Ungifted

by Kelly Oram

“I was trying to give you a gift, you see. I was giving you immortality. I was trying to share my life with you. I meant to give you my heart along with everything else I have. Had things gone they way they were supposed to, you would have felt no fear. You would have wanted me as much as I want you. It would have made you happy.

  “I am so grateful that what happened didn’t leave you broken. I have seen many humans unable to bear much less. When you accepted the truth, I knew it was a miracle. I knew I couldn’t waste the opportunity it presented. I brought you here tonight to beg your understanding. Please, Grace, please try to forgive me.”

  He looked so earnest, so desperate, that I did my best to really be objective. “I…” It took me a minute to gather the right words. “I think I do understand.”

  Andrew’s body sagged as he let out a breath of relief.

  “But just because you only did what’s in your nature to do, doesn’t mean that it was okay.”

  I swallowed hard when Andrew frowned at me. How could I help him understand how I felt without making him angry? “Even if your charms had worked on me, it would have been a lie. You would have stolen me from my life, and I would have had no choice.”

  “But you would never have known the difference.”

  “And my dad? I suppose he wouldn’t have cared when I disappeared?”

  Andrew clenched his hand into a tight fist. “I saw how your father cares for you!” he hissed. His anger disappeared as immediately as it had come, and he brushed my cheek as if he could feel the pain of the slap I’d received.

  I gasped when I realized he knew my dad had hit me. “How did you—?”

  “A magic spell, love. From the moment I left you in the hospital I came straight home and watched you.”

  “You spied on me?” I shivered. That had to be the creepiest thing I’d ever heard. “You used magic to—” I gasped again as a new thought occurred to me. “You can use magic? I didn’t think vampires could—”

  “We can’t.” Andrew chuckled. “Not directly. However, vampires often work together with magic users. Our immortal blood can be a very powerful tool. It has magical properties that can enhance a spell. Though, it was not powerful enough in your case. Even with my blood my patroness could not place a watcher’s spell on you. We had to place one on your home and your school instead. It was maddening. There were too many gaps where I could not see you.”

  “You’ve been watching my house and my school?” I asked, horrified.

  “Yes, love. Of course.”

  “Are those spells still there?”

  “Yes,” Andrew admitted a little more hesitantly.

  “Take them off now!” I screeched.

  Andrew was taken aback by my outburst. I’d been so scared around him up until now. “I most certainly will not, Grace. You need my protection.”

  I understood something then. “You know that someone’s trying to kill me!”

  Andrew sighed, but there was something about that sigh that made me think he knew a lot more than I did. “Please!” I cried somewhat hysterically. “You’ve been watching me! What do you know? Russ says it’s a really powerful witch. Would your witch friend know who might want me dead? Can we ask her?”

  “Grace, love, calm down.”

  “I can’t!” I screamed. I’d been on such an emotional roller coaster this week that even this tiny shred of hope made me desperate. I grabbed his shirt with both hands and clung to him. “I’m so tired of being scared, Andrew. I’m trying so hard to accept your world, but it’s terrifying! Please! If you know something…” I hiccuped and my voice became small. “Please, help me.”

  Andrew looked down at me as if he wanted to hold back but simply couldn’t resist giving me what I was begging for. “Calm yourself, Grace,” he whispered in a voice like velvet. “You are safe, love. No one is trying to kill you. I promise you that.”

  “But they are!” I insisted. “Why do you think I was at the hospital the day I met you?”

  “You were there because of me.” Andrew’s entire body sagged. He looked down at the cast on my leg with eyes full of so much guilt and grief that I froze. “I did this to you.”

  “Y-you d-did this?” I stammered. “I don’t understand.”

  Andrew sighed heavily. “I was the one who ordered your death. It was my patroness who tried to kill you.”

  “What?”

  “I’ll never forgive myself, Grace. I didn’t want to have to tell you this, but I can’t stand to see you so needlessly frightened. You are safe, love. I swear it. No one is trying to hurt you anymore. It is actually the opposite. You are safer than you have ever been because you are now under the protection of my coven.”

