all of this chaos. Colt’s incommunicado, the police are on their way, and I don't know if it's Nate who’s been harassing me or not.
Everything feels like it's about to come to a head, and I’m sitting on my couch doing nothing. Fuck.
“Teddy, do you think...it could have been him?” I whisper.
His eyes drop, and my stomach follows suit. “What, Teddy?”
“I don't know who it was. It could have been anyone. The dick was wearing a hoodie, and I couldn't see his face.”
Fuck. Nodding because I don't have words, I refrain from saying what I know because this was most definitely him. But what can we do? With any luck, the police will apprehend Nate before anything further happens, but now I need to see Colt more than ever. I need to know he’s okay. I just...ugh.
“Oh, Teddy. I’m so sorry,” I say, regret barreling through me because I even thought to put him in this situation. I knew better...and I did it anyway.
“Finn! Don't worry about me. I’m fine, just a couple of bruises. Did you find out anything about Nate?”
“No, the police are on their way,” I mutter, wiping a tear from my eye.
His eyes soften as he says softly, “And Colt?”
“I don't know where he is, but I hope he’s not with Nate,” I say fiercely.
Teddy’s eyes take on a gleam, and he says quietly, “Well, if you've been trying to get a hold of him...he left his phone here.”
“What!”
No wonder he hasn't been returning my texts and calls. For a moment, I’m relieved he’s not ignoring me, but then it morphs back into worry because if he’s stuck somewhere, then he can't fucking call for help.
“Okay, I’ll swing by and pick it up,” I say, ending the call.
Of course, after another useless conversation with the cops, they confiscate my phone, leaving me with no way to communicate with Colt, not that he has his phone anyway.
Ramie ran home to pick up Colt’s phone during the ordeal, while Maggie sat beside me grim-faced and pale. She doesn’t want me to go to school, but I’m hoping Colt will be there, so I convince her to let me go, promising to stay inside the building.
Finally, she agrees, and I rush to school, but Colt’s not there either, and clutching his phone like a lifeline, I hide away in the bathroom and lock myself in a stall. Where could he be? Surely, he realizes he doesn't have his phone by now?
I don’t have his password, but I see, once again, he’s got a bunch of new texts, and I scroll through them, hoping someone has said something that will lead me back to him.
There are numerous texts and missed calls from me, a few from his mother, his friends, and an unknown number.
Melania: Hey, Baby, you still there?
Rolling my eyes, I exit out of that one, refusing to look at the new picture even though my stomach is full of bile at the thought that still, still, he’s getting texts and offers from girls. Why hasn’t he told them about me?
Dirk: Where you at?
George: you find Nate yet?
Unknown: I need you, text me a time to meet
Need him for what? What the hell is going on? Am I missing something? Who the fuck needs him, and for what?
Fuck, focus Finn, there’s more important stuff going on right now, but still…
By lunch, I’m crawling out of my skin with worry. I don’t know if Colt is alive, which has me sick to my stomach and fighting back vomit, but also, there’s a niggling feeling in the back of my head over the text from the unknown number. What could it mean?
I’m tempted to go to the bookstore since I don’t know where he lives, and I have no other way of contacting him, but I promised Maggie I’d stay put.
Absently I stare at Hayden as a kernel of an idea forms - if I go with him, I won’t be alone, right?
“What?” he asks grimly, his normally smirking facade gone.
Come to think of it, he’s suspiciously missing a side piece that he’d typically be sucking face with by now. Whatever.
“Do you know where Colt lives?”
“Of course, I do,” he mutters.
“Can we go?” I ask eagerly.
“Now?”
“Yes, now.”
“Finn…”
“Hayden…”
He gives me an intimidating frown, but I ignore it. “I’m worried. What if something is wrong?”
“And what’s going to his house going to do?”
“Hayden,” I say sharply.
Rolling his eyes, he says, “I’m starting to regret knowing you.”
“
Whatever,” I mutter.
*****
Neither Colt nor his family is home, which means I can’t even ask his mom or sister if they’ve seen him since last night. His truck is missing, and frustrated, I sit next to Hayden and stare at the house adjacent to the bookstore, which was a surprise but makes sense.
Unfortunately, the store is also closed.
“What now? Princess,” he says mockingly.
Ignoring him, I say absently, “Where would he be?”