  “But…why? Why did you want me dead? I didn’t even know about the supernatural then.”

  Andrew sighed. “I have spies within the resistance, love. I know their plans. They have intentions where you’re concerned, and I was afraid of them succeeding.”

  I still didn’t understand. I was so confused that I wasn’t even sure which questions to ask.

  “It is the goal of the resistance to make the supernatural world known to the humans again. There are very few vampires who would agree with this goal, and I myself am not one of those few. Humans might one day be able to accept a magic user or an angel—or even a werewolf. But no matter how gentle and understanding my kind may be, we will always have a need for human blood.”

  I shuddered. “You have to admit, it’s a legitimate concern,” I mumbled.

  Andrew laughed at me. “There is no need for humans to fear us. We do not kill when we feed. It can be done, of course, but it takes great effort to drain a person completely. All we do is tire someone enough to put them to sleep for a while, and because of our vampiric charms they never even know what happened. It causes no harm at all, and is actually a very pleasurable experience for the human.”

  “Oh,” I said. Because, what else was there to say?

  “However, for all of that, and no matter what truce was made between supernaturals and humans, my kind would never be accepted. We would be hunted until extinction.”

  “But what does that have to do with me?”

  Andrew gave me a sad smile. “Your father is about to become one of the most powerful humans in the world. Your best friend’s father and your nephilim’s uncle are two of the highest leaders within the supernatural resistance. They know all about you. Even before you knew the truth of us they intended to use you to get to your father.

  “You were different—more comfortable with supernatural children than your own kind. They believed you could be swayed. They believed they could use your relationships with the wolves and the angel to get their people in positions of power when your father made the transition into the White House.”

  My fear had been replaced with astonishment at Andrew’s confession, but now it was starting to turn into anger. “So you thought that it was better to murder me on the off chance that I might someday help Cynthia’s dad get a job in the White House?”

  Andrew’s face was grave. “It was not a decision I made lightly. I value human life—especially the innocent. When it became obvious that your father would indeed win this election, I sent my people to see if the reports about you were true. Your loyalty to the she-wolf and the devotion your nephilim shows you do much credit to your character, but it proved that perhaps the resistance was right about you. And they were! You have impossibly accepted our world. Your relationship with the wolves has only strengthened since you learned the truth, and your bond to your nephilim—or should I say warrior—is far more powerful than anyone could have imagined. You would be a very powerful tool in the hands of the resistance.”

  “Then why didn’t you finish the job?” I asked bitterly. “That’s why you were at the hospital that night, isn’t it? That’s why you tried to get me to leave with you, so you could kill me yourself when your witch friend failed.”

  “I came to you that night out of curiosity. Magic could not touch y
ou. I’d never seen anything like it. My charms did not take hold of you, nor did your blood tempt me. Naïve little thing that you are, you had me mesmerized, and then we touched…” Andrew’s voice trailed off and he put his hand to my face again. He held it there a moment and then released a blissful sigh. “You are a very unique girl, Grace.”

  I finally started to put the pieces together and couldn’t stop my frown. “So you realized I was different and decided it would be to your advantage to turn me instead of kill me. You want to use me, too.” It always came back to my father. “Except you couldn’t turn me, which means I’m still a threat to you, so why haven’t you killed me yet? Why not do it right now?”

  Andrew’s mood shifted instantly. His eyes softened, and his frown melted into a small smile. “Do you really not know?” he whispered. He brushed my hair away from my face and sighed. “I could never hurt you now. You have captured my heart the way no other creature has done before. I love you, Grace.”

  His proclamation blew my mind. “How could you?” I asked incredulously. “How could you possibly love me? You don’t even know me!”

  Andrew wasn’t bothered by my emotional outburst this time. He smiled as if he found it endearing. “It’s different for vampires. We are not ruled by emotion as humans are, but rather by our needs and desires. For us, to love is to want something so desperately our desire consumes us.”

  That was a terrifying thought. I tried not to show my disgust, but I couldn’t help the way I shuddered.

  Andrew sighed and picked up my hand. “You have no idea how you make me feel. I have been undead for over six hundred years. I sometimes forget that I once started out like you.”

  “Like me?” I asked. I grabbed my fork and began eating again as an excuse to pull my hand away from him.

  “Human,” Andrew explained. “When we touch, I feel things I haven’t felt in centuries. I feel your humanity. It is truly intoxicating. With a connection like ours, Grace, I know I could never be with anyone else.”

  “Andrew, there’s something different about me. I don’t know what, but it’s not just you. You couldn’t turn me. Caleb couldn’t turn me. Magic doesn’t work on me. What you felt wasn’t some special connection we share. We’re not soul mates, or whatever you think.”

  Andrew gave me a patronizing smile. “We do not need to be soul mates for me to love you.”

  “But you can’t lo—”

  “Before that night I’d never desired to claim a mate. I didn’t understand the connection I felt to you. I had to make sure of my feelings before I turned you, so I watched you. I saw how miserable you are, and how you long for someone to love you the way you deserve.” His voice turned hard again. “I saw how your nephilim tormented you and how the wolves looked at you hungrily. I saw how your father dismissed you. I knew I could give you a better life. I became desperate to make you happy. You were so innocent and pure. I found you irresistible.”

  I couldn’t believe it, but I was actually blushing. Not that I wanted to encourage him, but nobody had ever called me irresistible before. I turned my face away, trying to hide the red in my cheeks with my hair, but Andrew had already noticed my blush. He pulled my face back up and said, “You are irresistible, love.”

  His hand slid from where he gripped my chin up to my cheek. He left it there so long that he shivered. Then he began lowering his face to mine.

  I scrambled back, letting out a tiny shriek of fear. I startled Andrew so badly that he nearly fell off the lounger. When he realized what had happened, his face grew dark. “You should be mine right now!” he snapped. “Why didn’t you turn?”

  His temper came out of nowhere. He pulled my face close to his and stared into my eyes. He looked as if he could get violent at any moment. It scared me stupid, so I could hardly speak. “P-please s-s-stop touching me.”

  “How are you resistant to my charms?” he demanded.

  For the first time that evening I fully comprehended that I wasn’t talking to a regular seventeen-year-old boy, but a vicious monster that had once ordered my death. The last of my control broke, and I started to sob. “I don’t know!” I cried. “I wish I weren’t. Then I wouldn’t understand what’s happening right now. I hate being so scared.”

  Andrew’s anger vanished. He scooped me into his lap, pulled me against his chest, and wrapped his arms around me. “Grace, my love, forgive me. Of course it’s not your fault. I’m not angry with you. I’m only frustrated. I can’t stand how you fear me. I want you so much, but whatever this devilry inside you is, it has made you detest me.”

  I must have crossed the border into Crazytown, because even though he was completely psychotic his words offended me. “I’m not evil,” I whimpered.

  Andrew’s grip on me tightened. “Of course not, love,” he murmured as he stroked my hair. “Of course not. Forgive me. I didn’t mean that.”

  For some sick reason, I found his embrace comforting and let myself sob into his chest. He felt my body relax against him and held me even more fiercely. After a minute he pulled my face out of his chest. He kissed my swollen eyelids as he attempted to dry the tears off of my cheeks. More took their place.

  “Oh, Grace.” Andrew sighed. “We’ll find a way to fix this. There must be a way to make it right.”

  He kissed my temple and trailed more kisses down the side of my face.

  I was so exhausted physically, emotionally, and mentally that I couldn’t fight him. I just wanted it to end. I wanted to be home, safe in my bed where I could sleep for the next billion years.

  Ethan, I thought weakly.

  Andrew’s kisses became firmer and longer as he kissed me under my jaw and found the pulse in my neck. “I will make you love me,” he murmured and then his hands became restraints on my arms. “Forgive me for this, love.”