“We could check the fort?”
“What fort?”
He shrugs, “It’s an abandoned train car we always called our fort. Played there as kids. Hung out and got wasted later.”
“Do you think he could be there?” I ask, hopefully.
“Haven’t been there in years,” he says.
“Oh.”
“It’s worth a shot. If he was trying to track down Nate, he might have told him to go there.”
With that, he pulls away from the curb, and silently I pray he’s there and alive because the longer he doesn’t respond to our overtures, the grimmer the reality becomes.
After an excruciating ten-minute drive through the town's back streets, Hayden pulls up to a vacant lot, but there’s nothing but unkempt grass and cracked asphalt. “Where?”
“It’s through the trees,” Hayden says.
Stepping from the car, a frisson of caution slides down my spine, followed by a trickle of sweat. This doesn’t feel right, but if it’s Nate who’s my stalker, why would I be concerned?
Does it matter? I have to find Colt, and if he’s back there somewhere, he may need my help.
Following behind Hayden grimly, I glance around wildly. I’m so fucking scared, my body is twitching, and the bile from before is pushing at my throat painfully.
When the hair on the nape of my neck stands on end, I slow down, unwilling to ignore what my body is telling me even as Hayden continues, not bothering to look back.
Glancing around, I see nothing but trees, and I can’t stay here alone, besides I’m eager to see if Colt is back there. So, with a sigh, I keep going, although I fear I’m making a big mistake.
About a hundred yards in, he slows and passes into a clearing where an old, rusted train car sits, surrounded by trees, fallen logs, and sprouts of new growth.
Before the car's open doors sits a small fire pit, hastily formed with small rocks and still containing old beer cans and garbage.
“Yo, Colt?” Hayden calls out, stepping toward the dark interior.
Stopping at the edge of the tree line, I freeze as he steps up to the car, and his entire body goes rigid. For a moment, I stand in complete terror, praying to whatever god exists that Colt is alive before silently, I step up behind him, staggering a little when he backs into me.
Over his shoulder, I see Nate sitting inside with his head hung low. He’s on his knees, sniffling quietly, and beside him, staring at me with wide empty eyes full of accusation, is Sarah.
Her limbs are splayed awkwardly, her skin a disturbing shade of blue, but most horrifically, her mouth is open on the last scream she ever uttered, with the stub of what was once her tongue bulging within.
Gasping, I cover my mouth and moan, turning away as vomit spews from my lips.
Over my shoulder, I hear Nate say, “I didn’t do it.”
Spinning back around, I wipe my sour mouth and stare into his sky-blue eyes, filled with tortured pain. “You believe me? Right, Finn? I didn’t do it.”
He shifts on his knees, and my eyes drop to his hand where he holds a knife, his hands clenching and unclenching around it methodically.
Idly, I feel sweat trickle down my spine and wonder not for the first time if I’m not losing my fucking mind.
“Finn, take my phone. Go back to the car and call the police,” Hayden says, handing me his phone without breaking his gaze from Nate.
“No,” Nate says, holding out his hands, the knife he’s tightly clutching shining in the sunshine, but for the tip covered in dried blood.
Oh god. Did Nate stab Sarah?
“Go!” Hayden barks.
Spinning on my feet, I race from the clearing as though the hounds of hell are digging at my heels. I don’t feel the sting as branches slap at my face and tear at my hair, and when I trip over a limb, I keep going despite the pain shooting up my ankle.
Images of Sarah’s ghastly face in death race over my vision as I run toward the light, sobs barking from my numb lips. In the distance, I see Hayden’s car, and I emerge from the trees with a gasp, falling to my knees.
Retching once more, I dial the police with trembling fingers and give them an utterly hysterical run down of what’s waiting beyond the trees.
And when the phone buzzes in my hand, I jump and gasp, fighting back another sob. Get your shit together, Finn.
With a deep breath, I glance at the screen and see an incoming text from Colt via Dirk’s phone, and relief floods through me wildly.
Dirk: This is Colt. I heard you were looking for me...I’m fine. Where’s Finn?
Without thought, I hang up on the 911 operator after muttering grimly, “Please just hurry.”
Now that I know he’s okay and Nate’s sitting beside Sarah’s dead body like a total fucking psychopath, I have the violent urge to hear Colt’s voice.