  I tried to escape him, but his fangs sank deep into my skin and a burning hot pain seared through me. I shattered the night with a piercing scream.

  Andrew pulled back immediately. “I’m sorry!” he promised over and over again in whispered tones. “I didn’t know! Love, I had to try. I’m so sorry. It will never happen again. I swear to you!”

  His assurances did nothing to soothe me. My entire neck felt as if it were on fire. Andrew shook me in an attempt to get my attention, but when my eyes came into focus all I could see was his lips—stained the bright crimson of my blood.

  I began screaming again and thrashed so hard I nearly fell off the chair. Andrew held me down and kept trying to calm me, but there was no bringing me back from my panic. I fought him as hard as I could until suddenly he was lifted off of me. The last thing I remember was a beautiful face backed by a pair of glorious white wings.

  I woke up to the sound of a beep and realized Ethan was struggling with the security code on my front door while cradling me in his arms. “Ethan?”

  “Just rest, Grace.”

  I did, and the next time I woke up it was to a stinging sensation in my neck. At first I thought it was Andrew again, but it was Ethan who responded when I started screaming. “Grace! Grace, it’s just me! I’m only cleaning you up!”

  I was lying in bed, in my own room, and I noticed the peroxide and cotton balls in Ethan’s hands. I stopped fighting him and just lay there, silently letting the tears flow down my cheeks.

  “Would you like to tell me what happened?” Ethan grumbled.

  He sounded both annoyed and angry, yet as he worked at cleaning my neck I could have melted beneath his delicate touch. He huffed when I didn’t answer him. “You didn’t call for help.”

  “I…I…” It was hard to remember exactly what happened. My brain was a little hazy. Trying its best to forget, I’m sure. “I didn’t…Everything happened so fast.”

  Ethan pressed two small Band-Aids to my neck and then sat me up. He placed his hands on either of my arms and glared at me. “It couldn’t have happened that fast. The leftovers from your private candlelight dinner were sitting right there! What were you doing out there alone
with him, Grace? How could you be so stupid?”

  The rest of the night came flooding back to me, and I hated Ethan for the look on his face. He was disgusted with me. Appalled by my weakness and stupidity.

  “It wasn’t my fault!” I screamed. “They did something to my father! They planned to separate us from the very beginning! Andrew’s parents dragged my dad off and left me there with him!”

  I couldn’t keep up my anger and became every bit as distraught as I’d been at Andrew’s house. “He just left me!” I sobbed. “He sent me off with that creep! He made me go with Andrew! He doesn’t care about me at all!”

  Ethan sighed. “Grace, that’s not true. Your father didn’t let you go on purpose. Vampires have a way of hypnotizing humans. It wasn’t your father’s fault.”

  “It was his fault! I didn’t want to go! I wanted to bring you with me. I told him Andrew was a creep. Andrew’s the reason he hired you. He knew Andrew was the one who’d scared me before. He knew how uncomfortable Andrew made me. I begged him and he made me go anyway. No vampire charm did that.”

  Ethan’s eyes fell to his lap. He couldn’t argue with my logic. Vampires may have snowed my father tonight, but he wasn’t completely blameless. “Everything’s always about his career! He’s my father, and he doesn’t love me!”

  Ethan sighed again and pushed me back. “You’ve been though a lot tonight, and you’re exhausted,” he said. “You need to get some sleep.”

  I about had a heart attack when Ethan stood up. “No!” I cried, grabbing his arm. “Don’t go! What if he comes back? Please don’t leave me here alone!”

  I yanked Ethan down so hard he fell to the bed beside me. I didn’t care how pathetic it was or how much he hated me. I climbed into his arms and buried myself against him.

  “Um, Grace?”

  Ethan sounded so uncomfortable. I could feel him squirming beneath me, but I couldn’t let go. I needed him. Right then I needed him more desperately than I’d ever needed anything in my entire life, so I clung to him and cried. Eventually he gave up and put his arms around me.