Dialing Dirk’s phone with shaky fingers, I wait impatiently for someone to pick up on the other side.
“Where’s Finn?” Colt demands as soon as he answers.
“Colt…” I sob, tears of relief filling my eyes, followed by guilt. Poor Sarah lies dead, not far away, and I’m celebrating in my fucking head.
“Finn? Why do you have Hayden’s phone? Where are you?”
Ignoring his stern tone, I mutter, “We’re at the fort. We found Nate.”
“Fuck! Why would he take you there? What did you see, Finn?”
“See? What do you mean? I saw Sarah’s dead fucking body,” I cry.
“Fuck! I’m on my way,” he says fiercely, and before I can respond, he’s gone.
Taking a deep breath, I stare at the trees blankly, replaying back Colt’s words in my head. He couldn’t have known Sarah was here - I didn’t mention it at first.
So, what was he afraid I might see?
*****
The police arrive soon after with sirens blaring and guns blazing, quickly taking Nate into custody. As they lead him away, he looks at me with pitiful eyes and lunges in my direction, and with my heart pounding wildly, I turn away, tamping down the sadness I feel for him in his clearly insane state.
It’s over. It’s finally over.
Leaning my head against Hayden’s car, I bite back a sob and smile. I can finally breathe, and the air tastes so very sweet.
Colt pulls up fifteen minutes later, barely putting the truck in park before he’s striding toward me and pulling me into his arms.
The detective interviewing me gives him a rude look, but he ignores it as he hugs me tightly and smiling from ear to ear, I clutch him fiercely, repeating in my head - it’s over. It’s finally over, and I no longer have to worry about whether my stalker, no Nate, sees my affection for Colt. We’re free.
“Are you okay?” he whispers in my ear, and I only have time to nod before he’s pulled away by another detective who interviews him grimly.
After giving our statements, we’re allowed to go home. Since we’re all eighteen, we refuse to have our parents called and instead take off with warnings not to go far.
Colt drives me home, and I hum contentedly, snuggled under his arm, finally feeling as though I can breathe. I’m saddened by Sarah’s death and even Nate’s state, but I can’t regret the fact that it’s now over.
Smiling, he squeezes me to him and says, “Relieved, Princess?”
“Yes,” I exclaim. I’m so relieved – my body is noodly.
“Me too,” he says, kissing me on the forehead.
“I love you,” I whisper, my chest expanding painfully with love when he says hus
kily, “I love you, too.”
*****
The following week is quiet. Even though it doesn't feel right, we go to school weird in the aftermath of what we witnessed in the trees, as though the mundane act of tests and studying is juvenile.
Now we know there’s a whole wide world out there full of darkness fighting to claw its way through the light.
I haven't heard much more about Nate beyond that he’s in custody and the police continue to find more evidence of his strange obsession.
Having refused to report his assault to the police, Teddy’s healing up nicely. I guess it doesn't matter with all the shit piling up on Nate anyway, and I’m only glad I don't have to worry about him hurting my friends anymore.
The finality of it being over feels weird but good.
Colt and I are inseparable, and whenever possible, sneak away to make love. I think it’s our way of feeling alive in the wake of Sarah’s death and Nate’s evil plans.
When we’re connected, nothing can come between us.
But after, when we’re snuggled together in the afterglow, I sense a quiet sort of desperation about him that leaves me wondering...about us. About him.
I still can't shake the feeling he was hiding something from me, but what? And why? He promised there was nothing more. Shouldn't I take him at face value?
Except I keep circling back around to the mysterious text message, which I never asked Colt about it, and when I gave him back the phone that day, he didn’t comment on.
It could be nothing, but I’m going out of my mind with worry because I recognize the shuttered look he gets in his eyes when he feels backed into a corner, and I don’t know if, after everything, it’s about me.
So, when he gruffly informs me, he has to work at the bookstore over the weekend, I give him a heated kiss goodbye and sadly watch as he goes, noting the grim look on his face.
Once he’s gone, I make my way back to the train car, dreading what I might find and hoping it’s nothing but my wild imagination.
Pulling onto the road, I recall our whispered conversation from the night before, where he pulled me close and convinced me I was silly, teasing me mercilessly until I cried mercy. After which, we made love again, his fierce bright eyes staring at me intently
Shivering in my car, I smile slightly, but even so, his choice of words lingers.